funnylittlefiona
Funny Little Fiona
The silly musings of our funny little girl (so we don't forget!)
587 posts
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Fiona wanted to put makeup on Sylvie and acted like she was doing a YouTube tutorial or something-
Fiona: now, usually I’d start with concealer but this child isn’t old enough to have bags under her eyes yet so I’ll be skipping that step….
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Told Fiona earlier “hey I’d really like to watch the fever game tonight”.
She goes “mom I think you got it twisted - you’re the adult and we are the children. You can do whatever you want!”
SINCE WHEN??
6/21/24
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Fiona: “Is it just me or do you all sometimes want to wake up in the middle of the night and go out on the lawn and act like a panda?”
Me: it’s just you.
5/24/24
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4/11/24
Fiona has taken an EXTREME liking to golden retrievers in general but especially to a golden retriever puppy in the neighborhood. He’s 10 weeks old and his name is Pax and any time he’s being walked she will run out to yell “I LOVE YOUR PUPPY!”
Anyway, I got his mom’s number and now Fiona is begging me to text her.
F: Ask her what her address is
Me: why?
F: so I can go over to her house and ask if I can walk her dog.
Me: no, I’m not going to do that. That’s weird and we’ll come off like stalkers.
F: I don’t want to stalk her. I just want to be able to show up at her door whenever I want.
She also made him a painting of himself.
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Fiona: Max! Money doesn’t buy you happiness - dogs do! Don’t you know that?
3/19/24
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Fiona was trying to teach me some French pronunciation and I kept botching it (not intentionally)
F: MOM! Why can’t you say it right?
Me: I don’t know, but I’m trying my best.
F: …yeah, I know. It’s just that your best is pretty bad.
3/2/24
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Jeffs 45th birthday is coming up and we were discussing how to spend the day.
Max: mom! If I didn’t know better I’d say you were 36.
Me: oh thank you honey.
J: how old would you say I am?
Fiona: oh. Let’s just change the subject.
Max: well….you have very gray hair.
J: what if I had brown hair?
Max: ok….maybe 40. But mom looks 36.
2/15/24
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Fiona keeps singing a song where the only lyrics are "I'm a banana! I'm a banana! I'm a banana!"
I said "where is that song from?"
F: it's from deep in my heart.
2/11/24
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Max said he got bullied today. A kid named “Gus” kicked him and pushed him into a locker.
Fiona: I will make him PAY tomorrow. You tell me where you’re going to be at recess and I will take care of it.
Me: um, what are you going to do?
F: I’m gonna scare Gus because I am a 5th grader and he’s a 2nd grader!
Max: he’s kind of mean, I don’t think you should do that.
F: max! Have you seen how ANGRY I can get with YOU? Imagine how angry I will be with someone who is hurting my ONLY brother?
Me: well, maybe just use your words?
F: you can’t stop me from violence, mom! And if I get sent to the principal’s office I will just say “I’m not really that sorry for being a protective sister!”
They also were talking about where to lure Gus for this confrontation. Originally it was a place called the Joe Box. Then fifi said "no, let's meet at the football field". I said why? She goes "the Joe Box is concrete and the football field has padding. I don't want blood all over"
1/29/24
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Me, as I picked the kids up after school: Ok, Fiona, you have math tonight so let’s stop home real quick and then I’ll take you there.
Fiona: (dramatically) ughhh can I work on writing my story instead?
Me: after math, but not during math.
F: why not?? It’s still creating BRAIN KNOWLEDGE!
Me: yeah but tonight is for math “brain knowledge”.
F: I’m going to be publishing a book soon so I really need to focus on this.
Me: wait, how are you publishing a book?
F: it’s going to be SELF PUBLISHED- by my SELF.
1/9/24
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Jeff: you look cute today, fifi.
F: I know.
Me: sometimes people say “thank you” instead of “I know”
F: yeah but I look cute every day so I say “I know”.
1/3/24
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While hugging a stuffed monkey she’s never been into before - “I feel like this monkey is giving me back my childhood!”
Me: your childhood?
F: well, I guess my babyhood. Technically I’m still a child.
11/15/23
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Fiona has been hounding me to wake her before I leave for a work trip tomorrow. I have to leave at 6am. I said “I will hug you before I go”.
F: ok but I need you to WAKE me.
Me: ok ok
F: hopefully you’re a little more clear on the rules now, mom?
11/14/23
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Fiona just told max that when he goes to college he has to sleep at a dorm. He's very concerned.
"Can I come home on the weekends?"
Fiona: Max! I am the one who should be more worried about life. I am TEN!
11/13/23
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