featherwinglove-blog

[featherwinglove-blog]

God on Facade

This is the one that WordPress ate, leading me to abandon my WordPress blog, http://featherwinglove.wordpress.com for the exact same reason I had to abandon http://featherwinglove.blogspot.com four years ago.

Two days ago, God introduced me to Facade, Track 13 of the 2008 Disturbed album, in a whole new way.  I had heard the song before (early 2009, actually) but it did not flag at that time.  It flagged yesterday.  The following lyrics are my audio transcription with changes from heard audio emphasized (disagreements between the audio I heard and the liner notes or any other lyrics page or video regarding this song are not emphasized... partly because I couldn't find any that agree anyway.)

--------

No one knows just what has become of her Shattered doll, desperate, oh so innocent and delicate But too damn obdurate to write it off, to let him go Broken down, hurt again, it never ends Frightened and trembling: Did she fall again, an accident? Her eyes encircled in, black again I can't believe that she's still with him!

For how long will you try? How long until you walk away? Your facade can't disguise the fact that you're in misery.

Look inside: see what has become of her Hiding within again, can she pick herself up again? It's just too difficult and arduous to let him go Homicide flashes through her mind again No more pain, take control: If he raises his hand again, She'll find the freedom in killing him The World will see that she's had enough!

For how long will you try? How long until you walk away? Your facade can't disguise the fact you're in misery! For how long will you try? How long until you walk away? Please my child, don't deny the monster: you don't have to stay!

(Great solo, Donegan!  Keep up the awesomeness!)

For how long will you try? How long until you walk away? Your facade can't disguise the fact you're in misery! For how long will you try? How long until you walk away? Please my child, don't deny the monster: you don't have to stay!

--------

For the first changes: "But too damn obdurate to write it off, to let him go" appears in most lyrics listings and videos as "Too damn obdurate and obstinate to let it go".  This was clearly different than what is sung on the track: "But too damn obdurate to nothing it, to let him go" is what I heard clearly.  I think "nothing it" might be a a slip of the tongue that either got missed or they got sick of trying to get it perfect in the studio (I've noticed that Draiman tends to sing "properly" more in concert than he "rocks", that rough style, quite possibly because his voice would burn out too quickly.  I can sing properly for hours on end, but I can only "rock", which I totally suck at by the way, for a few minutes before my throat is sore and I start going hoarse.  That could be a factor.)  So, rather than go with "obdurate and obstinate" which is pretty redundant for a stubborn, pig-headed, gung ho grammar cop like myself (lol), I translated "nothing it" into "write it off."

I was troubled by the line "From the look in your eyes, I know you bleed internally."  It doesn't make any spiritual sense (especially with God's new context for the song), and physically, it is catastrophic enough that part of my mind is screaming "Quit singing and call an ambulance!!"  I prayed for a replacement line and got the concept of "You don't have to stay" immediately.  I sounded it out for just a couple of minutes before the lyric in the song above got stuck in my head for the next five hours.

There are two ways to look at this song.  The first is the straightforward battered wife scenario.  A bit like Garth Brooks' The Thunder Rolls on rock (note: the homicide mentioned in this song is actually depicted in the country song's official music video.)  In this scenario, the character singing is her father on earth.

Father in heaven is singing about His church.  It is a very interesting coincidence that my roommate handed me a book by John MacArthur called "The Jesus You Can't Ignore" just a few minutes after God started singing Facade this way.  It is a book about how the evangelical church has gone soft, adopting the political correctness as the world demands.

God made it abundantly clear by referencing Revelation 18:4 at the same time: "Come out of her my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, that ye taste not of her plagues" ...yeah, I know "receive" is in the King James Version, but I think God wants to emphasize that this bitch has a lot coming to her, and you don't want the tiniest morsel.

But the song is about a woman with a man, is it not?  Babylon, the church anthropomorphized as the woman above (that happens a lot in Biblical prophesy: if you see a woman in a prophetic text, she is usually a church of some description) is Shaitan's church.  So this song is about God's church spending too much time with Shaitan and getting beat up for it.  Homicide is a bad response as well, for she can't actually do that, and trying to kill a spirit is self-defeating.  The battle is over the hearts and minds of men.  We might be fighting Babylon and Shaitan, but we are fighting for the battlefield, not the victory.  We can't get the victory because Shaitan is a spirit we can't kill, while Babylon would not be won over by such an act.  Also, eternal victory is already ours, and that's the main weapon in the current war.  (I could double the size of this blog with scripture references, by the way; I'll let you know my favorites are Ephesians 6:12-13 and 1 John 4:1-6.  Also, please read the latter in the King James Version or another Bible based on the whole Textus Receptus, as most modern Bibles leave out the "in the flesh" concept of Jesus Christ in this and many other passages.  Apparently, the Great Library in Alexandria, Egypt was burned to the ground hundreds of years ago over these omissions... an early "homicide", perhaps?)

That should be enough to think about for one blog entry!!

