flaminbread

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I love them so much

predictably i love skeleton crew. i love annoying children

edit: sorry added a meme

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cody is so tired of saving his general all the time

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where i've been

TLDR: Life sucks and so does the government. Half my family got hit with some pricey medical bills plus our normal rent, so donating or sharing this would be beyond appreciated.

I know you’re all thinking “Roman! You haven’t written anything in a month, what’s going on?” First, valid question. Second, dear GOD where do I start.

Let’s keep things simple. This past month has been the literal definition of hell for me. Everything started off fairly normal, until my two remaining grandparents started having frequent hospital trips. My father spent most of his time caring for them, living mostly at their house. Given that he works most in our house, he wasn’t having an easy time. He ended up developing what his doctor said was “stress tremors”, to the point that he went on disability.

Well, even after my grandparents were a bit more stable (though still on close watch)... they continued anyway. Eventually it got so bad my mother drove him to the hospital one night and what do you know, brain tumor.

Queue several days of our family wondering what the everloving fuck we’d do without my Dad. It was several days of my dear mother (note the sarcasm) trying to control everything, my brother trying to continue school, and me taking care of the house and our pets.

We got the scans back not long after and, cue sigh of relief, the tumor was benign. It still seemed to be draining the life out of my father, though. The nurses and doctors were absolutely floored because his tumor was absolutely huge but he had no headaches. Imagine a baseball in your head. Yeah, exactly. He did however stare at the wall for hours and had a hard time getting out more than a few words. It’s probably one of my most heartbreaking memories to watch the strongest person I’ve ever known reduced to a husk on a hospital bed.

Brain surgery came soon after. He made it through and is currently in recovery. He’s speaking actual sentences, though he’s still got tremors and needs a lot of help. Still, I’m just happy to have my father.

That same week, we noticed my cat acting off. We have two of them and my cat, Gallifrey, is a talkative sweetheart who’s attached to me at the hip. But he was meowing differently and acting weird and all around not normal. One vet visit later and we find out he has kidney disease and pancreatitis. He’s being treated for it (new food, possible meds, regular fluid injections, etc.), but he’s still not himself yet. Talk about my life falling apart. This on its own my family couldn’t even begin to afford. The government seems to hate disabled people and paying for numerous doctor’s visits wasn’t remotely in our paper thin budget, much less the meds and treatment.

It was a lot all at once, and not even close to what we expected. Gallifrey is only 7 and my father didn’t show the typical signs of a brain tumor. So, I guess the universe thought “Y’know, this is a perfect time to kick Roman in the fucking balls”.

Routine testosterone blood test, just monitoring… until I got a call from the doctor. Turns out I have some untreated issues that none of my previous doctors caught. In fact, the only reason she caught it was because it was so severe. According to her she was shocked I’m still up and kicking and not in the hospital for a blood transfusion. Apparently my red blood cell count and oxygen level is insanely low, and she asked me to take a Covid test (negative), so it turns out it’s a completely different issue. I’m still in the process of diagnosing it, so that was a fun little addition. With my chronic pain and my mother in denial, I sleep most of the day and am in constant pain the entire time.

I’ll be real, I’m not a fan of asking for money. It’s not something I like, but it’s something I have to do. The amount of treatment we need, my dad, Gallifrey, and me, is more than we can hope to afford on our salaries (thank you, American healthcare!). The medical process in this country is a joke.

I’m asking y’all to help me out. Sharing, donating, whatever. Everyone around me has been kind and supportive, and I'm beyond thankful for that. If you can’t donate, please send it, share it, do whatever, I'll take absolutely anything. If I’m honest? The number I’m asking still won’t cover it, but anything is helpful.

Thank you for reading this far, thank you for sharing, for donating, for being kind, for absolutely everything.

I also understand that the internet is a horrible, despicable place, so I can give any breakdowns of what the money would be used for and give any medical info (not releasing family names or locations) to provide proof. The page includes a lovely little x-ray of my father’s head so you get to see the absolute insanity. If this isn’t enough please let me know and I can link anything else needed to confirm that yes, I am actually having the worst time of my life.

All in all? Thank you.

Donate here if you can <3

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here we go again

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cousin antics, amirite

so yea the yassified y/n will be known as yanick! they're one of y/n's many cousins but idk if we'll see every single one of them lmao

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You wouldn’t think that the introverted skrunkly man and the literal embodiment of a confident girl boss would be such a good ship, but you’d be wrong.  

