former-fairestofthem-all - Tumblr blog

[former-fairestofthem-all]

emmeline as 'poison ivy'

emmeline as poison ivy

[former-fairestofthem-all]

[former-fairestofthem-all]

"you're right. if it was a gift, we could at least return it but mrs fitzherbert is for life. she's cursed to haunt the halls of networking events, ravaging the open bar, terrorizing generation after generation of old and new money nepo babies alike," em announced dramatically but not loud enough it'd cause a stir. tragic. she laughed again, wishing there were enough hours in the day to listen to gabriela roast the rest of the room. "unfortunately, it's the sugar lucille needs so it's the sugar i need. ha, yeah. don't i know it... i've worked with a lot of upper east side brides and think i can safely say, lu has them all beat. one of her special skills."

"gift is a interesting choice of word when it comes to that, but okay." she smiled and let out a laugh at emmeline's curtsy. gabriela was a fan of very few people, pennilynn lott was not one of them. "she's just grimm, never mind the fairtytale. all that sugar and sweetness of hers is enough to rot anyones teeth" interesting. the interesting rapid correction from emmeline didn't go unnoticed to gabriela. "yes, it is lucille's wedding. we're all tolerating her world for now, it's what we do for brides no matter how annoying their demands may be"

[former-fairestofthem-all]

emmeline couldn't help but grin at jess' pennilynn lott slander, it was no less than she deserved. before lucille's engagement, she never would have crossed paths with any of these people again. now, she was chasing them down. the thought was almost too tragic to bear so she drowned it with her drink. "i did promise lu i would be on my best behaviour until she was long gone on her honeymoon-," she sighed before setting her glass down. "then again, i did also promise i'd do whatever it takes to make it the most magical and talked about wedding of the season," em smirked, an old twinkle of mischief in her eye. "to jessica knightly!" she added, holding her glass up. "if i haven't said it enough today, i am so proud of you."

she let out a laugh at emmeline and leaned on the top of the box she had just placed on the table "pennilynn has a cheek to talk considering all the luncheon's she's ruined over the years with her dramatics. i don't normally condone this but fighting fire with fire when it comes to pennilynn lott might be the only way for her to top getting you to jump through hoops" she offered while she poured them both a drink and handed the glass to emmeline. "thank you! here's to new office's and brand expansion"

[former-fairestofthem-all]

Okay, I think you might just win this round of 'tragic summers'. I'll get you next time. Fine, fine...

The year was 2013 and I was a 17 year old evil genius with too much free time. Pennilynn Lott was my mother's top pick to cater the Fairball and she would have if I hadn't gotten in the way. If I hadn't, quote-unquote, "sabotaged" her crudite dip. If she didn't want to mysterious trip, drop the dip, and basically throw it in my mother's face... Well, she should have paid better attention. Anyway. Here we are, over 10 years later, and I'm grovelling for sugared peonies.

It's, like, whatever happened to looking back and laughing?

Ah, but you've assumed my alternative is something less tedious than looking over the Fitzherbert accounts. So please, Emmy, take pity on me and tell me all about Pennilynn Lott and her wedding cake quotes.

[former-fairestofthem-all]

"it's the gift that keeps on giving, right? you're welcome-- i feel pretty confident that i'd crush it at mrs fitzherbert trivia at this point so hit me up for that," she joked before doing a little mock curtsy. emmeline let out a delighted laugh at gabriela's recap on pennilynn lott. she had missed gabriela's scathing tendencies. "she's definitely fresh out of a grimm's fairytale. you can hate someone and still appreciate their piping abilities, right? i have to keep reminding myself it's not my wedding-," she said it without thinking, without meaning to then think that she wished it was- "it's lucille's. and julian but let's be real, it's lucille's. we're all just living in her world, y'know?"

"vermouth!" she repeated in revelation "that's what that godawful smell is. i could not place that for that life of me. thank you for answering that mystery for me" it had been annoying her for a portion of the evening "pennilynn lott sounds like one of those cabbage patch kids doll names. it sounds like she robs the three bears porridge, but i suppose goldilocks would be the best person for a cake"

[former-fairestofthem-all]

emmeline couldn't have agreed more and there was time she wouldn't have even entertained the sight of pennilynn lot. if she'd been forced into a room with her, she would have torn her to shreds. then lucille was engaged and emmeline was planning her wedding. "honestly, if i could get away with kicking her ass... i would. thank you though, i'll keep that in mind. i know there are other ways to fight fire with fire-- i can deal with pennilynn lott." emmeline took the glass, toasting to jess, the office and brand. "you're very welcome. i am so proud of you-- you did it. i know you're only going to get bigger and better so, the world better watch out."

she let out a laugh at emmeline and leaned on the top of the box she had just placed on the table "pennilynn has a cheek to talk considering all the luncheon's she's ruined over the years with her dramatics. i don't normally condone this but fighting fire with fire when it comes to pennilynn lott might be the only way for her to top getting you to jump through hoops" she offered while she poured them both a drink and handed the glass to emmeline. "thank you! here's to new office's and brand expansion"

[former-fairestofthem-all]

When did we become so tragic, Andrews? To be fair, I bet the Fitzherbert accounts will have more dirt in them than either of our summers. [ Emmeline let out the world's longest sigh- ] Pennilynn Lott is an evil harpy who can't let go one teeny, tiny, prank from a million years ago. I was seventeen! So, sure, maybe the ice sculptures ended up puddles and the shrimp puffs were skating around the room but still! Does that mean that Lucille's wedding cake should be punished? I am not saying 'sorry' to that woman again, I'm just not. I think this wedding is gonna kill me.