[featherwinglove-blog]

WTFQRCodes is my favorite blog, but my Dashboard can't seen to find it to follow it (scratches head).  Anyway, they accepted my submission for something really funny and strange that I found on Google Books.  After seeing another reblog, I did realize that I clicked on the original QR code expecting to land on a mobile website, which is how I would have done it.  Hopefully, that's where the actual QR code leads, but I'm too lazy to test it (I don't have a smartphone, so it would be too much of a pain given my interest in QR codes only for entertainment value.)  If that's how it actually worked, I wouldn't have submitted it, and probably wouldn't have fallen over laughing until I could hardly breathe, see, and had sore abs.  Check out the blog, it has QR knitting, QR cupcakes, QR trucks, QR menus, QR cows, QR tattoos, QR windows, QR subway billboards, QR highway signs, etc..  This is how I found out about Facebook's otherwise famous QR roof.

[featherwinglove-blog]

The Autumn Rain

Post date: 2012 April 6

Today, I looked up Air France 447, the Airbus A330's first fatality accident.  On 2009 June 1, this aircraft mysteriously crashed into the sea...  I already knew the details of Colgan 3407, a Bombardier Dash 8 Q400 twin prop that crashed into Buffalo, NY on 2009 February 12.  The details of Air France 447 have come to light only recently, since it was very difficult to find the recorders ("black boxes") in the three mile deep sea.  Two very different aircraft, two very different places of the Earth, two very different flight conditions, two very different investigations, yet full of astonishing similarity.

1. Both aircraft were initially thought to be claimed by icing.

2. It actually turned out that both aircraft crashed because their crews were maintaining (much more successfully in Air France 447's case) wings-level stalls from their intended altitudes to the surface.

3. Both plane crashes have attached themselves by coincidence with the Eternal Tears of Sorrow song, Tears of Autumn Rain and my own fictional story of a plane crash that got the name Autumn Rain from a different song.

Before these events began, I did have a sufficient understanding of aerodynamics and flying that if I were a passenger of either of these flights and had either visual or instrumental information about the situation, I would have died very confused and upset about the crew's behaviour and flying.  This knowledge is also applicable to airborne featherwings and birds.

On 2009 February 1, the strange mantle of Featherwing Love descended on my shoulders as I had the first vision of the featherwings flying while listening to the Cascada song Everytime We Touch.  The pair had just been married and were messing around in the air, dancing and playing.  I began to understand how these wings worked.  (Note: It is an Ayashi no Ceres AMV because this exact video was what I was listening to when I got the vision.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS9eMpRJG5c

On 2009 February 10, I came up with a story concept that a featherwing being would be on an airliner as it crashed into a mountainside.  The aircraft was actually brought down by icing in a storm on the leading edge of an dreadfully cold high pressure system.  All those who survived the plane's impact soon succumbed to the -45degC weather that night, according to history.  Actually, one human survived the impact nearly unscathed, the plane's aerodynamicist happened to be on a business trip.  He saw the problem that downed the aircraft and had already come up with a simple modification to prevent a similar tragedy, so he was motivated to survive.  The featherwing, a lady, survived the impact, but with major injuries; they wouldn't be life threatening under more normal circumstances.  The man is quite astonished to encounter this injured pseudo-angel with her wings out, lamenting how the aircraft died, as featherwings are natural aerodynamicists.  With the man, wet from the freezing rain that downed the aircraft tucked under her wings for warmth, they briefly co-miserate the demise of the aircraft I later named Autumn Rain.  The featherwing woman can't build a shelter because of her injuries.  The man can't because they have no clothes adequate to protecting him from the cold long enough for him to do so.  Fortunately, the featherwing is a virgin and has the option of sharing her wings with him, transforming him into an uninjured featherwing who can easily build them a shelter...

On 2009 Febuary 12, Colgan 3407, an aircraft very similar to the one I had thought of two days earlier, with the same number of people on board (55), crashes in Buffalo, New York, initially thought to be brought down by wing icing, the same cause as I had thought of.  Despite this coincidence, I thought nothing of it; my eyes were closed to the idea that this coincidence had any significance to me.

On 2009 February 18, Eternal Tears of Sorrow released the single, Tears of Autumn Rain.  I did not know this at the time.  (The original click was uploaded on 2009 February 4, and I can no longer find it.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtMUp3FLcxY

Sometime in March, before I had adopted the discipline of dating everything that I write, I noticed the resemblance between the relationship of the story's characters and the Cascada song Dream on Dreamer and thus named the aircraft after the opening line, "The Autumn Rain is falling down / through the clouds, hits the ground..."  By this point, I had purchased both Cascada albums that were available at the time (they shortly afterwards released a third, Evacuate The Dance Floor, the title song of which described a different story I had written before I encountered it.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFtEIfQ6HBQ

I lost the original encounter record, but I'm pretty sure it was on 2009 May 26 that I first searched for "Autumn Rain" on Youtube, and thus found Tears of Autumn Rain.  This was the third coincident encounter, and so I was just starting to take notice of the coincident encounters (which now number about forty, perhaps I should make a concerted effort to dredge my notes and come up with an exact number.)  Thus, I encountered Tears of Autumn Rain, which describes the plane crash story astonishingly well, with exception to the line, "Words of blood on shore" because my story was about an inland plane crash.

On 2009 June 1, Air France 447, an Airbus A330 with 228 people on board crashes into the South Atlantic.  I'm still getting over it.

