heinzpilsner
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heinzpilsner · 8 months ago
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Book 1 au Zuko: /sneezes a bit too hard/ Ponytail: /dutifully catches fire/ Katara: Spirits above, finally! Now, after you grow some thick shaggy hair or soft silky locks I can tangle my fingers into in the throws of passion, something can actually happen between us! Zuko: Can't wait for a bit of scar kissing so you could show the whole intensity of your love for me, darling. Katara: Of course, my love. Just take your bald ugly head away from my sight, I can't imagine even accidentally touching something so awful. Eeeew! Zuko: You're so perfect for me, Kat. Sun, moon, turtleducks and all this stuff. Katara: I still can see your bald head. Zuko: Sorry, darling. Katara: You know, sometimes I wonder if there are some bizarre parallel universes out there in which I'm not a frigid creature with zero tolerance for cultural differences who can't recognize a handsome boy with a nice body right in front of me because of his exotic haircut. Zuko: I dunno, but there's one universe in which I'm involved with lieutenant Jee and he appreciates how the tip of my ponytail brushes my neck and loves my red ribbon. Katara: Eeew, don't remind me of that godawful ponytail! Zuko: Sorry, dear. Sun and moon, yeah. Sun and moon.
Ozai: You know, I should have burned the brat's scalp instead of his face during Agni Kai. That clearly would be more efficient.
Yep, I totally read Nele's mirrorverse and I can die a happy woman now, lol
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heinzpilsner · 8 months ago
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Me: What is it? A decent M-rated zutara fic with ponytailed Zuko which wasn't written in 2005 and isn't hilariously ooc? Yaaaaa....
Ponytail: /burns in a fight before anything interesting happens/
Me: FFGU#*FSSGH#%;JRGH
Me: OH FOR GOD'S SAKE WHY ZUTARA FANDOM IS SO FULL OF COWARDS
I mean, I LOVE early Lee-the-refugee haircut, it's actually my favorite of all, but good lord. For some reason, the more writers avoid any ponytailed action, the more I want to read it. I sound like a freaking fetishist at this point, but it's just the way my weird brain works in general. I always find myself hyperfixated on unpopular/deficit things in the end. Perhaps my brain just likes me suffering, I dunno.
Or perhaps I watched too much of "Beauty and the Beast" in my childhood.
Ugh.
Whyyy. Just why.
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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lol, atla ficwriters really love "banished the thought/feeling/suspicion/etc" phrasing.
it's kinda cute (but also kinda irritating)
but maybe I notice such things just because english is not my first language
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Wow. Really? 0 notes? Not a single person except for me is interested in what I'm doing? Lol! I really was that bad, wasn't I?
But it actually feels weirdly... Liberating.
I guess I can ponytail shitpost without worrying now bwahahaha
I thought I'd be much more upset about it, actually.
Not sure if I even want to try and change the situation. I still don't want to care about other people's approval or comfort when I do things here. It's too stressful for me to care right now. This blog was never about it.
But I guess it wouldn't harm to think about some ways to make reading my text a bit more pleasant experience for others without sacrificing my own interests.
... For now I need to rest though.
Besides, all these season 1 zutara aus will not read themselves~
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Okay, atla fandom, I decided to break my rule this one time o__o
I'm actually gonna check reactions under this one post (as long as it remains the last in the blog, that is)
I think about something to analyse next, so if you wish, you can leave here a request for my dissection of some scene or psychological aspect of atla you're interested about (I can't guarantee what I'll accept it, but I'll definitely think about it)
Actually, whatever you wanna tell, ask, or propose to me - it's a good opportunity.
Maybe I keep screwing up somehow and you've wanted to let me know for months?
Or you wanna argue with me personally about something I said? Or just let me know that I stink and you hate me for all life? Fair enough. (I'm gonna totally ignore the latter, but I can actually answer to the former in my future posts)
So... Yep. Wouldn't be surprised if the whole fandom already blocked me for being too blunt or too boring or loving ponytail too much, but hey, a girl can hope.
I'm totally gonna regret it, am I? Lol
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Hmm, you know, I still keep thinking about "bring me food" Maiko scene though.
It's the last post on this topic, I swear
I mean, I treated it like a big argument for "Mai's not caring", but actually this moment alone is not enough to make such a conclusion. It works in complex with other evidences.
My inner perfectionist doesn't feel okay with leaving it like this, so here's a last bit of correction.
You see, in itself, Mai's demand tells us one thing:
Her locus of control is in infantile position (she expects from others/her romantic partner to satisfy the needs she is perfectly capable of satisfying herself).
But add to this her behavior in other scenes (such as being cold in response to affection and not making caring moves of her own*), and it creates a general picture of a self-centred infantile.
(*I mean, there was the 'closing Zuko's eyes from Lo and Li in swimsuits' moment, but a) it was played for laughs and b) it reminds me of those gestures Mai demonstrated in book 2 in her interactions with her parents (like offering fireflakes to her dad during epidemic in Omashu, for example). Such gestures have some superficial similarity with showing care, but in essence it is more about demonstrating Mai's annoyance or condescension towards other people's intense feelings.)
In general, love of such a person is hardly more than a selfish attachment to a source of care/pleasure. A kind of love that spoiled brat has towards their mother, actually. Of course, such a child will be upset if she get sick or something. But their dominant feeling will be annoyance: because of this stupid illness, mother can't care about them like before.
("How dared this jerk to drop me and run away?! Who cares if he betrayed his whole family and country? Who cares if he was caught in prison and can be killed soon? He broke up with me through the letter, that's what really important here!")
Once again, such an attitude can change (or at least get better), especially when a person is still young. It isn't a sentence or something. But it requires a big shift of perception and a lot of inner work.
That's all I wanted to say, I guess.
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Tadadada! Here's the epilogue to my 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' series.
Firstly, let's list some main conclusion theses:
1) Mai became interested in Zuko's problems after he directly mentioned his scar and his relationship with Ozai for the first time, so her final change of attitude does make some sense.
2) The basis for Zuko's irrational jealousy was Mai's annoyed facial expression after he criticized Ruon-Jian.
3) The context of Zuko's jealousy rampage actually leaves a loophole for not-possessive interpretation (yay).
4) Despite how badly Zuko screwed up, Mai somehow managed to screw up even more (yep, still sounds contr-intuitive).
5) Mai actually expresses herself all the time and her "childhood trauma" is a big bullshit.
6) Apart from his inner crisis, Zuko has to fix many problematic attitudes and personality settings before he'll become a decent romantic partner for anyone.
7) So does Mai.
Something like this.
And now, a bit of old good boring and inaccurate psychology lecture mistake correction.
I think that I misinterpreted Zuko's side of "bring me food" scene, actually. You see, I saw it as conscious submission in order to avoid conflict with Mai, but...
It actually looks more like Zuko genuinely didn't realize that Mai's demand was not okay. He wasn't exactly eager to please her*, but he also didn't see her attitude towards him as problematic.
(*Not catching Mai's "I'm hungry" initial hint is kind of an indicator of Zuko's cool-off towards her. I mean, acts of service is his typical way of showing affection, which makes his sudden cluelesness pretty notable.)
Basically, Mai and Zuko in this scene demonstrate opposite facets of locus of control problem. Simply put, they both believe that Zuko is responsible for something he really isn't - in this case, satisfying Mai's hunger.
Later, though, it's Zuko who believes Mai owes him something - namely, to give him affection and meet his emotional needs. In his head, he gives responsibility for his emotional well-being to Mai and scolds her when she "ignores her duty" by not being "passionate" enough.
(But while Mai doesn't owe Zuko anything formally, she made a mistake of severely underestimating Zuko's contribution into relationship and his real value for her. This resulted in her coldness and lack of gratitude in response to his affection, which is quite a big relationship screw-up.)
Okaaay, and with that part out of the way, it's time for my final personal reflections.
In general, I have no doubts I made lots of other mistakes during my analysis. I tried my best, but to dissect relationship conflicts correctly, you need to have good feeling of personal boundaries and empathy of your own. And... Well. It's not exactly my forte.
I compensate for some things with theoretical knowledge, but my mind is a mess, so... Yep.
I feel like I have to go and read more psychological theory after this.
Also, I kinda tried to do an entertainment out of this, and roasting format doesn't exactly mix good with being objective. So, yep. It seems I got some kind of useless Frankenstein monster in the end, lol.
