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[faronvasiliev-blog]

You know I feel such tenderness for you. It’s difficult to bear. I don’t know what to do with my tenderness.

Persona (1966) dir. by Ingmar Bergman (via soracities)

[faronvasiliev-blog]

calina-s:

orionmassetti:

Dinner was in pieces. Stranded in the béarnaise sauce, congealed and milky thick. Gone cold in it’s own drippings of myoglobin and fat. Orion’s gaze tracked Faron out the glass door, into the gardens where Calina lingered in the rain. He could barely see them in the diluted, late afternoon lighting. And it was difficult to hear the conversation beneath the layer of pattering rain.

Lightning flashed, illuminating Faron’s hand, the slide of fingers on the inside of Calina’s wrist. Orion pressed his tongue into his left cheek and reached for the wine.

No alcohol with medication, Signor Massetti.

Orion filled the glass half-way. Regarded it with a tip of his head, before decidedly sloshing it to the brim. He needed it, and perhaps one more, to navigate this place–Calina’s home. Or was it Faron’s? Both? Everywhere he turned there was history. Shared bedrooms, morning rituals, old habits. And Orion seemed to knock his elbows into their intimacy, taking up too much space in rooms accustomed to two.

Perhaps he should feel guilty for unaccommodating them.

He took another sip of wine.

He didn’t.

They’d made the decision of wheeling him into their domestic space. And while he’d enjoyed (to an extent) the doting attention of Calina and Faron’s amiable tolerance–tomorrow. It would have to be tomorrow. He’d endured the role of invalid long enough.

Neither of them had asked why. About the bullet. About the uncharacteristic sentimentality. And Orion was relieved. If they did, he’d answer–all the wrong reasons.

@calina-s

Wrist slipping from his grasp, for fingers to catch on his and drift away just as quickly. “You know I hate soup.” The crinkle of her nose and the way she walks backwards for just a moment as she dances away from his grip, eyes on him, should lend some lightness to the picture. Nudge away at the weight of how she tensed. She tensed. Hopes he wont have realised, wont have questioned it the way that she did. Thinks there was a crack of thunder and a flash of lightning just before it happened, maybe enough to draw attention away, maybe enough of an excuse. Maybe she imagined it.  “Besides it’s you who needs to stay healthy.” 

Turns before she reaches the door for a reprieve. Expression obscured to both potential witnesses by the angle or the distance, the way she dips her head and twists at her hair to allow just one moment more for herself. 

Had no intention of returning to their atmosphere so soon. Except her hand is on the door handle and she’s slipped out of her shoes, pressed her barefeet into the room. It should only be polite to speak, but the things she thinks to say are far from it. So she says nothing as her gaze drifts to the wine on the table and not the man before it. Nothing as she searches through the cupboard to withdraw with a bottle of vodka.  Finally speaks as she looks at Orion, “If everyone’s drinking.” doesn’t look away as she pours the alcohol into a wine glass. It fills past the brim but is only as dramatic as the way she hovers over the table, rainwater dripping onto the surface to make the other liquid seem a more natural addition. 

@faronvasiliev

He’s smiling, still. Fondness open in his expression, a low laugh in reply to her words as she turns away. But there’s--

A slow sense of disquiet. And he lingers- a moment more than he would have- in the rain, gazing at the slope of her shoulders, the rain dripping from her fingertips. The sound of thunder, rumbling in the sky.

He shuts the door behind him when he goes in.

“If everyone is drinking,” Faron echoes, eyeing her choice to pair the remains of dinner with vodka. He sighs, moving behind Orion, dramatic exasperation in the manner he shakes his head. “See what I have to deal with, котенок.”

Sliding a palm over Orion’s hand and plucking his glass from him, taking a sip of the man’s wine. His own glass still half-full on the other side of the table. Still- it wouldn’t do to have Orion’s nurses unhappy with him again. All the while his gaze following Calina as she over pours the vodka, decidedly unimpressed by the alcohol mingling with rainwater on the table. More the rainwater. “Любовью.”

He tilts his head back and leaves the wine glass mostly empty on the table. Disappears into the downstairs bathroom to reappear with a towel. “Sit,” and then- “You’re dripping all over the hardwood.”

His palms find her shoulders, setting her down in a chair as he starts rubbing her hair dry. “You’ll be on a soup diet if you catch a cold. The price to pay for getting sick.”

@orionmassetti

[faronvasiliev-blog]

pavelsmischief:

DATE: may 14th TIME: 01:23 pm LOCATION: phoenix and the turtle cafe CLOSED: @faronvasiliev

He wasn’t inclined to track anyone that day; the city was falling apart around them all, slowly as if tainted by a poison, and he steered clear of it all for now. He himself had to regroup and adjust to the chaos brimming and see where the joy in the fire could be found.