In the case of Colgan 3407, the aircraft's recorders were recovered almost immediately.  The pilots turned out to be rather dim bulbs in the box, as they didn't note how the lowering of the landing gear introduced a drag they needed to compensate for by either lowering the nose or increasing power.  The airspeed went down until the stall alarms went off, at which point they unwisely pulled back on the stick, putting the plane into a proper stall, which they maintained despite the stick pushers and shakers.  They maintained this stall until shortly before impact 25 seconds later.

The Air France 447 investigation, on the other hand, had little to go on for the next two years, but it was suspected that the pitot tubes had iced up and caused the autopilot and autothrust programs to switch off.  A skilled crew could easily save the aircraft using standard procedures (flying with throttle and pitch, which I've done in Orbiter), but it was soon apparent that if the pitot tubes iced up and caused messages, the average crew might take too long to respond.  I learned this from the BBC show Lost today.  A skilled US Air Force Colonel was only barely able to recover from the incipient spin that could have resulted, losing 19000ft of altitude.  If the crew hadn't taken control of the plane immediately, and the aircraft went into a banking stall, it is unlikely to recover.  (Note: both types are designed so that they cannot develop spins from banking stalls or incipient spins, so if it happens while the pilot is AFK, the aircraft will recover into a dive.  This happened to the Dash 8 Q400 when the pilots gave up and let go of the controls.)

Unfortunately, after the recorders from Air France 447 were recovered, it turned out that her crew was just as dim as that of Colgan 3407, which scares me.  A stall warning sounds due to a sudden downdraft.  This kicked off the automatic systems and the pilot took the controls.  The captain was on break at the time, but rushed back to the cockpit.  The autothrust program had left the throttles just a little bit on the low side for maintaining airspeed, and thus the same thing happened as to 3407, the airspeed dropped until the aircraft stalled.  After she stalled, the autopilot program began to reject the pitot tube data, leading to the telemetered messages that led investigators to believe they had iced.  It was doing this because at high angles of attack, the wind coming at the pitot is no longer direct enough to produce a reliable airspeed indication.  The crew then maintained the stall and wings level until they crashed three and a half minutes later.  What is odd is that the stall warnings were intermittent, so it appears that the crew may not have believed they were in a stall, or may have believed that they had recovered from it.  Why I still call them just as dim as the Colgan 3407 pilots is because the altimeter was spinning backwards at some 10,000ft/min, and I'd be rather suspicious if that were happening while my nose was 16deg above the horizon, even if no warnings were sounding at all.

This is not how the aircraft in my story crashed.  The Autumn Rain crashed due to a real icing problem jamming her ailerons.  Its controls were directly linked, so the stick quit moving left and right.  Her crew dies pounding on the stick trying to break it loose.  I later read of a Dash 8 aircraft having a similar (not identical) problem in 1996.  By this point, I had already decided that the Autumn Rain crash was a historical event in Featherwing Love's main plot, setting it in this time period, which works out wonderfully.

I felt a need to put this post up to honor the 283 real casualties, and the message that cries out to me from their blood.

[featherwinglove-blog]

Commentary on Bill Wiese 23 Minutes in Hell / 23 Questions About Hell:

Terry Courage 120101

981123 03:00 to 03:23 local, Bill Wiese had an OBE where he experienced hell, and, as he emphasizes, it was extremely consistent with what is found in the Bible.  Being a considerably more recent work, FHD Remix: Three Worlds In One, turned out to be very consistent with his vision.  Most of the information in FHD Remix regarding hell come from two of its constituent worlds, Haibane Renmei (Areole Secret Factory; Yoshitoshi ABe 2003) and Doom 3 (Id Software 2004, the twentieth stage is hell), and the elaborations I have are, by my design, perfectly compatible with both of these worlds.  They also turned out, by coincidence, to be perfectly compatible with all OBE/NDE hell testimonies that I have seen, heard, or read since (Paul Yong Gyu, Angelica Zambrano, Bill Wiese, and several others.)  Not bad for a work of fiction.

The remaining world of FHD Remix: Three Worlds In One is Featherwing Love, my own work, which I believe is a depiction on what heaven on earth would be like according to Matthew 6:10.  The reason I say "heaven on earth" and not "heaven" without qualification is because monogamy is very important to featherwing beings, without which their wings would be destroyed.  Matthew 22:30 indicates that eternal heaven is different in this regard.

The following cites comparisons between the testimony of Bill Wiese at the above Youtube embed, times given for that video, and information regarding FHD Remix will be quoted from the Haibaniki Edition of FHD Remix: Three Worlds In One located at:

http://haibaniki.rubychan.de/wiki/FHD_Remix

Doom 3 information will come from Cyric1983's walkthrough on Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFdSz_qLmBw&list=PL9C1377B55290C0AF

Consistent information from Haibane Renmei is elaborated in the first episode's overview of that world, for which, only the times for that single video will be given:

http://www.watchanimeon.com/haibane-renmei-episode-1/

ALL CAPS is used the same way as in the New American Standard Bible when Jesus was quoting from His scriptures (i.e.: what we call the Old Testament, the Bible as it existed in His time on Earth.)  Here it denotes when Wiese is quoting scripture.

Background: This stage is equipped with an XV-88 synthesizer keyboard, while the Doom 3 rifle is designated the MG-88 Enforcer.  A cute coincidence, since "88" apparently has no special significance (i.e.: Revelation 8:8 appears to be about an oceanic asteroid impact.)