And finally... Perhaps I had to make it clear much earlier, but...
I have nothing against Maiko shippers or Mai fans. Ta-da!
I'm sure they have a lot against me now though, pffft.
I realize what I wasn't exactly restrained in my roasting, so it's natural for you to dislike me. But my goal wasn't to tell you what your preferences are inadequate or something. I mean, I myself ship much more toxic problematic shit (and have a weak spot for all sorts of flawed characters). It isn't supposed to be about being rational. You like it, I don't, it's ok.
Dunno, maybe someone needed to hear this.
That's all, I guess. If you were reading this series - thanks for your attention. Despite everything, it was a rather interesting experience for me, and I hope you found something useful for yourself too.
I wonder what I should analyse next >:D
I ignore all notifications, but maybe I'll make an exception soon. Ta-da! What a cliffhanger.
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Okaaay, I'm still alive, and this is the almost-last part of my 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' series. Hooray.
(Ugh, this "little psychological exercise" transformed into some kind of gigantic fire-breathing monster eventually. Good news is that soon I can move on to analyzing something much more pleasant. ... Probably.)
Anyway, let's finish this beast, shall we?
In the last part, great detective Azula found out that the culprit responsible for the imaginary flagrant oppression of Mai's self-expression was Mai's mother, and now it's time for Mai to react.
Mai: "You want me to express myself? Leave me alone!!"
Well, that was... a little bit too overdramatic.
I suspect the writer's implied message here was something like: "Look, if Mai reacted like this to Azula's words, it means that what Azula said is bound to be truth!"
But while possible thoughts in the writer's head are as good as all others, let me be a judge of what I see with my own eyes.
And apart from Mai's forced yelling (as if she expresses her real annoyance, but in an exaggerated way which doesn't come natural to her) and her desire to close the topic... I have no idea what it was about. The exact reasons behind her reaction could be numerous.
Maybe she just got fed up with all this "you can't express yourself" bullshit. I mean, when you express yourself all the time, but everyone around for some reason keeps saying you don't, it really can become pretty vexing, lol.
Zuko: "I like it when you express yourself."
Here we go again. I must to admit though, given Zuko's psychological cluelesness, in the light of the bullshit information he just received it was a nice gesture of support*.
But... Is it actually truth?
(*Quite an egocentrical one nonetheless. I wonder what in Mai's behavior made Zuko think she'll appreciate any of his opinions at this point. I guess he took Mai's story as a food for "she behaves like she doesn't care about me just because of her childhood trauma" rationalization, and this encouraged him.)
What exactly Zuko likes about Mai's "self-expression", anyway? Is forced out-of-character yelling his kink or something?
(... In russian dub they actually translated his line as "I like you like this much more!", lol. It made it so much worse.)
Either he's being very hopeful and patient in his "she can change" delusions, or his tastes turned out to be quite peculiar.
But okay, it's not my place to judge.
Mai: "Don't touch me! I'm still mad at you."
Okay, now her anger looks more natural. Congratulations, Zuko. Although you don't seem so happy about her self-expression this time.
Zuko: "My life hasn't been that easy either, Mai." Mai: "Whatever!"
Directed by Robert B. Weide
Mai: "That doesn't excuse the way you've been acting."
Weeell... technically, it's truth (depending on how you define "excuse" and which actions and life events we are talking about exactly), but...
Firstly - you don't need to excuse person's behavior to try and understand the reasons behind it. And secondly...
How would you know it, Mai?
Last time Zuko tried to talk with you about his life you just yawned at him and told him to stop worrying.
And just now, you denied him a chance to explain himself and shut him down again (right after he listened to your sob story and expressed readiness to support you about your imaginary childhood trauma, by the way).
Of course, Mai didn't ask for Zuko's support in the first place. And I'm not gonna say that his behavior in this scene was perfect, because it clearly wasn't.
Mai doesn't owe Zuko understanding, or anything, really. She isn't obligated to care about what happened to him or to be more considerate about his life tragedy. And yes, people say all sorts of stupid things when they are angry.
But... ugh. Do I really need to spell it out?
Good news is what while Mai is definitely an unlikable self-centred brat, she's still not a heartless monster.
Apparently, it just sincerely didn't occur to her without a direct reminder that when your father deliberately burns half of your face off and banishes you out of the country with an impossible mission, the state of your psyche may be a little bit imperfect after your return home.
Well, that's just one of those things what egocentrism does even to smart people, I guess.
Anyway, when Mai was finally forced to listen about what happened between Zuko and Ozai from his own mouth, she couldn't just close her eyes and dismiss it like she did previously.
(By the way, I wonder if Zuko would ever mention it if not for Ty Lee "skin" blunder. ... And now I wonder whether it really was a blunder or a deliberate manipulation. /paranoid noises/)
Congratulations, boy - your life story is so disturbing it managed to burst even angry Mai's egocentrical bubble. A truly remarkable accomplishment, if you ask me.
But I guess it's never too late to open your eyes and notice other people's pain. Even if for a little while. Even if it's just one specific person you're physically attracted to.
Mai: "Who are you angry at, Zuko?"
Yep, she finally got interested!
Something definitely shifted in her head.
(This whole scene is so overdramatic it makes me cringe though. I wonder if there is a ghost of an Ember Island's actor on the beach as well. They are friends with the ghost of the amateur psychoanalyst, actually. The actor pretends to be different people, and the psychoanalyst dissects all their imaginary childhood traumas, and they have a great fun together in their beach after-life. Aww.)
Zuko: "I'm angry at myself! Because I'm confused. Because I'm not sure I know the difference between right and wrong anymore." Mai: "I know one thing I care about. I care about you".
Well guys, remember: if your girlfriend just broke up with you because of your unexplainable anger problems, just yell at some fire, say "I'm angry at myself and I can't tell what is right and what is wrong", and it immediately brings her back to you!
(Okay, maybe you'll also have to remind her that you're a victim of child abuse for it to work)
Seriously though, I can't say now what Mai's change of attitude doesn't make any sense (like I did previously). In between "Mai acts like she doesn't care" and "Mai acts like she cares" situations there was a noticeable factor - Zuko talking about his scar and his relationship with Ozai. I guess all he said after this didn't really make much difference for Mai - her empathy already woke up from its coma and said to her what this boy needs some care.
So, Mai declares she still wants Zuko despite everything, and they are back to shoving tongues into each other's mouths. Hooray?..
The only problem is... All the other problems what are still here, goddamit!
Perhaps Zuko will try and stop to lash out at other people in the near future (especially physically), but his anger problems are not gonna cure themselves magically just because the source of his anger is more clear to him now.
(Also, the massive complex of problems connected to Zuko's jealousy behavior was simply forgotten as if it meant nothing.
The fact that his general personality settings - such as locus of control and feeling of personal boundaries, for starters, - really could use some improvement was totally ignored as well.)
He is still in the middle of the inner crisis, and he's not going to discuss it with this 'new caring version of Mai' in more details (until she suddenly finds herself alone with his "by the way, I betrayed my country" break-up letter).
What Zuko learned about Mai's "childhood trauma" can help him to become more tolerant to her natural temperament, but since he's delusional about the true situation (in my opinion) and tends to use it as food for rationalization, it can have some problematic consequences.
And while brief awakening of Mai's empathy towards Zuko was an important improvement, her general egocentrism and lack of interests in life are not gonna be cured just by the "power of love". There's clearly some serious personal growth for her to do, and this beach psychoanalysis session did nothing to give her a clue of how to approach it efficiently.
Well, this all doesn't matter, apparently, because now Mai cares about Zuko enough to try and save him from being boiled alive on her eyes in the later episodes.
(Still not enough to deny herself a pleasure of purposefully taking his break-up letter with her on their meeting in prison to throw it on his head)
And I guess this is the result of their beach interactions.
Yay, power of love!
Pheeeew.
I guess it's over. There are still a couple of things to add in the epilogue post though.
Honestly, by the end of this series I just feel exhausted. Maiko is a very problematic ship, especially for an endgame, but this was obvious without any dissection.
There were a couple of discoveries I find quite curious, but for such a big complex material it wasn't nearly enough. And I feel like my psychological competence clearly could use some improvement.
Anyway, thanks for your attention. I hope my messy analysis gave at least a little bit of food for your own toughts.
As usual, I ignore all my notifications.
