garlicsunshine

[garlicsunshine]

adding to the collective pool that is @kindatiredtho cowboy au. who else do we need to see in assless chaps 👀

[garlicsunshine]

ibiki *walks into intelligence lounge*

anko *watching real housewives*

ibiki: 👀 *begins puttering around*

anko: u know u can just admit u like the show.

ibiki: i absolutely do not.

anko: u sure about that?

ibiki: yes.

anko: alright, then you...

*tv drama intensifies*

anko: ...

ibiki: ...

*fight ends*

anko: then you wouldnt mind grabbing my phone charger from my desk, would you.

ibiki: not a problem.

ibiki *leaves room*

*tv audio cuts out*

anko: what the fuck?

anko *smashing buttons on remote*

anko: HEY IBIKI GRAB NEW BATTERIES TOO

anko: ...

anko: IBIKI... IBIKI!!! ...HEY IBIKI!!!

ibiki *re-enters room w charger*

anko: what about the batteries?

ibiki *turns to leave*

anko: wait... are those earbuds? OH MY GOD DID YOU FUCKING STEAL THE TV AUDIO!?!?!

ibiki *sweating*

[garlicsunshine]

@tazova has come thru with a decisive answer. hot springs are hotdog water 😂 im dying

for the kk soup sweep

[garlicsunshine]

text pulled from @notkakashihatake excellent tags on this post

[garlicsunshine]

winter vibes ❄️

[garlicsunshine]

for the kk soup sweep

[garlicsunshine]

some yamz to practice w a new body hair brush. i changed some more setting and it feels a lot less jarring visually than the first attempt i did of gai.

[garlicsunshine]

ymz: meet over there.

kk: meet intimately? (intentionally inaccurate sign)

ymz: no.

kk: ok...

context: we were learning "meet" like nice to meet u, and u sign by bring the hands together. someone asked if the fingertips are supposed to touch or not and the teacher was like no no no that would be like weirdly intimate to put in the middle of "nice to meet u" and then we all went on a side quest about flirting w strangers. so 😅 thats how this comic was born. the fingers touching is not a real sign in asl as far as i know.

[garlicsunshine]

gai just wants to kiss everyone

who knows if I'm ever going to write this fic so here’s a rough and tumble first draft snippet from my ��series of firsts” fic. Part one is Gai and Genma’s first kiss (225 words). Part two is Gai and Kakashi’s first kiss (375 words). Neither are dating at the time, it’s all teen party shenanigans. All wholesome, comedy heavy, no spice.

💚💚💚💚💚 ao3 💚💚💚💚💚

This first bit take place at a group celebration for Gai and some of the others passing the Chunin exams. (You can use whatever age HCs you want, for me Gai is 11 and Genma is 13.)

Gai: Someone dare me to kiss everyone here!

Rin and Genma: *split into peals of laughter*

Kakashi: that’s not how the game works. You can’t request your own dare, Gai.

Ebisu: besides, it’s not your turn anyway.

Gai: I know *dejected* I just want to do all the dares!

Raido: don’t worry you’ll get your fair share

Ebisu: now, Asuma, truth or dare?

Asuma: …truth

Anko: boring!!!

Rin: hey, don’t be rude!

Ebisu: Is the Hokage really your dad?

Asuma: yes.

Kurenai: we know that already.

Obito: you should have dared him to prove it.

Asuma: and how would I do that?

Kakashi: family pictures, blood test, family lineage scroll—

Raido: okay, okay, we get it, moving on. Gai—

Gai: YES!

Raido: I dare you to kiss Genma—

Gai: *blushing horribly* YES!!! *turns on Genma* CAN I KISS YOU!?

Genma: yeah, yeah *takes lollipop out of his mouth*

Raido: you could be a little more enthusiastic—

Genma: *turns to Raido, smirking* *passes lolli* hold this for me will you?

Raido: *pops it in his mouth*

Genma: *turns back to gai* “alright, come’er”

*Genma grabs the bandana around Gai’s neck and awkwardly smooshes their faces together. Gai plants his hands on Genma’s knees. Gai pulls back, beaming. Genma grins wide.*

Gai: ALRIGHT! Raido I dare you to kiss—

Raido: TRUTH! I choose truth!

This second bit takes place at another party, Kakashi has just made Jonin and others have just ranked up to Chunin. (Again, choose ur own age HCs, for me Gai is 13 and Kakashi is 11.)

