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clocking in for my shift at the tortured poets department rn. i’m unwell!

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modern suki wears these earrings at all times btw

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suki is that girl who makes so much money by simply going up to men and betting that she can pick them up off the ground

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" katara , i really hope you know that baiting me like that doesn't work . i'm not a guy . or toph . "

of all the ways suki had anticipated spending her day , hand-to-hand combat with katara certainly hadn't been on the list . she had accepted the challenge with an easy smile ; she quickly realized that it was less a friendly sparring and more of a challenge on katara's part . despite the thrill of it all , and despite knowing that there are no stakes in the fighting , she can't get past the feeling that something is off .

" is something wrong ? why are you so determined to fight me all of a sudden ? "

"You need to take it easy, okay? You got hurt pretty bad." ﹝@fanfought ﹞

Since arriving to Ember Island, Katara had been determined by one thing: beating Suki in a hand in hand combat. After a clean, quick defeat, she could enjoy some fun in the sun with her friends.

For days, Sokka rambled how the girl from Kyoshi Island taught him so moves. ( and mentioned getting beat by her without getting into the nitty gritty. ) She hovered water over her shoulder, applying minuscule pressure to tend to bruising and swelling. It took a lot to knock Katara down.

After a few more seconds of healing, she wiped the splash of water away, crashing and collecting onto the forest ground. ❝ Let me decide that… ❞ She rolled her shoulder then rotated her arm to stretch and prep before taking a defensive stance. ❝ …so let’s go again—or are you too chicken? ❞ Her taunt ended with a smirk.

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" well , you know me , if i can't angry mop , i'm gonna start throwing chairs and all that . " she rolls her eyes at his many quips , bringing the mop close to her body ever time he tries to reach for it . she watches the way he lifts a finger and gently traces it over her skin , then darts her gaze to his face , watching him closely , one eyebrow quirked as if to ask if that was truly what he wanted to do . naught but a breath of space between them , before the spell is broken and he begins to leave , armed with a typical quip . she laughs incredulously , raising the business end of the mop right up to his face , gripping the handle with both hands . " oh yeah , i see it . hold still , let me get that - "

@fanfought sent: "you're a terrible flirt, you know."

" I don't know what you're talking about. " boyish grin, he shrugs away the accusation . . . poorly. the look he gives her doesn't help either , like she was hope incarnate in this brutal torment. also doesn't help he's still in her space, attempting to seize the mop in her hand by stepping in her space so close they were only barely not-touching. "Sure you don't want me to take over . . ?" the hand closest to her raises it's finger to brush against her skin. He looks between them, smirks, and takes a step around her, "Have it your way. I keep forgetting how you like to angry mop." still deliberately within range, he points to the side with a cheeky grin. "Missed a spot."

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" oh . that's ... that's really nice of you . " if asked about the redness in her cheeks , suki would chalk it up to the heat on ember island . an easy scapegoat , considering she would likely look just as flustered in any other climate , but she simply refuses to think too hard about it . " no , no , it's okay . do you ... wanna sit with me ? "

yue's  eyes  smiled  with  her  towards  the  other  woman,  a  simply  short  nod  before  she  started  speaking.  ❛  yes,  i'm  fine  ...  i  was  actually  coming  to  check  on  you.  see  how  you  were  doing  ...  ❜  coming  up  with  an  excuse  as  for  wanting  to  be  in  the  warrior's  presence.  a  slight  redness  appearing  on  her  cheeks  as  her  mouth  moves, features feeling warm.  ❛  but  i  can  come  back  if  you're  busy.  ❜ 

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of all the things suki had anticipated in their travels ... this was not one of those things . they've assisted refugees , towns ravaged by the war , even wounded animals and children displaced from their parents . a farmer with squished cabbages strewn across the ground ... that was certainly a new one .

she snorts , unintentionally , and tilts back just enough behind qian to hide her face from the farmer's view . then she laughs just a little , an airy wheeze , quiet enough that only qian could hear it , and presses her gloved fist to her mouth to disguise it as a cough . tears are beginning to well unintentionally in her eyes , along with an ache in her gut from the sheer willpower of trying to suppress her laughter . with urgency , she twines her arm with qian's and begins to tug her back where they came from .