P.S.: In the end, when I think about it... Perhaps I don't like Mai because I actually see in her an exaggerated reflection of my own problems. What a twist. Perhaps I should try and be less judgemental about her in the future?
... Naaah. Where is a fun in it?
R.I.P., all the victims of Crocus City Hall attack. It actually happened in my neighborhood. Feels weird.
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Okay, another part of 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' series here! And I want to assure you that even though it looks deceptively like 'Roasting beach Mai' series to the unaided eye, it's actually not the case. The differences are here. Somewhere. Probably.
I roast Zuko too.
Anyway, in the last part, Mai said 'hey', and Zuko said 'are you cold', and Mai slapped Zuko's hand off, so I guess this leaves their relationship status in the border area.
So, what's next?
Well, despite the fact that their interactions keep going quite actively after this, we're not gonna see any real relationship progression for quite some time.
So, I suggest to take this as another opportunity to yell at study the characters instead.
And it opens with the roasting of Ty Lee.
(The structure of the beach polylogue makes it quite difficult to build a laconic presentation of the context, so... Let's just rely on our memory this time, shall we?)
Zuko: "You're stuck in your little 'Ty Lee world' where everything's great all the time." Mai: "Zuko, leave her alone."
You know, this moment almost made me suspect that Mai cares about the other girl! It would actually make my "she can't care about anyone but herself" hypothesis wrong, which would leave only one explanation for the "bring me food" moment (That is, Mai just didn't care about Zuko in particular.)
But then, after Ty Lee got emotional and cried, and there was no defender for her among their group, Mai decided it was a good time to criticize her as well.
She had a choice between expressing her annoyance (and intelligence) and sparing Ty Lee's feelings, and she prefered the former. Emotional support of her upset friend wasn't even among the options, apparently.
So, I suspect, the "defense" of Ty Lee was hardly more than another instance of scolding Zuko for being angry.
Apparently, Mai just gets disturbed (and hence annoyed) by any display of vivid negative emotions in her close circle. And if there is one thing in life she truly cares about, it's her own emotional comfort.
Simply put, Mai needs fun and pleasure, and all this dramatic shit around only sucks her energy out.
Smart choice of a boyfriend, by the way.
Pffft.
("But she said she cares about Zuko in the end!", I can hear someone protesting. Don't worry, we'll get to it.)
Mai: "I don't believe in auras." Zuko: "Yeah, you do not believe in anything."
That's a curious accusation here.
I wouldn't be surprised if there were times in the past when Zuko tried to talk about something important for him with Mai but recieved a cynical reaction.
But there's no proof for this, obviously.
Besides, as we soon learn, Zuko is not that good at identifying true sources of his frustrations.
It's still my headcanon though.
Mai: "Oh, well, I'm sorry I can't be as high-strung and crazy as the rest of you."
But... What believing or not believing in things has to do with being high-strung?  This answer just sounds so unnatural in the context. As if Mai responds not to Zuko's words, but to writer's plan her own thoughts here.
(Quite a typical behavior for an egocentric though, when I think about it.)
Still, why would Mai want to change such a convinient topic? Cynical people who proud themselves on their intelligence love talking about how stupid it is to believe in things. It's basically that Mai 'auras' answer was about. And then suddenly this awkward shift.
It's a shame, actually. To me, it would be much more interesting to hear about Mai's beliefs than to focus on imaginary "not expressing your feelings" problem.
Also, I love how Mai just casually called Azula crazy. So much fear here, if you catch my meaning.
Zuko: "I'm sorry, too. I wish you would be high-strung and crazy for once instead of keeping all your feeling bottled up inside."
When. When Mai ever kept her feeling bottled up inside? When she's bored - she says so repeatedly. When she doesn't like something - she criticizes it right away or glares at you fiercely. When you make a scene at the party - she yells at you "for once" (even though she was bored and you put quite an exciting show here, which makes her reaction kinda contr-intuitive. How interesting of an interlocutor Ruon-Jian was, anyway?)
The fact that you can't find among the feelings she expresses something you looking for, or don't find their expression intense enough is a different question entirely.
The fact that she avoids discussing problems you want to discuss too.
For some reason, you just keep barking up the wrong tree here, Zuko. I wonder if you ever heard about different nervous activity types. Or different life views. Or different anything, really.
But this is not the main problem here, obviously.
Zuko: "She just called your aura dingy. Are you gonna take that?"
Yep, Mai's self-worth is not affected as heavily by other people's opinions as yours, Zuko. What a terrible tragedy.
Mai: "What do you want from me?"
A really good question. What do you want from Mai now, Zuko? A magical transformation into Katara a person you wish her to be? Or an explanatory note for thinking and reacting not exactly like you'd prefer?
Surprise, she doesn't owe you anything! Your frustration with Mai's personality is your own problem, and you'd better start asking yourself what you really can do about it.
Take your love life in your own hands, boy, and I didn't mean it like that, you perverts or stop terrorizing your not-quite-ex-girlfriend for not meeting your emotional needs.
(You still didn't apologize to Ty Lee, by the way. Kinda ooc of you.)
Mai: "You want a teary confession about how hard my childhood was? Well, it wasn't. I was a rich only child who got anything I wanted..."
Well, this part is definitely truth.
Mai: "...as long as I behaved and sat still, and didn't speak unless spoken to. My mother said I had to keep out of trouble. We had my dad's political career to think about."
Ahhh, this part though is much more tricky.
You see, for all we know, Mai's mother could just try and prevent Mai from throwing kitchen knives at her father's important guests or from saying that their make-up is abomination. Poor little Mai though would remember it as a terrible oppresion of her self-expression for the rest of her life.
More importantly though... Even if what Mai says here objectively took place in the past, I highly doubt what it's a good explanation for her demeanor.
I mean, Toph has quite a similar background, and... Did you see Toph?
Honestly, it looks to me more like a natural temperament kind of thing. It's just the way Mai is. Maybe environment affected her to a certain degree, but I don't think its influence was crucial.
Sometimes her emotions are more intense, especially during fights, but it doesn't mean she hides some kind of oppressed passionate girl underneath her languid mask or something.
So stop trying to dig her out, Zuko, it's getting embarrassing.
Azula: "You have a controlling mother who had certain expectations, and if you strayed from them, you were shut down. That's why you're afraid to care about anything, and why you can't express yourself". Kinda cheated with this one, didn't I
Okay... first of all.
Why. Just why on earth everyone keeps saying Mai doesn't express herself? Are you blind, people? Or maybe you're deaf?  The Mai I know is one big walking talking act of self-expression!
The real problem here is that apart from her annoyance, boredom and hunger she doesn't have much to express in the first place. Because in reality, she's no more than a hedonistic self-centred brat whose lack of proper occupations and interests in life left her on the verge of depression.
And sorry, local beach ghost of an amateur psychoanalytic who's currently possessing Azula, but most likely Mai's mother's "tyranny" has nothing to do with it. Breaking news: not everything in human psychology can be explained by mommy or daddy issues.
I'd assume here much more prosaic explanation. That is, during the last decade, Mai was mostly focused on her school life, while in her free time, knife throwing and passive entertainments were her only hobbies. So, when the school ended and nothing else started, she suddenly found herself in a vacuum she didn't know what to fill with.
And since Mai is a spoiled infantile, she's always waiting for something to happen, or for someone to give her something to do instead of asking herself that she can do to change the situation fundamentally.
And apparently, being in "love" with Zuko is her only real entertainment nowadays. That's why she hey-ed him so soon after the break-up - Mai's life's emptiness reached the 'uncomfortably painful' stage at this point, so even the emotional discomfort caused by Zuko's behavior was more preferable than this.
And I don't know much about Mai being "afraid to care about anything", but I can say a couple of things about her being incapable of caring about anyone.
Growing up as a rich only child, Mai became used to the idea that everything around is about her. She's always focused on herself and her own needs, and subconsciously expects the same attention from other people (from her romantic partner especially).
It rarely occurs to her that people around may have their own interests, and "listening to Mai's complaints and entertaining her" are not among them. When the reality reminds Mai about the fact though, she just gets annoyed by such a nuisance.
I start to suspect now that her "are you cold" question in "The Awakening" was actually not about Zuko's comfort, but about Mai playing her unusual new role of a caring girlfriend. So, when her performance didn't get the expected appreciation, she immediately got frustrated - kind of like Zuko with his seashell, actually.