Genma: Gai… I dare you… to kiss everyone here!

Gai: YES!!!

Everyone: *mixed reactions*

     Anko, Rin, Ebisu, Asuma: *laughing hysterically*

     Kurenai, Izumo, Kotetsu, Aoba: *laughing awkwardly*

     Obito, Kakashi: *groaning* not this again

Raido: just make sure everyone is actually okay with it first

Gai: *moves to kneel in front of Genma* Can I—

*Genma smashes their faces together then releases him*

*Gai, dazed, slumps in front of Ebisu*

Ebisu: turns his face, you may kiss my cheek

*Half of the people visibly relax*

Gai: Where would you like to be kissed!

Kurenai: *smiles* the lips is fine

Gai: And for you, Asuma!?!

Asuma: *aggressively maintaining eye contact* lips

*Gai kneels in front of Raido*

Raido: Cool your jets buddy, cheek for me.

Genma: homophobe.

Raido: *whips his house slipper at him* we’re dating!?!

*Genma, with a shit eating grin on his face, catches it*

*Gai turns to Aoba*

Aoba: uhh…

Raido: you can pass, it’s okay

Anko: *drags Gai over to her* bring it in baybee!

*Gai kneels in front of a beet red Kakashi*

Gai: what about you, Rival?

Rin: I think he wants lips.

*Kakashi glares at her*

Raido: you can always—

Kakashi: —lips.

*Gai leans forward, pushing kks scarf down and kisses him thru his mask. He is beaming when he pulls away. Kk averts his gaze, away from Rin, but catches Genma smirking, so looks away again, and Rin is grinning at him, he then snaps his head down to glare at the floor.*

Gai: And for you, Obito!?

Obito: *looks away, bright red* the cheek

Kakashi: *mumbles* coward

Rin: don’t be mean!

*Obito turns his head to yell at kk, ends up kissing gai on the lips*

Obito: aaah!

Gai: I AM SO SORRY! I should not have closed my eyes so soon!

*Genma falls into Ebisu, cackling*

Obito: ItsOkayJustMoveOnAlready …please…

Izumo: *bashful* cheek please

Kotetsu: um, pass *smiles*

Rin: finally! come here! *dramatic wet smack on the lips*

Genma: there? Satisfied?

Gai: Yes! NO! I will not be satisfied until I kiss everyone in Konoha! Everyone who wants to be kissed!

Raido: *snorts*

Rin: *claps gai on the back* a valiant goal worth pursuing! I'm sure you can do it!

Gai: thank you, Rin! I will do my best!

[garlicsunshine]

naruto: i will drag sasuke back to the village if i have to!

kakashi: and what if he doesnt want to stay?

naruto: i'll make him!

kakashi: you cant just lock him in your basement, naruto.

naruto: oh! thats a great idea! thanks sensei!

kakashi: no! that wasnt--

orochimaru: so you can keep his body in a basement against his will, but i cant inhabit his body even with his consent. seems like a double standard...

kakashi: i dont think ur really getting honest conse--

naruto: its different!

orochimaru: oh? how so.

naruto: im doing it because i care about him!

orochimaru: so you can abuse him for the sake of "friendship", but i cant abuse him for the sake of science?

kakashi: okay, well, those are a little different...

orochimaru: ah, so youre back on board with the dungeon idea then, eh kakashi?

naruto: i knew youd have my back, kakashi-sensei!

kakashi: i hate it here.

[garlicsunshine]

(unintentional) matching scars

some fluffy post 4th war kakagai (350 words)

💚💚💚💚💚 ao3 💚💚💚💚💚

Kakashi is sat next to Gai’s hospital bed tracing the zig-zagging scars on Gai’s hand with his index finger. He’s been told not to jostle him too much. His cellular structure is still regaining cohesion. Kakashi follows a scar over his wrist and up his forearm. He lets out a small huff of laughter. Gai opens an eye to scowl at him. Kakashi flashes him a guilty smile.

“Is it too soon to joke about having matching scars?”

Gai contorts his neck to peer down at their hands. The scowl leaves his face. “They are quite similar aren’t they.”

Kakashi gives an affirmative hum.

“Is that what it feels like when you use Chidori? Like you’re burning from the inside out?”

“Yeah, pretty much. But I don’t sustain it for as long as you did the 8th gate. And I’m not shredding my bones at the same time.”

