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not made of glass - choi soobin

ꕥ pairing: choi soobin x afab reader

ꕥ genres: smut (basically pwp)

ꕥ warnings: soft!dom soobin to hard!dom, sub!reader, fingering, unprotected sex, big!dick soobin lol, oral m!receiving, so many petnames i melted, squirting, spanking

ꕥ wc: 2.9k

ꕥ a/n: the title is pretty much self-explanatory... my first smut for soobin! i want him so bad merry christmas to those celebrating!!

A few months in since you started dating, Soobin is still ever the kind, composed and gentle boyfriend. Princess treatment is always on the maximum level, the reserved soft spot only for you that you can’t help but wonder sometimes how he is the same guy that can’t skip a day without getting into silly quarrels with Beomgyu. He takes you on a date at least every once in a while, knowing his hectic schedule you are more than grateful that he makes some time for you. His love language being act of service, you won’t have to lift a finger around him. Your friends call him a gentle giant, a nickname that makes you laugh every time you are reminded of it.

At the end of a date day, usually he would stay overnight at yours. You are doing your night routine by the vanity, onto the last part of your skincare when he creeps up behind your back, his arms finding their ways around your waist. His head rests on your left shoulders, lips attracted to your neck like how bees are to honey. 

“God, I missed you so much,” his voice comes out much whinier than he thought. You put down your moisturiser on the table, turning around to face him. The wet hair that is evident from the earlier shower he had made his bangs droop down adorably, and sexy at the same time.

“Show me how bad then,” you say teasingly, the provocative smirk you give Soobin is enough to set him off as he lifts you from the ground, the placement of his hands on you careful to not hurt you in any way. Your giggles fill the entire room as he places you on the soft, silky sheets that you just changed this morning.

He leans in, his mouth hovering over yours as he mutters his words of love to you before your lips connect together. The ghostly touch of his hands on your shoulder first, slowly going down to your breasts making you gasp. You continue making out for a while before he lets go and cups your cheeks, giving a peck on your forehead. The intimate action gives you butterflies, watching him closely as he works around to undress himself. The eye contact is maintained, and it’s insanely hot you can’t help but blush seeing him. 

“Like what you see babe?” he asks, completely aware of your flustered face. You reach out a hand to trace his toned muscle, his abs appearing even more prominent than the last time you saw them.

“Very. Looks so hot on you, oh my god—” your breath cuts short as he accidentally tugs the only thing left on your body, your bra to be exact, harder than he intends to as the fabric tears.

“Oh! Sorry baby, did I hurt you?”

Yes, he did. In fact, he ruined you. In the most sexy way possible. You stare at him closely, lips puckered as he tries to read your expression. When you say nothing, that’s when he inches closer, promising to buy you another, even ten sets of underwear if you would want him to. You chuckle lightly, both hands supporting his neck and pulling him closer.

“Soobin, I could care less about that. I like it,” you confess, his eyes soften. Without waiting for his reply, you flip him over. His length is already poking through, Soobin hisses when you touch him there, the feeling shoots him in like electricity when your soft hands contrast with the veiny muscle there.

“This hard for me?” you start with a kitten lick, his hand is flying to hold your hair in place for you, wrapping it nicely around his wrist like a ponytail. Always very attentive and gentle.

“Only for you, love,” he answers, lids drowsy as you start to take him down your throat. You’re long past caring about the drool that drips from your stretched lips to your sheets, Soobin coos at your state and mumbles a few praises as your mind overwhelms with the way his tip presses the back of your throat, the weight of one big hand never leaves stroking your hair.

Moments later, he finds you struggling with his length, eyes watery as you look at him, he can’t help but to anxiously remind you to take only what you can. Your hand that is placed on his thighs is gripping harder on it, yet you show no sign of tapping out like what both of you agreed on whenever any of you feels uncomfortable to continue.

“Y/n–” his own breath hitches, the feeling good to him as well, the urge to just push you further down on his cock blooming in his mind but he puts it aside as he looks at his darling, sweet girlfriend on the verge of tears.

“Love, you can stop now,” he incites, feeling bad for you. With all the constraints, you manage to shake your head, insisting that you can take much more. You relax your throat a bit, breathing through your nose as you push him in deeper. Soobin groans at the action, hips jerking and thrusting sloppily. You work your best to satisfy him, until he’s left a whiny mess, as he reaches his first orgasm of the night. 

He’s humming softly, lost in his own world of pleasure while you fight to stifle your gag reflex, letting the liquid go down your throat before finally releasing him from your mouth. The drool that follows through as you backs away in search of proper breath is wiped away instantly by him, feeling bad as he strokes your cheek lovingly.

“Don’t push your limit if you can’t, baby, remember?”

You could only let out a smile, pulling him on top of you. “I have never not, Soobin. I promise I am okay,” you answer, his gaze on you feels a little too strong, so you continue, “It’s a good kind of hurt.”

“Really?”

“Uh uh. Now hurry,” you urge him, your puppy eyes paired with your pout instantly puts Soobin in position, in between your legs. He’s pushing your thighs apart, working his fingers delicately on your dripping core. You relax to his touch, responsive moans here and there fill Soobin’s ears. “So fucking wet…”

Soobin rarely swears around you, but whenever he does in bed it drives you nuts. The low voice of his, with a little bit of grunt on it and the fact that you're making him feel that way has you pooling down there.

“Am ready now, come on,” you whine out, almost running out of patience as he slowly works his fingers wonderfully inside your pulsing cunt. Soobin is far from stupid, especially in knowing how your body works, he knows it’s calling for something more. Something that only he can give you. You keep on squirming around, desperate for more friction than what he’s already giving you.

“Please—want you so bad, Binnie,” your voice comes out as weak, a high pitched moan follows after when he retracts his fingers.

“Shh, I know babe, just getting you prepared for me, don’t wanna hurt you, hmm?” he coos, spreading your legs further just so he can snug up in between comfortably. His length makes its way to your entrance, your joined moans breaking out as he gathers the slick to coat around it. The pleasure gives you goosebumps, finding anchor in his hand that holds on your thigh.

He finally pushes in his tip, his cock finally stretches you out. The sensation triggers him, watching closely how your walls are pulsing to let him in. Even though he was being gentle, nothing would help when you will never get used to his size. You could not even get a hold of it when a tear drop stains your cheek, his girth inside too overwhelming. His growing concern from earlier only expands, his thumb finger delicately brushes it off from you, pecking your lips after. “Baby…”

“No, I—ah,” you are cut off from one of his thrust, unknowingly hitting your sensitive spots, filling you to the hilt. “Feels so good, Soobin..”

As he sees you struggle and non stop squirming under him, he could not help but to feel bad, slowing his pace and rubbing the skin of your waist to ease you up to accept him. Your expression confused, quite dismayed at the slowing pace. He takes his time with you, stroking your messy hair, pecking every surface of your neckline yet you grow greedy and needier by time. With a desperate huff, you call out his name, he whispers a soft hum in your ear to ensure he’s listening.

 “You don’t have to be that gentle with me, Soobin. I am not made of glass,” you say, eyes glistening with lust as Soobin cups both your cheeks

“What do you mean? Did I do something wrong? Do you not like how I act in bed?”

“No, no, nothing like that,” you reassure quickly, scooting him closer. You reach out and take his hand, your thumb brushing over his knuckles. “You’re so gentle with me, Soobin. And I love that about you. You always make me feel safe. But...”

He tilted his head, lips pouting in focus, studying your expression. “But what?”

Your cheeks are warming, feeling intimidated by his stare. “Sometimes... I think you’re holding back. Like you’re scared of pushing too hard, saying too much, or being too... intense with me.”

Soobin blinks once, twice, his mouth parting slightly as if to respond, but no words come out. You almost melt at the sight, his perfectly shaped lips look very fluffy and inviting so you pull him down to you, giving a small kiss on his lips.

You massages his palm, your voice soft but resolute. “I want all of you, baby. The gentle side, the intense side, even the messy parts you think I am not capable of handling. I can take it. I want to take it.”

Soobin looks down at your intertwined hands, his thumb now tracing over the smaller yours. “I guess... I'm afraid of hurting you. You mean so much to me, y/n. I didn’t want to risk being too much, I don’t ever wanna cause you pain.”

“You won’t,” you deny firmly, voice stern. “I trust you. And I want you to trust me to take whatever you’ve got. Don’t hold back on me anymore.”

For a moment, you both stay in silence, the weight of his body on top of yours never feels uncomfortable, or too much.

"Do you trust me?"

"Babes, if I didn't I wouldn't be here. I would run away once I set my eyes on your big cock," you jokingly say to ease the tension, his dimple appearing as he chuckles. 

“Alright. No more holding back, I guess. You asked for it.” He sinks his face further in your chest, leaving a few marks of him there. Your heart flutters, a spark of excitement dancing in your chest. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”

The rest is history, you can't quite describe the feeling of being ravished by him for the first time. It is amazing. You are too fucked out, too weak to do anything besides moan and writhe underneath him, letting him use you as he wishes, limits all thrown out of the window as he rams inside you aggressively. You are more like a living fuck doll to be filled with him and his seed only.

“You like that, baby? Y/n?” He repeats his hard thrust over and over, distant noise ringing in your ears, his large and veined hands gripping your hips and leaving bruises on the soft flesh. Your body has been decorated with hickeys and bite marks, your wrists bruising from when he held them earlier.

Soobin then reaches around with one hand, rubbing circles on your swollen and overstimulated clit, tears rolling down your cheeks at the added sensation. He only grins at that, loving your response to his touches as two of his fingers rub circles on your sensitive bud. “Gonna cum for me? Come on, show me how good of a girl you are.”

“Yes! So good— argh!” you scream out as you reach your high, your cunt tightening around his cock as he pauses his thrust, waiting for you to loosen up a little before continuing. You lay weak in his arms, sweat trickles down your neckline at the heat. As you catch your breath and the overstimulation passes, your trembling hands come up to his hair, tugging on it a bit.

“More, baby.”

He laughs at that, iris darkening as he looks at your state. Eager for more, although it seems like you are on the verge of tears by now.

“Aren't you an impatient little one?”

“Want you to use me,” you demand assertively, eyes wide and round. Your lips pursed a little, Soobin leans down to steal a quick peck there.

“My baby wants more? You can take it?”

“Yes, of course, I love you—oh fuck!” your voice gets louder as his fingers hovers around your bud, he’s pressing some friction on it so your hands that are on his hair grasp it harder. He chuckles at your desperate action, your legs trying to escape from the euphoric pleasure so bad he has to hold onto it. “Soobin! Oh my–god!”

Your legs start quivering so much, the build-up is insane, three of his fingers start moving inside your cunt uncontrollably, hitting all the right spots. You squeal as his skilled fingers continue making a mess of you, the sheets wet with your cream as you feel your high approaching quickly. Soobin watches you closely in amusement, your thrown back head, eyes rolled to the back, mouth open. You never look so beautiful, gorgeous, very stunning, he could not take his eyes off you.