Wiese 10:42: "Suddenly, I was pulled out of my body, and found myself falling through the air, and I landed in a prison cell in hell."

Doom 3 #60 "Welcome To Hell" 1:33 to 1:52

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MagvZPvC_Bc

Wiese 10:58 "And this prison cell was filthy, stinking, dirty, smoke filled, rough-hewn stone walls and bars."

Doom 3 #61 "Hell: Part 2" 0:00 to 3:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKbv1GxhhKg

Wiese 12:50 "I looked up and saw these two enormous beasts ... reptilish in appearance, bumps and scales all over the one's body.  Huge jaws, sunken in eyes, claws about a foot long.  These particular two were about twelve or thirteen feet tall ... These two were pacing in the cell like a caged animal ... the one picked me up and threw me into the wall, like I weighed the weight of a water glass."

Doom 3 #59 "Delta Labs 4" 8:50 to 9:22

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r30SlYQhXgo

Wiese 14:06 "...and the other one picked me up, and dug its claws into my chest and just tore the flesh open.  It hung like rivens, I couldn't believe.  How could I be alive, I should be dead from these wounds."

Doom 3 #60 "Welcome To Hell" 1:52 to 2:04

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MagvZPvC_Bc

Wiese 15:14 "I was listening to the screams all this time ... I looked through the flames and this is where I could first see people  ... There were people literally inside this pit, in the flames burning."

Doom 3 #60 "Welcome To Hell" 6:19 to 8:35

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MagvZPvC_Bc

Wiese 17:18 "Down deep in the Earth, I understood that there were different levels of torment.  I don't know what level I was in, but I understood that there were different degrees of punishment and levels of torment ... The point is that there is no comfortable, nice level in hell."

Haibane Renmei #1 17:11 to 18:38 "It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts!  Bite on this!  Save your tongue!  ... My limbs are cold and heavy.  The wings on my back twitch and every time, pain shoots through my shoulders and sides.  I feel my wings becoming a part of my body.  I'm afraid my body is being turned into something else.  Sweat stings my eyes, and I can't see anything." [Glie is probably far milder than the mildest level of hell.]

http://www.watchanimeon.com/haibane-renmei-episode-1/

Wiese 19:02 "But also add to it sulfur [presumably hydrogen sulfide, or H2S], and sulfur is actually toxic to breathe ... that's what you're breathing in hell ... you don't have enough air to breath in hell.  You have to fight and gasp for even the tiniest bit of air and maybe only an asthma patient can relate to this, but, I'll demonstrate to you.  This is how you breathe in hell. it was like: *gasp* *gasp* *gasp* and that's as much air as you can get.  [The tidal volume appears to be about 0.5L, or about an eighth of the average person while relaxing.]  So any moment you felt like, I'm gonna die, I don't have enough oxygen, but you keep going. ... You need to sleep in hell ... For all eternity, you never get to go to sleep. ... no rest from the torments, but no rest of any kind."

Doom 3 #61 "Hell: Part 2" 6:31: "Many individuals have reported a lack of being tired, and some work constantly without the need for rest." [In the context of other, much more negative effects in the game, it is clear that this is from an inability to rest, and that these particular UAC workers are not suffering both because they have environmental suits and because they are in hell for only a few hours in bodies that are still alive.]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKbv1GxhhKg

Wiese 20:20: "You have no purpose, no destiny. ... THERE IS NO WORK, NOR DEVICE, NOR KNOWLEDGE, NOR WISDOM IN [hell] ... It's just a complete useless wasting away and it doesn't matter who you are.  If you're somebody famous here, no one would know who you are there.  You're completely lost and alone ...  YOU'RE NAME IS COVERED IN DARKNESS ... You're forgotten in hell ... No one will remember you in hell.  It's confusion in turmoil and hell ... EVERLASTING CONFUSION ... A LAND WITHOUT ANY ORDER."

Haibane Renmei #1 16:14 to 16:55

"Are we not human?"  "Nobody knows what we are.  For need of a name, we call ourselves ashfeathers."  "I want to go home."  "An ashfeather is never allowed outside the town.  Besides, even if your family was somewhere in this world, they wouldn't recognize you if they saw you."  "Why not?"  "As you cannot remember the world you used to be in, nobody in this world remembers you."  [In the original series, nothing is known about what is outside the wall surrounding the town of Glie, but in FHD Remix, the entire Earth right up to the wall's base has been taken over by the forces of hell as depicted in Doom 3, and, apparently even in the anime series, they occasionally get inside.]

http://www.watchanimeon.com/haibane-renmei-episode-1/

Wiese 25:06 "The demons hate you.  You never get to see your loved ones, even though you saw people all in that pit of fire all close together.  It's not like that in reality.  You're all kept apart and isolated. ... There's pleasure in being with somebody, right?  And having conversation.  You don't get to do that in hell.  You're kept in the dark and isolated for all eternity."

Doom 3 #60 "Welcome To Hell" 6:19 to 8:35 (given before)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MagvZPvC_Bc

FHD Remix Chapter 25: Sortie To Hell:  "Streams of lost spirits circle in the chaos around her, crying for water, crying for companionship. It is bizarre: despite that she can see thousands of these sorry incorporeal creatures, many of them right next to each other, each is totally alone, unable to sense any of the others ... a horrible way to spend eternity."

http://haibaniki.rubychan.de/wiki/FHD_Remix_Chapter_25

Wiese 25:59 "God prepared a place: He just withdrew His attributes. ... Remove God from a situation, or He removes Himself, and all the good goes with Him."

