i-am-not-very-sane-but-im-nice

[i-am-not-very-sane-but-im-nice]

Hello all and welcome back to

Cooking

Today we're making a salad! But it doesn't feel like a salad if you know what I mean, and it doesn't even need my janky ass oven!

So without further ado

RICE NOODLE SALAD

You will need:

Rice noodles (vermicelli, I use the wai wai brand)

Roast chicken (i get mine from coles but any is fine, cut into smaller than bite sized bits, for one serving I generally use a half to a whole chicken breast ish)

Lettuce (again, cut into bits, it's a salad)

Carrot (I prefer mine grated but I guess you could have cut up bits too)

Bean sprouts (not necessary but they taste so good, cut them into bite sized ish pieces)

Basil (you only need like four large ish leaves, torn or cut into pieces)

Mango (preferably a slightly sour one, nit really a necessary ingredient but fuck does it taste good)

Avocado (cut into cube ish shapes)

The method

Prepare the everything, I usually cook the rice noodles and while those are doing their thing I'll cut up everything else and put it in a bowlto the side

I cook rice noodles by boiling water in the kettle, putting the rice noodles in a large bowl or saucepan and letting it sit until they're cooked, you know they're cooked when they're all loose and not sticking together, I then drain them in a colander or strainer

Once the noodles are strained rinse them in cool or room temp water and give them a bit of a squeeze to stop them from getting mushy

Layer the noodles with the other ingredients in a fairly large bowl or plate

Mix it all together, add some extra basil for garnish if you're fancy and taa daa! You have a salad! Eat those vegetables!

If you want you can make some sort of dressing to go on it with fish sauce, chilli, garlic, those sorts of things, but I like mine plain

[i-am-not-very-sane-but-im-nice]

Hello everyone

Time for another one pot recipe, this one is mainly based on vibes like most of the rice dishes I make

Also, for some reason I this vegetarian because of the chicken stock cubes I use, despite not being vegetarian and loving normal chicken stock

Anyways onwards to the deliciousness

This recipe is, drumroll please....

Rice with carrots and stuff!

This is a rice dish to help get nutrients into you when you feel unwell (at least that's how mum used it, and it worked)

You'll need

Garlic, prepared in your preferred way (measure with your heart)

Little bit of ginger, grated (not really needed but tastes good and it's good for you)

Enough rice for you

Enough water for the rice (for jasmine rice like I usually use it's about 1 cup rice to 1 and 1/2 cup water, but I usually wing it so I don't really know the exact measurements)

A chicken stock cube (I use the 7s chicken flavoured stock cubes, they're cheap as shit around here)

A carrot, grated

A good handful of spinach cut into eating sized pieces, the full leaves are a bit too big here

Optionally on top of the dish you can put some greek yoghurt, lemon juice, and shivered almonds if you're fancy

Wtf do I do with all this shit

Basically you want to get your pot (or rice cooker, you can also use that) and saute the carrots and garlic and ginger in the pot (saute is a fancy word for fry it a bit in the pot until it smells good), then chuck in your rice and mix it around for a minute or so until it's covered in all the juices that the carrots released, then add your water and the chicken stock cube, mix until the stock cube has dissolved and put a lid on the pot, let that sit on low to medium heat for around 12 min or until the rice is cooked through, once that's done you can add your chopped up spinach and mix it through until it's wilted and tadaa! Serve it in a bowl with the suggested toppings and you have a nutritionally dense pot of rice for not a ton of money made in a pot or a rice cooker!

Have fun experimenting, and please don't burn your kitchen down

Fun fact, if you're low on iron this is really good because the vitamin c in the lemon helps your body absorb the iron in the spinach better

[i-am-not-very-sane-but-im-nice]

Customisable Ravioli

No pictures today and a quick easy meal too

This is a one pan recipe, thankfully for my single hotplate kitchen

Ingredients:

Ravioli of some kind (I like the roast chicken and garlic stuff)

Some kind of vegetable (I've had mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, brocollini, baby cauliflower would probably be good too)

Some thickened cream (I generally use around 100ml for a single portion)

Some cheese if you're feeling fancy

What to do:

Fill your frying pan that isn't going to be used for frying with water and salt it until the universe tells you to stop and chuck that on your singular hotplate and let that sit on high until it's boiling (takes about 10min for me)

Grab out a strainer of some kind and portion out a bit of ravioli in it, this seems useless until you realise just how stuck together these little shits are, so get in there with your hands and gently ish take them apart from one another until you're left with a strainer full of separated ravioli rather than a small brick

Use that strainer I mentioned to gently put your ravioli in the boiling water, if you do it not so gently you're looking at scalds on your hands so be careful

Stir it with whatever you have on hand (I've used a knife before) to make sure the little shits aren't sticking together again and then turn to your lack of counter space and put a (hopefully clean) chopping board on the bench

You're gonna use that chopping board to chop up whatever vegetables you want, I personally really like mushroom and cherry tomato together and brocolini by itself, for a single portion if you're using mushrooms it takes around 2 or 3 button mushrooms without the stalks and chopped into bits, around 2 or 3 cherry tomatoes chopped pretty small, and around 1 or 2 stalks of brocolini chopped into fairly small pieces

If you're using brocolini or similar you'll definitely want to read this part, when your ravioli is almost ready chuck in your brocolini into the water, I know some people like their brocolini mushy but I can't think of anything more disgusting, so we're basically just blanching this shit in the boiling water until it's just cooked enough that it's soft enough to chew easily but still a little crunchy, it won't take long so make sure you check every 30sec or so

At this point your ravioli will probably be done and you need to drain it in the strainer from earlier (just make sure to take your sponges out of the sink before hand, I've burnt my hand wayy too many times on boiling water filled sponges)

At this point I'll turn my hotplate to pretty low cause it takes ages for my hotplate to cool itself the fuck down but it's really oven dependant

Anyway you'll want to put your ravioli and brocolini (if you're using it) back in the pan and on the heat, at this point you add whatever other vegetables you want in there and you let them fry up, stirring everything around to make sure nothing burns or anything

At this point you need to decide if you want ravioli with more of a sauce or if you want it to be a little less saucy

If you want your ravioli to be not overly saucy you can chuck in the 100ml ish of cream just after you add the extra veggies, cook until the veggies are your preferred level of done, and then take it off the heat

If you want your ravioli a little more saucy you need to let whatevers in the pan cook down a bit before adding your cream, mixing until it's hot, and taking it off the heat

If you're wanting to be a fancy ass and add cheese then add it at the end when everything else is done while your pan is still on the heat and just keep mixing until it's melted

And there you go! Delicious ravioli that shouldn't take longer than 30min of active work with actual vegetables in it! Woo!

Have fun and don't burn down your kitchen

[i-am-not-very-sane-but-im-nice]

General knowledge shit

I figured with my absolute shit portable oven I'd write down some of the recipes of what I'm making, this'll mainly be one portion but pretty easily scaleable, these recipes will sometimes have pictures, sometimes they won't, depends on my energy at the time

Oh yeah I tend to swear a bit, if that isn't your thing, let the imaginary door hit your ass on the way out

I hope you enjoy the ridiculousness that is my kitchen