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scrappy doo-lidays

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Humans Are Space Orcs and Transformers (some ideas)

Okay, a few posts on the topic “humans are space orcs and transformers” inspired me to expand this topic. Maybe some ideas from one of my reblogs will repeat, but what can I do.

The canon of transformers in all works has extremely belittled humans for an obvious reason — the central theme is cool robots, and people are templates for the viewer’s projection (or budget savings, because it will be easier to draw / model people, so you can save on reducing the number of frames with robots).

But if we move away from this and look towards the realistic relationship between humanity and Cybertronians, then we could come up with a bunch of interesting situations that few of the creators have thought of.

For example, transformers consider humans weak and pathetic because we are small and organic. Yes, realistic for a first impression. But why don’t people treat them the same when they first meet? We humans are very sensitive to technology, because we know that even an industrial robot can fail, because the more complex the technology, the more variables that can break. Just look at the reaction of the owner of the car, if it was even slightly pushed by something (if there was no person inside, of course). Where are the people who start panicking at every fight, where is the human who is on the verge of a heart attack looking for the number of the nearest car service station after hearing that their Cybertronian friend fell into the lake? Eventually we would have realized that transformers are tougher, but the initial reaction would have been like this.

Although, why wouldn’t Earth be a dangerous place? After all, water getting inside the transformer frame, stones and sand getting stuck in the welds of the transformation, cold and frozen water could be a huge constant problem, since this is a non-standard environment for their kind. But this is usually skipped, although it could be a plot reason for friendship with people who could help with this, since they are familiar with similar problems with their equipment. Yes, in some continuities it rains acid on Cybertron and all that, but this does not make the Earth some kind of paradise in comparison.

Why is there not a single moment where a hyperactive person tries to find some softer place on a bet, a wire or an energy line, for example, and bite? People like to mess around like that, especially friends. And how much Cybertronians can be surprised by their friend’s phrase about wanting to eat them because of tender feelings (it won’t help if they find out about the case of the plane being eaten).

Where is this here: — Energon is delicious, right? — For us, yes, but you can’t. — … — No, this is fatal poisoning for your kind! — I’LL DIE TRYING, JENNY, GEORGIE, WHERE’S THE CAMERA?!

Where is the test drive of all the possibilities of your metal friend? — And then you jump and transform around me! — I’m afraid you’ll be crushed. — Okay, let’s try with the dummy first.

Why has everyone forgotten Astoria’s legacy and is no longer trying to inter-species romance? Where are the strange courtship on the part of humans, such as going to a premium car wash, trying to synthesize delicious energon for a date, incredible rage against someone who somehow offended a love interest? In the end, it’s also a great ground for tragic stories, people don’t live long, and Cybertronians are constantly putting themselves in danger. And longing after a moment of attachment in time is just as sad as a human’s attempt to somehow preserve the memory of a seemingly immortal and invincible friend, which there is no one else to keep, and this, too, will not last long.

Humans are described mostly as useless friends who, for the convenience of the plot, are usually taken hostage or simply useless in this war as a species.

And it’s just surprising. Humans. Useless. In the war. Humans who fought before they took a stick and a stone in their hand and from that moment improved weapons, skills and techniques of conflict management. Humans whose military demands move science to the same extent as industrial ones. And we wouldn’t have found a way to fight alien robots? The first question that the military would ask scientists is how to break through Cybertronian armor and at what temperature it melts (and don’t ask where they will take samples). Having suffered in the early stages, we would have regrouped and thought about what to do next. People are small, so they will fight back much more fiercely if they are cornered by someone big. This is quite common among animals, so it would be a natural thing among humans. To set traps using our specific landscape, to drive the enemy there with the help of energon, which can be poisoned, even if they take it away, they will still get hit. It didn’t work out to fight with our weapons — we will improve, it didn’t work out too — we will steal their weapons. Open war is not an option? You can fight a guerrilla war.

And it’s not worth saying what a real nightmare we can do if the government delays recognizing the extension of humane treatment laws to Decepticons. If this law is often violated in conventional wars, then it’s scary to imagine if it will be abolished here in relation to the enemy at all. And if researchers with a scientific interest get involved in this… History has a huge number of examples of what our curiosity is capable of. — And then, later, we realized how to turn off their pain receptors! — Yes, but it wasn’t necessary anymore.