“Love you too, y/n. So much, baby. Come for me, hmm? I got you,” his soft voice accompanies your loud whines. Beyond his expectation, he’s getting more than what he wanted. As the pleasure increases, you could not hold it in so you suddenly squirt all over him. Your surprising outcome that shocks even you makes you squeal, as you hold onto his shoulder for support. You have never even squirted before.

“Oh fuck, fuck, baby,” Soobin groans, collecting the liquid to smear it all over your aching pussy. “You just did that, for me?”

You are given not much time to recollect your thoughts when you are suddenly being wrapped around his arms, he’s setting you into another position. The touch on your hips are far from gentle as you are manhandled on all fours before him. Before you can complain, his tip is already inside, soon you are swallowing his whole length. Your eyes widen at the change of angle, much more intense than before.

“That was so hot, babe, damn, you want me to ruin you that bad? You like it when I’m fucking you rough?” he’s whispering in your ears, hand coming down to land a smack on your pretty flesh bare on his hips.

“Mmngh, oh! Sen—sensitive, oh please,” your weak hands wobbly in finding support on the sheets, grabbing whatever you can to stay arched for him.

He stays silent at your plea, ignoring it as the slapping skin of his against your increases in sound, his thrust fast and precise for his own release. Your drenched pussy makes nasty noises as his cock rams inside, sounding like music to his ears. "You can take it, come on, be a big girl," leaves his lips wheneve your legs almost give up, his big hands hold you up, not letting you go anywhere further than now.

“Look so cute, you want to be filled, y/n?” he’s dirty talking now, your mind already going anywhere you find yourself nodding desperately. His cock twitches inside, forcing you to take the whole of him, his tip dangerously poking to your cervix by now. And god, does it feel so good.

 “Yes, come in me please,” the honeyed voice of yours could never make him deny you, you are his baby after all, his length buried so deep inside you before his hips shake. The thrust is now unstable as his cum spills, warming your inside. “Argh, fucking take it!”

Immediately after he’s done, he’s pulling himself out, letting the combined release of yours leak. Carefully, he takes your waist, helping you to lay on your back, head pillowed by the softness of your plushie on the bed. You moan at the sight around your legs, his lips pressing kisses around your thighs, anywhere near your pussy but there to not let the oversensitivity overcome you. Your eyes then follow his movement, kneeling to scoot closer to you as he removes the hair strand from your face.

“Satisfied?”

“Never have been so before. Thank you, I love you,” you confess. His hands are now finding home on your back, wrapping you in a warm embrace.

“Love you more, baby. Did it hurt?” he’s asking, eyes wandering around your expression for honesty, afraid he has taken it too far. Your head shakes as you smile, convincing him that all is good. He lets out a sigh of relief, your night spent together while he takes care of you like always.

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Omg is there a mafia theme au wip of cyj???? I really do love your works and I hope your well! Happy (belated) easter by the way and any hint or spoiler about it? I just can't wait. Knowing your current priorities, I don't know when it will ne posted but there's no rush alright? I'm just too into that shit so that's why I could not hold horses so I came here to ask! You don't know how much I love A+ for fucking of Kth and Unbox your present of Cyj! (I'm currently reading your other works too btw) and I'm a mowajjunnie and mafia themes have me on chokehold!

Anyway, no rush and have a good day!

omg anon i'm sorry i took forever to answer you 😭 idk if you're still here so if you are, hi! i am doing well just quite busy with my studies. thank you for the wishes :D

the mafia!au with yeonjun is currently in writing! i sort of plan it to be y/n escaping from her current husband, he was toxic, abusive and y/n has been trying to escape from him since the first day they were married (she was in an arranged marriage with the man...)

little did she knew she falls right into the hands of an equally, if not more dangerous man, yeonjun who is the mafia's gang leader. yeonjun of course helped her, but a helping hand is not always free. he could use something, that only y/n is able to do.

and i'll leave the rest unspoiled! i could only tell that it's not coming very soon, i would have it up on my page hopefully by march 2025.

ohh anon i'm also a moawajjunie!! (also ot5>>>) i'm glad you liked my writing, i hope this becomes a healing page for you!! ❤️‍🩹 hopefully your day went well too!

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sighs... okay a full length soobin smut is dropping on christmas's eve! if interested you can ask to be tagged~

btw i'm open to write any request feel free to slide into my inbox <33 if you liked my content please follow me 🥺 i am also looking for moa writer moots!!

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When the home holds you - choi soobin

♡ pairing: choi soobin x f!reader

♡ genre: fluff

♡ warning: none just very soft fluff because it's been a month since his hiatus and i really miss my home soobie :(

♡ word count: 716

The city pulses with its usual blaring chaos— cars honking impatiently in the peak hours of getting off work and the chatter of countless voices that you can’t make out even a word. You drag your footsteps through the crowd, the weight of the day pressing heavily on your shoulders. Everything seems to get on your nerves today, the bus left early before you can catch it in the morning, the barista got you the wrong coffee order, and on top of it the higher ups at work today pulled forward your deadline to resolve a marketing issue.

Your bag slings over one arm, and your phone stays clutched in the other. The notifications have long ago demands your attention, your phone put on a do not disturb since afternoon.

Yet, through the haze of weariness, a single thought brings you forward: You just need to get home—to him.

The memory of his warm, dimpled smile softens the furrows of your brows. Your shared place wasn’t grand—far from it—but it is the greatest sanctuary. The coziest part of the world where all worries dissolve, and the only thing that matters is the sound of his laugh or the way his large arms wrap around you like a shield against everything outside.

The pace fastens as your eyes spots the building, the familiar tune chimes when the access card allows you through. As you reach the highest floor on the building, with the elevator that feels like it’s taking forever to keep you from seeing your darling, you huff a relief sigh when you see the white door, a welcoming sight. Fumbling with the pass and keys, you finally let yourself in. The smell of something savory greets you first, followed by the faint sound of television playing in the background.

There he is. Your lovely Soobin.

Sitting cross-legged on the couch in sweatpants and a hoodie that swallows him whole, he looks up through his bangs as you stride towards him, his face breaking into a grin that eases the tension from your chest. His hair is a little messy, just usually how you like it to be, and his hand holds a mug of tea—your favorite kind you can smell it already waiting for you.

“Hey, baby. How’s your day?” he asks, his voice soft but steady.

You don't answer, not at first. The bag you carry throughout the day drops with a heavy thud on the cabinet by the door before you take a few steps, sinking into his arms without a word. Soobin stretches a bit to put the mug back on the coffee table, giving you space to cuddle into. His warmth wraps around you like a blanket, and for the first time all day, you feel yourself calming down. “I missed you,” you whisper into his shoulder.

“Oh— ‘f course I missed you too,” he murmurs, his hand is gentle when he takes off the claw clip that has been holding onto your strands, and he starts stroking your hair, massaging your head a little bit.

“Feels like the whole world was not on my side today,” you tell him, voice cracking with sadness. His brows furrowed hearing your answer, lips pouting a bit as he takes the clue in your gloomy appearance since you entered.

“But I am,” the answer sounds light hearted, but he means it truly. “You wanna talk about it?”

You shake your head, not wanting to go into details, “just glad it’s all over and you’re here now.”

Soobin’s lips break into a small smile, rubbing your back as he cuddles you tighter. He goes on about how his day went instead, what dinner he plans to get you tonight and the date on this weekend that he plans on going with you. You keep composed and listen attentively, fingers trailing on his hoodie’s string.

And just like that, the tiring day begins to fade away, replaced by the comfort of being home—not a place, but a person. You love coming home to him, hearing his heartbeat as you lay on his chest, his hands that roam everywhere on your body feels like a healing touch. This home holds you close, and you feel a deep sense of belonging, always.

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be honest would yall read if my fic didn't contain smut... (we listen and we don't judge)

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thinking about how txt members said that soobin’s hands are so big, and that one live where he slaps yeonjun’s thigh so hard man literally flinched at the ache!

soobin with his big hands, spanking your ass until it turns red, you crying out at the pleasurable pain and so fucked out at the way he works his hips into you, big dick filling and touching areas you don't even know existed betore. your whimper gets muffled down by the sheets, your drools messy all over it and of course the wet stain pooling areas underneath your pussy. you can't stop milking him, soobin groans at the tight feeling, warm and ever so welcoming walls. his lips part at the sight, you arched so beautifully just for him.

something about the way that your ass ripples against his hips, the dirty filthy sound of skin smacking against skin filling the room only riles him up even more. he smacks your ass once again, the areas for sure has turn red by now, heck even his handprints were left there. at your weak incoherent whines, he softly strokes the flesh, easing the pain before once again landing a hard hit on it. he keeps doing that for a little while. just when you think he's giving you mercy, that's when another smack lands.

you are not sitting tomorrow.

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can't stop thinking of a jealous and possesive boyfriend!taehyun, seeing beomgyu playing with the hem of your skirt the whole day when he stays seated next to you to watch a movie together. and god what could have been worse is that beomgyu had to be tactile sensory oriented, never stop playing with anything with textures. it wasn't your fault either the weather was chilly so you had put on a knitted one set as your outfit.

the skirt hugs your figure perfectly, beomgyu's fingers being so close to you, to what's his it is inevitable that taehyun gets pissed off so bad he went up to you and told you to enter the bedroom. you protest at first, refusing to let down the movie that only had a little over 20 minutes to finish. taehyun was having none of it though, his stern "bed. now. or else you can't even dream to come over our place anytime soon." leaving you no choice but to sprint to his room. the clothes gets thrown in every direction as he impatiently starts fucking you. you try to keep down your whimpers and moans, afraid of being caught from the boys outside but he's smart enough to drill into one spot he knows you are most sensitive, leaving you dumb, unaware of how you’re screaming out loud.

until they all, until beomgyu hears how good he’s making you feel. only then will taehyun be relieved.

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guys i'm coming back very soon! some works will be published this month (after an eternity of my inactiveness)

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light and promise are definitely my favorite concepts! how do they manage to outdo themselves every single comeback :D

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Umm so I read your fic w Terry AND I LOVED IT.

I have an idea if you are open to writing for Terry...

Y/n takes mbti test again and found it is intj. Taehyun is estp (and they are not a match at all ㅠㅠ) .

That's why y/n is sulking at her desk even though she should be happy cuz her final exams are over and Terry and her couldn't enjoy the night cuz of his busy schedule. When he texts y/n, they don't reply and that's what makes Terry come home. He learns the reason after much ask and coaxing y/n and decides to spice things up.......... Ummmmmmm and yeah, just be there for y/n.

