girlfishes

[girlfishes]

I think that there is a compelling biological argument that men are naturally aggressive.

This will be me yapping for way too long, but hear me out.

In many sexually dimorphic species, the males live a very short life. Think of bugs, like spiders and wasps. When males are born, they inseminate eggs and then die, or eaten, or exiled. To keep them involved any longer is a waste of resources that could be used on the females to create more offspring. Male bugs live a harsh life, because they are barely necessary except in their limited reproductive role.

Bugs are r-selective species, which means that their reproductive cycles prioritize producing as many offspring as possible with the expectation that most will die before they reach maturity. And the limiting factor in that equation is the number of females, which means that more males are created than are necessary in a 50-50 split.

As life forms become more complex, species become k-selective. This means that the energy in reproduction is put into creating few good-quality offspring. The mothers spend more time with their children, gestate them inside their bodies in the case of mammals, and stay with them until they reach maturity. It takes much longer for a k-selective species to reach sexual maturity, and males in such species are no longer anatomically inferior like they are as bugs.

The primary interest of the individual male is to make sure that his genes are passed on. But this isn’t so easy. I’m going to speak in terms of bears from now on. One male bear can impregnate 50 female bears, and those female bears will no longer be fertile for some time. Bears won’t just pair off monogamously, so male bears face steep competition. They kill each other and they kill each other’s cubs in competition to the limited females who can pass on their genes.

Now what does this have to do with humans? Well, we’ve established that in order to survive and personally reproduce, a male of any species is fighting an uphill battle due to the limited number of females and the female need to not waste precious resources on them. Both of these stem from the different reproductive roles inherent in sexual dimorphism seen across species. The males who succeed in reproducing will have necessarily been stronger and more aggressive. Basic survival of the fittest method will tell you that whatever causes these traits will be passed down.

Humans are the same. The bodies of women are largely organized around the production of large gametes and the gestation and feeding of offspring. The male body is organized around the production of small gametes. Males have been selective bread over millions of years to compete with other men and ensure that women cannot siphon resources away from them. This manifest in higher muscle mass, larger stature, and yes, high testosterone.

For thousands of years human males have forced themselves to remain relevant by crippling the lives and freedoms of women by the disabling nature of pregnancy and their superior strength. They also wage this battle psychologically, which is unique to human beings.

It is important to note that I can argue these points and still acknowledge that men do have the ability to think, feel, and reflect on their actions. If they so chose, they could turn their backs on this troubled past and start a new way of society which values individuals for their minds instead of their bodies.

This is not a fatalist dooming of all future men to forever stick to this pattern. The aggressive actions of men are borne from a deep insecurity that women do not need them. Because we don’t. But the thing is, human beings are capable of valuing each other for more than our reproductive roles or capabilities. Men need to not let their maleness define how they relate to women and each other, but let their humanity guide how they treat other humans. Only then can we leave this all behind.

If you read all of this, thanks for bearing with me.

[girlfishes]

why is this real life

[girlfishes]

"This is what Kamala did wrong and how she should gave run a better campaign" she did everything the exact opposite of what Hillary Clinton did and in the end it didn't fucking matter because our country hates women, you pretentious fuck.

Kamala and Biden and Hillary all had roughly the same goals. Two of them are women. Let's see how this goes.

You can smarmy yourself into righteousness all you want, but in the end, men just hate women, and lots of women also hate women, and here we are.

[girlfishes]

I’m not going to participate in the further division of women as a class by blaming a certain demographic of women for the outcome of this election like lefty men will undoubtedly do. I don’t participate in the “stupid [insert demographic here] women got what they deserved” that inevitably always happens.

yes, women who voted for trump or didn’t vote worked against their interests and are class traitors, etc etc etc. ultimately it is men’s hatred of women that determined this. it is MENS hatred of women.

[girlfishes]

who’s down to start a new country with me.

