graham-lennox

[graham-lennox]

12, 19, 21

12﹕ a  text  that  wasn’t  meant  for  the  receiver .

text: Yeah thanks for that alluring offer but being your booty call after your night out isn't what I'm in the mood for

19﹕ a  suggestive  text .

text: Yeah whoever's attention you were hoping to get wearing that, I can say that you definitely got it. I think you could have had anyone

21﹕ a  text  to  a  group  chat .

text: I'll make hangover brunch. And by brunch I mean come at noon. Not two hours late. That means you LIZ

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“Well, I mean, your purpose certainly ain’t to be the pretty one, is it?”

“You know, there is a fine line between banter between friends and verbal abuse.”

[graham-lennox]

keegan-cole​:

Keegan listened and nodded. Honestly, regardless of the words, Keegan was relieved that Graham was speaking. That he wasn’t just walking away. If there was dialogue, Keegan was fairly confident he could talk himself out of all of this. “Maybe on a subconscious level you’re right. I mean what you’re saying makes sense, I’m not going to argue psychologically… yeah probably,” Keegan allowed for, shrugging. “But in the moment I wasn’t thinking any of that. I said the first thing I thought and maybe that’s worse that the first thing that came to mind was so shitty,” he paused, shrugged again and letting out a sigh, biting the corner of his lip. “I’ve said a lot of shitty things to a lot of people, but I’ve never felt as bad as I do now. That’s the truth.” Was it? Keegan wasn’t even sure. It felt real, felt genuine, but it still felt like he was just speaking to speak on some level.

“Argue psychologically?” Couldn’t help but question it with a slight scoff. Not only because framing the conversation in such a structed way felt cold but it was like even when admitting he was wrong, he was leaving room that somewhere in this he wasn’t.  “I don’t have a doubt that you feel bad but I don’t think it’s actually for me,” he spoke out honestly. “You feel bad for you because you know that this isn’t just something that a sorry is going to patch over. I can’t let it be that. I compromise so much so that it is possible for there to be an us here. And that is my choice, I’m not putting that on you. I know what the sacrifices are to be with you and even when they have left me needing, I found it worth it.” He knew exactly what he wanted to say next but took a moment to think how to word it. “I would never pressure you into figuring out how you can stop hating this part of you. But I also can’t let you pull me in to being ashamed of myself because you’re ashamed of me.”

[graham-lennox]

keegan-cole​:

“Maybe it would,” Keegan shrugged, and that was one of the more honest sentiments he’d had. “I deserve to hear how I made you feel,” he shrugged. “I deserve whatever it is you could to say to me.” Keegan believed those words, but he also knew it was the type of thing he had to say then. It occurred to him as they came out. Like they were genuine, but then it was like he was incapable of saying anything genuine. It felt fucked up, and he felt fucked up. Like everything was curated, even when he didn’t intend it to be. “I know it seems stupid to say, but I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

Graham was ready to just take it easy on him for both their sakes. Give a light version of what was going on in his head but there was something in his last words that triggered that hurt that turned into anger. Though even angry, Graham still had a gentle way about him. “Yes, you did. Saving yourself may have been your first priority but hurting me was how you chose to do that,” he called him out. “You had so many other options but you went with the most damaging cause you knew that would separate you the most from me in front of them. You want to lie out there to all of them, that is your choice. But don’t bullshit me so you can put a band-aid on this.”

[graham-lennox]

keegan-cole​:

“Graham, please,” there was compassion seeped into his tone, and while he could have come up with all the excuses and reasons in the book for him to have acted that way, he genuinely did feel bad. He was selfish and he could be cold. He knew that about himself, but his feelings were Graham were real and they were big. Hurting the man hurt him. “I was an ass. I know that. Just please talk to me.”

The gentle plead did it’s damage, pulling at Graham’s heart, making it ache. Like for those few seconds he should feel bad for Keegan and that felt so messed up. So many nights he could just bow down to what the other man needed but he was hurt. “I can’t talk to you right now because to do that with how I feel wouldn’t do us any good,” he decide to be honest, looking at him and shrugging.

[graham-lennox]

keegan-cole​:

Keegan wasn’t oblivious to his words and actions. He knew he was in the wrong, but he had a million and one justifications in his own mind. He also knew he couldn’t speak any of those, and that became clear immediately when he entered the room with Graham. “Hey,” he grabbed Graham’s wrist. “Can we talk? Please?”