(P s. This is my first ask)

hi anon! thank you for sending me my first ask too! this was written according to few website about intj and estp, i’m sorry if it’s not accurate enough. i hope you liked it <33

to this anon and everyone, feel free to send me ask or request! it’s open but please make sure you read my guidelines first :D

None of that matters - kang taehyun

♡ pairing: idol!taehyun x fem!reader

♡ genres: angst, smut

♡ warning: dom!taehyun, sub!reader, unprotected sex, reader asks him to be rough, no prep, breast and nipple play, choking, sex in front of a mirror, and very brief aftercare

♡ wc: 2.6k

You hear the door unclicks, revealing Taehyun in his usual sweatshirt and jogger pants that he usually wears to dance lessons. Your eye meets his, the pout on your lips didn’t go unnoticed by Taehyun as he shuts the door and walks over to you. You are on the bed, eighty percent of your body covered by the thick blanket due to the room’s temperature.

“Babe,” he calls out after seeing you turn your back on him. You feel the bed shifts on the corner, signaling that he is sitting there. “I thought you’d be asleep already.”

You don’t reply, feeling your heartbeat calming when Taehyun’s hand softly makes its way to your hair, gently organising the strands and tucking them behind your ear. “Won’t look at your boyfriend?”

You slowly scoot over, turning to face him with a little smile as you mutter a soft hi to him. Taehyun’s dimple peeks out as he sees your face.

“Why don’t you reply to my text, hmm? It’s super late too, I thought you’re asleep.”

“No, I was charging my phone and I can’t sleep. I had coffee after dinner,” you choose to lie, not wanting to come clean and rather enjoy your time with him since you rarely ever see him nowadays.

On these days, he is usually busy preparing for their comeback in a little over a month from now. You didn’t want to ruin what little time together you are getting these days, and you think it would be stupid to tell Taehyun that you’re feeling under the weather due to some silly MBTI test’s result, and you are more than certain that he is only gonna say it wasn’t anything you should worry about.

Taehyun lets the silence grow for a while. Just by one look at your face, he knows there is something on your mind. You would never drink coffee unless you have a lot to think about, whether it’s making you sad, stressed or anxious. He’s gonna have to make it through for you to be honest with him.

"You're not having a good day, huh?" he asks, pouting his lips sympathetically, and you don’t even realise you nod quickly. You love how he immediately understood you, just from your gaze alone.

“What’s wrong? Tell me, baby, I could help,” he speaks up, voice laced with such gentleness and care that you find your eyes swelling up at the overwhelming emotions. Taehyun is quick enough to hold you in his arms, his face filled with worry as he hears you let out a sniffle.

“Sweetheart…” he calls out, your tears forming a wet stain on his sweatshirt from your cry. Taehyun rubs your back with his hand, his lips pressing kisses on your forehead before you pull away for a second, his stomach churn when he sees your red face and face wet with tears. “What is it, y/n?”

“It’s stupid,” you mumble, a forced laugh leaving your mouth as you wipe the tears away, trying to focus on him and not the unpleasant feeling.

“No it’s not, if you are this sad then it isn’t stupid okay? You can talk to me about it. I know I cannot heal the hurt, but I will hold you until you feel better.”

You could not help but smile softly at his words, the emotions running through you once again as you wonder where on earth did you manage to find him in this world full of people? Before you even know it you burst into tears once again as Taehyun looks at you with confusion and worry as you bump your head into his chest again.

“Talk to me, love. I’m not here to judge you or provide a solution, I’m just all ears for you, okay?” He’s trying his best to comfort you, and you feel like there’s no other things for you to say rather than tell him the truth. You take a deep breath before starting.

“I just had an MBTI test, I got the result that says it’s the least compatible with yours,” you ramble quickly, words inaudible due to your sniffling voice but Taehyun manages to catch on a few words here and there. He’s patient enough to let you break down, choking on your words as he tells you to take a breath and continue whenever you’re ready.

“And, I think I’m sad because I think we are unable to understand each other fully. I get upset over these small things when they aren’t even in your head longer than a minute,” you paused, Taehyun’s thumb is gentle in removing the that one tear that slips from your left eye as you continue, “I care so much about little things that I find it hard to even tell you, because I know you won’t even bat an eye on it. I also get so upset when things don't go according to plan and I struggle to get over it.”

“I’m sorry that you feel that way,” he sighs, his tender touch on your cheeks makes you lean slightly closer to his fingers, getting comfortable with his heat.

“Why are you apologizing?” you ask, blinking once and looking at him with guilt and still an upset face.

Taehyun remains silent as he gently pecks your lips. “I know you need to have more alone time, it's okay if you don't want to go out with my random plans, I know it's too much for you to go out without a proper plan.”

“I’m sorry, I really like to go out only when we have organised plans, I feel anxious if we leave home without a proper one and be spontaneous with it.”

“I understand, baby. I hope we can communicate better so I can know why you're upset rather than shutting yourself from the world. I am willing to adjust to perfect our relationship.”

You melt at his words, he says it with so much passion, his round eyes look at you like you’re the center of his universe, shining with pure adoration.

"You have every right to be upset. I should be lucky my baby loves me so much, you don't even ask for a lot. I'm sorry I've been neglecting and canceling on your plan so much these days, I will try to take some time off so we can go out with your plans and I can love you properly."

“Taehyun…” you start crying again, not expecting those kinds of words to flow out from him. His hand aimlessly pats on your back as your body trembles at how you are sobbing to his words.

"You cry because you care. I never tell you this, but I love that you care so much. I love that you teach me to go out of my comfort zone. I learn so much from you and I'll never meet anyone else who loves and cares for others the way you do. You don’t ever have to change, baby, you can be yourself with me, you can cry all you want. It’ll be better, okay? I promise you’re okay.”

You let out a soft sigh at his words, bumping your forehead into his chest as you listen to his encouragement.

“We can try to be understanding about each other, teach each other from our different personalities, respect each other's ways of living and working. Who says we're not compatible, huh? It's so much more beneficial in a relationship if it can mean we deal with issues there and then instead of brushing them under the carpet,” he ends the discussion by pulling you into a kiss, hand gliding down on your body to push you on the bed.

Your heart starts beating a little bit faster, feeling the kiss starts to be more impatient so you wrap your hands around his neck as you grow more and more excited at what unfolds at the steamy scene. Taehyun fucks you hard on your good days, likes to tease you, get you squirming. The key difference is that he makes sweet love to you on your bad ones. He would hold you flush to his chest while he rocks into you under the warmth of your shared blankets.

“I'm gonna show you none of that matters when you're with me, love,” he announces, hands slowly working to get you off your clothes until you are present naked in front of him. He leans in to capture your lips passionately, sighing in pleasure as he feels your breath quivering as he touches your breasts with so much yearning. He takes his time to let his light touches travels across your body until you grow needier, wanting him to break through gentleness and starts fucking you properly.

“Don't be gentle with me, Tyun. I like it when you're rough,” you break the silence, earning an intense glare from Taehyun, lips breaking into a smirk, pressing a tender kiss on your clit.

“Be careful what you ask for, love,” he says with a honeyed voice, laced with deceitful wiles that makes you nod desperately. “Never been so sure.”

“You know I love you so much right, love?”

“Of course,” you choke out your answer, his fingers in your hole retracted so suddenly and before you can complain, he pulls you up into all fours, pushing his cockhead in balls deep. You scream his name at the sudden intrusion, your walls struggling to fit him in but he couldn’t care less even when you fall forward at the force, pulling your hair from the back to help you get into proper position.

“Good, because I'm about to fuck you like I don't,”

As you're struggling to take his cock, he starts rushing ruthlessly in and out of your cunt, he groans at your tightness, your hole practically gripping onto his length.

“So big, Taehyun,” you let out multiple whimpers from the pain that are engulfs with pleasure also, your tears falling as you feel his tip poking in at your cervix.

“You can take it, can you?” he questions, seeing your fisted hand grabbing the sheets, too overwhelmed from the feeling and before you can answer, he slaps your asscheek two times, “I know you can. You say you like it.”

You struggle to keep up with his pace, eyes rolling to the back of your hand when you feel him run his hands all over your body, toying with your sensitive nipples and also reaching down your core to fondle with your pussy folds.

“Look at me when I'm making you feel this good, baby,” he digs his fingertips into your thighs, waiting for you to raise your head and watch the mirror to watch yourself getting railed into tomorrow. However it takes too long for you to do it yourself, so his hands creep up from behind your back, tugging your hair that makes you yank your head upwards with a wince at the slight pain. He then places a hand on your throat, choking you so you remain in your eye contact with him by looking into the mirror. You whimper in his hold as he delivers a light slap to your ass. He holds your thigh so tight you think it should be hurting, but you're too focused on how he manages to fuck you so roughly without slowing down.

“Fuck, Tae, feels s'good,” you moan out, a bit inaudible when he's limiting your lung capacity with a choke, finding yourself panting in search of proper breath yet hugely turned on by it.

Of course, it doesn't go unnoticed by Taehyun, you see his reflection in the mirror smirking at your state, angling his thrust into that one position that he knows is your spot, hearing you let out a throaty moan as a reaction. He keeps going on doing that for a while, your back arched to his front as you come all over his cock. Before you could tap on his arm to let him know you can't keep up with the choke anymore, his hand flew away from your throat and you huff in response, feeling oxygen fill you again.

“Taehyun…” you softly say as he slows down to let you calm down from your high, his lips pressing kisses on your shoulder as he coos and says sweet nothings, leaving your head spinning at the overwhelming feeling, finding yourself to want more at how good it feels. “More, more, please–can't get enough–oh!”

The moment Taehyun hears you open your mouth to plead for more, he grabs your body, pushing you on your back, hovering on top of you. You barely have any time to catch a breath as he starts thrusting again, his hand holding both your thighs before he presses them to your chest, securing both hands underneath your knees as he manhandles you into a mating press position.

“Mine, you are mine love, fuck all who says we aren't compatible when I got you wrapped around my cock feeling like heaven,” he voices out in a frustrated voice, your moan accompany his words as you nod and parrots him when he says you're mine with i'm yours.

He keep thrusting, his cock reaches deeper now that you’re in this position until you're bucking your hips against his pace and practically start fucking yourself on him while he pumps in and out of you. It hurts, but you find yourself liking it, the feeling of being so full with him, the fast rhythm, the way his balls insist on slapping around your most sensitive spots, to his amusement you cum again, your walls clenching around his cock so good that keeps him going until you drive him to his own climax.

His release spurts into you, the warmth spreading inside before it begins to leak out, trickling down your thigh, mixed with your own release when he pulls out slowly from you.

You’re exhausted, so ready to fall asleep right there as you find your body relaxing after all the orgasm and the way he whispers praises, he does not forget to throw a few i love yous in between, showering you in endless kisses all around your spent body.

You eye his movement as he stands up to grab a cloth to start cleaning you up, the silence fills the room as he diligently puts you into a comfortable sleepwear. At the eye contact, he pecks your lip once, letting it linger for a few seconds before pulling away, asking you, “You okay, love?”

His lips curl into a smile when you nod, leaning into his warmth as he gets on the bed with you, both of you not saying anything as the night deepens but his presence is loud enough to remind you that he really means that none of that matters when he is with you.