(Except that Zuko after this thought about something Mai really would want and went to get some ice cream. While the boy is not exactly a paragon of personal maturity himself, on his girlfriend's background, he honestly starts to look like one.)
Even after Mai's "I care about you" declaration, when she really tried to support Zuko in "Nightmares and Daydreams", it sounded like "I might be hungry for a whole tray of fruit tarts". It would be funny if it wasn't so sad, really. She had a vague idea that she's supposed to do something when her partner is upset, but even with it, she couldn't really break the egocentrical shell around her mind and see the difference between her own desires and desires of other person.
Pheeew. I finished.
Of course, all this doesn't make Mai a monster or something. The girl is only 16, and even if she wasn't, the way her personality was formed is a result of many objective circumstances.
If we look at the situation the way Mai's psychologist could, there's no point in blaming or shaming the girl - only to help her realize the problems with her attitudes and offer alternative ways of thinking.
But I am not Mai's psychologist. And I am pissed by how the episode ignores the real problem with the character and helps to promote the old pseudo-psychological myth that just blaming your parents is enough to "understand yourself".
My dear beach ghost, Mai is already a person with infantile way of thinking! She doesn't need an extra encouragement for accusing someone else in her problems.
It's not you who have to deal with her after this, you know.
Spare poor Zuko, the boy has a lot on his plate as it is.
Annnd I guess it's as good a place to stop as any other. We'll start the next part of 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' right from Mai's... peculiar reaction to Azula's words. Yay.
Thanks for your attention?..
Fortunately I ignore all notifications.
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heinzpilsner · 9 months ago
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Okay, I'm back, and this is another part of 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' series! ... Which means we'll try and focus on overanalyzing beach Maiko goddamit as opposed to all the other tempting beach psychological stuff. Yay.
Anyway, today we're going to find out who of the pair actually screwed up the most. Isn't it exciting?
(Spoiler: the answer can be a bit unexpected.)
So, in the last part, Mai broke up with Zuko, and now they're about to meet again in the company of Azula and Ty Lee after... some time (somewhat between twenty minutes and a couple of hours, really).
The pair had an opportunity to calm down and reflect on what happened (and in Mai's case, probably to hear the other girls' opinions), so I'm sure they are different people now!
They both have analyzed their wrong attitudes and relationship mistakes, and now they are wiser, and stronger, and fre...
Zuko: "Where is your new boyfriend?"
Zuko: "My life hasn't been that easy either, Mai." Mai: "Whatever!"
...Nevermind.
But let's not get ahead of events here.
The scene begins with the royal siblings approaching the girls. Zuko walks past Mai with sad expression on his face while she is glaring at his back. Then she looks away with resentment. But then...
Mai: "Hey."
Well, it was very... minimalistic. But it's good to know that Mai reevaluated at least some things here!
...Which ones exactly is an important question though. What if among them was the belief that nice butt is not a reason enough to stay with a guy who can innocently ask you one evening whether you prayed tonight or not?
Okay, okay, I know.
This butt joke was not very minimalistic.
Seriously though, if we leave alone the fact that Zuko is not exactly in the best state for romancing anyone due to him being a cringe-worthy disaster his major inner crisis...
And the fact that Mai clearly should try and find for herself some sources of endorphins which wouldn't depend on how far from a mental breakdown or a high treason her trainwreck of a prince currently is...
And the fact that this whole relationship wasn't such a great idea from the point of compatibility in the first place...
Who of the pair should've made a first move towards reconciliation in the perfect scenario?
Yep, that's a really important question here
I mean, at first it seemed obvious to me that it must be Zuko - since he was acting like an idiot and screwed up the loudest, but...
When I actually tried to analyze the situation through this paradigm, something in the picture didn't really add up. This pesky elusive something kept breaking the general logic, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it for quite some time, you know.
But I think I finally managed to figure out what it was about.
Mai's reluctant little "hey" is the key here, actually.
(It will be a long way, but I hope it will worth it)
Let's look at the totality of facts:
For the whole day, Mai's behavior indicated she doesn't value Zuko all that much.
On this background, he showed her all his ugly sides and gave her not just one, but several good reasons for a break-up.
Just now, he walked past her without stopping to apologize for his words or behavior.
She is clearly still angry at him.
And after all this, Mai, an egocentrical girl with perhaps a bit too much pride, still initiates contact with Zuko.
Doesn't it seem at least a little bit weird to you? It sure does to me.
And, in my opinion, it most likely means one thing...
It was really freaking cold on that beach at night.
... Okay, okay, sorry.
Azula was also a firebender, bad hypothesis.
It means that as soon as Mai got the opportunity to look at her life without Zuko, she suddenly felt that she needs him much more than she thought previously. Like, much more. So much, in fact, that even her pride, resentment and common sense couldn't really beat it.
And yet, she was treating him like a gum that stuck to her shoe. She wasn't grateful for that he gave her nearly enough and took his affection for granted.
So, you wanna know how badly Mai screwed up exactly?
Take the intensity of all cringe-worthy shit Zuko demonstrated today, add to it a little 'hey' multiplied by Mai's pride - and that will be your answer.
Math is so fun.
I always was bad at it though.
I doubt though that Mai herself realized even half of it - otherwise she wouldn't look that angry. I suspect it was mostly her need in itself that made her forget how to be "smart and proud" for once and make a first move.
Except that she probably rationalized it as "Since I'm feeling very generous tonight, I'll give this idiot another chance."
And she is still hoping for Zuko's apologies, so she could graciously forgive him and accept him back.
...Pfffft.
Good luck with this one.
Even though Zuko chilled out quite a bit since the party, until he sees the central belief on which his whole course of actions was based as misconception, he can't apologize for his behavior.
Well, technically he can, but...
"Hello, Mai, Zuko's here. Of course, you treated me like dirt and tried to freaking cheat on me on top after I fed you all the stuff you wanted and almost broke my brain by trying to find at least something about your negativistic ass to compliment... but I a little bit overreacted here. Calling you a big blah was a bit too much, I guess. You're only a small blah. So, yep. It's all I wanted to say. Take care here."
The thing is, Mai didn't really make it clear that she's loyal to Zuko when he doubted it. She only yelled at him for "blowing up over every little thing" without addressing the topic of jealousy directly, and then everything just gone to shit.
And as far as Zuko's knowledge goes, Mai could call her cheating "a little thing". So how exactly he's supposed to understand his mistake if Mai refuses to talk to him properly?
"He could simply use his brain", I can hear someone thinking loudly. Well, it doesn't really seem to be an option at the moment, does it?
You can thank the writer for this.
Mai here is smart though, and smart girls don't explain themselves to their stupid boyfriends even when it actively harms their relationship, apparently.
Fortunately for Mai though, this stupid boy is also lonely as heck. And despite Zuko's "Where is your new boyfriend?" line (which indicates he still resents Mai for her "infidelity" and probably has been imagining in all vivid details how she and Ruon-Jian feed each other fruit tarts since he left the party), he all but runs to her in response to a slightest hint he is still wanted.
Damn, I clearly need to think of some new Mai-related stuff to crack bad jokes about, don't I?
Zuko: "Are you cold?"
So... You're a good caring boy here, Zuko, there's no question about it. But... goddamit.
Is it physically possible to be more love-starved? You could take a leaf out of Mai's book about how to be proud, you know.
I mean, the hell are you doing getting all cozy with her? She just broke up with you! Oficially! After she supposedly tried to cheat on you! Yes, you were an idiot for believing so, but you don't know it yet (otherwise you'd be ashamed of your previous stupidity and wouldn't accuse her again like this).
Even if your reaction was... unnecessary scandalous that's one way to put it, cheating attempt is still a serious transgression (just like breaking up with a partner is a serious act). You can forgive her if you like, but you can't just 'are you cold' it off! You're supposed to talk about it, goddamit!
Perhaps if Zuko just waited a little bit longer instead of moving towards her, Mai would actually overcome her pride and explain the situation to him.
But when his relationship needed it most, Zuko's self-respect vanished. Again.
And now Mai knows that she can whistle at any moment and he'll run to her no matter what (not as fast as she'd prefer, admittedly, but they can work on it). Yep, that's exactly the message you need to give a girl who supposedly looks at other guys and believes it's okay to use you as a free service.
(No.)