[girlfishes]

hearing a political analyst on the news say that "the democrats clearly misread how high on the priority list that women's rights are for the average american" is just so chilling

[girlfishes]

Word

[girlfishes]

maybe this election and men's reactions will make women realize men love rapists more than they like us but many of you are stupid so idk

[girlfishes]

:(

[girlfishes]

❗️Nevada voters - this is going to sound weird, but PICK UP YOUR PHONE if an unknown number calls.

**Lots of signatures on ballots are not matching and your ballot may need to be fixed.

TLDR; yes, signature matching is an antiquated way to verify ballots but it is still being used. Reportedly thousands of ballots here need to be cured. Answer the phone!

[girlfishes]

in consensual sex you can stop at any time for any reason

in consexual sex if something happens that makes you feel uncomfortable or weirds you out, you can walk out of the door and get out of there without any consequences, without having to explain yourself

in consensual sex you never have to explain why something is uncomfortable or why you don’t want it done to you

in consensual sex if you even think about wanting to stop, you don’t have to think twice before saying it out loud

in consensual sex nobody should ever be telling you “you’re spoiling the mood” or “don’t be like that” when you’re unwilling

in consensual sex, nobody should ever be talking you into something you said no to

in consensual sex, nobody should be trading future favours in return for you agreeing to something you don’t want to do

in consensual sex, you should never be forced to demonstrate how much you trust your partner by letting them do whatever they want 

in consensual sex you never have to shut down your instinct that something is wrong 

in consensual sex, nobody should ever be doing something to you that you mentioned, implied, or explicitly stated you don’t like being done to you

in consensual sex, you should never be made to feel guilty or not good enough

in consensual sex, you should never have to expect emotional abuse, insults, pressure, guilt and shame if you refuse to participate or do as you’re told

in consensual sex, nobody should ever try to push, break, or crush your boundaries

in consensual sex, nobody should ever make you feel like you need to reconsider or push at your own boundaries

in consensual sex, you shouldn’t feel fear, not at any point

in consensual sex, you shouldn’t feel like your relationship with this person depends on what happens in bed

in consensual sex, you should never feel like it’s not okay to say no to something

if you can’t say this is true for your sexual experiences, it wasn’t consensual sex. 

[girlfishes]

Your mothers are absolutely responsible and should be held accountable for what they have done and continue to do. They are not good people and I am not coming to their defense. However you feel about them is entirely justified and I support you.

I would like to chime in because I believe Mary Daly’s token torturer concept has been misunderstood.

When Mary Daly explains that women who abuse their daughters are “token torturers” because their identities as women are used to obfuscate the fact that men are the ones who benefit from the abuse. The patriarchy uses a mother-daughter cycle of abuse to erode female solidarity while resolving fathers of responsibility.

All mothers are also daughters who were tortured by their own mothers. That doesn’t mean you have to forgive them. But don’t take your eyes off of how men benefit from the abuse.

radblr can hate me but my priority will always be daughters

[girlfishes]

Thanks for adding some of your perspective. You’re right, issues surrounding surrogacy and ethical human reproduction are very complex with many different situations and feelings involved.

As a feminist, women and their wellbeing are my first priority. The women who had to be surrogates for money should never have had to do that. Selling out one’s body in such a personal and risky way in order to eat and be housed is dystopian. I hope they are doing alright.

The practice of surrogacy doesn’t have to be traumatic in every case for the industry as a whole to put disadvantaged women at risk for exploitation. This is a risk that I, and many feminists like me are not willing to take. For as many success stories exist there are stories of traumatized women and children.

Even if surrogacy was highly regulated, it still creates a perception that children, and women’s bodies can be bought.

I don’t mean to lecture you, but rather share my perspective as you seem open to hearing it. Ultimately, you are the one who decides what you think and feel about this. Take care.

Italy outlaws international surrogacy and its spun as a loss for gay rights. I hate this. Surrogacy isn’t illegal for just gay couples, it’s illegal for everyone under this law. It’s just that gay couples may have a harder time breaking this law.