Ah, but you've assumed my alternative is something less tedious than looking over the Fitzherbert accounts. So please, Emmy, take pity on me and tell me all about Pennilynn Lott and her wedding cake quotes.

[former-fairestofthem-all]

[former-fairestofthem-all]

You've asked the wrong person, Oli. Unless you're just dying to know about the intricacies of Pennilynn Lott's bullshit wedding cake quotes.

I'm trying to delay the inevitable 'back to work' transition. Tell me, what scandalous stories do you have from the summer?

@tfrstarters

[former-fairestofthem-all]

"you're very welcome, jess-a-licous. i'm sorry for all the annoying work calls en route. pennilynn lott is really taking this wedding cake order to heart. i mean, you 'ruin' one little luncheon when you're seventeen years old and all of a sudden... the hoops i'm jumping through," emmeline sighed seemingly endlessly. she then let out a breath as the last box landed, smiling over at jess. "absolutely," she said, adding with a grin-- "and hey, congratulations."

jessica had been a busy little bee over the past few weeks. she'd been working on several projects and was in the process of moving into a new office space for her every expanding business. "hey, thanks for helping me move all these boxes from the old office space, you've been a massive help" she said adding another box to the pile "that's the last of them" she scored open a box lid and opened it up pulling out a bottle and some glasses "i think we've earned a drink, don't you?"

@tfrstarters

[former-fairestofthem-all]

"if i'd know in high school that i'd never truly escape the vermouth breath of mrs fitzherbert, i would have run away. joined a band. grew my own tomatoes-," emmeline sighed. man, she wished she'd have like, a million glasses of pink wine at this point but she was tragically here to work. "i'd ghost but pennilynn lott is the only person that my darling sister will entertain for the wedding cake so. r.i.p me."

she was over this networking event and she was over ninty-nine percent of the people in the room. gabriela stood to the side, unamused at the current drunken states of people. "you'd think people would be smarter about their drinking" she said, rolling her eyes. "some people have no class"

@tfrstarters

[former-fairestofthem-all]

emmeline: WTFFFFFFFFFF!!!!

emmeline: get it, peter 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

emmeline: we need to celebrate 🙌

🌳 a happy text. - peter x emmeline @former-fairestofthem-all

[Text]: I did it, i made a deal with Banksy to put 1 work of him in the museum.

[former-fairestofthem-all]

"Remind me again why I thought planning my darling baby sister's wedding wouldn't involve my mother appearing every other second? I mean seriously! I'm ordering calla lilies, she's there. I'm having buttons sewn into a custom gown, she's there. I swear, I'm going to wake up in the morning, brush my teeth, look in the mirror and BAM! She's gonna be there!" Emmeline was in full on rant mode from the kitchen, having already been mid-sentence when she'd arrived. She was in the middle of gracefully unscrewing two bottles of wine as she spoke (a talented multi-tasker). She stuck her head out to where Phoebe was sitting- "You coming? The wine is open." @p-as-in--phoebe

[former-fairestofthem-all]

petervanderbilt​.

“HmHmm.” Peter said, almost like a hum. He knew what it was like to not want to be like his parents. He was artistic, and it was thanks to his mother he could go for such a career - if his parents knew his biggest secret however he would definitely be disowned.

“Some champagne for me please.” normally a drink associated with celebration, which aside of how good business went - he didn’t really have something to celebrate.

“Works been good, I’ve got an Italian client last week who has some promising works.”

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ 

“Vodka soda,” Em added to the bartender before grinning over at Peter. “Being classy really is a 365 gig with you, Pete.” Actually she wondered if they had any grape soda back there... Now that would have been a drink. Anyway-- she turned her attention to Peter, leaning on her palms, listening intently.

“How promising? On a scale of minor leagues to Da Vinci? Also-,” she took a sip of her drink- “Are they hot?”

Em might have been talking about work and having a boring ass drink but she was still in there somewhere. These were the important questions. “How’re Nick and Chris doing? Still bugging you every other day?”

[former-fairestofthem-all]

petervanderbilt​.

“How dare!” He said, seriously scandalized. Though he knew that feeling because he was often called by his father’s name as well, or well at least compared to his father a lot. He sighed, he really couldn’t get out of this. “One drink.” He said putting a finger in the air to empathize with the one.

“Just because I know how shitty that is.”

*:･ﾟ☆

“I know, right!” Emmeline huffed, throwing her hands out to emphasize the general outrage. Although, if she were to be very, very, very honest... Lately she had been acting more like Ella Fairchild than was healthy. Still, Peter’s support was very much appreciated. An easy grin spread across her face as he caved (kinda). “One drink-- I pinky swear.”

Em looped her arm through his where they sat as she waved over to the bartender. She nodded sympathetically- “The untold horrors of the elite, huh? Our parents can truly be the stuff of nightmares. I mean, forget the boogey man when you’re contending with going to Cotillion,” she joked, making a face at the memory. “Tell me how the gallery’s been doing?”

[former-fairestofthem-all]

“You and me both, Pete but---,” Emmeline took in a deep breath, afraid to even utter the next words, they were so horrifying. If she could say them to anyone though, it could be him. After all, the Vanderbilts hadn’t just summered with Em and Lu-- they’d summered with her parents too. “Someone accidentally called me by my mother’s name yesterday and now I might just dissolve if we don’t have at least one drink. Okay? I need you here.”

Time is money

“You know I don’t have time for this, I have so many meetings to go through this week -” Peter said with a sigh, being dragged to a bar with false promises just to lure him in.

@tfrstarters​