feral-pixie-dream-possum

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Sympathies

Salutations

Deepest regrets

Jokulations

Heartfelt explanations

Grievances

Warm regards

Curses

I love self-referential statements where you just say the name of the thing you wish to express and it counts as having expressed the thing so named. Apologies. Greetings. Fair warning. We should be able to do that with more things, I think.

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People recreationally lying on tumblr is like a misinformation vaccine.

You're exposed to false information that's presented as if it's true, but which has been rendered harmless by being something absurd and utterly ridiculous, and even if you do catch something from it, the response is getting ridiculed on the internet instead of getting sucked into a cult. So the next time you encounter something that sounds absolutely mindblowing, some part of your mind remembers to check the sources, because you're not going to repeat the purple-eyes-no-periods mistake again.

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Harrison Wood Hsiang

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probably the best advice I've ever got was from my grandpa when I moved from my town and started a university, he told me to leave the house everytime when I start to feel down, just to go to the park, a supermarket, a bookstore, to even drive in a bus or tram, just be around other people because staying at home all the time kills you; and you know he was right

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Birger Hansson-Böe (1900 - 1986) - Dusk Landscape by the Lake. 1938. Oil on panel.

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Dear recruiters. I am not nervous when you call. I am just always in the middle of pooping when I get the jumpscare of "oh shit I better answer this or they won't call again" and am both high on adrenalin and frantically trying to wipe and pull up my pants while making no noise whatsoever that you could hear.

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The house, a hybrid between a horse and a mouse.

­

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I used to think so, but after living with a supermarket within ten minutes of walking I think that's the new gold standard for me.

Access to some variety of convenience store selling slightly overpriced staples and impulse-buy snack food at 11pm on a Wednesday within walking distance is an absolutely vital part of a livable neighborhood. Not enough people are talking about this.

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when she says she doesn’t send nudes

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This child who came to my house tonight is literally the funniest human being on the planet. She complimented me on having both lollipops and mini Three Musketeers available because "a lot of houses these days don't give you a fruit flavor option." She was very solemn about this.

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Explain yourself.

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