FHD Remix Chapter 24: Gates of Hell: "God smiles, she feels His warmth. / Tatakai, grumpy as ever, raises a captured chaingun to clear the mother of all jams in its feed, a jam which probably saved her from having to take another transfusion ... she casually knocks the chaingun onto the floor. / God seems proud of her. / She activates the teleporter ... She sees a tunnel of blood and hears the cries of those forever lost. / God is gone. / Tatakai materializes in the sector's armory and jumps off the pad, alert and ready, but truly, profoundly frightened for the first time since she got to Mars. She breathes a sigh of relief as she realizes: / God is back."

http://haibaniki.rubychan.de/wiki/FHD_Remix_Chapter_24

[Here there is an enormous edit cut where I believe he described creatures called Pinky, Trite, and Vagary in Doom 3.  He did this in the equivalent section of an earlier presentation, but did not assign these names to the types of demons he saw.]

Wiese 28:34 "And I thought, Lord, why did You send me to this place? ... And he wanted me to go and tell people because a lot of the churches are not teaching the truth about hell. ... [30:04]  Lord, why did you pick me? ... He's given us all a job to do.  Everyone has a job to do for the Lord and no one is more important than anybody else.  We're all equally as important.  And you know, I was uncomfortable for seven years giving this testimony, extremely uncomfortable.  And I complained, and the Lord said to me, 'Bill, it's not about you being comfortable, it's about you being obedient."

FHD Remix Chapter 4: The Final War Begins: " 'God!' she cries aloud, 'I'm just not cut out for this, why did you bring me here?' / 'Remember who you're talking to, Tatakai,' her Saviour answers, 'I created you myself. And like it or not, you are cut out for this. Get used to it.'"

http://haibaniki.rubychan.de/wiki/FHD_Remix_Chapter_4

[Note: This is the first time anyone had ever personally referred to her as Tatakai, the Japanese word for Battle.  As I had written this, this event occurs in the elevator between the second and third stages of Doom 3.  In real life, it is in the last post on featherwinglove.blogspot.com, which crashed a few days later.  Two days after that blog crashed, I heard a song for the first time which contained the lyric "My flower withered between the pages two and three" along with four other highly specific points about the plot of the story and this character.  Similar calling revelations in my own life were given in my life in 2002 December, 2009 May, and 2011 May, so I have a pretty good idea what she's going through.]

Wiese 29:18 "And I thought, Lord, why do those demons hate me so much?  He said, because YOU'RE MADE IN MY IMAGE and they hate me ... THEY HATED ME BEFORE THEY HATED YOU."

I can't find the exact spot in FHD Remix where the desire of the forces of hell, once they are established on Earth in physical form, desire only to utterly destroy all human life, a task they begin to undertake in 2156 March.  They desire to do so for the same reason given by Bill Wiese.

Wiese 37:19 "So there's a penalty to pay for our sin.  But Jesus paid that penalty ... He paid it.  You can either let Him pay it, or you can. ... But you see, you could never pay it ... Time in hell would never suffice ... We're saved by grace through faith."

FHD Remix 41: I'll Go Fill The Tub: "'-someone pure and perfect,' Akanasu continues, 'Had to show us, had to pay the price. Had to die,' she sighs. 'There is more.' The room remains quiet as Akanasu digests what God is telling her heart. 'He had to rise from his death to show that we could do the same: rise from the death of our sin.' / 'His death erases the record!' another of the kids with the new white wings says. Menmo smiles, knowing that he refers to the little chalkboards that each kid has in the classroom. When one did something wrong, it was written on his 'record', and he had to do something to make up for it before it could be erased."

http://haibaniki.rubychan.de/wiki/FHD_Remix_Chapter_41

[featherwinglove-blog]

Where The Fence Is Low lyrics

Where the fence is low

And the water is rising

 And the fire comes down

And the dark fills the skies in

My foot on the ledge

I'm feeling for safety

Somewhere between sure

And I don't know, maybe

I'm off on my road here

I'm off on my own here

I find my hope here

I'm off on my own here

I'm off on my rope where

The fence is low

Where the fence is low

Where the fence is low

In the shadow I walk

To the ends of the forest

And the shape of the hands

Will break the ground for us

The fear that consumes

And burns up the bright sun

I've been here before

The edge, and I'm guessing

I'm off on my road here

I'm off on my own here

I find my hope here

I'm off on my own here

I'm off on my rope where

The fence is low

Where the fence is low

Where the fence is low

(chorus runs again after a bridge of "Lo-o-ow"s)

P.S.: This song coincides with a story that I'm writing, and at just one day, is one of the closest ever.  IMHO, this song is about how a little girl named Alberta survives a nuclear explosion because she happened to be in a pool at the moment it goes off.

[featherwinglove-blog]

lightsalot:

Hey. I don’t mean to alarm you, but….NEW SONG!! This is the first anyone’s heard from my new record. I’ve been waiting for this! “Everybody Breaks A Glass” feat. Holy Fuck and Shad. http://music.iamlights.com Lights.

