greeneyedsigma

[greeneyedsigma]

Silly idea I had;

In which Fem! Luffy/Zoro/Fem! Usopp are a throuple and Sanji is the only one who notices and he slowly loses his mind because why does Zoro get all the girls?!

Sanjo recognizes the romantic undertones of Zoro’s interactions with both girls almost immediately; a hand on Usopp’s waist here, gripping Luffy’s hip there. And for some time, Sanji seethes, thinking Zoro is playing both of them. But then come the little moments between Usopp and Luffy; holding hands, playing with each other’s hair, cuddling in the sun.

And the kisses, lord help him, the kisses. Luffy tugging Zoro down to brush her lips against his with a cheeky smile. Zoro dropping a fond kiss on a fretting Usopp’s forehead. And Usopp pressing a lingering kiss to Luffy’s cheek, hiding her burning face when Luffy waggles her eyebrows at her.

Meanwhile, Sanji’s in the kitchen ranting to the other Straw Hats like;

[greeneyedsigma]

Garp is definitely the type of guy who starts calling Sengoku “Wife” when he’s annoyed with her. Like usually he calls her Sen or Senny in all but the most serious moments, when he calls her Sengoku.

[greeneyedsigma]

Chasing Dreams, my fem! Monkey D Luffy One Piece fanfic is now posted up to chapter 14! We’re currently in the Drum Island Arc, an arc I had initially skipped over. Coming back to it I decided Chopper deserved a better introduction to the AU.

Go check it out and see if it’s something you’d be interested in reading anf leave me a comment telling me what you think!

[greeneyedsigma]

Garp, laying on his back, fingers laced together behind his head: Senny, if I ever can’t get it up without drug intervention, I want you to take me out back and shoot me.

Sengoku, half asleep and burritoed in all the blankets on their bed: Ok, sounds good.

**

Rayleigh, considering: At what age is it, do you think, that girls stop being able to put their ankles behind their heads?

Sengoku: Oh, I can still do that.

Rayleigh: ...no wonder you and Garp still fuck so much...

Sengoku, snorting: That’s not the only reason.

[greeneyedsigma]

Monkey D Garp Headcanon;

He’s a borderline nudist when he’s at home. Like Sengoku doesn’t even blink anymore at suddenly seeing Garp’s dong, she’s so used to it. Granted they’ve been married for nearly 60 years.

There’s also a running joke amongst the marine higher-ups that’s basically “Who hasn’t seen Garp’s dick yet?”

Additionally, he claims to sleep in the nude as an intimidation factor for any of Sengoku’s would-be nocturnal attackers.

[greeneyedsigma]

Crocodile’s priorities after Luffy let’s him out of his cell in Impel Down

1. Get himself a classy ass suit

2. Grab Daz

[greeneyedsigma]

fanfic writers are so fucking awesome man. they write novel length fics that are sometimes even better than some published bestselling books written by professional writers. like fanfic writers are professional writers to me and they gift us their masterpieces for free. they give us something we can look forward to after a long day. something from which we can seek comfort when life is hard. something that can be our own little getaway. in a world of capitalism, despite everything, they give us all of these for free. like holy fuck. shout out to every fanfic writer. I wish all fanfic writers a very ‘I love you with all my heart and soul. I thank you from the bottom of my heart’

[greeneyedsigma]

Imagine Kid getting jealous of Marine! Law because Luffy’s super clingy of him (because he’s basically her cousin and she adores him...and because it annoys him) and Law gets caught in between a bickering KidLu

[greeneyedsigma]

Charlotte Cracker and fem! Sky Rider Shura’s relationship in a nutshell:

Shura: Have I ever told you that you cook well?

Cracker: Awww, no, you haven't!

Shura: So why do you keep cooking?

**

Cracker, texting Shura after being called for a Sweet Commander meeting: It’s too early in the morning for this.

*sent at 11:57 AM*

**

Cracker, texting Shura: *sends a voice message*

Shura, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?

Cracker: No, don’t worry, just listen later.

*later*

Shura: *presses play*

Cracker's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

**

Cracker: May luck (and this picture of Shura eating shredded cheese at 3 in the morning) be with you.

**

Cracker: If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're impressed.

Shura: But you do know better.

**

Cracker: I sort of did something and I need some advice, but I don't want a lot of judgment and criticism.

Shura: And you came to me?

**

Cracker: I’d kill someone if you asked me to.

Shura: I’m pretty sure you’d kill someone even if I didn’t ask you to.

**

Shura: Did you just refer to a knife as a “people-opener”?

Cracker:

Cracker: …Should I not have?

[greeneyedsigma]

Drake: *venting endlessly to Hawkins about their week*

Hawkins, every once in a while: *in a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.