[healingpage]

moonstone (why didn't you tell me) - choi beomgyu

♡ pairing: bestfriend!beomgyu x f!reader

♡ genres: angst, fluff, smut (childhood friends/best friends to lovers au, one bed trope, drunk confession, sort of idiots to lovers also)

♡ rating: 18+ mdni

♡ warning: cheating (not by both mcs), mature language, alcohol consumption (drinking) | smut warning: soft!dom beomgyu, sub!reader, drunk sex (but it's all consensual), unprotected sex, breast and nipple play, fingering, brief cockwarming and a bit of aftercare

♡ wc: 11.4k

♡ summary: After a painful betrayal by her fiance and a backstab with her close friend, Y/n is heartbroken. When her best friend, Beomgyu, discovers her called-off wedding, he brings her to the land of Japan, believing that over the course of the four day trip, he can convince her to come home happy, or to at least move on from the guy. But his plan goes south when Y/n finds a note on his phone, about his actual feelings on her previous relationship.

♡ a/n: happy birthday to my baby bear, choi beomgyu 💗 this is my first fic that exceeds 10k words, i actually am happy to see how it turns out but of course there's always room for improvement, but i'm gonna let the raw emotion of this one flows by itself <3 thank you for your attention, always grateful for each and every one of you. reblogging and comments make my day btw :D

♡ taglist: @my313 @boba-beom @junnmizz (i can’t seem to tag you, sorry!) @naweirdo

You weren’t expecting that you had gone along with him for so long. And Rachel too. Rachel had told you for weeks that she’s going to end her relationship with her boyfriend soon, that he cheated on her for another girl. Yet she’s there, doing the very same thing that she told you she swears she hates the most on earth.

And here you are, hands cupped on your mouth as you eye the two of them, Rachel occupying the spot that was always reserved for you. Your fiancé, looking as comfortable as ever when he presses small kisses on her lips, cheek and neckline erecting a few giggles to come out from her. Your eyes water at the situation unfolding before you, all the preparations for your wedding going through your mind as you contemplate your next step. Feeling like you are unable to take care of the situation now, you choose to step back, running outside his apartment with your heart thumping like crazy.

Every now and then, you catch yourself reminiscing all the years spent with him. The events that come crashing down as you saw him cheating on you with your own two eyes has largely affected you. You find it difficult to fall asleep, eating much less than before, barely holding a conversation with anyone or even stepping out of the house.

With your cheek resting against the couch, you hear the passcode being clicked in before your door unlocks, revealing Beomgyu. His presence brings you to your feet to greet him quickly, your eyes locked with him as you awkwardly tidy your messy clothes as Beomgyu takes in your appearance since he last saw you, two days ago.

His footsteps inches closer to you, soft hands tracing the bangs that are sticking on your forehead due to the thin sweat as he engulfs you in a hug. You let out a sigh, one that sounds like a relief to Beomgyu’s ears as he sits you down on the sofa again.

“Your mother asked me to check on you,” his taut voice bleeds to your ears as he plops down next to you. He knows what happened between you and your fiancé, the current state of yours making your parents worry they had to send Beomgyu over knowing you would either reject their phone calls and leave their texts unread. It wasn’t any of your intention, you just feel like you have disappointed them in a way since the man was actually your parents’ choice, him being the son of your parents’ friend, but he was still nice to you, giving you butterflies and all. The relationship was nice while it lasted, though your parents never blame you for anything that happens, you would rather step back and not see them–your parents, him and his parents for a while.

“I am fine, I have been binge-watching my favourite series,” you reply in a sing-songy voice, trying to show you are doing great. However Beomgyu doesn’t seem to buy that, knowing you even before you start developing a crush on your first ever heartbreak, even a slight change in your voice tone would never go unnoticed by him.

Both of you used to fall asleep under the night sky together, watching the sunrise several times during your teenage years. Even when you were going through puberty, had a massive breakout on your face, getting rejected for the first time ever, Beomgyu was the one who would take you in his arms. He has been a character in your life for so long, quite literally because he ends up being born to a family living right next to your family’s door. You don’t have much memory of your childhood, but your mom sometimes tells you about how she is reminded by how mischievous he was as a kid, playing jokes around you while you were a quiet, reserved girl that you would end up running to home, crying in her arms due to his endless tricks. Beomgyu came over the next day, asking for an apology and promised to tone down his cheekiness with your colour pencils in his hand after his parents tell him you cried because he hid them.

The roles have never switched since then, he was always the more popular and friendly one, whereas you liked to keep your circle small, focusing on your studies while Beomgyu was the kind that is satisfied if he barely passed. As you grow up, you guys have been quite distant since you got engaged, him respecting your relationship and not lingering around you too much that your fiance would be icked by it.

“Lie to me if that makes you feel better. Like I just met you yesterday, y/n.”

Your brows raise hearing his statement, trying not to let it go ahead of you. On such occasions, you would blurt out things to him to counter that remark, but your bottling emotions take over you today as your lips tremble with eyes swelling tears that threaten to fall at any time. 

“Angel…” he calls, eyes softening at your glassy eyes before his attempt at tender hands coming up to cup your cheek fails as you move away from his touch and start breaking down. Your knees fall first to the floor as you burst into tears, covering your face with both palms of your hands. Beomgyu’s heart is wrenched, he has seen you cry multiple times, over multiple causes and even people, but the agony in your sob this time stings him so bad that he realises he would never want you to cry again. 

“I–I…” you start to sob continuously, unable to form a coherent sentence so Beomgyu crushes you in his arms so tight, so close to the point he feels like he’s about to break your bones. Your hiccups are audible to him, drawing a pout to appear on his lips as he rubs your back and hair in the gentlest way possible, as if you are made of glass.

“It hurts right? I know, angel. Cry it all out. You have to let it out, to feel better, okay?” he whispers in your ear, encouraging you when your weep grows louder, the excruciating pain that you have been keeping in shatters when you feel the comfort in his arms. It is so strange to think that when you are alone in your apartment, without anyone’s presence you could not shed even a single tear, yet when you are in his always welcoming, warm hug, you feel like you are 9 again, when you first cried over falling from your first bike ride in his arms. With him, you would never feel like being judged or belittled for crying over big or small matters. He is like a bear that engulfs you with comforting cosiness, holding you until your tears dry or sleep overtakes you. 

“She’s very pretty too,” you tell him with all your might, super torn that it is your close friend too, she even got invited to your wedding that is supposed to happen this weekend.

“If I–I didn’t catch them, he would marry me, probably–maybe even act like nothing ever happened between them,” you continue sobbing into his chest, your voice muffled yet Beomgyu is able to tell each and every syllable of it, paying close attention to your voice.

“You know I would kill for you right? Do you want me to kill him?” he sighs in your ear once your trembling wails come to a halt, guiding you to take a few deep breaths as your throat feels hoarse due to your bawling earlier. You look up to him with the corner of your mouth that is drawn down as you sniffs one last time before saying, “You are an idiot.”

Beomgyu frowns in disbelief at your choice of first things to say after crying, rolls his eyes in annoyance before chuckling. “Yet you are the one that cried for that hopeless man.”

His words stab you a little, enunciating a small pout from you before Beomgyu coos and hurriedly says sorry. He wipes your tears away so tenderly that you close your eyes at the feeling of his soft touches before he grabs your hand, helping you to stand up from the floor and sit on the sofa facing him.

“I have something to show you.” Beomgyu takes out a piece of paper, taking your hands and putting the sheet on your palm. You raise your eyebrows slightly, asking him through eye contact as he pokes your cheek and says, “Open it.”

Your eyes drift to the printed paper before you cup your mouth. “No way.”

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

The wedding was, of course, cancelled. You have told your parents to be the one that breaks the news to all invited people, the first few days were the hardest, your phone blowing up with texts and calls from all your acquaintances, some contacting to deliver you their sympathy, some were providing you unnecessary advice and some were obvious to be nosy of the reason the ceremony is called off. It has tainted you in the worst way possible that Beomgyu had to step in by force to snatch the phone, opting to log out of all your social media accounts and remove the sim from your phone for you to be out of reach.

Closing your eyes, you let the cold breeze greet you fully, cheeks going rosy due to the slightly cold weather. Right beside you, Beomgyu was smiling softly, looking at you that still has your eyes closed as you take in a few breaths to relive the moment. The paper that he showed you that day actually contains the printed flight ticket to Japan. He then explained that he remembers the country being one of your favourite places to travel to, his vague memory still remembers when both your families used to travel to Japan at least once a year since middle school together during long school breaks. You were a bit hesitant at first, not saying yes right away to his offer that left him with furrowed eyebrows as the date of all the accommodations and flight that he booked was actually only five days away. You finally give in one day before the plane takes off, not wanting to let it all burn.

Now you are in Osaka, the place that feels familiar the most to you, so many memories during your trips with him passing through your mind. The last time you went here together was almost six years ago, after your high school ended. You don’t realise that you have been spacing out for almost a good three minutes, in a very busy street, the centre of the city where people are walking around. Beomgyu stands close to you, making sure to not let any pedestrians there bump into you.

He patiently waits for you to settle in, looking around in the middle of the city with flowers blooming in season, the wind slightly pushing your bangs out of your face, providing him very clear vision of your eyes lighting up. Your expression looks way brighter than when you were trapped in the confined area of your apartment, cornered by all your thinking. For this four days and three nights trip, Beomgyu is determined to make you return to Korea with a smile on your face, forget all the bad past events and start a new journey.

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

“Uh? Why is there only one bed?” you ask, confused at the only bed present in the hotel room, a queen sized bed at that. 

“What’s wrong with that?” Beomgyu replies with another question. “We sleep on one bed all the time you and I sleep over each other’s house.”

“Sure…” you hesitantly walk inside, taking a good look around the spacious room, the space just enough for the two of you to get comfortable with your own space but still in reach with each other. Beomgyu follows you inside, him being a gentleman, also helping you with your luggage. You don’t know why he’s so committed to that role since you landed, opening doors for you, giving you his jacket when you shiver whilst waiting for the cab to fetch you, pressing the elevator buttons and always making sure you go in first anywhere safely when he usually would steal your scarf when he’s cold, go inside any entrance alone and even leave the door slamming at your face, never holding them out for you.

“You know, my heart is the one in pain, not my body. Thank you though,” you say sarcastically, pulling the luggage’s handle from him erupting an awkward laugh from him. The room then falls into a silence, but not an awkward one at that. Beomgyu is sitting on the bed, scrolling through his phone, not bothering to unpack, leaving his luggage out on the room’s aisle.

“What plans do we have today?” you ask, sitting down on the floor to get comfortable, ready to unpack. You have planned to iron all your clothes that need to be at once, organising your beauty products and choices of outfit, knowing Beomgyu would always give you very little time to get ready.

“I still think we have to go out at least for dinner, if you want to then we can go for more activities afterwards,” he replies, realising it’s almost time for dinner. You contemplate a bit before saying you would rather just eat dinner and head back to the room to take enough rest so tomorrow will be used efficiently.