How do you think you ended up in such a situation with her in the first place, boy? Give this girl an inch and she'll take a mile!
Ugh, whatever. I guess it doesn't make much sense to expect such an awareness from a lonely 16-year-old in his first relationship.
Naturally, getting in response to her huge gracious 'hey' just a pathetic show of care and forgiveness (as opposed to expected tearful repentance), Mai pushes Zuko away again, and thus concludes this segment of beach Maiko interactions. Yay.
The next dialogue of the pair centers around Mai's personality and demeanor, so I guess this is what we'll talk about next time. And... Mai fans, I warn you: it's not gonna be pleasant~ (when it ever was with me though, lol?)
Thanks for your attention!
(By the way, all you've just read could be  total bullshit, because the topic is quite complex and that in fact was my third attempt to analyze the situation, muhahaha! Take it or leave it.)
I ignore all notifications.
P. S.: I just realized something. Why it's zutara but Maiko for me? It's kinda contr-intuitive given my preferences, I suppose.  But I just feel like this. Maybe it's about difference between something familiar and alien. I'm not gonna change anything anyway - it would be too stressful for my autistic brain right now, lol.
R.I.P., Akira Toriyama.
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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About Zuko and his destiny
Remember I said that "pride is a source of shame" speech was supposed to be about self-esteem recently? Well, it was a stupid thing to say! Never believe my words ever without thinking critically! Muhahaha! At least I added "I guess" before it, it's my only consolation.
I mean, inadequately high self-esteem is a potential source of shame, as well as shame is a potential trigger of hiding from reality behind an illusion of your greatness, but Iroh was talking about different things here. Sorry guys, my mind is a mess.
This speech in the context was actually about locus of control* and respect towards destiny (and bigger powers in general).
*I'm not sure this term is used the same in different languages and psychological conceptions, but I explain what exactly I meant by this below
So, to regain my honor, I wanna talk a little bit about Zuko and his locus of control here.
The boy's problem is that he believes himself capable of controlling things he actually has no power over. That's the main reason for "turmoil in his soul" - shame is only a symptom of this (as well as him not thinking things through, but more on this later).
The thing is, you're never going to be angry or ashamed of not achieving something you deem impossible. And controlling destiny is something impossible for a human.
Zuko talks about destiny a lot, but he doesn't really respect it. He thinks he can tell his destiny what it should be, but destiny is a bit like lightning - you can't command it, only to be its humble conductor. (Him yelling at the storm in the "Bitter Work" and not getting his "answer" was a brilliant illustration of this, actually)
And "You can choose your own destiny" is a good thing to believe only as long as you interpret it humbly.
That is, you can choose your goals and ways of achieving them, and thus you can affect the course of your life to a certain extent, but destiny always involves bigger (or just different) powers than a person's own will. And when you don't respect those powers, you're doomed to be constantly angry and frustrated with your life and other people.
Let's look at the later episodes of book 2 from this angle.
Iroh scolded Zuko for not thinking things through when he found him with Appa, but he didn't make an accent on the reason behind it: Zuko believed that his will is stronger than objective circumstances and everything should solve itself somehow just because he wants it.
Still, Zuko wasn't all that hopeless, and he actually managed to get this thing right by himself later during his sickness! (Or at least that is what I believe now). His "magical metamorphosis" insight actually was about him realizing that he couldn't command his destiny and thus finally accepting his circumstances.
And it was a good thing and a very big improvement in itself!
But Zuko's general system of twisted beliefs and values was not something what could be fixed just by Iroh's yelling or Katara's kindness. So, the moment the circumstances changed and the "destiny" he wanted became actually achievable, Zuko took it. And this makes the end of book 2 painfully logical.
(Well, actually, I have another interpretation for Zuko's mysterious transformation here.
You see, when you yell "Think of who you are and what do you want" at someone who loves you in the moment they're about to make a decision you clearly don't approve, it's basically a scream "Please be a person I want you to be".
Then, Zuko's choice of freeing Appa was mostly dictated by his love towards Iroh (and a bit by general "to hell with all this, since I'm already here..." impulse). Zuko didn't choose "good" - he chose to make Iroh happy in the conditions when he couldn't really do much else. Iroh misinterpreted Zuko's behavior here, and it was a set-up for the whole future disaster.
You see, he tried to put in Zuko's head the idea that "his destiny" is not something he really wants. But catching the Avatar (by stealing his bison) was something Zuko wanted. For many different reasons. He was neither pretending nor trying to fulfill someone else's will here.
And you should never treat people like idiots who don't know their own desires - this is what Zuko's betrayal teaches us. That, and what love and respect are two completely different things: Azula, with all her manipulations, actually showed Zuko more respect than his uncle here.)
Something like this. Thanks for your attention again?..
I ignore all notifications.
The next part of 'Overanalyzing Maiko' series is in working.
P. S.: By the way, Iroh had a proverb about self-worth as well! "The best tea tastes delicious whether it comes in a porcelain pot or a tin cup". This man has many wise things to say, he's great! … Except what he didn't make a difference between "best" tea and "unconditionally self-loving" tea clear here. Oh well.
I wonder how many stupid things I said without realizing it this time lol. Whyyy my brain is such a mess?
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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Remember how I said I see only two explanations behind Zuko's irrational jealousy? Well, it seems like I somehow managed to overlook screaming non-verbal aspect of Mai's behavior!
Ugh, non-verbal stuff, why do you do this to me
So, here's a remake of my previous "Smart and serious"™ analysis of the situation!
(Why am I so stupid at being smart? I wish I could be smart at being stupid instead.)
In short it goes like this: Zuko took Mai's annoyed facial expression after he made his antipathy towards Ruon-Jian clear as an evidence that she likes the other boy.
That's all. No spicy or dramatic deeply hidden messages.
My inner conspiracy theorist is devastated.
(Still... You can't prove something's nonexistence~)
But here goes bonus content to anyone interested!
I couldn't help but indulge myself in a long and boring psychology lecture character study that would explain how Zuko ended up in this situation in the first place - from a slightly different angle than before, that is.
I wanna talk about Zuko's personality settings in more detail - in particular, about his dependent self-worth.
Contrast between people with different types of such settings was greatly demonstrated by Zuko's and Iroh's juxtaposition in first two seasons, actually.
Iroh doesn't care whether other people respect him or not - because his self-worth is unconditionally high. He values himself no matter circumstances and opinions, so his ego doesn't need protection from negative external evaluations.
His self-esteem though is (mostly) adequate - which means it isn't fixed in a perpetually high position. It allows him to see situation clearly, accept his bad circumstances humbly and work with them efficiently. If he's currently forced to become a beggar - well, he's going to beg alright, it's not a big deal.
Zuko's self-worth, on the other hand, is heavily affected by other people's evaluations. It makes his ego extremely vulnerable, and he has to protect it - sometimes with the help of inadequately high self-esteem.
So, when he believes someone thinks poorly of him, he has to belittle them ("peasants") and/or attack them. When it's impossible because of the person's autority though (like in case of his father), he's forced to agree with their low judgment - which is extremely stressful and painful and triggers another type of psychological defenses anyway.
(I guess this is what Iroh really wanted to say with his "pride is a source of shame" speach. Well, he's a vise man, but he's not exactly a psychologist, you know.)
So, in "The Beach", Zuko couldn't just calmly accept the fact that two random dudes didn't want to see him on their party - he immediately took offense.
Even though the reasons behind the boys' reluctance to invite Zuko in particular could be numerous, actually. From most practical ("We don't want you to burn the house down") and flattering ("We don't want any other hot guys at our party") to the most subjective ("Your haircut is awful, my eyes are bleeding"!)
I couldn't help it, could I?
But Zuko's ego was battered enough by his life, apparently, so this possibility didn't even occure to him.
So, as a result, Zuko had to look down on Ruon-Jian's (Chan's as well) personality and intelligence. Basically, that's what his "He thinks he's so great" was about.
(It doesn't necessarily mean the boys are not idiots though - but Zuko simply didn't have enough data to come to such a conclusion.)
But even after using this method of protection, Zuko couldn't fully stiffle his insecurities and self-doubt - because he had reasons (both right and wrong) to doubt himself.
(Especially since it was occuring on the background of the more general inner conflict: Zuko's father deems him worthy now, but the other autority of his life doesn't even want to speak with him. So Zuko's self-worth constantly jumps from heights to lows and he feels extremely confused and destabilized.)