No one has a right to a baby. No one has a right to use a woman’s body.

This is not about “targeting gay fathers”. It’s about protecting the rights of the women surrogacy exploits.

[girlfishes]

no woman is required to “respect” cultural practices which are inherently degrading to them or religious beliefs which devalue them as human beings. we are not required to adhere to a state of patriarchal reverence whether we’re observing our own society or others, and we’re free to both criticize and reject any ideology that views female human beings as innately inferior or born for subservience.

[girlfishes]

Is anyone else just entirely enraged by how blatantly sexist 99% of anime is? Like, some of the best stories I've ever come across, the most beautiful visuals I've ever seen in storytelling, the most brilliant examples of raw creativity I've ever encountered, have come from anime. There are some anime that will forever be near and dear to my heart, because they are just so well made and impactful as stories and works of art.

But darn near every anime is RIDDLED with a dozen different sexist tropes and constant examples of blatant sexism. The women are generally significantly less competent and significantly more annoying than the men. Every female character who isn't an old woman is sexualized, even minors are sexualized, just in a "cutesy" way. You got 14yo girls with tits large enough to cause serious medical problems. There's regular fanservice (which unsurprisingly rarely services hetero women), panty shots, butt shots, girls practically thrusting their boobs into people's face. Sexual assault is regularly played for laughs and treated as perfectly acceptable behavior as long as the victim gets to smack her assailant and look annoyed afterwards, which has the added bonus of diminishing the impact of sexual violence by equating its severity with that of physical violence. Access to women's bodies is used to motivate male characters, and it's treated as though it is perfectly healthy for a man to pursue such access in the absence of genuine interest on the woman's part, or for a woman to be comfortable objectifying herself and using access to her body as currency. Sometimes women are portrayed as using access to their bodies to "coerce" men, as though women's bodies are something that men need, and women wanting something from men first in order to access them is a form of bullying or humiliation akin to making a starving person dance for their supper. I could go on. There are probably a lot of other things I missed because this is just an off the cuff rant and not meant to be comprehensive.

Point is, I hate this shit. I hate how just being aware of and caring about the issue of misogyny renders it damn near impossible to enjoy otherwise enjoyable things, and I hate that otherwise enjoyable things are sexist in the first place. And you never hear anybody talk about this, either, which is just the rage-cherry on top. Whenever an anime is being critiqued or reviewed or just generally discussed, all but the most egregiously sexist series being talked about by the most militantly liberal people will be spared even a passing, casual mention of how sexist they are. A character who seems vaguely racist or homophobic? Of course people will mention that (as they should). But constant sexism baked into the very bones of the series? Not worth bringing up, apparently.

[girlfishes]

I’ve had many moles removed by a plastic surgeon because they could (low chance) turn into cancer and also I’d just prefer them not to be there. I have a family history of melanoma, too. When moles are especially deep or in sensitive areas it’s best that a plastic surgeon does it. Insurance covered it as a medically necessary procedure. It wasn’t a “feminist” action but neither was it “unfeminist”. It really wasn’t that deep at all. I wasn’t thrilled about supporting the surgeon, but that didn’t outweigh the benefits for me.

Do you still consider it unfeminist to get plastic surgery if its done to restore features damaged by an accident or illness? (ex. getting a nose job after your nose is broken, or fake breasts after losing them to breast cancer) This is only considering plastic surgery for aesthetic reasons, so for instance getting a nosejob due to breathing difficulties is not what I mean here.

No, it's different and cannot be compared to plastic surgery under other circumstances.

Yes, its still unfeminist, but cannot be compared to plastic surgery under other circumstances.

Yes, plastic surgery done for aesthetic reasons will always be unfeminist.

It's only unfeminist if you severly change the original features you want to restore (ex. getting bigger breasts than what you had before or getting a 'perfect' nose, if the one you had was crooked, had a bump etc.)

Other

This would usually be called reconstructive surgery and be performed to improve the health or quality of life of the patient.

-🐌

[girlfishes]