He had gotten used to seeing Keegan out and not being able to react in the way he wanted. He wasn’t naive enough to ever think that tonight would be anything different. Though maybe there was a second of foolishness that he allowed when Keegan landed on him, but the way he was rejection fell more on humiliation. “Not right now. I would really like to just get back to the party.” He didn’t pull his wrist away but he didn’t look at Keegan.

[graham-lennox]

@keegan-cole​

He was washing his hands when he caught in the mirror who just came in the bathroom. Graham didn’t say a word as he finished up, going to grab a paper towel to dry his hands off. Besides the look in the mirror he kept his eyes off of Keegan, ready to leave. “Excuse me,” he said passing him to get to the door.

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“But you’re already thinking it, aren’t you? I can tell by that stupid look on your face that you’re about to ask me where the rest of my clothes are so I’m answering for you before you can even open that mouth of yours up.”

“You know what I’m thinking. You know what I am going to say. It’s like I don’t even have a purpose in this relationship anymore.”

[graham-lennox]

“I don’t remember asking a single thing that would have ever led to me knowing this information.”

“Look, I don’t actually wear anything when I go to sleep but they told me I couldn’t make it through the door unless I was wearing pajamas. Apparently kicking it in your birthday suit does not count and even that is deemed too fucking inappropriate for this thing.”

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“You know, all that shit tells me is that you like your comfort zone and that your comfort zone is boring. Come on, Grahamcracker. You need to pop that bubble butt of yours and live a little.” She rolled her eyes. If anything, the way he were describing things just made Liz feel all the more restless. “And when I said I was going to lock you up, I never said that you’d be with someone. It sounds like you need a little solitude with just yourself and maybe a straight jacket.”

“I have been out of my comfort zone plenty. Every relationship I have had is that. But you get to a point where something easy doesn’t seem as terrifying to settle for. You just aren’t there yet,” he nudged her lightly. Though he wasn’t sure that Liz would ever be there. “Yes because the two of us, I am the one that needs to be in the nuthouse.”

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“Come on now – what’s wrong with a little boring? You can’t tell me that shit’s a serious question.” Liz practically snorted as she turned her head up at him. Sometimes she wondered how they were even friends but then she remembered life without him would be a little less colorful. “You don’t even like peace and quiet. You’d get sick of that shit if I locked your ass in a box for 3 days straight.”

“Yes, it’s serious,” he defended himself though there was a chuckle in his voice. “There is nothing wrong with being content with something that always isn’t exciting.” And though he believed that, his track record in choosing people hardly backed up his words. “It’s you who doesn’t like peace and quiet. I for one find being able to sit with someone in silence something telling.”

[graham-lennox]

@bridget-wyatt​

“Just how strong do you need the coffee?”

[graham-lennox]

@keegan-cole​

It was always mixed feelings when accidently running into Keegan out in public. He always wanted to see him but not knowing what lines were set when made him fight what felt natural. “I like that shirt on you,” he settled for his greeting.

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“It’s not creative, Grahamcracker. You know I just say what shit is on my mind. I’m naturally unfiltered and you fucking love it. Your life would be boring without my ass.”

“Sometimes I don’t think that there is anything natural about anything that comes out of your mouth. And what is so wrong with a little boring? Sounds... Peaceful,” he ended with a smile. When really he couldn’t imagine life in this town without her.

[graham-lennox]

elizabettawilson​:

“Um, no. I just drink up. When it comes to actually being creative? You know that I am absolute horse shit in that department.”

“I disagree. I have heard some creative language come out of your mouth plenty of times. Some painted visuals haunt me to this day.”

[graham-lennox]

“I feel like you out of all people would have some insight to the minds of these kind of people that come up with that shit.”

“Really - who the fuck names all these drinks? I mean, who the fuck knocks one back and thinks ‘oh this shit tastes like a kick in the crotch or this shit tastes like a red headed slut?” Liz questioned as she held up the empty shot glass that she had just downed the liquid from.

[graham-lennox]

keegan-cole​:

“There has to be some kind of middle ground,” he rose his brows and gave a little shrug. He knew that Graham’s way of life was better, that wasn’t news to him. He envied it, but he couldn’t bring himself there. “Trying to romance me now?” He asked, a little chuckle laced into his words. “How badly do you want to dance with me, huh?”

“I don’t really know if life allows that. At least not in my experience.” He kept his tone light not wanting to make the conversation heavy with a topic that they avoided more often than not about Keegan’s sexuality. “I am. Is it working?” He put his hand back back out to him. “Badly enough I’ll let you have the next two movie night choices and a neck massage?” It was all there was to barter as their date nights all looked about the same.