And in such a situation, Zuko needed to get assurance from a person who was supposed to value him high.
Basically, his "What do you think about [Ruon-Jian]?" question towards Mai can be translated as: "Please, tell me what I'm right and he's an idiot, because otherwise I can't be sure in my own worth."
But Mai was not interested in encouraging Zuko's hostility towards other guys.
She reacted at Zuko's question with annoyance and answered honestly: she doesn't think anything about Ruon-Jian.
But Zuko didn't realize that his hostility looked inadequate to people who didn't see the situation from his ego's cocoon.
So he readed Mai's annoyance as her defense of Ruon-Jian.
And why would Mai defend someone unless she liked him?
The mystery is solved! What a great detective you are, Zuko!
Not as great as me though with all my ridiculous conspiracy theories induced by lack of attention
Something like this, I guess.
Thanks for your attention?
I ignore all notifications.
(Hmm, I think before working on next 'overanalysing Maiko' parts I'll have to analyze Mai's demeanor in book 2 more thoroughly. So it will take some time. ... Goddamit, I don't even like her! How on earth I ended up in this situation?
Oh yeah, I just wanted to make a "little psychological exercise". Lol.)
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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Okay, it's time for the next exciting part of the 'Overanalyzing beach Maiko' series!
In the previous episode, we finally left behind the jealous rampage scene thank god, and now we'll deal with the consequences! Yay!
I'm a bit too happy about it, am I?
Today I'm not in the mood for long procrastinating jokes I wonder why, so let's get right to the business of dissecting Maiko's heated break-up dialogue, shall we?
So, what do we have here?
Mai: "Zuko, what is wrong with you?"
A legitimate question.
Zuko: "What's wrong with me?"
Much less legitimate question. I mean, what exactly Zuko tried to accuse Mai of at this point? Her supposed infidelity? But what if she was in the process of telling "sorry, I have a boyfriend" at the moment of Zuko's attack? Or what - was she supposed to hiss like a cat and hit Ruon-Jian with a knife the moment he spoke to her or something?
(A sidenote: Zuko's reaction could mean one important thing: he was angry at Mai just for liking another boy.
Even ignoring the unfoudedness of Zuko's assumption, the problem is, people can't really control their feelings. Only their behavior - and even that to a certain extent (passion is a thing and all).
So, unless Mai flirted (which would hint on her desire to commit an act of infidelity) with Ruon-Jian or downright cheated on Zuko, resenting her wasn't rational and wouldn't improve the situation in a slightest.
But... Perhaps Zuko in his inadequate state just saw flirting where there was none of it.)
Anyway, boy, even if you don't realize it at the moment, you've just thoroughly screwed up. It's really not a good time for you to go into offense here!
Mai: "Your temper is out of control. You blow up over every little thing. You're so impatient and hotheaded and angry!"
Well, there are far more issues with Zuko's behavior than that, but I have to give Mai credit here - she was able to look beyond particulars of the moment and detect that there's something weird going on with her boyfriend.
... Well, either that, or she simply didn't notice all the other problems here, which could say a lot about Mai's life views.
But if it's the former, the fact that she decided to focus on this aspect in particular is... quite curious.
It actually could speak of her concern for Zuko (and she kinda sounded concerned with her "What's wrong with you" question)... were it not for the fact it heavily contradicts her recent actions.
Sorry, Maiko fans, but the "bring me food" thing is not something I can simply dismiss. It maybe seems small, but it shows way too clearly Mai's current attitude that is incompatible with true caring either for others in general, or for Zuko in particular. And it took place just a couple of minutes before the scene!
(Most likely the creators didn't realise it, but what can I say? I'm analysing the material, not intentions behind it.)
So, not that there is anything wrong with caring about yourself in the first place, but I'd say Mai during the break-up dialogue was concerned mostly/only about her own interests.
And of all the problematic things that were exaggerated or manifested by Zuko's psychological instability (including tendency towards physical aggression, irrational jealousy, lack of trust and respect towards his girlfriend and a long list of potentially harmful attitudes), the ones that bothered Mai the most were... his trademark personality flaws.
Huh.
Of course, Zuko's psychological state was the real issue here. But Mai didn't stop after just "your temper is out of control", did she?
The problem is, being hot-headed, impatient and prone to anger is not some anomaly of the day! It's a most typical manifestation of Zuko's temperament under stressful conditions, and it will never go way entirely even after all the wrong attitudes in his head will be fixed.
And when you choose yourself a life partner, you should be ready that it will not always be rainbows and awfully orange sunshine with them, you know.
(I'm not stating here what you shold tolerate any kind of shit from your partner. That's not the point. My point is... Ah, I'm a zutarian, draw your own conclusions here.)
In short, instead of focusing on real problems, Mai just scolded Zuko for being himself. Brilliant thinking!
Zuko: "Well, at least I feel something, as opposed to you. You have no passion for anything! You're just a big blah!"
... Oh-oh. Boy, it was a wrong answer. Like, a really really wrong answer.
As a zutarian, I fully approve of it though pffft
Basically, Zuko totally ignored "temper is out of control" part and said to a rightfully angry Mai who already thought he was too much of a trouble that her personality* sucks. If he was still hoping to save the relationship after this (why would he though?), his brain definitely short circuited.
(*Actually, lack of "passion for anything" can't be considered someone's personality - unless what we're really talking about is phlegmatic temperament, it's a big problem. But I'll elaborate on it in later parts if I ever manage to figure out what is "it" at all in the mess of Mai's character)
But I must say, Zuko's answer gives us a ridiculous amount of data to work with.
And one of the most notable details here is the ironic paradox of his accusation. Which is:
Zuko basically scolded Mai for not feeling anything and not having passion right after she yelled at him passionately.
... Lol.
I'd say something does not quite add up here, does it?
But like all paradoxes, the situation is actually not all that strange when you describe it more thoroughly.
And it has two possible explanations.
Either Zuko just responded to Mai's critique outside of the situational context...
(And thus admitted that he was frustrated with Mai's usual personality for quite some time. ... Even though before "The Beach" he didn't seem to mind her "lack of passion" all that much. Huh.)
...Or Mai's personality wasn't Zuko's real problem with her at the moment.
If you think about it, apart from unusual emotional outburst (and imaginary interest in another guy) there was nothing new about Mai this day - except for one little thing, of course.
Today she was expressing much less of affection towards Zuko than before.
You know what's the sad thing though?
Both of these hypotheses could be right simultaneously. That is, Zuko became frustrated with Mai's personality and her lack of love this day.
I'd speculate here that Zuko loves Mai mostly in response to her "love" for him. The guy doesn't really need all that much - just someone to love and be loved by (preferably with a pretty face and noble status, but I'm sure different options were possible). Mai just was the first girl around who laid her hands on him in a moment of vulnerability.
But when her affection is gone, it turns out he doesn't really like her all that much.
Of course, he tells her "sweet" things like "You're beautiful when you hate the world", but... Can we state with certainty that he wouldn't prefer something different to admire in a girl if he had a choice?
(Well, technically, he has a choice - but mostly in theory. Zuko leads a pretty isolated life, and there are simply no other interested girls around - except for crazy royalty fans apparently, but security holds them at bay alright. Besides, Mai is already here, and from Zuko's date with Jin we know that he was willing first to sacrifice his dignity, and then to risk his freedom/life(!) just because he couldn't stand to see a girl with him sad. So, as long as he believes he's loved, he'll try and make this relationship work despite everything.)
"It's over, Zuko. We're done."
Oh no! What a schocking surprise!
It was the best part of the episode if you ask me
The notable thing though is that Mai looked genuinely sad after she said it. I guess it was the writer's way to say once again: "Look, she actually cares!"
I can interpret this emotion on Mai's face in a thousands of different ways though:
"I had to drop a guy because he hated my deep personality. Again!"
"My prince suddenly turned into a badgerfrog. What a dissapointment."
"Aww, I really liked his butt though".
"Oh damn, I just lost my free source of fruit tarts. I didn't really think this through, did I?"
"Why, oh why I have to be such a tragic and misunderstood character? It's all my mother's fault. That bitch."
(You can add to this list if you like, it's hilarious.)
The point is, you can't really use this sad look as a full-fledged argument.
(Of course, it's my personal way of solving the psychological contradictions of the writing. But seriously, I don't make the rules here - the "bring me food" moment outweighs all the ambiguous sad looks altogether.)