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

The dinner was good, you have missed the original Japanese cuisine taste and the place that Beomgyu took you set the bar so high you could not wait for more meals here. He’s keeping the whole trip plans secret from you, you struggled picking outfit for dinner since he wouldn’t tell you what vibe the restaurant is.

Almost 10 pm, the perfect time for both of you to unwind and get plenty of sleep to explore the next day. Beomgyu is taking a shower while you take your time to remove your makeup, waiting for him to be done. As you tie your hair in a bun to get ready, Beomgyu steps outside the bathroom, the only thing that keeps his form from being totally nude is the bathrobe. You clear your throat awkwardly, not used to seeing this side of him as you step in the bathroom. Beomgyu remains calm, the small towel in his hands working diligently to help dry his hair.

“Is there a hairdryer?” he asks, just before you close the door.

“Uh, there is. At the dresser.”

After hearing him says thank you, you shut the door before clicking it. It feels weird to see your best friend, the one you have known since forever looking that hot with only a bathrobe on and wet hair. Shaking off your thoughts, you opted for a warm shower to help relieve your fatigue, taking your sweet time to shower. After fifteen minutes, you wear the pajamas in the bathroom, not comfortable enough to show more skin to Beomgyu to not make the situation more awkward.

When you get out, Beomgyu is already laying down on one side of the bed, he’s watching a movie using his tablet with dim lights. You turn on the vanity’s light, applying your night routine carefully. After all is done, you sit still on the chair, looking back and forth between him and the space he left you on the bed.

“Aren’t you sleeping?” Beomgyu questions so suddenly your shoulders jolt a little at his voice. You look at him through the mirror, he’s sitting on the bed now, the movie paused.

“Yeah, I was wondering what time I should wake up tomorrow,” you mumble a random excuse before standing up, turning off the vanity’s light and heading towards the bed.

Beomgyu waits for you to lay down beside him, tucking you in the same comforter as him. “Sorry, forgot to ask for an extra one. Do you need it?”

“That’s alright. It’s big enough for us to share,” you dismiss his offer, not wanting to make him call the hotel’s service late at night.

“What about the pillows? Are they okay? You want one of mine?” he offers and you chuckle before shaking your head.

“I’m fine. You should go to sleep as well.”

Beomgyu says he will after the movie ends, you are left blinking and shifting uncomfortably. Beomgyu just let it pass through for the first ten minutes, thinking you are probably uncomfortable in the bed other than yours at home. But you are constantly avoiding his eye contact, turning your back to him that he can’t seem to ignore.

“Y/n, are you okay? Why do you look uncomfortable?”

“Nah, I’m okay.” You stop shifting, settling onto your back, watching the dark ceiling with wide eyes. His movie is still playing in low volume but Beomgyu is more attracted to you.

“It has been so long since we last slept on the same bed,” you say in a slow voice, almost going inaudible to him. He pauses the movie, exiting from Netflix and places the tablet on the side table, deciding to continue watching it tomorrow.

“Sorry, it was so last minute I didn’t get to book another room for you,” he softly apologises, turning off the last light in the room, making the whole room appear dark, knowing you could only sleep with all lights out. He then gets comfortable to sleep, turning to face you.

“That’s okay. I’m just… it feels weird.” You quietly inch closer to him, letting the comforter engulf you. You can feel his body ghosting over your arms, reminding you that he’s super close to you right now. You take a deep breath before facing him, watching his eyelashes flutter so beautifully while looking at you. “Not in an uncomfortable way, though. We were only eighteen the last time I slept in your bed.”

Although it’s dark, you could see Beomgyu smiling at your words. As you appear beside him, his mind starts to wander all the moments before you both were forced to distance due to enrollment in different universities and right after finishing your study he got the news that you are getting engaged. It has been six years since then. You, his best friend, has grown up into a woman, a beautiful one at that, not the girl he feels like playing jokes on anymore.  The late-night talk everytime you come over, the shared giggles when he used to sleep over yours until your mom had to knock on your door to remind you guys to sleep, the times you have always been for each other every time needed. Each of the moments has him feeling a mixture of warmth and longing.

“How does it feel then?” he speaks after a few seconds of silence, one of his hands reaching to tug your hair behind your ears. Your heart skips a beat to have him this close, finding his features softened while waiting for your answer.

“You are like, the only man I ever slept on one bed with other than him. I mean the last time we slept on one bed, we were still kids, you were not this–good looking. It’s freaking me out,” you blurt out, almost face palming your own face for being too honest with him. You see his smile got wider by the compliment, thankful that it’s dark now or else he would see your blushing state.

“I know, must be nerve wrecking to sleep next to me huh?” he teases you, earning a playful slap on his arm before he lets out a small chuckle.

“Are you still with Luna?” you suddenly ask, curious about his last relationship that he told you about almost ten months ago. Beomgyu shakes his head, “No, we were just together for like a month. I don’t feel like continuing it, she was super cool about it too.”

“After her?”

“No one,” Beomgyu mumbles before yawning.

“Why?” you could not help but ask.

“Why can’t I? Do I need a reason to be single?”

“No… but you are so handsome it feels too good to be true if you are not with anyone,” you express your thoughts, Beomgyu smiling straight as he lets out a soft sigh, not replying anymore.

“But that might be better. I don’t think I can tolerate seeing you get hurt by wrong people too,” you admit, voice soft and filled with such care Beomgyu feels bittersweet about it. You always have so much love to give, it’s in your nature to always care for someone and make them your utmost priority and you would always not get the same energy back.

“I hope by the time we go back, I will not cry because of him again,” you promptly start, Beomgyu listening as he lets you ramble out your thoughts about him. Although he has heard it before from your mother, the story never gets old. Beomgyu still has yet to understand why and how he could do that to you. Each sentence you say seems to synchronise with Beomgyu’s soft breathing. In the darkness, only the moonlight shining through from the upper window translucency, you are opening up to him even more, finding it comfortable to have a deep talk with him, your one and only Beomgyu.

“Do you think I can heal again?” you take a moment, feeling sadness overtaking you. Beomgyu takes a moment to reply, his brows knitted as he moves closer and invites you in his arms. You pout in his embrace, mumbling a soft “I wanna be happy again.”

Beomgyu feels how his heart clenches instantly at your words, being the positive minded person that he is, now he’s in pain at the thought that you even had to think that you wanna be happy again. Happy, a feeling that Beomgyu feels easiest to have. Small things would always make him happy, and he rarely feels like he’s not happy. He would only probably be sad or upset for a couple of minutes before he’s back to his natural state. He can see your eyebags getting darker from lack of sleep and crying. He places a gentle hand on your head, taking the hair tie off for you to sleep comfortably, letting it sit on his wrist as he smooths out your hair.

“Well, I’m right here. You will be okay, just like when you fell down on your first bike ride, when you first got rejected, first broke up. You will heal again as long as I’m here,” he reassures you, pressing a small peck on your hair.

“You’re gonna make it through just like you have always been, I promise.” He’s now tapping your back softly, trying to lull you into sleepiness, hoping for the gentle tap to offer you comfort as well. After a while, he finally removes himself from you, your pouting lips evident as he pulls away from the hug.

“You think you can sleep now?” he asks you, petting your head for the nth time.

“Would it be okay if we cuddle to sleep?” you carefully urge, inciting a smile that reaches his dimple as he fixes the comforter and gets closer to you.

“Come here, you little nuisance.”

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

The next morning comes in a flash. You both had accidentally slept through until it’s almost 9 am, the sun blazes strong through the curtains that wakes you up. It’s been almost two weeks that you didn’t have proper sleep but with Beomgyu, you felt like yesterday you could let all your concerns go away and relax your mind. You wake up with a refreshed state of mind, smiling to yourself as you see Beomgyu sleeping so pretty with his lips parted. Not wanting him to wake up, you sneak out of the bed in silence before taking a morning shower.

Beomgyu takes you for brunch at a cafe that you once went to during your previous visit. Since the last time you stepped in, the cafe hadn’t changed that much. The warm atmosphere paired with a slow r&b playlist that blasts through the speaker providing you delightful emotion. To kill time whilst waiting for the food to be served, Beomgyu suggests playing 20 questions. Although you feel like you have known him enough to not be curious about anything, you agreed. 

“Who’s the prettiest girl you've ever dated?”

“That’s a very… unexpected question.”

“Come on, just say it’s Chaeyeon already.”

“Nah, not her. I have a different answer, though. I know the most pretty girl, but I haven’t had a chance to date her yet.”

“Who is it?”

“Ah-ah, no adding questions. It’s my turn.” Beomgyu smirks, crossing out the number 10 on the piece of random paper he finds in your sling bag, swiping through the strands of his hair to appear more presentable when he feels them poking his eyes. Before he could ask you the next question, the waiter arrives with your orders. You only stare at them both chatting in Japanese, catching a few simple words you know. They’re probably talking about the food. You mutter a small thank you in Japanese after the waiter sets everything on the table.

“I’d make you come with me to Japan everytime because you’re so good at speaking the language,” you chime in, fascinated everytime he sounds so confident and fluent in speaking it, although Beomgyu never had proper lessons. His self taught really shows the progress since he became more and more comfortable in speaking it with the locals, both your family always depending on him during your visit to the country.

“I’d come running if you want me to,” he jokes, pulling your plate of donkatsu towards him. You watch with both your hands placed under your chin, elbows on the table as he cuts the already cut fried batter into smaller pieces for you to have them in one bite easily. After making sure to place all the onions he knew you disliked from the dish into the corner, he pushes the plate towards you again. “Here angel, enjoy.”

“Thanks,” you smile, grabbing the chopsticks from him, and start digging in the food, appreciating the taste in silence. Small talks accompany your brunch here and there, him throwing in little jokes and funny stories as you prefer to listen and reply when you feel like it. Not long after his last bite, while taking a close look at you to wait for you to finish your food, his phone rings, the screen lighting up showing that your mom has called. You spontaneously laugh and ask him to be the one to pick up. It was a regular daily check up phone calls, her being worried about you and Beomgyu reassuring her that you are doing fine with him.

“She wants to talk to you,” Beomgyu hands over his phone to you, excusing himself to go to the toilet. You update your mother on the trip, telling her not to worry since you are more than happy to take your time away from everything, that Beomgyu is taking care of you very well, more than you would like him to and that you’ll be back into her arms happier than ever. After saying goodbyes and I love yous, you ended the call.

The phone remains unlocked and you stumble upon the notification that suddenly pops up from his reminder. It is a reminder that says ‘Y/nie’s wedding day’. You feel a rush of emotions from it, smiling bitterly at the thought that it could be the best day of your life, but now you are here, in Japan, eating brunch in a random cafe on the supposed day of your wedding date. You tap on the Reminder, dismissing it. Your eyes then fall on the note of the reminder, a small sentence that was most likely written by him.

No matter how much I deny it, this day has come.