Gai slips Kakashi’s wrist into his grip. He bring his hand up to his face, alongside his own. Eyes flickering between the two.

“They are eerily similar.” Gai mutters.

“Well, the body does run on electrical impulses. So I suppose it makes sense that the 8th gate would create tares along nerve lines.”

Gai brings Kakashi’s knuckles to his lips, grin spreading across his face. “You know…” He says, lips brushing against his hand as he speaks. “Matching scars is pretty gay.”

“Stupid.” Kakashi’s brows furrow in mock annoyance, but his eyes are full of mirth.

Gai’s grin widens. He presses a toothy kiss to the back of Kakashi’s hand. “It’s almost like we’re in one of those trashy soulmate novels you read.”

“Stuuuupiddd.” Kakashi drawls as he drops an elbow onto Gai’s bed, and rest his head in his hand. Blush flushing across his cheeks as Gai methodically presses a kiss to each knuckle.

Gai hums against his fingers. “What would you title our novel?”

He brings both of their hands back down to the bed. Kakashi resumes his meditative scar mapping.

“Deathly Souls?”

“Hmm, too dark. How about ‘Electric Love’.” Gai sweeps a hand through the air.

Kakashi chuckles, gazing at Gai fondly. “Much better.”

[garlicsunshine]

found a drag race pic that was so team gai coded

lee with all his bandage straps dangling everywhere. tenten wearing luscious furs over some butch sports attire. neji looking like the elitist glam queen he is.

[garlicsunshine]

exhaustion

gai refusing to take any pain meds. what else is new. (800 words of team gai hurt/comfort)

💚💚💚💚💚 ao3 💚💚💚💚💚

“I’m worried about him.”

“Do not worry Tenten! I am sure Gai-Sensei will make a full recovery!”

Their order is called. Lee zips over to the window, plucks the tray with their food off the counter, and strides back over to her. He sits as she takes her items off of the shared tray.

“That’s not what I’m worries about.” She swirls her tea around in its mug. “I don’t think he’s been sleeping. Every time I visit he seems more and more exhausted. When I ask how he’s doing he always says he totally fine.” She scowls and sets the mug back down on the table. Her face softens as she glances at Lee. “You were the same way.”

Lee pushes the vegetables around in his curry. “He doesn’t want us to worry.”

“I know that, but… that doesn’t mean he has to suffer. I overheard him refusing pain meds from the nurse.”

“Oh. I see.”

“Yeah.” She picks up a dumpling, and pops one in her mouth. “I waf hopeng you cul tal to em.” She swallows. “I’ve already tried, but he won’t listen to me. You though,” She points her chopsticks at him. “you’ve been where he is. You might be able to get through to him.”

“I will try…”

“We can go together, if that helps.” Tenten offers. Lee nods his head firmly.

---

“Alright! Enough is enough Sensei! You look like shit. You need to sleep.”

Gai glares at Kakashi as he suppresses a laugh. He looks to the door as his two students stride through.

Lee step in behind Tenten. “That is right! Oh! Kakashi-Sensei! I did not know you were here.”

“Uh,” Tenten raises her hands apologetically, “We can come back another time.”

Unmoving from his place the edge of Gai’s hospital bed, Kakashi smiles and waves them in. “No, no, in fact, I was just telling him the same thing.”

Gai’s scowl intensifies as Kakashi turns his fake angelic smile back to him. Great. He’s surrounded. He watches the resolves on Tenten’s face return as she strides across the room.

“I know you have been refusing your pain meds. Which means you haven’t been sleeping well.”

“Probably hasn’t slept in about a week actually.” Kakashi chimes in, too upbeat for Gai’s liking.

“Gai-Sensei!” The exasperation in Lee’s voice makes Gai recoil.

“And if you’re not sleeping there is no way your body is going to be able to recover.” Tenten jabs her fists against her hips and glares down at him defiantly.

“I—” Gai starts before he is cut off by Lee.

“Sensei, when I was in the hospital, did you not say that the road to recovery is a long and arduous one?”

“Yes.”

“And when you have a long and arduous journey ahead of you, is it not of utmost importance to be of sound body and mind.”

“Yes…” He did not like where this was going.

“To prepare for such an challenge, one must give the body three essential things. Rest, nutrients, and the power of determination. Is that not what you told me?”

“It is…”

“Well then, can you explain to me why you are refusing to give your body rest?