Anyway, after this Zuko was disgracefully banished from the party for damaging property, so the pair will see each other next time only after some lonely walking and reflections.
But we'll save this material for the next mysterious part of the 'overanalyzing beach Maiko' series! Yay!
(The end of the episode is really heavy with polylogue and all the girls being suddenly possessed by a local ghost of amateur psychoanalytic, so I'll have to think about the best way to approach the analysis. Until then...)
Thanks for your attention.
I still ignore all notifications.
P. S.: While I was writing this, I realized another possible mechanism behind Zuko's irrational jealousy! So perhaps we'll actually make a little detour next time, hmm.
(Ugh, the more I analyze Maiko, the more I want to scream. I mean, to hell with zutara - I'd be satisfied with just those two people staying as far from each other as possible! Dfghkhafffg!)
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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Hmm, you know, I thought I was being modest by telling I'm not a psychologist, but it suddenly occured to me that what I really was doing is avoiding responsibility for my possible mistakes. And it's not cool.
But... You know, it's kinda complicated.
The thing is, I have a psychology degree, but my formal education was pretty shitty. So I actually got most of my psychological knowledge from reading blogs on the internet like any person without high education could.
And I never had any proper practice.
So, I don't really feel comfortable of thrusting my diploma into people faces, you know. But... I really have it? It's a fact? Ugh.
And I still kinda psychologically competent? Theoretically?
I felt like it was a right thing to clarify it, so... Yep. Do whatever you want with this information.
(The next part of 'overanalyzing Maiko' is coming soon, by the way.)
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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So, apparently, miracles happen - we finally get to overanalyze Zuko's jealousy rampage in "The Beach" today. Yayrgh!
(... I had to rewatch this fragment 10 times in a row, can you imagine the depths of my misery?)
I finally remembered Ruon-Jian's name spelling though, that's handy
I have to dissapoint some people with the promised Zuko roasting though - as it turned out, we're dealing here with a much more complicated psychological bundle than just "Zuko's being an inadequate and possessive little caveman"!
It doesn't necessarily mean he isn't though lol
So, let's try and untangle this ugly mess.
But firstly...
Wtf is it with Zuko constantly dropping Mai's food in this episode? Was it "he can't provide for his female" agenda or something?
Well, I for one refuse to give up on the boy before I see him hunting a mammoth.
...Okay, and now back to analysis.
My quota of unfunny procrastinating jokes is exhausted anyway
Firstly, we need to answer the question: what exactly is going on between Mai and Ruon-Jian when Zuko sees them?
Well, not so much, actually. It's basically their first interaction. Mai is sitting on the couch, Ruon-Jian is talking with her. Mai's body is kinda turned towards him as she grins a little, but there's nothing outwardly troubling or incriminating.
What Zuko did when he saw this picture?
He aggresively pushed Ruon-Jian away from Mai:
"Stop talking to my girlfriend!"
...looked at Mai angrily, and then he threw Ruon-Jian away again when the guy tried to reason with him:
"Relax, it's just a party".
Ugh, I hate it
After which Mai finally confronted him (but that's a story for different time).
So... What can I say?
Zuko's intense reaction in response to the sight really can be called many things. But "completely inadequate" and "unmotivated" would be some of them only if we were sure Mai values him highly at this point.
The catch though is that it isn't the case, is it?
The scene happens right after Mai sent Zuko away for her food like some kind of servant boy, and this little detail actually changes quite a lot.
At this point, Mai's possible interest in the other guy stops being an imaginary problem and becomes a tangible danger. Because Ruon-Jian is an uncharted territory with potential, while Zuko's value in Mai's eyes was already established as pretty low.
This context doesn't magically turn Zuko's physical assault into a normal thing or a brilliant strategy though - regardless of his motivation, his actions were wrong and barbaric as heck.
But before render a verdict on our little Othello here, there are some other questions that need to be answered - it will help us to look beyond the "caveman" label and reveal different facets underneath Zuko's cringe-inducing behavior.
1) Did Zuko realize that Mai is a subject with her own will, and not some object for him to keep?
Probably.
The thing is, if he believed Mai was really into Ruon-Jian, and realized she didn't value Zuko that much at the same time, his behavior really would be an indicator that he didn't respect her will.
And yet, when Mai decided to break up with him, even in his agitated state, Zuko didn't try to argue. It could say a lot about his respect of Mai's desires - unless by this time he simply lost all motivation to try and hold on her, that is.
Anyway, so far, we can't state for sure that Zuko was trying to "claim his property" or something along the lines with his attack.
So, the thing we need to detect is...
2) How aware Zuko was about the real state of things?
And... It's a bit like dead Jet's situation - very unclear.
We know that Zuko's initial assumption of Mai's interest in Ruon-Jian was ungrounded, so he was obviously overestimating it. But to which extent, we can't tell.
What about Zuko's awareness of his low value in Mai's eyes?
Oh dear. Outload, he acknowledged two problems with Mai's behavior:
- she is "cranky"; - she "doesn't have passion for anything".
Both of these things could be just Zuko's rationalization in order to avoid the painful reality: "Mai values me, she's just... such a person? And she's in a bad mood?"
Oh, sweet summer child.
Which would mean he noticed Mai's lack of affection initially, but just couldn't bear to reflect on it consciously.
But there's also possibility that at some point, Zuko realized the real problem, but was just too proud to aknowledge it outload.
(And yet, he wasn't proud enough to refuse Mai's food order or prevent himself from admitting he keeps dating a girl whose personality he doesn't really like all that much. Huh.)
...Anyway, we can't detect the exact picture in Zuko's head on the basis of this information.
But it's not such a bad thing, actually - because it opens a loophole for different interpetations, and we can use it both to roast and defend Zuko in court.
3) Did Zuko value Mai as a unique person and not just as an abstract girlfriend?
Well... According to him, he likes when she "expresses herself" and "hates the world"?
Ugh.
I guess it counts.
So, we can't say for sure his attack was motivated just by "don't encroach on my female" logic. And yet, it was "stop talking to my girlfriend", not just "stop talking to her".
4) Did Zuko value Mai enough to try and fight for her - not just for his male ego?
Perhaps. When Mai put him in front of a choice between her and his self-respect ("bring me food"), he chose her. So at least at this moment*, he valued her more than she valued him.
*The situation itself shold have cooled Zuko off towards Mai to some degree though.
(A sidenote: this quiet act of submission was one of the biggest Zuko's mistakes during the whole disastrous day, actually.
Because in the long run, girls don't love boys for their obedience. They love boys who respect themselves.
The gender here doesn't really matter though - submission from any person who is ready to betray themselves for crumbs of your affection is actually repulsive.
Unless we're talking very specific E-rated context here, if you try to sacrifice your self-respect for the sake of love, you will lose both in the end.)
5) Was Zuko's reaction to the scene totally his own?
Not exactly. I mean, we can't just dismiss the influence of audience's reaction - namely, the boy who bumped into Zuko, - on the character's behavior.
There's always a possibility that Zuko acted the way he did because he decided it was socially expected from him.
But it also can be a point to "attack as protection of Zuko's ego" hypothesis.
6) Would Zuko's behavior be okay if he was calm and didn't assault Ruon-Jian physically?
Honestly, it's a very complicated topic. A person in a relationship kinda has a right to try and protect it - if free will of all partners is respected in the process, that is. So I guess as long as participants okay with their rules, whatever bizarre, it's their business.
And it's interesting that Mai herself didn't seem to mind "stop talking" part - only Zuko's anger.
Regardless, we don't know if Zuko would try and prevent her from talking with other boys in different circumstances.
So... I guess it's all.
And my final verdict is...
It's totally up to your interpretation! Surprise!
Zuko's attack was extremely impulsive, and we have no way of detecting which motivation prevailed here - especially with his general tendency of translating complex emotions into anger.
...But I must say, if the idea was to save his relationship, Zuko probably chose for this the least efficient method possible lol.
In addition to his insecurity and lack of self-respect, the physical aggression definitely didn't make him more attractive in Mai's eyes - and his main problem was her lack of affection!
The most important thing to understand about it though...
By the moment Zuko saw Ruon-Jian with Mai, for him, there was no beautiful way out of this position already.
Like, at all.
Chan's grandma's vase could be saved in different scenarios, but for Zuko's pride, it was 100% too late.