Yet, the sight of a familiar face through his binoculars, always smiling as he delivered costly damage, caused pause. And soon Pavel was packing his items, throwing a backpack in the safeguard spot and tucking extra knives under his belt. It was dreadfully easy to scale the building and burst onto the sidewalk, walking until he slipped through the door to the cafe, no hesitance in his steps as he approached the one and only Faron Vasiliev.

Sliding in the seat opposite Faron, he lifted his feet on the next chair’s back, shooting the older man a wicked grin.

“Mind if I sit here? I’m having an awful day, and you seem like the right company to have it turn all around! You just have that air of change about you, you know?”

Verona, crumbling, is not so different in the midday sun. All the chaos that made it easy to reach through and shape his desired result in the fire- there is no fire to be found on the surface of the city. A quiet river, perhaps. Daily life unchanged. So it is in this slow cafe, peeling paint, wilting plants. Birds singing in summer.

But in the catacombs, the ancient order of things falling. Let it fall. Come time, he would mould the city to his own image.

A shadow falls over the table. Interruption. Faron glances up, entirely unperturbed to find Pavel Lam grinning down at him like a jackal. He examines the mercenary, mouth twisting to a faint smile. Alva’s little suitor.

“Always happy to help.” He cuts another slice of bacon before taking a sip of coffee. “And how exactly can I help.”

[faronvasiliev-blog]

@nikolaiborisov verona, twenty-one minutes past six.

Dusk breaking. Sun broken up in fragments all over the alley floor, on a dustbin, halfway across a forgotten bicycle chain wrapped around a post. Dashed across the arm of a man and the struggling convulsions of his unfortunate victim, slow crush of a throat in the sunset. A lovely, vermillion colour. On a low wall, an alley cat settles to watch. Black eyes, hooded with intent.

In his throat a low croon of a sound, “Ssh-” The woman- hears, does not listen. Struggles with her nails clawing at his arm. Glint of a knife on the ground, slick with nothing more than light and polished gleam. His grip tightens.

A crack of sound. The cat shudders. The tight grip of her nails drop. Body falling limp in his arms.

Better.

Gently, he lets her down. She slides into the mud without complaint, petite frame settling into the dirt, arranging itself in an unbeautiful heap. Eyes wide open.

When he looks up there’s an unexpected figure at the other end of the alley. Broken up sun and it hides the figure in a scatter of light- silhouette sharpening in slow strokes, turning to a man. He smiles to himself. Raises a palm in brief ‘hello’.

“Apologies for the mess of a conversation starter.” A smile breaking lopsided on his mouth. Stepping forward, unmindful as he treads a jacket sleeve into the ground. “Do you mind if I ask you to take care of the body for me?” There’s charisma bleeding every vowel, an ease in his speech at odds with the body cooling into rigor mortis on the alley floor. Gaze never leaving Nikolai as he moves far enough to lean against the brick wall, light a cigarette and wait for his reply.

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would have physically hurt you if you weren’t so good at ducking. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧   I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

✧

I would kill you. ✧ I would physically hurt you. ✧ I would attack you unprovoked. ✧ I would manipulate you. ✧ I dislike you. ✧ You annoy me. ✧ You scare me. ✧ You intimidate me. ✧ I hope I intimidate you. ✧ I pity you. ✧ You disgust me. ✧ I hate you. ✧ I’m indifferent toward you. ✧ I’d like to get to know you better. ✧  I’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ I’d like to be friends with you. ✧  I’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ I’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ You are my friend. ✧ You are my best friend. ✧ You are my mentor. ✧ I look up to you. ✧ I respect you. ✧ You are my hero. ✧ You inspire me. ✧ You are my enemy. ✧ You make me happy. ✧ I want to protect you. ✧ I would fight by your side. ✧ I consider you an equal. ✧ I think you are beneath me. ✧ I think you are above me. ✧ I would lie for you. ✧ I would lie to you. ✧ I would sleep with you. ✧ I would sleep by your side. ✧ I would hug you. ✧ I would kiss you. ✧ You are family to me. ✧ I would die for you. ✧ I would kill for you. ✧ I would trust you with my life. ✧ I would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ I would trust you with a secret. ✧ I would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ I love you (platonically). ✧ I love you (romantically).

[faronvasiliev-blog]

@ofgoneril​ may 10th

The screaming has stopped by the time Faron unbends his knees to stand. Slow pall of lifelessness, disease spreading. What had once been a Capulet runner. And between the tearing vocal chords and the body growing cold on the floor- there’s a presence behind him there hadn’t been before.

He runs his tongue over his teeth, examines the lukewarm corpse. Stiffness in his fingers, trapped in rigor mortis. The beginnings of sound, “Did you know-”

Rhetoric. He flexes his hand, leaves the fingers uncurled. “Left in the open,” he says, “The human body takes a few months to decompose. Skin slippage. First the tissue, then the organs. Maggots inside the body. Maybe half a year to wear down to bone.” His fingers tap an erratic beat on the side of his coat. “But I’m sure the fishes will expedite that process.” A glance at the man standing shadowed by the wall. Mouth curling. Words careless. “Throw him in the river.”