Allow a mad scientist to make a mecha suit out of a dead Decepticon and send the most reckless soldier to the battlefield. Not as the most effective combat unit, but as a intimidation and demonstration of what we can do with your dead brothers in arms. I have no doubt that someone would have thought of it (well, I thought of it…). Adaptivity, ingenuity, quick learning, desperation and recklessness — this is the main weapons of humanity.

And who said that transformers will necessarily be effective in war? The fact that they have been fighting for millions of years does not mean that they are doing it successfully, just the opposite (Even your vaunted IDW shows some kind of sucks instead of logical fighting). In the end, they have soldiers and units of military equipment are the same thing, in which case both are lost. In addition, if humans can retrain soldiers and transfer them to other duties, then you will not force those who transform into a tank to replace the seekers when there is a shortage. Moreover, in most continuities, in principle, Cybertronians have difficulties with reproducing numbers, because it’s cool to get adult fighters and members of society at once, but when this process depends in most cases on your planet, which is most often a little dead, or some artefacts, then scores with humans begin to be compared. With certain difficulties and with the expenditure of time, but humanity can reproduce itself independently in theory wherever there are suitable conditions for the life of our species. Probably winning option could be a superweapon to blow up the entire planet at once, then yes, it’s successful.

Well, just go to any forum ala “Why mechs from anime sucks!” and there will be an essay for a thousand pages about the fact that such a humanoid form is ineffective in war with a whole list of methods for breaking these things (hit the joints and the head — the very first rule).

Oh, you can say, “But in IDW, people were doing something there!”. No. The humans there were mostly exposed as idiots, who, as it turned out, acted according to the plans of the Decepticons. Humans weren’t even allowed to be evil on their own! They can be shown as good and evil, your favorite gray morality (which never really existed in IDW), but there is no this, just another stick in the Atobot wheel from the Decepticons.

It’s just that sometimes I want to tell the authors of works on this franchise to decide not to include humans at all or, since they had to bring in their participation, AT LEAST TRY TO WRITE A STORY LOGICALLY. I understand that many authors are stuck in some kind of teenage “humans are not cool!”, especially those who are responsible for the plot of comics, but this does not justify laziness in terms of the plot with people. Even if you were forced, well, at least try to do the job well and efficiently, and do not turn everything into some kind of fan fiction with crushing “stupid and pathetic flesh”. It hasn’t been entertaining anyone for a long time.

I’m not asking to include humans in every story, but maybe it’s possible to try something new for them at least once in more than 30 years of franchise history? Humans are boring just because the authors don’t want and don’t know how to work with them, that’s all.

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Tis the Season for Giving - Obey Me Headcanons

I was working on some Christmas gifts for my friends (I like to give handmade personalized ones whenever possible) to give my brain a break from words and it got me thinking: Beel would be the BEST gift giver.

Like, Lucifer and Mammon give you super expensive shit because of their pride and/or ego and they think that giving you expensive, flashy gifts shows either a) that they're rich as fuck and can afford to flourish you with this things (Lucifer) or b) that of COURSE you'd want a super sparkly gold necklace, it'd look stunning on you (Mammon). Levi would honestly probably get you something that either comes in a matching set for himself or that he himself wanted anyways and use it as a reason to spend more time with you. Satan would be the best gift giver BUT he over thinks it. He knows everything about you and your interest, but as he's trying to come up with a gift he starts putting too much thought into it and nearly melts his own brain. He ends up getting so caught up in trying to get the perfect gift, he nearly runs out of time to assemble it, and has to settle for something else instead. Asmodeus ... Well he's ASMO! The man gets you all kinds of luxurious items that will make your skin glow and sparkle and feel softer than any cloud. On top of that, he'd probably throw in some risque pajamas and a rose just for funsies.

Belphie does put some thought into it, and probably ends up making those little "coupon" books. One says "Free nap with my pillow", another says "Free cuddle session", another says "Free night out", etc. It's personal, but doesn't require too much effort and is something that allows him to spend more time with you.

BUT BEEL! Beel goes all out! He spends MONTHS thinking over your hobbies, and your interests and handmakes a personalized gift with customizations to match you and your personality and your favourites and memories of your time with him and pair it with a gift basket of all your favourite things. It's not perfect, and maybe some of the lettering on the thing he made is a little wonky, but it's made with nothing short of pure love. - He'd never waste the opportunity to show you how much you, your presence, and everything you've done means to him.