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I hope they’re lurking and they see this. I dare you to interact.

god, you ask your irl friends of 7 years for their tumblr usernames and suddenly you’re the enemy

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god, you ask your irl friends of 7 years for their tumblr usernames and suddenly you’re the enemy

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god, you ask your irl friends of 7 years for their tumblr usernames and suddenly you’re the enemy

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“Why does it feel like there’s a fog between my brain and the meaning of this sentence” this is a brand new occurrence, never before seen. I think I’ll call it “brain fog”

"Why am I so fatigued" sometimes I forget I literally have the fatigue disease or something.

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You know, rivers catching on fire used to be a regular occurrence.

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Teenage me was tumblr’s target audience but too shy to try. Adult me is ready to be an absolute fool.

“Fyp” we don’t do that here. I mean, Tumblr the app and website tries, but we don't do that here.

“But then how will anyone see it?” peer review.

“How do you get engagement?” by talking and engaging with other people. Or making a devastating typo. Either way.

“But—” Listen, you’re not doing solo stand up anymore. This is a group improv class being held in a SAW dungeon. Good luck.

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“Humans are inherently selfish--" Then why do so many cultures value hospitality, to the point of dictating it in their religions? Why is it so common for hosts to offer their visitors their best food, and as much of it as they can? At some point, multiple cultures decided that they knew what it felt like to be alone and vulnerable, and promised each other to never let those who stay with them feel that way. That doesn't sound very "inherently selfish" to me.

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hey did you guys know that if you constantly get sent to secondary screening at the airport, it might mean you’re on a TSA watchlist? haha what a funny random fact

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shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

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okay so i finished checking if we were friends in every universe and, uh, it turns out we're only friends in 6 of them. but look, i need you to understand these universes vary like crazy, okay? like 6 is actually insanely high, like way higher than most. and one of those is the universe where i accidentally killed the actor who played Dipsy from Teletubbies when i was 7 and my life went completely differently as a result. and we still ended up friends! also you were a girl in that universe for some reason. what? oh, uh, yeah, you were cute as hell. like really cute. did you just fucking giggle

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being famously not profitable helps a lot I think

can’t believe tiktok is actually getting banned, twitter is infested with bots and brainworm-infested musk bootlickers, facebook is king of QAnon, instagram caught the plague from facebook and is dying a slow death in real time… and as the dust settles… only Miss Tumblr is left standing… failing upwards once again

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so not to be overly emotional but I am thinking about the fact that when a player scores a goal the whole game stops so they can hug their friends and high five the bench and when a player hits a home run the whole game stops while they run in a little circle and all their friends that were on base wait at home plate to hug them and after every free throw regardless of if they make it or not the players gotta high five their buddy to say you got this and at every time out they all come on the court to embrace the players coming off and after every win there are goalie hugs and when a pitcher gets pulled after a rough start the players all come by to put an arm around them and say we got your back and the first thing that happens when a team wins a championship is they run directly into each other’s open arms and shout for joy while the losing team processes in silence still giving out comfort hugs and pats and it’s just really beautiful that despite how being seen as soft is supposed to be such a terrible insult their first instinct as human beings after anything good happens is hug your friends and their first instinct after anything bad happens is still hug your friends and so really in the end what are sports if not an excuse to hang out with and hug your friends all the time?

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“I’m like, ‘Okay, she’s a doll. She’s a plastic doll. She doesn’t have organs. If she doesn’t have organs, she doesn’t have reproductive organs. If she doesn’t have reproductive organs, would she even feel sexual desire?’ No, I don’t think she could,” Robbie said. “She is sexualized. But she should never be sexy. People can project sex onto her. Yes, she can wear a short skirt, but because it’s fun and pink. Not because she wanted you to see her butt.”

Margot Robbie said Ace Barbie Rights with her whole chest.

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My adopted son just came out to me as gay. Do I buy him something rainbow for pride? Maybe a bandana? He’s the one with dark hair, the other one is his boyfriend.