flesh-and-guts

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if i was a popular minecraft youtuber id just tweet "hey guys stop drawing shipping fanart of me and my friends/coworkers, i only fucked one of them and seeing me paired with anyone else is kinda weird and crosses my boundaries" and then i'd turn my phone off

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Variations on "they would not fucking say that":

They would not fucking say that (the classic)

They might fucking say it, but they wouldn't say it like that

They'd say it if it ever occurred to them, but there's no fucking way they'd figure it out on their own

They might think it, but good fucking luck getting them to admit it

They might say it, but – and this is key – they'd be intensely fucking weird about it

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The homies <3

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EXTREME EMERGENCY! Medical fees preventing emergency hysterectomy!!!

Maha @mahafamily1 needs to have an emergency hysterectomy! She recently had a miscarriage, and if she does not have a hysterectomy NOW, she will die!!

The doctor told her EVERY MINUTE OF DELAY DECREASES HER CHANCE OF SURVIVAL!!! Minute-by-minute, we are losing Maha!!!

Because her recent emergency operation had to be paid on credit, and is not yet paid, Maha now needs to pay the full cost of the hysterectomy up-front before the procedure will be done!!! She urgently URGENTLY requires $2000 USD in order to survive!!!

MAHA IS DYING AS I TYPE THIS!!! I am in tears begging you all, do not let medical bureaucracy take such a beautiful soul!!!!

NEED TO RAISE: €1,922 EUR ($2000 USD)!!!

PROGRESS: €0/€1922

@90-ghost @nabulsi @sayruq @sar-soor @feluka @neptunerings @wellwaterhysteria @buttercuparry @watermotif @rhubarbspring @butchniqabi @butchfeygele @butchfeygela @dykesbat @dykesymmetry @dykeslexic @dykesbat @dykesbian @lesbianmaxevans @frigidwife @diasdelasombra @cuntylouis @awomanofsorts @brutaliakhoa @beserkerjewel @neechees @kibumkim @feminismwecandoit @gazagfmboost @palhelp @dlxxv-vetted-donations @commissions4aid-international @palipunk-blog @irhabiya @iraqiprincess @self-hating-zionist @antizionisttranslations @antizionistprincess @capacity2 @africant

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Shel Silverstein for Playboy, 1965

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i love my switch its like an animal to me. shhhh sweet pink and green creature download my software

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they removed posting from tumblr. now there's only scrolling down through the vast blank expanse. great

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I finished my Masters in Library and Informational Science! People asked me what I wanted as a graduation gift and I said that all I want is for you to help out @abo-ataa to support his family this winter by donating to his paypal below.

Please consider donating to my friend Hussam, he has been displaced from his home in Rafah, and has to take care of his children in this freezing cold weather without even a proper tent! A few dollars will go a long way, no matter how small! Consider it a graduation gift for me if you appreciated any of my posts on tumblr!

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i need the worlds easiest job and i need it to pay me $100,000 a year

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unfortunately for me spending money makes me so happy

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okay so i finished checking if we were friends in every universe and, uh, it turns out we're only friends in 6 of them. but look, i need you to understand these universes vary like crazy, okay? like 6 is actually insanely high, like way higher than most. and one of those is the universe where i accidentally killed the actor who played Dipsy from Teletubbies when i was 7 and my life went completely differently as a result. and we still ended up friends! also you were a girl in that universe for some reason. what? oh, uh, yeah, you were cute as hell. like really cute. did you just fucking giggle

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guy who has mistaken adrenaline for love and isn’t interested in correcting the mistake

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That’s a cute foot fetish you got there, would you mind keeping it 25796323689432 feet away from me?

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everyone is so jealous of me bc i lead a monastic life..