freakin-lovely - Tumblr blog

[freakin-lovely]

Look what TikTok is doing to us

[freakin-lovely]

I love my solitude but I was meant to be a lover

[freakin-lovely]

I made this print so long ago but everyone loves her

(You can buy one here 💋)

[freakin-lovely]

no rizz. just big bambi eyes and many, many unsettling things to say.

[freakin-lovely]

imagine someone listening to a song and thinking of you

[freakin-lovely]

nothing but flowers.

[freakin-lovely]

it would be fun if an angel and a vampire were friends i think

[freakin-lovely]

does anybody wanna frolic with me. does anyone wanna fucking dilly dally with me

[freakin-lovely]

[freakin-lovely]

She Checked Her Phone

She woke on a Friday morning, refreshed and ready to serve. It was going so well. At this point the number of weeks strung together in which she had woke to open her phone and discover a sweet greeting and a list of tasks from her dominant felt like a daily routine, filled with love and purpose. Bleary eyed, she searched for her phone and quickly opened it, excited. No new notifications.

Her heart sank. This morning was without love or purpose. It couldn't help but make her sad. Almost immediately her sadness turned to concern, and then she felt guilty for feeling sadness for herself, when it was surely true that her dominant was having trouble, and had his reasons.

She texted him,

Good morning. I hope you are ok. Let me know. I'm concerned.

and then she waited, and watched for the three little dots. She waited and watched, but the dots did not appear. Seconds became minutes, and the minutes ticked on. She put down her phone, and moved forward on the morning routine that was in place: shower, pics, panties, clothes. The shower took longer than usual, and the hot water was cold comfort to the frenzied thoughts that buzzed around her head.

She checked her phone after her longer than usual shower. She went to take her required pictures, but could not find the happy princess who usually appeared in any of the resulting photos, so she threw them all away. She would take them for him when he reappeared and asked. She checked her phone before laying out panties for him to choose and snapping a photo for him. It too would be ready when he reappeared.

She checked her phone as she slipped back into her onesie, without panties, and returned to the safety of her bed, back to the familiar feelings of anxiety and sadness that were her daily friends before she found love and purpose with her daddy. Minutes became hours, and the hours ticked on.

Where was he? Was he busy? He wasn't usually too busy to answer her. Was he hurt? Sick? These were the only possible explanations. They were the only reasons that made sense,

Unless...

...maybe this was a decision. Perhaps it was HER fault. She hadn't served him well enough maybe, or maybe he had found someone more experienced in serving, or who was prettier than she was. Maybe this was why he had vanished from her phone. She wished she could call him, but she did not know his number. She wished she could send him a message elsewhere, like an email address, but had never asked him for one. They had always spoke through the app. She felt stupid for not having another way to contact him. What if he had lost his phone? What if he dropped it in the toilet?

She checked her phone. She worried. She wondered. The sadness and anxiety settled on her like an old familiar cloak that fit her perfectly. She checked her phone. She turned on the TV, in an attempt to distract herself. She checked her phone. She cried a little - worried.

Saturday turned into Sunday without a word, and days became weeks, while the girl who had been given an opportunity to serve slowly withered, becoming a less trusting, and a less confident version of her former self. There was this hole inside her now, where there had not been one before, and she wasn't sure how to fill it back up. Maybe if she knew why, but she didn't know. If he would just come back and tell her...

With that thought in her head, she pulled out her phone, and checked it again, for dots that would never appear, and answers that never would come.

If you were hoping for a happy ending for our girl who serves, I'm sorry to say I was not able to write one. She is still pulling out her phone and checking it to see if her dominant has reappeared. She still is fairly certain it was all her fault that he has not.

The happy princess never returned in her mirror, or in the selfies on her phone, as the weeks became months, and the months became years, and she continued to check her phone, again, and again, and again.

[freakin-lovely]

girls will carry unimaginable primordial rage but still go about their day as if nothing is wrong and that is very sexy of us I think

[freakin-lovely]

[freakin-lovely]

Taylor Swift, Fortnight (feat. Post Malone)

[freakin-lovely]

Me being possessive is my love language🎀

[freakin-lovely]

[freakin-lovely]

[freakin-lovely]