The thing is, from the very beginning of the party, Zuko's psychological state made him physically incapable of seeing things clearly and making right decisions. So, the sequence of his mistakes surely led him to this deadlock. I'm an expert in it - I write all my posts in a similar state pffft
And the tendency only continues during Maiko's following heated confrontation...
Which sounds like a topic for the next part of 'Analysing beach Maiko' series, yay! Until then...
Pheeew, I finally did it! Thanks for your attention.
As usual, I ignore all the notifications.
(Ugh, why on earth Zuko decided some random dude needs to know what this food was "for his cranky girlfriend"? I hate this cursed episode, honestly.)
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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(I'm in my 'amateur stylist' mode again, sorry not sorry)
It's actually pretty interesting how Dallas Liu's (yep, I finally googled his name) face type works.
I guess it's because his nose has this kind of agressiveness to it, but his general face shape and lips are pretty soft, and it creates a bit of conflict which can be solved in different ways.
So, minor changes in haircuts and decorations make a huge difference for his appearance. He can go all the way from pretty to downright ugly.
It's fascinating!
And considering this, he doesn't look half as bad with Zuko's ponytail as he could, that's for sure.
The "innocent long-haired prince" zuko mode is better than the ponytail on him though. I guess the general softness of his face is enough to compensate for his nose with right decorations, hmm.
I kinda grew to love him in Zuko's role - not just for this reason, of course.
(It's a shame the script was so goddamn incompetent though)
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heinzpilsner · 10 months ago
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Phew! So now, when we learned what pain of watching new live action feels like, we can finally return to the old good pain of analyzing Maiko interactions in "The Beach"!  Yay!
And today we'll dissect the middle of the party events: it's a relatively short scene, but it just seemed thematically right to analyze it separately.
So, in our previous analysis, we left the characters at the set-up of Zuko's jealousy downfall. Next time we see the pair though, they're just sitting together on a couch being bored to death by the party and... by each other?
(I'm willing to bet though it's mostly Mai who is bored - Zuko has plenty of entertainment with all the heavy brooding going on in his head.)
The pair has an opportunity to talk, but apparently, they either too annoyed at each other to initiate a conversation, or perhaps there is nothing orange in sight, so Mai is severely ran out of topics here.
(The paradox of Maiko I can't help but find ironic, actually - a girl who's always bored dates a guy whose biography by the age of 16 could become an instant world bestseller, and the only use for his tongue she can think of is kissing.
To be fair though... Would Zuko himself really want to talk with Mai about the past three years' experiences - in detail, I mean? There are too many unpleasant memories, uncomfortable facts and things he doesn't know how to interpret in here, I suppose.
And a bit too much of Iroh.
So, perhaps it's really a good thing that talking is not Mai's idea of "entertainment".)
They can't kiss at the moment either though. Not that doing it in front of other people ever stopped them for some reason, but kissing Zuko now would be a positive reinforcement of his jealous behaviour, so Mai neither can afford it nor she's really in the mood.
But wait, they finally start talking! And what a... lovely piece of interaction it gives us to analyze.
"I'm bored." "I know." "I'm hungry." "So what?" "So bring me some food." "Sure."
Okay, I must say this dialogue perfectly highlights one fundamental issue with Maiko. The huge crucial problem which totally undermines this ship.
It's the fact that Mai and Sokka would make for a better match!
... Okay, okay, I'm fooling around here. I mean, Sokka has interests and goals in life apart from eating and kissing, I wouldn't wish Mai in her current state on him.
...But seriously seriously this time.
This short dialogue implicitly tells us plenty of things about the problematic dynamic between the pair and the characters' wrong attitudes in romance and life in general.
We see again that Mai believes it's Zuko's job to entertain her when she's bored and to keep her needs satisfied.
(Of course, she doesn't say it directly, but there's no such thing as "simply stating that you're bored" in the presence of another person. Without any offers or actions of your own, it always turns either into an accusation, or a hidden request "think of something interesting for me to do".)
And her belief in this is so strong that she doesn't ask him to bring food politely, but downright demands it. As if they aren't equal partners or something, but she's either an empress or a toddler who can't provide such things for herself.
And so far, it's always about what Mai needs from Zuko, not the other way around.
I mean, did we ever before see her doing something for him, and not just with him for the sake of her own pleasure?
Maybe she asked him if he's cold in "The Awakening", but... would she really do something about it if it turned out he was?
Who knows.
But we know that back then, instead of giving him something he needed at the moment, she took something she wanted from him and just left afterwards satisfied.
On this party again, Mai demonstrates her consumer attitude towards Zuko (and the world in general, I guess). 
It looks as if she wants to be with him because she enjoys "the perks of being royalty" and the physical aspect, but as soon as these things become unavailable for just a day, he immediately falls into disfavor. And Mai doesn't even see the point of pretending otherwise!
Moreover, judging by her behavior, she believes that just agreeing to be with Zuko in itself is her great contribution to the relationship. She's a big prize, he should be happy to do things for her even though all she does is sitting here with perpetually bored face.
(Maybe she feels like this because she gave him "an access to her body" already. But... Do I really need to explain where lies a problem with such an approach to intimacy? Besides, with a general attitude like this, it's very unlikely for her to be a good lover.)
I mean... Zuko is a freaking prince! He's literally a future Firelord. Who looks like... well, like a guy who can say "you have quite an appetite for a girl" on a first date while pretending to be a peasant and still get a kiss in the end.
Mai is lucky the boy is so unsocialized and has such a low self-esteem, honestly.
(Well, 'lucky' is not exactly a fitting word in the context of this episode, but... You got it.)
But I wouldn't be surprised if in Mai's eyes, demanding food from Zuko also was her big favor - such a great opportunity to make it up for her after all the troubles he cost her today! The stupid boy just didn't realise it without a direct command for some reason.
I wonder why, Mai.
To be fair, after Zuko manifested his unwarranted mistrust of her, she has a good reason to resent him. In addition, his lack of self-confidence doesn't exactly make him more attractive, and Mai's cool-off is pretty understandable.
But that's just not a way a girl who truly cares about her boyfriend would treat him in such a situation. Because to care about someone means to value them. And girls don't value boys they use as a free unqualified service.
It doesn't mean the situation can't change, of course. But so far it's that it is.
(Actually, I start to think it would be pretty interesting to watch Mai's realistic personal growth in general. Most of her problems is a result of wrong life attitudes and depression, it can be fixed gradually. But instead, she is basically stuck as an attachment to Zuko with no room for it. It's a kind of a shame.)
Despite all this, we see that Zuko, a hot-headed boy who has both right and wrong reasons to be offended by Mai's behavior... just agrees to do her bidding.
I wonder if it's just because he got desoriented. I can imagine cogs turning in Zuko's head:
"Wait, food? Who am I again?.. No mask, no apron... Oh yeah, I'm a prince! ... Although, I'm a boyfriend, so I'm kinda supposed to do things for her anyway?.. Ugh! Why social life has to be so difficult?!"
Seriously though, I suppose he just didn't want to deal with Mai's reaction if he ignored her demand. Because he's still afraid to lose her for some unexplainable reason which wasn't yet shown to us.
Or perhaps because deep inside of him, he doesn't feel like he deserves anything better.
So, he leaves Mai alone on the couch to bring her some food. And what a great surprise awaits him on his return!
But we'll finally reach this brain-damaging part of our analysis next time! Brace yourselves for heavy Zuko roasting! Until then...
Thanks for your attention?..
And as usual, I ignore all notifications.
P. S.: Despite all of my stupid jokes, in this blog, we don't shame characters for their eating behavior. If food is the first thing that comes to their mind every time they think of something to do, even after they just had dinner, it actually can tell us a lot about their mental state, especially when it comes in tandem with chronic boredom.
We do shame characters for plenty of other things though, because we are not professional psychologists* here, and we are petty as hell about the fact that Maiko is an endgame ship, muhahaha!
(*Technically, I have a psychology degree though, so... Yep.)
P. P. S.: On a completely unrelated note... Wow, they actually managed to find for Mai's role in live action the person with less suitable face type possible. Like... What was their reasoning? I'd understand if her character required supreme actor's skills or something, but... It's Mai!
Hmm, maybe this girl is good at knife throwing? Who knows. But after watching Azula's, ahem, choreography... somehow I doubt it.
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