ghostez - Tumblr blog

[ghostez]

first day as a second century warlord i have my men tie branches to their horses’ tails to stir up dust and make it look like there’s a lot of us but i forget it just rained so there isn’t any dust and the enemy can clearly see there’s like twenty of us all spread out in a line

[ghostez]

[ghostez]

[ghostez]

Now that Twitter's URL has officially changed, lets all join hands and remember that Elon Musk threw away one of the most recognizable, established brands of the past decade due to his personal chuunibyou fascination with the letter X.

[ghostez]

The number one cause of death in pregnant women is murder. Think About That.

[ghostez]

white bread squished into tiny ball added to burger king menu for one cent

[ghostez]

when I was in college in botany classes we talked about ‘cheap’ vs ‘expensive’ leaves and how some leaves are grown to be shed at the end of the fall and some leaves have a lot more resources invested and are meant to last years and then I think about the Doohicky of leaves, the Asian pitcher plant carnivorous leaves that have all the bells and whistles…..the shit has glands secreting digestive enzymes in the bottom and slippery teeth on the top and wax crystals lining the inside so insects can’t climb out….fangs on the top lid and hairs on the outside and mottled special colorization….some of them are woody or otherwise reinforced and take years to make… local guy in rural sumatra forced to make elaborate luxury saw traps by hand every single day of his life, it is the only way he can live,

[ghostez]

went to the grocery store today and i was very pleased by their pride cake selections

[ghostez]

[ghostez]

had a terrifying encounter yesterday when i offhandedly said "it's always hot to be covered in blood" and the person i was talking to was like "hm. fascinating that you believe that. let's dig into that." i'd forgotten there really are people who don't intuitively understand the eroticism of being blood-soaked. stay safe out there

[ghostez]

gravity falls was such a great show for so many reasons but one in particular that stuck with me to this day was that it proudly encouraged kids to be weird. there was never the almost stifling message of "everyone is their own normal :)" because as a neurodivergent child that is almost never how it actually feels. it did an awesome job at saying "yeah, you stick out like a sore thumb. six of em, actually! how cool is that!?" and it encouraged you to support your loved ones weirdness even if you don't begin to understand it

[ghostez]

[ghostez]

you know what? fuck you. *gives your pokémon faves brown eyes*

[ghostez]

you are hungry in the woods. are you eating moss or bug first

I am eating the big delectable USDA beef hamburger I brought with me

[ghostez]

Ay bawss! Lets me whisper sweet nuffin's in ya ears

[ghostez]

my favorite genre of football press conference answer is the “idk, what if we all just died?” one which happens more frequently than you’d assume

[ghostez]

You know what? Let's try it.