Lyrics:

It's not a solid, not as soft thing

To pull the wool up like a smokescreen

Nobody does it like a prophet

It's gone before you know you lost it

The worry's on to keep your hands tight

There's certain things you shouldn't have tried

So if you gotta tell me something

You better go from the beginning

We all forget to sleep, and crouch at someone's feet

Everybody skips a beat

We let the chances pass, the field we hold so fast

Everybody breaks a glass

And here we're standing, and letting go

Not just a little, but up in full

Wondering how I got a head cold

Wishing I didn't know what I know

It's never been about the money

We're worthy or we are not worthy

However much you got on your plate

You're as good as you reciprocate

We all pretend to keep our tongue out of our cheek

Everyone's the fool they seek

We all go off the track, and feel for all laid back

Everybody breaks a glass

Everybody breaks a glass

Yeah

Shucks, scared of luck appears when you peer back

It's weird how we fear that

It's weird how we wear masks

It appears that we fear our own tears more than tear gas

My team's struggled in the years past

Looking to draft beer to bring the cheers back

But when the drinking gang's finished drunk

It's just a clear glass, you know, real image mirror back

The places that we go to cope are so strange when we're old

And folks that don't change trying to hang. We don't know the ropes

When we fall, we get more than our shoulders broke. It's no game.

That's why we overdose on cocaine, get it where it's comatose, there's no blame.

If you've ever known shame, known pain, known days where you really don't feel okay.

Uh.

Somewhere perfection lies, but not for you and I

{Everybody trips sometimes}

Everybody trips sometimes

When cities fall like shacks, walls eventually crack

{Everybody breaks a glass}

Everybody breaks a glass

NEW Song "Everybody Breaks A Glass"

[featherwinglove-blog]

The Fence Is Low

I can't say a whole lot about the story I just wrote.  I don't want to spoil a potential commercial novel, but so far, I've had two coincidences.  The first was a pair of articles on the same page (p. 22) in Laptop Magazine's 2011 May issue, just six days after I started a novel about surviving a nuclear war.

Alberta is a teenage girl who appeared in the story as I was writing in the moments before I noticed the Fluor Rope Square ad that I filmed and put on my Youtube channel.  It was for Lights' (@lightsalot) concert at the Calgary Stampede the following evening, starting exactly thirty-seven hours and fourteen minutes after I filmed the ad (My RYT had only seven views by then, sigh.)  I did not yet know that three of her new 2011 album songs were already on the loose, first performances on 2011 June 18 at the Utopia Festival in Edmonton.  (This was the day before I quit handwriting the new novel because of a spill on my computer's keyboard.  When I hear the Storyvoice, I write.  Period.  Like Lights herself tweets, "Record's done, but I'm right back in here [in the studio; http://twitpic.com/5pryfa]. As long as it's flowing, don't stop showing! I just made that up." - 2011 July 13)

On 2011 July 15 (i.e.: yesterday and I've already two more chapters), I wrote just how Alberta survives the explosion.  She's at a fenced pool at a recreation centre, and goes off the diving board.  The bomb goes off six kilometres north of her just as she enters the water.  While under the water, she watches as the shallow end boils in the sun.  Odd, she thinks, the sun is supposed to be that way.  She looks, and sees it just in time for Prandtl–Glauert cloud behind the blast wave blot the sun out.  She emerges from the pool into a new world: the apocalyptic aftermath of a nuclear explosion.  One of the explosion's effects was blowing away the pool's privacy fence to the north.  Through it she can see the explosion's still glowing mushroom cloud.  The story's ultimate purpose is to show how the impromptu (and very imperfect) community of survivors spring up around the city's only surviving hospital, and their job is more complicated than mere survival (I'm still figuring all that out.)

The next day, I heard "The Fence Is Low" by Lights for the first time.  That was about an hour ago.  I'm still kinda trying to recover, and I'm running out of time for this post.  I wish my fingers would quit shaking so I could type faster.  My first click was on some amateur Utopia Festival upload I couldn't make out a word of, but I could feel that there was something special about this song (I call it a "flag", and so far, only one has been inconclusive out of, I'd guess about fifty, including the moment I first heard Lights' voice on the radio just over 2996 hours ago.)  Once I could hear the words, this is how it opens.  It took me several listens to realize that the song was indeed, about my character Alberta.  Surprising, since the description is salient on every single line!!

"Where the fence is low, And the water is rising, And the fire comes down, And the dark fills the skies in, My foot on the ledge, I'm feeling for safety, Somewhere between sure, And I don't know, maybe."

It hit me at exactly 10:56, an hour ago, and I've been in tears ever since.  The second verse is about part of the story that I can foresee, but haven't written yet, possibly an epilogue or (God, I hope not!) a second explosion.  This is what Lights thinks of the song, and it speaks towards the common inspiration mechanism I believe is causing all these coincidences (this is the latest of about forty, and the second for this novel, which I started just 34 days ago!)

"This is about (I've got a keyboard chart here) I kept having these dream over and over and over again- You ever had those dreams where you've go somewhere that you've been before?  I've totally been here! but it's in your dream.  So you haven't technically been there but you have!" Blue Mountain 2011 July 2

"This song's about this recurring dream that I have all the time and it kinda just wrote itself, because it's a place you go.  Right, I'm sure you have those places you've been in your dreams before, and you're like Oh I'm here." (someone screams "At your concert!") "That's your dream?  Touche!!"  Utopia 2011 June 18

That's it for now.