Before you could interpret what he means, you spot Beomgyu coming with light steps. You quickly delete the recent app from his phone before handing it back to him. He puts it in the back pocket of his pants.

“Everything okay? I paid already,” he tells you, gently pushing your bangs to the back and fixing the beanie you had on your head. You softly smile at him, not replying to him as you both thank the staff at the exit. You put on your coat again as you walk out from the cafe.

“Ready for the next plan?” Beomgyu stretches his hand towards you, offering you to hold his hand as you place your smaller hand in his hesitantly.

“Sure.”

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

“Is it just me or are things a little awkward between us today?” Beomgyu states, taking off his sneakers and placing them in place before following you inside. You fake a laugh, stripping the beanie from your head and putting them on the dressing table.

“What do you mean? Nothing’s awkward? Like, at all! We’re, like, having so much fun today. What could be awkward about that?” You try to sound convincing, making eye contact with him before turning away after two seconds. You clear your throat, taking off the coat and hanging it on your side of the wardrobe, avoiding his intense gaze.

“Everything about that was awkward,” Beomgyu voices out. You have been acting differently since he went to the toilet after the meal. Did your mother say anything you don’t like? Beomgyu can’t help but to overthink as you remain quiet the whole time you guys were in the public transport, going on thrilling rides in the theme park Universal Studios Japan. Of course, he would always be the one to talk much more than you, but your lack of responses and smile is beginning to fluster him.

“Do you not like what I planned today? Do you want anything to eat, perhaps?” Beomgyu questions in doubt, afraid that the rides he made you ride has significantly affects your mood. You ignore his interrogation, making your way until he’s eye to eye with you.

“Gyu do you have like, anything, to tell me?”

Beomgyu raises his eyebrows at the question, sitting at the edge of the bed with you standing in front of him. He’s equally confused, seeing you so serious, not an inch of smile or playfulness present in your expression.

“No? I don’t get what you’re talking about.” He watches as you exhale a sharp breath, shaking your head while looking down before looking at him again. “Why?”

“Oh, nothing,” you quickly dismiss him, trying to get it out of your mind. Ignoring his burning stare that will most probably shoot a hole into you, you get ready to unfold from the long day. He probably doesn’t remember about it anymore, you give yourself assurance.

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

On the second night there, you manage to persuade him to go to a bar for a few drinks. Beomgyu was half-hearted at first, he was afraid that neither of you would be on guard, and that he values your safety the most. A few tug here and there, Beomgyu finally gives in, “Not more than what you can take, promise?”

You quickly agree, promising that you are only going to drink to empty your mind from the thoughts. Beomgyu, being understanding as he ever was, has no word to deny you. Going out, sitting in the table for two right at the corner to have some privacy, you start off with not so strong alcohol, Beomgyu only taking a sip or two to keep himself cautious. A couple of shots later, your cheeks flushed with crimson now. As the night deepens, it becomes apparent to him that you are a lightweight, becoming more giggly and saying the most teeth rotting things to him.

“Y’know wha—I’ve always thought you were th’handsomest person around.”

It’s hard to ignore your compliments, Beomgyu set his mind up that it's all drunk thought of yours, it’s definitely alcohol taking in your system and you most probably will forget what you say to him tonight and you might not even mean any of it.

He watches as you snort and cover your small mouth as you laugh at something. “Come on, drink more! Your lip looks like it’s thirsty, f’drink or f’me?!” You end your sentence with a laugh again, your hair all messy from the bun that you had on since afternoon. Shaking his head with a slight smile, Beomgyu raises his hand to call for the waiter as he notices you aren’t drinking much anymore, instead having your face down on the table. He pays for the drink, his hands tenderly pushing your hair that is sticking to your face, helping you to get into a low ponytail to not hurt your scalp. He then gets your sling bag, putting it on his own shoulder, making you wear one of your sandals that flew away from your feet before.

“Come, let’s go back now.”

Your footsteps are unstable as you try to balance yourself on your own two feet, Beomgyu catching your right arm to help you stand straight. Without thinking straight, you bury your face on his chest, hugging his waist. The corner of his lips rising as he appreciates how clingy you become when you are wasted.

“What a nice, huh, nice tits you have,” you remark suddenly, forcing a choked laugh to come out from him as he feels your hand tracing around his clothed chest.

“You having fun, angel?” he asks as he presses a small peck on your hair, unable to contain himself from leaving a few more there with you cuddled up in his embrace.

“So much,” you giggle as you look up to him, his breath tickling your nose before Beomgyu is taken aback when you kiss him once on the jaw. The action gives butterflies in his stomach as he stares into your eye that is boring into his.

“Y’re so handsome, Gyu… just standing by yourself,” you say in low voice, your fingers tracing the area of his lips as your eyelids become more drowsy. “Holding my bag f’me, so sweet and nice.” You glance at the pink strap of your bag on his shoulder, the colour completely contrasting with his army green jacket, inciting yet another cute giggle from you that Beomgyu can’t help but pet your hair seeing your adorable state.

“’m so stupid,” you express, yawning once before snuggling into his warmth again. “Could’ve been with ya ’stead of him.”

Silence.

“Mom likes him s’much she forgot to look at you. Even more–a lot handsome. Tall too. Don’t get why I agree to marry him when you look this good,” you add, feeling so vulnerable and tired as you take a long and deep breath before sinking into his chest.

Beomgyu thinks you are talking nonsense. He remembers that most drunk people would never mean what they say, yet his heart feels content hearing you say that to him. Although you aren’t conscious now, he will treasure this night the most. The rest of the supposed ten minutes walk to your hotel becomes an almost forty minutes walk, you stopping here and there and he patiently waits as you talk to random flowers, benches and poles before whining at the lack of response, losing interest and following his steps.

“Can’t stop touchin’ you,” you whimper as both of you step into the room, squirming in his touch as your hand grabbing his jacket to pull him closer. Beomgyu’s grip on your waist remains intact, turning his head a little before you could land your lips on his, you pouting at his behaviour.

“You don’t like me?” you ask, teary eyed before Beomgyu quickly shakes his head. “No angel, I like you, I like you so much.”

“Then why wouldn’t you kith–kith me?” you become more whiny, desperate for even a slight peck on his inviting lips. “Am I not pretty ’nuf f’you?”

“No, angel, baby, don’t–don’t say that.” He shuts the door behind him, making sure the lock is secured for the night. You run to the bed, not bothering to take off your sandal as you sit with the biggest pout on your lips. Your legs hanging off the bed, Beomgyu sighs before he's bending down to take both your sandals off your feet and putting it away. “Drunk or not, always my little nuisance.”

“Gyu,” you call for him softly, making him lean in closer to you, standing at the edge of the bed in front of you, ruffling your already messy hair as he replies with a soft hum.

"What am I... to you?" Your question almost made him wide awake despite being so sleepy, the clock now showing the time almost 12 in the midnight, in a sense as you look at him in the eyes.

“Angel, my precious Y/nie. Always.” His tone indicates the seriousness, contrasting with such a cheeky smile he has on his face right now, the nickname flowing through his lips sounded so beautiful to your ears.

“I had a crush on you when we were sixteen,” you start, Beomgyu listening closely although he swears his heart is gonna explode when you tell him about that. “Did you know I love you s’much?” you ask, unknowingly making Beomgyu’s heart ache both in pain and in delight.

“Don’t play with me like that, angel.”

You ignore his words, putting your thumb finger on his lips to shut him up. “’m sorry it took me so long to say it, didn’t have the chance to say it ’cause you were dating so many girls that wasn’t me,” you pause, rubbing your eyes for a bit as you feel your vision getting more and more blurry. Once you focus back on his handsome face, you smile again.

“I liked you. A lot, actually. Had a whole box filled with handwritten letters that I wrote for you, yet none of ’em reaches you. You were–are so attractive. I had those stupid feelings for you. I actually used to pray to heaven errday that I wish you’d see me more than friends,” you let the whole thing off your chest, being very honest about your unrequited feelings back then. Your words slightly slurred due to your small hiccups here and there but the sincere message sent across him perfectly.

“You were always, very, so nice to me. I imagined if we were more than this, but I don’t want to risk losing our friendship, you are so precious to me, don’t wanna lose you forever over my stupid crush.”

Beomgyu is still shocked by the sudden confession, although he is keeping himself from being excited because you mentioned the crush being years ago. He saw how heartbroken you were when your ex-fiancé cheated on you, that you most probably have no feelings for him by now. You look at him with honesty in your eyes, despite the alcohol intake you still manage to shake his heart in ways any other girl could not.

“I have always seen you more than friends, Gyu. I wanna be your only girl s’bad, but couldn’t risk it all, I engaged with him to move on from you, it’s ’cause I know you don’t feel the same way.” The way you end your sentence makes him watch you with attentiveness. He takes in your appearance, cheeks becoming more and more red, you are probably still shy to confess even when you are this wasted, eye makeup already smudged, your lipstick staining your chin a bit yet you are glowing so beautifully it makes him ache. You are so beautiful, so close yet so out of reach, and you are so pretty but you are not even his.

“Y/n, baby, thank you for being honest. We can talk about this when you are sober, huh?” he softly pats your head, cupping your cheek before you break away from his touch.

You shake your head furiously. “Not drunk, Gyu. Please–listen!” you raise your tone, feeling annoyed at how he keeps on not taking you seriously.

“Truth is, he never really makes me happy like you do. He won’t do stupid things you’d do when I ask him to, can’t even hold me to sleep and expects me to be a good fiancée to him,” you tell him with a wide set of eyes. The drowsiness suddenly went away as you reflected on your relationship with him that had more sad than happy moments. “I’m sorry that I fell for him, shud keep my feelings only for you.”

Before he could process what you said, you continued, “Don’t want him anymore. Want you ’stead,” you confess, standing up and pushing him to sit in your place. Your delicate fingers touching his lips again, eyes looking into his with silent plead that sound loud to his ears. You stay like that for a while, Beomgyu’s head flooding with thoughts that he shouldn’t let you do this, since he’s not sure whether you will regret it or not tomorrow.

“Angel…”

“Please, Beomie.”

The nickname that you haven’t used on him for years pinching his heart so softly, taking him to the times you were closer than ever years ago. He takes a sharp breath, evident to your ears to be shaky as he holds your hand.

“I don’t want you to regret this in the morning,” he explains to you in the softest tone ever, but still manages to make you pout in frustration.

“Please, just this once, why would I regret it if it's you?” you try to affirm him, watching him hesitantly let go of your hand, placing his hand on your waist instead, engulfing your smaller frame into his bigger one.

“Should we keep you in this state, angel? We can wait until you are sober if you really want to, I promise I won’t deny you anything you wanna do to me,” Beomgyu says in his last attempt to stop you, but as expected you shake your head right after he finished his sentence.

“Don’t want to be sober, would not have the courage.”

Beomgyu stays still as he quietly agree with your reasoning. You push the bangs of his backward, presenting you with the view of his forehead, filling your heart with fluffiness as you are this close to him you can see every flutter of his eyelashes. “Can I kiss you, Beomie?”