He tries to hold Lee’s fiery gaze, but he quickly resorts to looking down at his own hands. They are right. Why is he doing this to himself? He was so quick to tell Lee to be patient, take things slow, accept all the help that was offered him. Why is it so hard to do that for himself now.

Tenten sits down in the chair next to his bed. “I know you don’t want us to worry, Sensei. But what I’m most worried about why you are making things harder for yourself. This isn’t like you're self-imposed rules. If you keep going to the way you are, you’re going to hurt yourself, not make yourself stronger.”

Lee kneels down, taking one of his hands between his. He looks up at Gai with wet, pleading eyes. “Please, Gai-Sensei, let us take care of you like you took care of me!”

Kakashi leans his weight onto one arm, letting his head rest on it’s shoulder. He arches a brow, an unspoken challenge, 'Well?'. Gai’s eyes bubble over. He pulls Lee towards him and gathers Tenten up with his free hand, crushing them both against him. Kakashi smiles, shifting his hand to Gai’s leg, thumbing it gently.

“I PROMISE! I’LL DO BETTER! Starting right this second I will accept all the help I can get. You two have blossomed in fine young people. Your compassion knows no bounds! I AM BLESSED TO HAVE SUCH WONDERFUL STUDENTS AS YOU!”

“GAI-SENSEI!” Lee manages to blubber out between sobs.

Tenten muffles a string of relieved thanks against a blended mop of dark hair.

Kakashi rises. Best to get him while he’s weak. He steps out into the hallway.

“Excuse me, nurse? He’s finally ready to accept pain meds.”

“Fucking finally.”

Kakashi smiles weakly as she turns to find the med tech.

[garlicsunshine]

lil elderly kakashi at the beach

[garlicsunshine]

the fact that they have to initially leave their hand inside when they form the water prison jutsu 👀

[garlicsunshine]

gai week - bandages

some fluffy comedic team choza

💚💚💚💚💚💚 ao3 💚💚💚💚💚💚

Genma tossed his feet into Gai’s lap, then proceeded to flop backwards onto the floor with a harsh thud.

“Untie me.”

“With pleasure!”

Gai began unraveling the wrappings around Genma’s legs. This had become a ritual for them after missions. Gai didn’t use any compression bandages, but he had dabbled with them in the past. Ebisu and Genma both wore them. They did wonders for preventing injuries on the job, but there was nothing quite like taking them off at the end of the day.

Genma let out a satisfied sigh when both legs were finally free. Gai began massaging his feet. Wiggling his toes back and forth, running his thumbs across the arch. He smiled as Genma began ostentatiously moaning. Ebisu rolled his eyes as he flexed his right ankle back and forth. He moved to unwrap his other leg as he shot the two of them a withering look.

“I must say, you are too into feet Gai.”

“Shut up! Or he’ll stop massaging them for me!”

Gai laughed. “Of course I am into them! They are part of the human body. And the entirety of the human form is an exquisite thing to be worshiped at every opportunity!”

Genma snorted. “Yeah, don’t kink shame us.”

Ebisu sputtered out a few syllables before he gained control over his words again. He dragged his hand down his face. “You’re too gullible Gai. He’s just trying to get out of doing any work.”

“Hmmm, you assume I don’t want to do this for him.”

Genma sat up onto his elbows and grinned at Ebisu. His face slackened in defeat as an exasperated groan left him. He slouched back against the wall.

“Would you like me to massage your feet too?”

Ebisu slumped down further. Averting his gaze as a pout formed on his lips.

Genma’s face turned devious. “He does.”

His defeated sigh was only halfway out of his mouth when Gai reached for him. He grabbed Ebisu by an ankle and dragged him roughly towards them until his right foot was firmly in his lap. He thrust a knuckle deep into the ball of Ebisu’s foot. A high pitch whine ripped itself out of Ebisu’s throat. “That’s the spirit!” Gai continued massaging with vigor. Ebisu quickly shoved his askew glasses back up his face as Genma broke out into a fit hysterics.

[garlicsunshine]

kk *looking at the little flower growing from tenzos head*: i need to smash you into the sheets

ymz: ...

kk *panicking*: of paper! like a flower! the flower *mimes closing a book* i need to... uh...

ymz: smash me.

kk *withering away*: ...

ymz: into the sheets.

kk *barely audible*: ...of paper

i need to press that man like a flower. get in the book boy