[featherwinglove-blog]

In The Dark I See by Lights Poxleitner ( @lightsalot ) 110601 approx. 11:00 MDT

Here, in the stillness, the quiet place

Where I'm lying with a downturned face,

You come and distract me from what's coming at me.

Give me something to look forward to.

Truth be told, sometimes it's only You.

Nothing is at stake here, when We are awake here

It's You who brings the morning,

And You who takes the sun when I see

You're the only one who stuck around for me

When I was losing faith in what I thought I would be

You're the only One in the dark I see

The dark I see

The dark I see

I know I lose my heart so easily

Trying to only show the best of me

I go into hiding each time I stop trying

Oh, You remind me of the little things

'Til I forget the part that's troubling

And I feel so much better when We are together

It's You who brings the morning,

And You who takes the sun when I see

You're the only one who stuck around for me

When I was losing faith in what I thought I would be

You're the only One in the dark I see

The dark I see

The dark I see

'Cus it's You who brings the morning,

And You who takes the sun when I see

You're the only one who stuck around for me

When I was losing faith in what I thought I would be

You're the only one in the dark I see

[featherwinglove-blog]

The One That Crashed

When my first Featherwing Love blog, at featherwinglove.blogspot.com crashed, I had this sneaking suspicion that God had crashed the editor and completely erased what I had written due to the content of that blog post.  That was despite the fact that the story was coming from God.  Repeatedly, I tried to complete the post, and repeatedly, it failed.  I now listen carefully to whether God wants something I've written to be released, and when.  I also have never revealed what that post I was working on that day, 2009 August 6 was, two days before I encountered a song about the one before (see my Nemo post on this blog for details on that miraculous coincidence of story and song.)  Until now.  I now know why that blog crashed, or at least why God didn't want me to put that material online:

It sucked.

It's not my fault either, but "one day" God was going to show me "something extraordinary.  A miracle."  Had I seen it coming, I might have asked, "What [is] it?"  He would have answered, "That'll have to wait 'til next time.  I gotta get to work."  It wasn't the right day, the right time.

I knew it was the right moment when I saw the featherwing deployment I had written for that post an hour, forty-three minutes, and fifty-five seconds into the sequel of the movie I was introducing Featherwing Love to, by which point the miracle this movie was had become plainly obvious to me.  The movie did not exist at the time I wrote that post, and I'm certain this deployment had not yet been rendered.  This was the Youtube upload that started me down the road to attempting that post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxolhNz6n4o

In the post, I followed the plot of the original Tron movie (Disney 1982), where instead of Kevin Flynn, we have timid Amy being convinced to help Alan and Lora hack into Encom's computers.  She has an angelic streak of creativity that they need, and it starts to come in handy once she has been digitized.  She's not as good on a lightcycle, but she is a far more brilliant programmer.  After she, RAM and TRON escape the arena, she drives right off the cliff.  Literally on the fly, she programs featherered wings to come out of her sides, and furls the light cycle.  Such is the power of the Users, the Gods of the Grid.

I was astonished at how close the lightshade deployment sequence was, but that was of little significance compared to the other concepts.  Including when the love of the story's father character penetrates the lost TRON two minutes later.  It also affirmed that the Users really were the Gods of the Grid, but...

- Kevin Flynn is not even the master of his own universe, as the sudden appearance of the isomorphs indicate.  The isomorphs are remarkably consistent with Adam and Eve, and are remarkably consistent with the haibane and Toga of the world of Haibane Renmei.  The God I know is in charge, even of the Grid, a human-made construct inside a human-made fictional world!

- CLU is a snapshot of Kevin Flynn as he was in 1985, and at that time, CLU ceased to mature as a human, while Kevin Flynn went on.  About five minutes into the movie, 1985 Kevin Flynn cries to the crowd, "In there is a new world.  In there is our future.  In there is our destiny."  "Out there is a new world.  Out there is our victory.  Out there is our destiny," says 2011 CLU ninety-five minutes later.  Jeff Bridges illustrates in two characters how a man can become a monster when he refuses to grow, and how a child can become a saint by refusing to stop growing.  2011 Kevin Flynn is remarkably similar to 1978 Scott Peck, a Zen Buddhist with the gospel right in front of him...

- The relationship of Kevin Flynn, Sam Flynn, and Quorra in the Grid of Tron Legacy is an analog of the Father, the Son, and the bride of Christ.  The Father gave His only begotten son in His love for us, to rise again and be the husband of the adopted humanity.  Like the Christians of real life, Quorra's kind, the isomorphs were hunted to extinction, and survived with the Father's help.  Unlike in the Gospel, the son didn't die, but like in the Gospel, the Father dies to cleanse the sin of His creation, just like at the end of this movie.  There is a unity between the Saviour and the Father in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Unlike in the movie, the Father comes back too.

CLU disappoints me as a person, but not terribly so.  I see him all around me.  It makes me wish this world were CLU-less.  Think of what we know of the universe: a new type of galaxy was recently discovered.  Galaxies do not come small, our own is a hundred thousand light-years across yet we know almost nothing about them.  Sure, we might know a lot (like how to blow ourselves off the planet in a matter of hours), but what don't we know?  When we, all humanity, realize just how clueless we are, then we'll really be CLU-less.