Smiling by the time he turns to Grace, fingers folding a stained pocket tissue into halves and then quarters. The paper blotchy with red. Slipped into a pocket and replaced with a cigarette, the sputter of a flame as he flicks a lighter.

The smell of the body lingering after it’s dragged out.

He cranes his gaze to Goneril. “So I heard you’ve been talking with our suppliers.” Nothing else, only the statement, the open end of it. He tilts his head to the side, exhales smoke. Silence coiling lazy to the ceiling. “Anything interesting?”

[faronvasiliev-blog]

@cassiankunhee arena di verona, evening. may 14th

Echoes of applause reverberate back from all the outer edges of the amphitheater, the cast set in miniature against the backdrop of stone and clapping visitors. Faron settles back against his seat. Waits with patience for the tourists to leave, the crowd to shuffle out. The sky penciled dark above him, all the stars snuffed out to make way for pervading cloud. Uncertain shape that could be the moon, hidden behind a shroud.

It’s quieter when he stands, redoes the laces of one shoe before setting on his way. Crickets and the low cut grass. Stutters of conversation overheard in English, the lilt of two Russian tourists he follows in the path of. It’s the long, loping stride of someone who is not a tourist that catches his eye.

Cassian. Repeated aloud when he says the man’s name, catches his attention with a hand raised in greeting. Not so unexpected after all.

“Dein Liebe zur Oper eilt Ihnen voraus.” He smiles. “Wieso wundert es mich nicht, Sie hier zu sehen."

“Was halten Sie von es, Tosca.”

[faronvasiliev-blog]

calina-s:

She closes her eyes for the first time the entire morning, for his mouth to her wrist or hand to her face means she needs no sight of him, is assured by touch alone. “I didn’t mean to wake you.” blinks and her eyelids droop, sluggish and heavy. “It’s too early.” Lifts his palm from her face to avoid the comfort, the lull to settle down. “Not for hours yet.” Six years and there’s no fix for the hypnosis of his voice in the dark. She lifts herself up, awkwardly fumbles to get uncomfortable, his hand caught in hers as she shifts back to the cold edge of the bed.  “I advise you to go back to sleep.” huffs a little laugh at her sleep deprived words, drawing their joined hands to settle against the mattress between them.  It does the trick, feet skimming the sheets beneath for warmth, a little energy in movement to wake her up again. Still she can’t seem to open her eyes for long, listens for the sound of his breathing to act as a sign to be alert once more, to watch him again. Her brow creases, “Are you sleeping?” whispered as she stalls her movements, lets the words carry in the near silence. The birds are awake on the roof, and she takes their rustling as a response, “If you don’t go to sleep we’ll be late.” She’s mumbling, whispering, but even in the misshapen words there’s an edge to her tone, a crinkle to her nose as she mentions it. Too many variables to account for, too much risk. 

“I’m sleeping,” he murmurs, a smile turned against the pillow. Eyes still open. Drinking in the sight of her before sight slips shut, he slips back into restful slumber. Tries to. Listens to the sound of her heart in the silence, the quiet motions, the rustling sheets. Hairsbreadth movement of her hand in his.

She’s a dream and he’s still foolishly awake.

His reply is to curl out his fingers, slide his hand again to her shoulder, her jaw. Sight dark, eyelashes against his vision, cheating because he can still see her without. The shape of her, bird bones and fragile, and it’s only his touch that makes her solid, the warmth of his palm on hers. And like that their roles are reversed. He becomes the changeling one, steeped in a dream.

“Иди спать, маленькая любовь.” Muffled by sleep; he skims his grip across her elbow, gently tugs her closer. Until he can fold her body to his. “Я разбужу тебя утром.”

[faronvasiliev-blog]

All this for you. If I possessed the world, you should have it also.

Daphné du Maurier, My Cousin Rachel (via antigonick)

[faronvasiliev-blog]

@bellamysantodomingo May 19th, 2017. Bellamy’s apartment, evening.

Fingertips running across a bookshelf. Catching on the smooth cover of a paperback. He pauses as his fingers slide to the top of the book, pull it out. Turns it over in his hand. He takes another step and moves on. Outside the window lies the chatter of Verona in the evening. In the room nothing but silence. The hum of an air conditioner. A line of sun where the blinds don’t wholly dim the light.

“This is a nice place.” A throwaway comment. And Faron stops by the wall, interest caught. Raises his free hand. Glides a thumb over a pinned photograph. “Quaint.”

There’s no reply. Not from the man by the window. Not from the other soldier half hidden in the shadows, stood by the doorway. But he hadn’t expected one. The two are hired muscle. Useful. Silent. And more trustworthy than the native Veronesi to be sure.

His attention refocuses to the book. After a moment of thought, he turns it to the first page.

He’s halfway past the introduction when there’s a sound at the doorway. Thumb resting on the page, above the inked 8 on the lower right. The sound of-- a key in the lock. A click. A faint smile, and Faron turns the page.