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[fromnic]

He will casually

He will casually check most of the stupid list you made when you were 17 about your prince charming

He will casually listen to your complain about shitty day at work, casually comforting you, and casually letting you cry in his car

He will casually remember small details that accidentally slips your mouth, like how cheese isn't necessarily your favorite or how you enjoy watching anime

He will casually tease you or flirts with you, like casually tell you how smart you are and how he likes smart girl, or casually say yes when you tease about the idea of you two being together

He will casually show a gentle gesture, like casually catching a notebook that is about to fall from his dashborad before it hits you or casually moving the plates so your clumsy ass won't accidentally knock them over

But you won't fall for that. You can't fall for something that he does casually, to everyone.

[fromnic]

15, 51, 55. | Jeon Wonwoo

a/n: This is my first ever kpop fluff I write based on a TikTok trend about different ways to say I love you. When I saw the numbers on the title, I immediately thought of Wonwoo :D

"Babe! Look!" You cheer excitedly as you showed him the finished painting that took you days. You're so proud of your work and of course, you want to show it to your boyfriend. Wonwoo shifts his focus from his phone to your painting and smiles a little.

"Good job, babe. It's amazing," he comments simply, then returns to his game.

What's with the flat reaction???

Your excitement for finally finishing such a big project wiped away in an instant. He doesn't sound sincere at all. It's like he complimented you only because you want him to, not because he truly thinks you are doing a good job. Definitely not the response you were expecting.

Your brain starts to make you believe that he never actually cares about you or anything that you do, and he doesn't love you anymore, which make you more upset than you already were.

You decided to just clean up your studio. Something you always do before leaving the place. When he sees you cleaning up, he understands that it's time to leave.

"Let's get food!" He exclaims excitedly as he stands up, which only upset you more because now you think he only cares about food. You pretend not to hear him and continue cleaning up. You can see from the corner of your eye that he's now wandering around your studio as he waits for you to finish.

"Your doorknob is a little loose. You might get stuck one day," he said out of the blue. "Let me fix that for you."

He then grabs the toolbox he bought for you when you first got the place and starts fixing the loose doorknob. You're stunned. You do know that the doorknob isn't working properly, but you never thought of getting it fixed since it doesn't really bother you. Surely, you don't care enough to think that a loose doorknob can get you in trouble someday.

But Wonwoo did. And he prevented it.

All your anger is gone in a blink. You are now embarrassed by how stupid your brain was. You watched him fixing the door in silence trying to calm the butterflies.

"Done. Shall we go?" He asks as he puts all the tools back in the toolbox. You nod at him and smile. He walks towards you and grabs your hand. Before leaving the place, he stops for a second, "Do you want my jacket?"

You nod once again. He takes off his jacket and helps you put it on. He then throws his arm around your shoulder and pulls you closer as you two walk out of the building.

And that's how he says he loves you. It may not be blunt and direct, but it's warm. And it's beautiful. And today, you fall for him all over again.

[fromnic]

Halo, Aku di Bulan Oktober

Sudah lama tak bersua dengan kata, ya. Rasanya waktu berjalan dengan cepat— kelewat cepat sampai kepala sepertinya belum sempat mencerna apa yang dilihat mata.

Sudah berapa lama? 1 tahun? atau justru, 2 tahun? Padahal kamu sangat tahu, menulis jadi satu-satunya cara mendiamkan bising kepalamu. Alih-alih diurai, justru kamu bungkam dan lanjut berlari seolah tidak ada batu di bahumu.

Iya, berlari. Kamu gak sadar kalau sekarang kamu sedang berlari? Kamu terlalu sibuk meyakinkan diri kalau langkahmu tidak cepat, tapi tepat. Padahal, napasmu sudah berat. Kamu tidak sempat berhenti sejenak sampai kamu lupa pada satu fakta: jiwa dan ragamu perlu dirawat.

Yakin kalau kamu baik-baik saja? Setelah melewati banyak patah sepanjang 2022, apa kamu sudah rawat lukanya? Atau, kamu hanya pura-pura lupa, sampai kamu tak sadar kalau lukamu masih menganga?

Nanti, usai dengan lintasan yang sedang kamu tempuh ini, coba tengok dirimu, ya? Ada banyak perkara yang perlu dituntaskan supaya batinmu tenang. Pun perlu banyak sabar supaya dirimu sehat.

Semangat. I'm so proud of October you, aku.

[fromnic]

To His (not-so-new) Lover: A Letter

Hi! It's been 2 years since I wrote a letter. I see you're doing amazing as his life companion. I heard you two are taking things to next level? Congratulations!

I told you when he loves, he really does with his every cells, right?

[fromnic]

You always make sure everyone else is happy, but, are you?

— thoughts #6

[fromnic]

Lagi

Sembari matanya menatap kosong pada dinding yang dijatuhi air langit, isi kepalanya riuh. Sesaat kemudian sebuah kekehan kecil keluar dari mulutnya.

Ah, perasaan ini lagi. Sudah lama tidak bersua.

Atau, selama ini memang ia hanya terlalu baik membohongi diri?

Bahagia, katanya. Padahal hanya terjebak dalam lingkaran setan tak kasat mata. Kerja, kerja, kerja, pikirnya. Padahal tidak membawanya kemana-mana.

Ia menghela napas berharap pikirannya sedikit mereda seiring hembusan udara lolos dari mulutnya.