What disappointed me the most about CLU as a character concept, is that in the original Tron, he was a good guy: Kevin sent him in to retrieve his file right at the beginning of the movie.  MCP executed him for the attempt, in a way that resembles crucifixion.  I miss that version of CLU.

[featherwinglove-blog]

Face Up, Jesus

I think the Lights song that is closest to Jesus' heart is not "Saviour," or "I Owe You One," or "Drive My Soul," as a typical Christian. I think the Lights song that gets closest to the heart of Jesus Christ is actually "Face Up". This is why:

----

He walks along through the dark. It is cloudy and starless. He cries. Suddenly he catches his foot upon a root and stumbles. He decides for the moment that he's better off to lie there, curled up in the sparse grass and last year's leaves. What he said, no person could possibly have understood if he had heard it at the time. He told his followers later that he had said this:

"Oh Father ... Please, could it be that you would let this portion pass from my hands. But if not, I will do your will."

"You?" she whispers. She kneels, takes him by the shoulders and rights him up to his knees. He won't stop crying. "I am honored," she squeaks, "I am so honored."

She deploys her wings and wraps her left wing around him and pulls him close to her side. "It was so dark, I didn't think it would be so easy to find you."

"How?" she thinks he said, but the word is so distorted through his grief that it is mostly a guess.

"Your trail glows, Master," she answers, "and your followers behind you. Your sweat, and the cup you left in the dinner hall. I spotted all this from the air, and came down to see."

She closes her eyes and listens to his crying, but she can't understand a word.

On a hunch, she slowly says, "You are the Saviour, my Master. No one may open that scroll except you." She trembles, and starts crying herself, "Thank you so much. Thank you, Master," He turns to him and their eyes lock. "Thank you," she whispers.

----

I wrote this on 2010 July 18. Compare Matthew 26: 36-44, Mark 14:32-40

---- The times You don't wanna wake up

'Cus in Your sleep it's never over when You give up

The Son is always gonna rise up

You need to get up, gotta keep Your head up

Look at the people all around You

The way You feel is something everybody goes through

Dark out, but You still gotta lie up

You need to wake up, gotta keep Your face up.

----

Jesus was not killed by the cross, but by a broken heart. In medical terms, His paracardium flooded with blood plasma causing hypovolemia and not allowing the heart to rebound after a pumping stroke. This was shock caused by an extreme emotional trauma, explaining John 19:31-37. The emotional trauma was very simple: He experienced spiritual death, a separation from the Father (Matthew 27:46, Mark 15:34, Psalm 22:1-22)

Separation from God is normal for the rest of us, and this is why Jesus gave His life to become our Saviour.

This occurred to me last week, but I think there is a reason why I didn't feel moved to come out and say anything openly about "Face Up" until today. Gethsemane was on a Tuesday night. This is being posted Maundy Tuesday, 2011. It is quite obvious when you look at it, that the Passion Week tradition has the dates wrong. Easter Sunday is only two days after Good Friday, when tradition holds that Jesus was crucified. Also, He was up by the morning, and it has always been Biblical tradition (even way back in Genesis) that a new day starts at sunset, not sunrise.

The religious Jews wanted the bodies off the crosses (remember, Jesus was crucified with two petty robbers, one of which repented before Jesus expired) because a Sabbath was beginning that evening. According to John 19:31, this wasn't the weekly seventh day sabbath for which the Seventh Day Adventists named themselves, but the annual Passover Sabbath, which was on the fourth day of the week that year, Thursday in our terms. Jesus was crucified on Wednesday, was dead for Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, and rose during the night on the first day of the next week, Resurrection Sunday.

Knowing how few of the rest of us would actually come to know the Father as He did, He also might have been reluctant to crawl out of that grave and reveal Himself to the disciples (both female and male.)

This was first posted to my blog for Lights at http://www.iamlights.com/blog/featherwinglove/face-jesus

[featherwinglove-blog]

The complete adventures of Tatakai in the worlds of Featherwing Love, Haibane Renmei, and Doom 3: The First Battle of Mars.  Please start from the beginning, even if you are familiar with the old blog, as the first eight chapters have been overhauled.

[featherwinglove-blog]

On 2009 August 8, two days after my old blog at featherwinglove.blogspot.com crashed, erasing a post I had worked on for thirteen hours, I bumped into this amazingly prescient song by Nightwish.  It describes what Tatakai was going through in the elevator between the second and third stages of Doom 3, her near and distant future (in Haibane Renmei) from that point at the end of the last successful post.  I could not hold back tears as the voice of Tarja Turunen sang, "My flower withered between the pages two and three," referring both to Tatakai's innocence and the Blogspot of Featherwing Love!  From the second listen that day and ever since, I hear the story's voice (which Tarja has apparently named Ciaran) sing with Nemo's overture, "Tatakai is, Tatakai is, Tatakai is her real name."

[featherwinglove-blog]

Baba's Answer wins personal choice award in Christopher Tin's "Change The Lyrics" song for the original song, "Baba Yetu".  I claim that yes, I really hear this from Baba as an answer to the Lord's Prayer, within forty minutes of getting the invitation from Christopher Tin to enter the contest.  By the way, if you're not seeing "Baba's Answer" turn on closed captions.