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Horrible horrible country music on at bar. Blitzen trapper ugh should be blitzen crapper

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The Chimp Kiss

I can't remember the first time that I noticed the Chimp Kiss, but I'm thinking it was way back when Richard Dawson was hosting family feud. He did it with every damned woman who came on the show. Maybe it was to incite said feud. Michael Jackson and Bubbles did it a lot too but, hey, thats ok Bubbles IS a chimp.It creeped me out from the beginning. I'm sure everyone has seen it. The highly pursed lips. The faint touch of pout against pout. The squinted up eyes.The total lack of passion (and tongue).  This was NOT the kiss on Hall & Oates list.

When does this Chimp Kiss invade our relationships? Does this happen after people have been together for a while? They start Chimp Kissing? WHY? Do some people Chimp Kiss on their first date?  I see it when couples are saying goodbye to each other accompanied by a "bye Honey" . Maybe some people Chimp Kiss all the time. Even in private. Ugh. 

I always notice this substandard kiss when one member of the couple (usually the female) is being particularly territorial in front of a rival.  Please Sister, I have more hot in my pinky toe than you do in that kiss. Yeah, you're a keeper. Why not just wear a sign that says" I only put out if you buy me_____" I haven't noticed this behavior in gay couples and am hoping it doesn't spread along with the ability to legally marry. 

I actually would rather see a full blown, tongue down your throat, "get a room" make out session than have to watch more of this "I feel obligated to kiss you but don't really want to" cringe provoking behavior. The Chimp Kiss is closely related to the "air kiss" and the dreaded "peck on the cheek".  Do any of you cheek peckers actually enjoy this? Then why do it?

Let's all get together and stamp out the Chimp Kiss and its related offenders! Next time you want to kiss your lover goodbye, make it count. If it doesn't make half the room blush, don't bother.

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Coming soon a rant on what i call the "chimp kiss" not to be confused with chimp lip as seen on stephen king

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Ever since the pens have added player Jussi Jokinen I can't get lil Wayne outta my head " call me so I can make it Jussi for ya"

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Ah warm weather when the birds, the bees, and the beerbellied shirtless men become active.

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Anyone familiar with the strip district in pittsburgh should recognize the cork building. Taken years ago before they converted it into swanky residences

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Southside Pittsburgh