Pada akhirnya, kenyataanya memang yang harus dilakukan adalah bertahan. Lagi.

[fromnic]

"... as I walk down the stairs, I realize I wasn't truly happy. I was just distracting myself so that I don't feel the pain." — Thoughts #5

[fromnic]

“and let me sing for ever more you are all i long for all i worship and adore”

[fromnic]

Pada akhirnya, kamu akan mati rasa atas sesuatu yang sudah menyakitimu berulang kali. Kamu akan memilih tutup mata dan tidak peduli pada apa yang merobek lukamu lagi dan lagi.

Thoughts #4

[fromnic]

Mungkin

Semakin banyak memori tentangmu yang mampir akhir-akhir ini, semakin pula aku belajar bahwa ikhlas dan melepas bukan berarti melupa. Tidak, ini bukan tulisan patah hati atau semacamnya. Bukan pula rindu yang tak terucap. Meski aku juga sedang bertanya-tanya kenapa setelah sekian lama kita tak bersua masih ada tulisanku yang bicara tentang kamu. Kenapa dari sekian banyak hal, justru memori aku dan kamu yang main ke kepalaku. 

Mungkin, karena kamu yang ada di sana waktu aku nyaris berpeluk dengan menyerah.

Mungkin, karena waktu sama kamu, aku adalah versi terjujur dari diriku.

Mungkin, karena kamu pertamaku dalam banyak hal, termasuk menjadikan aku merasa ‘layak’.

Mungkin, karena kamu yang beri aku banyak sudut pandang baru tentang hidup.

Mungkin, terlalu banyak mungkin.

Satu hal yang pasti, waktu yang kupunya sama kamu adalah satu momen penting yang menjadikan aku yang sekarang. Aku cuma mau bilang, terima kasih, ya.

[fromnic]

I've always been a JYPE stan but what have been happening recently really sucks

I'm new to got7. How are they being mistreated?? I'm still trynna catch up in hard carry so 😭😭

oh hello new ahgase!! welcome aboard! 🥰 tbh there's like a huge list of what jype does, not only with them but with day6 and other groups as well. But let's focus on got7 right now, i'll give you some examples first, the ones I can remember and then links for more stuff.

Bambam had to move bc some sasaengs were following him.  Youngjae is always, and i mean literally ALWAYS posting stuff like "please stop calling me" "stop following me", etc. And jype does nothing. Nothing for their safety.

They promoted You Calling My Name for one week. The other week was for b-sides. The promos are always like this, they basically don't promote much. How can a group grown up and get recognition in their own country when they don't get fair promotion?

ahgases paid for youtube ads and on billboards. they've contacted shows like that one in usa, good day new york; Dingo, many others. jype didn't do anything.

ahgases are the ones that translate everything got7 do/post. Like I said, ahgase do the most.

also lol jyp himself is a JOKE. he didn't want all the boys promoting just by themselves on knowing brothers, he had to go there with them. that episode was wild. Watch it if you can! (there’s some parts in the video i recommended in this post but the most important part is this one)

jb had nosebleed of exhaustion bc he was working on jus2 and had to remake eclipse over 10 times until jyp liked it.

There's so sooo many examples. jype just don't care about them and their success. especially about their solo activities or their safety and healthy. Every single comeback it's the same thing about promotions since they just don't go in any variety show. Ahgases gather together once again this year, tried to contact the company and didn't have any answer, so they sent out a truck to the front of the agency, hoping that they could listen to us. Yugyeom saw that, thanked us :') I saw someone saying on twitter that the company tried to get the truck away but the driver said not today, satan lmao anyway, here's a thread of more old infos (x) and here's a video of some new stuff (x) 

also!! hard carry is reaaaally good! one of the best thing we’ve ever had 😭 having fun watching it! 💚🐣

[fromnic]

Sudah berapa tahun sejak kita berakhir?

Ah, lebih tepatnya, sejak kamu pergi dan aku berusaha membenci

Sudah lalu sekali, tapi di kepalaku semuanya masih terputar jernih

Tidak, bukannya susah melupa

Aku sudah melepas semua, kecuali memori

Gila, ya? Sebesar itu dampakmu buatku

[fromnic]

Perkara hubungan, bukannya belum kepikiran

Tapi bisa jadi, kamu sedang memproteksi diri

Kamu takut patah hati lagi, bukan?

Tak apa, wajar. Siapa pula yang mau jatuh ke pelukan sedih?

Terpenting, jangan lupa bahwa yang rusak bisa diperbaiki, yang hilang bisa diganti, yang jatuh bisa kembali berdiri.

— Aku pernah ada disana, menutup hati agar tak ada yang mampu menyakiti. Pada akhirnya dindingku tak selalu kokoh, ada yang berhasil membangun pintu dan masuk tanpa permisi.

[fromnic]

You will always be my day 1, Kak.

Aku, yang masih juga kesengsem

[fromnic]

this post was a year ago but still very relevant to nowadays situation

Is it normal to feel like a failure all the freaking time

[fromnic]

Si Tak Tahu Diri

Sebut aku si tak tahu diri

Jatuh cinta pada hamba Tuhan tak bercela

Harusnya aku berhenti

Buka mata,

Ia sempurna yang tak tergapai

Sementara aku retak yang terabai

[fromnic]

Kak , jangan senyum. Manis banget soalnya. Aku ambyar.

— Aku, yang lagi kesemsem