“Y/n I–” Beomgyu’s voice is cut off, preparing himself as you suddenly sit on his lap, glancing at him while doing so. At last, he welcomes you with both hands on your waist, saying the magic words with a voice above a whisper, “Okay, y/n. You ask so nicely. Can’t deny my angel anymore.”

Your lips drop into a smile, waiting for a few seconds before slowly leaning in, pressing your lips against his, one hand holding his hair softly and the other tracing the muscles on his shoulder while he just holds you closer. The way his lips feel on yours has your head spinning while your stomach churned with happiness. He was craving you too, evident in his passionate kiss.

His hands wander around your thighs, shifting you onto a more comfortable place on his lap without even breaking the kiss, then he places his hands on the back of your neck, pulling you even closer. You let out a whimper against his lips as he squeezed your back, gripping his hair before finally pulling away, breathing heavily.

"Y/n,” he speaks with a firm voice, eyes scanning you. You keep the same eye contact on him confidently as he continues, "I have to warn you that if we kiss one more time, I won't be able to stop myself. The decision is yours, Y/n. We either go to sleep or continue. You choose."

You nod your head, contemplating whether or not it would be a good idea to sleep with someone in your current state. Then again, it is him, not just random 'someone'. You trust him with all your heart. You have never felt uncomfortable with him, and you are more than certain he would take such good care of you just like how he promised your mother when you guys went to highschool on the very first day as a freshman there. With that, you crush your lips against his again, wrapping your legs around his waist. And then the smell of him becomes even more intoxicating, along with the fact that he is so close to you.

Beomgyu feels your hot breath hitch as the hold he has on your waist becomes more secure, automatically becoming more turned on when he feels your core sitting on his clothed crotch, wriggling on it. Your lips constantly finds his, feeling them to be so inviting, warm and sickeningly sweet against yours like a drug, pushing you deeper into his tempting infatuation.

Your hand goes to his crotch, softly squeezing it that brings Beomgyu's kiss to a halt. He eyes you that has your gaze fixed on him, lips a bit plump after the make out. “Oh–fuck, baby, you can't do that and expect me to not lose control.”

“You're hard already, Gyu,” your honey voice whispers to his ear, taking him to a bliss of pleasure as you sweetly kiss his neck next, decorating it with your mark. Beomgyu lets you take all the time in the world you want, appreciating your beauty as he unties your hair, watching closely at how your hair falls on one side of your shoulder when you plant another mark on his jaw.

Beomgyu stares at your pretty face that most likely will be more pretty when you come undone around him and so he unbuttons your blouse slowly, you letting out a few soft moans when his fingers are now touching your bare skin underneath the shirt. Beomgyu is no different, looking at you in awe as he leans in to tell you how pretty, perfect and sexy you are. He runs a hand around your back, rubbing it with such care before unclasping your bra, helping you undo them and place them aside. Your chest heaves up and down as his thumb finds your nipple, cheeks turning into a brighter pink at the intimacy.

“So pretty,” he says in a hushed tone, softly beginning to massage them as you feel your entire body heats up under his intimidating stare, yet unable to break eye contact. “You feel good, angel?”

“Y-yes, Gyu. Feels s’good.”

Beomgyu hums in amusement, his hands now placed on your back again, lifting you up as you huff in surprise before he's lying you down on the bed. You take in his full appearance when he hovers on top of you, careful not to press any unpleasant weight on you.

“You comfy, angel?” he does not forget to ask, gently supporting your head with one hand before slipping a pillow under it to ensure you are landing your head on a soft area. You nod as a reply, waiting for him to lean in and kiss your cheek, his hand travelling around your body that makes you shiver in goosebump due to the difference between the cold air and his warmth.

“Y're such handsome,” you voice out, hands cupping his cheek. A smile appears on your face when your hand comes up to trace his pointy nose and eyes, unintentionally closing his eyes at your finger that touches his eyelid.

“Bright eyes. Handsome nose. Please, please, can you be mine, my boyfriend?”

You look even more adorable, making Beomgyu's heart race at the endearing statement. “Be sober when you want to ask me that, you lightweight,” he chuckles when he tells you that, only receiving a sheepish smile on your end.

“Hurry up, want you,” you stop smiling suddenly, lips twitching in frustration ever since he denied you for so long. He pulls his pants and underwear down, kicking it from his feet until it lands on the floor.

“Angel, y/n, we don't have to do this, wherever the night ends I still love you either way,” he informs, tapping his fingers on your rib with care as he waits patiently for your counter or consent. You wrap your hands around his neck, leaving a peck on his nose tip as you say, “I want it.”

“You sure, baby? We can stop anytime,” he mutters in between connecting your lips together in a hot kiss. You moan his name and encourage him to continue. As he takes in the cue, he swiftly unzips your skirt, sliding it down your legs before his eyes are met with your lacy white panties, taking his breath away for a moment.

“Is it okay if I take this off too?”

You blush at his words, breath becoming more shaky as his fingers are now toying with the waistband of the little clothing. You then nod your head, telling him a confident please do. He does just that, carefully pressing on your clit once it comes into view. You can feel his fingers rubbing on your slit, your breath hitching as he inserts one of them in, drawing out a louder moan from you.

“Tell me if I did something you don't like, okay angel? You have to promise me that.”

You moan pathetically and nod your head a few times. “Feels good, Beomie. Please, more. Can I have more–oh,” your words are cut off as he inserts another one, fingering you in a scissoring method as he feels your walls opening up to him little by little. You have your hand on his chest, holding on to him as your anchor.

“Not enough, Gyu. Please, want your cock inside,” you beg for him, voice so stomach-churning to him as he hears your vulgar words for the first time. He positions himself on your entrance, you nodding to him as he glances on your face first for agreement.

Your grip on his shoulder becomes more firm as he slowly starts to fill you. Tears prickling at your eyes at the pleasurable pain, hugely turning him on even more that he has to remind himself to be gentle with you and not force himself in entirely in one go. Your velvety hole envelopes him in warmth, wet enough for him to start thrusting slowly until his dick sits entirely in you after a few seconds.

“You doing okay, angel?” He stills himself, smiling smugly as he observes you taking your breath to adjust to his size. Your eyes flutter shut for a few seconds, the stung lasting for a minute but he is patient enough to let you adjust, stroking your hair and pecking your lips a few times before you look at him again and signals him you're good to go. He starts with an easy pace, glancing at your expression to find if there's any discomfort in them and when he's sure you're alright, he takes one of your thighs in his hand, bending them a bit as you moan at the slight angle change. He keeps the steady pace for a while before he grows needy and starts pounding into you harder and faster.

His tip reaches your spot in no time, with his constant praises and vulgar words, your body shakes with sob that you let out as you feel the shape of his dick moulding into you perfectly.

You let out whines of his name, with your toes curling as you feel your first orgasm of the night building rapidly. Beomgyu then leans forward to flush his lips on yours that you accept with a choked moan, fingers locking with his as he increases the pace, his cock going deeper into your cunt so much you could feel it poking to your cervix. You let go of the kiss, moaning out his name louder.

At the increased sensation your hands go flying to grab a fistful of his hair, making him groan in slight ache. His tip keeps on pushing on your sweet spot as you feel it approaching.

“I'm—I'm close, hah,” you cry out, hips bucking to meet his thrust, Beomgyu encouraging you with soft sighs. “Let go, angel. I got you.”

He keeps on pushing you to the edge, eyes focusing on the wetness that drapes around his cock every time he pulls out and in, making him dizzy with so much pleasure. His eyes dart into your face, watching you shut your eyes in a buzz of satisfying desire. As you become even more whiny as your release approaches, he works his fingers skilfully to move around your clit.

Your grip on his dick becomes impossibly tight as you unravel on him, your release accompanied with a low scream of his name forming from your mouth. The feeling of you clenching on him so much triggering his own orgasm, bursting his own release inside you.

“Hah, baby, so good,” he’s unable to contain his own moans, the pure bliss of finishing getting through his head. His hips stutters before stilling completely, scanning your state that is completely wrecked underneath him, sweaty and chest heaving up and down in search of proper breathe, but still manage to look like a goddess to him.

He then lets his lips attack your forehead, whispering praises into your ear before fluttering your whole body with kisses, your giggles filling the room as you are bombarded with tingling senses. Beomgyu can't help but to break into laughter too, cherishing the moments with you as you both cuddle into each other for a bit.

With eyes full of care, love and joy he stares into your eye that probably shares the same feeling although it looks slightly droopy than before as he pulls out his softened cock from you, initiating a low voiced whine to come up from you.

“You wanna go to sleep, baby?” he asks, noticing how you seem like floating in between awake and doze. You answer, “Sure,” with a dulcet tone right away, pulling him to lie down beside you, letting your body be welcomed with his embrace. You close your eyes, mind filled with nothing but happiness as you drift off to sleep.

Beomgyu stays with you for a while, letting you doze off on his chest with his stable breaths as he appreciates the silence that falls into the room. He has you in his arms, adorably squished cheeks against his bare chest, while reminiscing your sudden confession and lovely demeanour that ignites an euphoric feeling inside him. He waits for the night to deepen before cleaning up both of you, careful to not wake you up. As the clock strikes at 2, Beomgyu lays down on the bed, you feeling the shifting on it moves around and finds his warmth again, Beomgyu accepting you in his embrace with full pleasure, pecking your forehead a few times before he drifts off to dreamland not too long after.

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

Beomgyu has forgotten the plans he’d made with you today–a breakfast at a local sushi restaurant. He realises that both of you are running late by the time he has woken up, the sunshine peeking through in your shared room too bright for it to be early morning. He’s outside now, leaving the hotel room, making sure it’s safely locked from inside for your safety after taking his sweet time to admire your sleeping form, the comforter you are snuggling with being the only thing that covers your naked form, reminding himself that it was all real. He doesn't even care to shower in case he wakes you up with the noise. The stride in the nearest park certainly is not in any of his plans, but he thought that it was needed for him to relax from yesterday’s event. He supposed that he would need some time to think after having sex–with his best friend.

He does not expect to run into you immediately as he enters the hotel room after an hour of walking with no direction, his hands occupied with a packed soup and medicine to cure your hangover. But he accepts the confrontation, taking you in with a smile. A warmth feeling spreads through his chest as he walks towards your pouting form.

“You are up,” he says with his usual cheeky tone, putting down the bags of soup and medicine on the dining table, making his way to you to caress your head. “Is your head okay? I bought painkillers and soup for you.”

“Where did you go?” you question him, eyes longing for honesty before your lips fall into a pout again. “Woke up without you, don't even have my phone and don't know how to speak to anyone here.”

Beomgyu lets out a laugh hearing your cute complaints. He ruffles your hair a bit, pinching your right cheek playfully. “I just had a morning walk, angel. Never leaving you.”

You sigh in defeat, eyes peering at the bags on the table. “What's for breakfast?”

