fvdgethis - Tumblr blog

[fvdgethis]

[fvdgethis]

Wha-happened?

So nine months later, I finally remembered I had this blog. 

Soooo much has happened since then and you won’t BELIEVE the juicy details. I’ll need to remember the timeline but soon enough I’ll let you know exactly how everything went down. 

Lies, betrayal, public humiliation, crying, lots of crying, lots of tension, and somewhere in there, someone gets fired. Was it me? Did I leave that crazy job and my BFH? Stay tuned in the next post on FVDGE! 

Scandalouus. 

[fvdgethis]

The Boss From Hell

This will be an ongoing subject because most of the problems I encounter in my journey are from the last four years working under the boss from hell. 

I've worked as a Analyst for the last four years for the she-devil known here on out as BFH. Coming in, I had previous experience in the corporate world, retail, and customer service. In general, I see myself as a very optimistic and driven employee. I love being organized, finding creative solutions to existing problems, collaborating, and I also do well working with little instruction. I'm very laid back and get along with my co-workers. I mind my own business basically, but I'm ver approachable. I'm also a bit of a perfectionist. If a problem is presented to me, I'll get the job done. My previous employers enjoyed these traits about me. This would definitely make any boss' life easier.

Enter BFH. The first year I worked under her department and under her supervision, I've been submitted to 1) public humiliation at a conference filled with my peers and managers, 2) a public scolding in front of my co-workers for things I clearly was not responsible for, 3) having a folders and papers thrown to my face, 4) crying at work as she aired my personal business for all to hear, 5) blamed countless of times for things she was responsible for. She has a habit of pointing the blame on others. The list gets worst! I find this is due to her lack of control of her own stress, lack of interpersonal skills, managerial skills, time management skills, and plain old humanity. 

I've never been treated this way before at a job or outside of a job. No one deserves to be treated less than a human being. I believe you should be kind to others in general. You don't know what they go through everyday. What right does she have to talk down to me and humiliate me?

This should probably lead you to wonder why I stuck around for another three years huh? Seems like an abusive relationship where the one being abused says "it'll get better," or "he/she was just having a bad day," "he/she's not usually like this." May seem like I'm pushing it with the comparison but that is the best way to describe it. Well that goes to show you how much I can tolerate. I've stuck it out just so I can say, "yes, I've done all I could and it's definitely not me." 

I have a bit of "stick with it-ness" that I was raised to have. The type of "see it through til the end" attitude that parents in my generation instilled. Whether it came to food, a book, or a project. If you started it, you have to see it through to the end. Well, I think at this age also comes the right to end what is not working. And i've finally come to that decision. But what's taking so damn long to wrap it up? Well there lies the problem. I've been here before. I've ended it before. I've up and left, fed up with her before. But I found myself back at the same job, under the same BFH. You want to know why? Because it seemed like this time I had the upper hand. It seemed more temporary. In the end, I'm back to square one debating what to do. Details on how I end up back in hell will be in my next post. 

Til next time,

 FVDGE.

A. Beaverhousen

[fvdgethis]

FVDGE

So it's come to this. 

I started this blog to see if it would help me sort my life out. I'm a thirty-something year old woman still trying to find my foothold on life. It's always helped me to write things out in the past. I'm hoping that writing/typing it out this time will help me find what it is that I'm looking for. Actually, it's not that I don't know what I'm looking for. I do. I'm looking for a path. A path less traveled is fine, I just need to know I've found a path to be on. I'm so lost.

They say that history will repeat itself if you don't learn your lesson the first time. Boy, was that saying right! I feel that I've repeated the same mistake over and over again. Like that movie, Groundhog Day. I try different approaches. But end up in the same situation. 

My blog is titled "FVDGE." A Homer Simpson "D'oh" if you will. For every time something goes wrong (pessimistic much?). 

You'll learn more about me in each post. This is just my short and awkward introduction. Maybe some of you are going through the same thing and you can join me in my journey so you don't feel so alone. And maybe some of you have already gone through what I'm going through. It would be nice to offer some helpful advice or uplifting words of encouragement. Either are welcome :)

Til next time. FVDGE. 

A. Beaverhousen