**

Who’s Who: You’re pretty and you’re smart, and you’re ignoring me, so obviously you’re my type.

Drake, who was distracted: I'm sorry- what were you saying?

Who’s Who: Perfect.

**

Luffy: Can you keep a secret?

Hawkins: Do you know anything about my life?

Luffy: No, I don't. Good point.

**

Drake: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.

Kid: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in their own pool. Big difference.

**

Hawkins: Kid is not a morning person. Or a night person. There’s really only about seven minutes a day he’s fun to be around.

Kid: The best part is you never know when they’re coming.

**

Luffy: I didn't drink that much last night.

Drake: You were flirting with Kid.

Luffy: So what? He’s my boyfriend.

Drake: You asked if he was single.

Drake: And then you cried when he said he wasn’t.

**

Apoo Scratchman: What's worse than a heartbreak?

Hawkins: Stepping on a cat's tail and not being able to explain that you're sorry.

[greeneyedsigma]

TikTokers are such pussies when it comes to ships. “B-but they’re not canon 🥺🥺🥺😭😭😖😖” honey back in my day we shipped characters from entirely different medias uphill both ways in the snow

[greeneyedsigma]

Garp: Me and my wife don't argue. She tells me to shut up and I do.

**

Sengoku: Stop thinking whatever you're thinking.

Garp: Huh?

Sengoku: You always make that face when you're about to say something stupid just to piss me off. So cut it out-

Garp: I love you.

Sengoku: *squints*

Garp:

Garp: Also, cereal qualifies as a soup.

Sengoku: I KNEW IT!!

**

Garp: *Talking to a random navy officer*I don’t know how you have your foot in your mouth, your head up your ass, and your nose in my business. But here we are, you fucking wizard.

[greeneyedsigma]

Garp: says something romantic and embarrasses himself and covers it up by saying something rude/brash. Lucky for him, Sengoku doesn’t mind being told her tits are still fantastic.

Sakazuki: Says something romantic and gets grumpy in his embarrassment whenever it’s acknowledged; Crocodile wraps her arms around his neck and makes him repeat it until she’s had her fill

Kid: Shocks himself whenever he says something sweet, covers it up by getting Pissy trying to pick a fight before giving up when Luffy kisses him all over his face.

Who’s Who: Intentionally says things he knows are going to embarrass Drake and turn her into a stuttering flustered mess because he thinks she’s adorable when it happens.

[greeneyedsigma]

*Shortly after meeting for the first time*

Kaido: What are your adjectives?

King: …You mean my pronouns?

Kaido: No, I know what your pronouns are! What are your adjectives?

King: …I dunno. What are yours?

Kaido: Drunk, noisy and chaotic!

King: I’ve never had something go from making no sense to making complete sense so quickly.

**

King: If I see a bug, I simply leave the room elegantly and require someone else do something about it.

King: If no one fulfills my wish, I simply burn the whole building down.

**

King: What happened?!

Kaido: Do you want the long version or the short version?

King: Short??

Kaido: Shit's fucked.

King: Okay, long.

Kaido: Shit's very fucked.

King: ...You’re the most eloquent man I know.

**

King: What's this?

Kaido, hugging King: Affection!

King: Disgusting.

King: ...Do it again.

**

King: What’s up with you?

Kaido: What do you mean?

King: You’ve been nice and helpful and considerate all day. What’s your game?

**

Kaido: You have to apologize to King!

Queen: Fine!

Queen: Unfuck you, or whatever!

**

Jack: Your lab is in the bathroom?

Queen: King says it’s the perfect place for my work.

Queen: I’m just now realizing that remark may not have been entirely complimentary.

**

King, to Kaido: You drink too much, swear too much, and your morals are highly questionable.

Kaido: …

King: Yet, for some reason, you’re everything I’ve ever wanted in a man.

**

Kaido: It smells like henway in here.

Queen:

King: Queen.

King, forcefully: Doesn't it smell like henway in here?

Queen: *sigh*

Queen: What's a henway?

Kaido: OH ABOUT TEN POUNDS!

**

Queen: It’s illegal to look better than me.

King: I guess we’re all going to jail then.

[greeneyedsigma]

Is Luffy obliterating Charlos the most satisfying moment in One Piece?

I think it might just be

[greeneyedsigma]

Sabo: You know, there’s something weird going on with your face?

Law: What?

Sabo: You’re smiling! I didn’t know you could do that?

[greeneyedsigma]

i think villains in general provide better, more epic romances because they're allowed to go to extremes. they're allowed to put their love over the greater good. they're allowed to be selfish. the best a hero can offer you is number two, because their duty comes first. villains, though. villains will burn down the world for a last kiss goodbye.