“I bought soup for you,” he repeats in patience, taking your hand in his to sit you down at the small dining area in the hotel, sitting down beside you afterwards. He unwraps the packaging for you, stirring the soup slightly before handing you the spoon. “Come on, eat.”

“What are you eating?” you choose to ask first, him shrugging his shoulders. “I don't know. Was supposed to come with you to a restaurant but we passed the reservation time already. Should I get room service?”

“That's a good idea. We have a lot to talk about anyway.”

With your encouragement, he makes an order, you eating your first bite with his voice speaking Japanese to the hotel worker through phone in the background. After putting down the phone, he sits next to you again, watching you eat in silence.

“Do you remember what happened yesterday?”

“Yup, vividly.”

With your reply, Beomgyu hesitates his next words a bit. He wants to ask you if you meant what you said yesterday, whether you think that was all a mistake or that it was all drunk thoughts. Seeing him flinching in his own seat, you muster up your courage to start first.

“I wasn't kidding yesterday,” you start, eyes boring into the scenery outside the 16th floor. “I really was in love with you when we were in highschool. It might explain why I had so many flings yet none of them last more than a week. It was because I found the lack of feelings I had for you in all those relationships. I tried to see if anyone could make me feel those butterflies I have when I'm around you.”

Beomgyu listens in, his mind remembering your highschool era, the memory in the back of his mind slowly becomes more clear the more you unveil the truth. His fingers fidgets with the material of his pants, feeling nervousness overpowering him as he lets you continue.

“I think I slowly started to forget the crush I had on you when we were in university. The distance at that time makes it easier for me, I was also focusing on studying so much since I want to graduate on time,” you add, taking another sip of the soup as you feel his gaze fixed on you.

“But it doesn't go away just like that. By the time I graduated, I realised I just let it bury deep inside, never fully moved on because when mom and dad engaged me to him, I felt upset it wasn't you.” You now put the spoon down, leaning on the chair in a straight posture, ready to give rise to a proper talk.

“I had to accept their choice right away since you started to talk to Luna, and I think you liked her so much your eyes glisten with so much hope whenever you talk about her.”

The shift in your voice that starts to sound more hurt, enacting his uneasiness. He stays calm and collected as you continue, “I think it wasn't love with him, I just feel he is someone I can trust, someone I can cure my loneliness since we have tied the knots by engagement, and that certainly wasn't how he sees me either since he cheated.” You feel disgusted for a bit, feeling gross at how your ex behaves around you, and how you try to make him replace Beomgyu. Your Beomgyu…

Your lips tremble with overwhelming sadness that spreads even more as you continue your words, “I want you to know that I don't regret what happened between us last night, instead I should be the one's sorry to you. I understand if you feel uncomfortable, if you want to stop being friends, if you want me out of–”

“Shh, angel. What are you saying?” he interrupts, hand reaching out to hold yours in his, worry forming inside as he stares at your watery eyes.

“I'm sorry, I have made you uncomfortable. We can–we can forget about it if you want,” you urgently continue, unable to control your tears anymore as they spill.

“Y/n baby, no, none of that,” he claims, his step quick to pull you in a hug, your tears once again wetting his shirt yet he cares less. He holds you close to him, the familiar scent and home-y feeling calming you down as your tears stop when you feel him kissing your forehead.

“Angel, do you want to sit and listen to me first?” he calmly suggests, you nodding your head with flushed cheek making him smile in content. He walks backward to the bed with you in his arms, his bottom landing on the soft sheets before he pulls you to sit on his lap. As you sit eye to eye with him, he coos at your wet face with tears, softly rubbing his thumb to dry them. “What an angel, she even cries pretty.”

His words draw confusion in your expression, eyebrows furrowing as you wait for him to continue.

“About last night, me too, I didn't regret it even a little bit,” he announces in ease, holding your waist that seems to fit perfectly in his arms, initiating another smile from his lips that looks very charming to you right now. “I think I like you too, y/n.”

Your mouth hangs open, surprised at the statement as you hit him on the shoulder. “Choi Beomgyu, it's not time to joke around.”

“I'm not,” he chuckles, the happiness on his face too captivating and attractive for you to consider him as a platonic friend anymore. “I really think I do like you. And what's with the government name? I wanna be called Gyu or Beomie only!”

You ignore his tantrum, hesitating fingers come up to hold his face. “But, are you serious? How? Why? Why me?”

"Too long to explain. I would just answer, yes. You. Yes, I like you. I've always liked you, you idiot! Who doesn't like you? You're so... pretty. Smart too. Always lovely, you accept my jokes and pranks wholeheartedly, laugh and make fun of me when I fall yet be the one to put the bandage on my wound with such care. It feels wonderful to be with you, and I don't think I can find anyone else I can love just how I love you."

The unanticipated confessions generates a wave of emotions in you, mixed with gratefulness, joy, relief, excitement and most importantly fondness of love as you take in the fact that you no longer have to crave for anyone's love but him. With him, it feels complete. It's reciprocated. It's mutual. Your lips tremble with being emotionally touched that you feel like crying again but you stop yourself and instead flash him a smile.

“Why didn't you tell me?” you ask, still in denial with all that comes forward from your drinking. It all feels too good to be true, you feel like you are in a fairytale where the happy ending is becoming more and more transparent.

“Because I can't afford to lose a cutie like you from my life,” he states his answer, booping your nose with his that forms a whole zoo in your stomach. “If you do not feel the same then I would just die out of sadness.”

You giggle in ecstasy, pleased to have him deliver the truth on you, and something that has been lingering on your mind suddenly erupts through, you calling him as he hums back with a gentle squeeze on your waist.

“Can you explain to me about the notes on your reminder?”

“What reminder, angel?”

You ask him for his phone, he struggles a bit pulling out the device from his pocket as you are sitting on his lap but neither of you move, and rather laugh at the silliness. Unlocking his phone on your own that has the same password since you were in middle school, you show him the reminder that you dismissed from the other day. Looking at the note, Beomgyu's smile widens as he pecks your lips once, leaving the lingering feeling of love from the sudden kiss.

“It means what it is, angel. Was never happy to see you engaged to another man that wasn't me,” he finally affirms, clearing your doubt and suddenly you feel lighter again. You feel like you are floating in cloud nine, elated as your smile grows bigger, causing Beomgyu to lose it at your gorgeous face so he showers you with kisses all over your face and neck, making you laugh out loud at the tickles.

“We're so stupid, aren't we?” you say, still feeling funny at how it all crashes down from communication and honesty.

“You're a bit more stupid than me, that I agree,” he jokes, receiving a hit on his shoulder as he dramatically screams in pain before laughing, tackling you on the bed and tickling you until you are short of breath, but still happy.

ִ ࣪𖤐⋆⭒˚.⋆

“I can't believe we really are back in Korea with you smiling,” Beomgyu utters as he walks hand in hand with you at the airport, heading towards where your luggage will be sorted and returned. “Mission accomplished! Although it ends with me ending my single life…”

“Let's break up then,” you jokingly trigger him, enunciating a whine from him as he stops walking, taking you in his arms and capture your lips together in apology. “No, no. Not letting my angel away from me anymore.”

You both squat down waiting for your luggage to come, creating a confused look from other people at the airport but it feels like they're the one living in you and Beomgyu's world that you both didn't care of any stigmas or weird looks you are receiving right now.

“Do you think we’ll be in love forever?”

“As long as you want us to be, angel. I can actually see me putting a ring on your finger, having our own child and growing old together with you,” Beomgyu says in a charming voice, the seriousness in his words that differs from his usual playful character launching all sorts of love synonyms in your heart, beating like crazy due to his sweet words. You relax your stare on him, intoxicated by love from his enchantingly pure affection.

“I think mom will like you more than him, anyways,” you tell him, smiling as you can't wait to tell her everything, that your crush on him is reciprocated, that all nights you and your mom spend talking about your crush on him and her crushes during her teenage years all comes into a fruitful end. You're not gonna tell Beomgyu that though, let your mother be the one who tells him about your crush on him during your teenage years.

“Oh, let's not get our hopes too high, baby. I made her daughter cry so many times when she was little, she probably still thinks I'm bullying you into becoming my girlfriend,” Beomgyu scoffs, remembering how strict of a lady she is whenever she demands him to say sorry to you. He then makes a note on his mind to come clean of your relationship to your mother with a proper plan, maybe bringing her a bouquet of flowers that she likes or gifting her a new set of pots of her favourite brand.

You laugh, excited for what more to unfold as Beomgyu runs forward when he sees both your luggage, again, being a gentleman to carry it for you to get back home. You think you can adapt to his new side, he's not just a best friend anymore, but also a boyfriend. Your eyes peek at the matching bracelet on his wrist then on yours, that you got in Japan which has a tiny moonstone on it, recalling Beomgyu's explanation that it symbolises light and hope, also to accept new beginnings. The symbolism is perfect as you cannot wait to see what more to unfold with this new story of yours.

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the beomgyu fic is coming soon 😉

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how do we feel of arranged marriage au with maybe... soobin 🫣

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it’s so frustrating if i wanna save a draft and it takes forever to load and i don’t have the copy of it anywhere

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idk but it's funny how my fics will always have long title hahah txt's lore everywhere including moablr 😭

[healingpage]

[healingpage] works in progress.

TO BE RELEASED (COMPLETED + WAITING TO BE POSTED)

࣪𖤐 when the home holds you - csb - oneshot - posting 19/12

established r/s au | fluff

࣪𖤐 not made of glass - csb - oneshot - posting xx/12

established r/s au | smut

UPCOMING FICS

𐙚 dangerous desires (and i'll buy you the world) - cyj - series

writing》planning》outlining

fwb/sugar daddy au | smut, fluff, angst

yeonjun and y/n met in an unusual way, with them ending up in a complicated intimate relationship but there is one rule—no strings attached. what will happen when one of them breaks the rule and wants out of the relationship, but another wants to stay because they feel the same and still wants to be around them?

𐙚 untitled - kth - oneshot

writing》outlining》planning

exes to lovers au, second chances au | angst, smut

no summary yet

𐙚 untitled - kkh - oneshot

writing》outlining》planning

sk&er boy inspired au, idol!hyuka

no summary yet

𐙚 untitled - cyj - oneshot

writing》outlining》planning

established relationship, mafia theme au

no summary yet

i have no schedule for any of my fics. i will get them done at my own pace, and i mainly work on them slowly but in bursts whenever my writer block is gone. the chances ALL OF THEM are going to be posted is likely 100% but i have no promise to when it will be. if you have question or anything you wanna say about my wips, don’t be shy to drop by my ask!

☆ 2024 healingpage - created 06.03.24 - last update 16.12.24

since 2023

[healingpage]

you’re writing is soooo prettyyyyy. I read your beomgyu fic a couple of weeks ago. You captured his personality so perfectly . Looking forward to ur new fic

omg anon??? you’re so sweet thank you so much 😭 and yes i write the upcoming fic with his personality so much in my mind! i wanna get my own real life beomie too :((