" oh spirits , i think i'm dying . i can't breathe . we have to leave before he asks us for help . or accuses us of murdering his cabbage patch children . "

the world is so, so big beyond their village. the earth kingdom sprawls out for an unimaginable distance around them in a way that's both intimidating and intoxicating. qian stands straighter these days. even with the encroaching presence of the war around them, she finds comfort in the embrace of the other warriors.

they're doing what they can. they hope it's enough.

on days like today, it doesn't feel like particularly enough, but there's something refreshing about being out in farmland. the sky above them is clear and vast. the crops beneath their feet . . . are destroyed.

qian laughs, an incredulous, rare sound. she lowers her voice when she speaks, if only to avoid the ire of the farmer eyeing them from a distance. " does he know that a few crushed yards of cabbages doesn't count as an emergency? "

@fanfought said : ❛ we can’t giggle, we’re at a crime scene! ❜

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sokka's determination is one of the first things suki noticed about him ; it's one of the reasons she fell for him , if she's being honest , amongst his loyalty , his bravery , his humour . not easy to give up when he is set on a task , and unwilling to give up until he has seen it through . sometimes it's to his own detriment , when it means he won't take care of himself . she seats herself in the empty space at his side with a troubled sigh , curving her arm delicately around him to rest a gentle hand between his shoulder blades , rubbing small circles in an attempt to soothe his nerves .

" forcing yourself to stay awake isn't good for you . you know that . and he wouldn't want you doing that for just one letter , no matter what it says . " she does not know hakoda that way sokka does , not even close , but knows in her heart that he is a kind man , and an even more loving father . suki reaches with her free hand to cup sokka's cheek , turning his face towards hers so she can look on his exhausted face properly . " how about this : you go to sleep , and i'll wait up for the letter . i'll wake you up as soon as it comes . deal ? "

                  ❝ you know i'd like nothing more... b-but i can't. ❞ he protested weakly, his voice trailing off in the northern winds. feeling the effects of sleep trying to sack him dead, he slaps his face harshly, the sharp sting momentarily snapping his eyes open through the fog of fatigue. he gulped down the rest of his tea, his foot thumping anxiously on the polar bear carpet as he waited for the second wave of caffeine to rush his system.

                  ❝ i'm expecting a messenger hawk from my ataata. he told me that on this exact day, i should receive an update on his... well. 'matters of affairs'. ❞ sokka lied, the corners of his mouth drooping slightly longer than his under-eye bags. in truth, he was worried about his dad's health. months ago, he heard stories about hakoda 'slowing down' and it haunted him ever since. his attempt to shield his concern with a lighthearted lie was thinly veiled, exposing the genuine apprehension ravaging his health.

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my day so far

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everybody's gangster until suki calls them 'pretty boy' or 'pretty girl' and then suddenly they're 🥺👉👈

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spirits , will she ever grow accustomed to the way he looks at her ? how intently he watches her , ty lee complains frequently about how suki never picked up on it herself . zuko watches her as though she is a mirage , a vision , a dream , fit to disappear should he so much as blink even once , should he dare to wake up . she may never be able to pinpoint exactly when those eyes of his started to make her feel lightheaded , when his smile ignited an inescapable warmth in her chest that burned from the inside out . when did she start to feel the urge to do this , to reach out and fix his robes for him , to brush his hair out of his lovely face , to stand close enough to see the crinkle at the corners of his eyes when he smiles at her ?

he looks so much younger behind closed doors . he always has to suki , ever since she first arrived in the fire nation and took her post as his head bodyguard . she is no stranger to the persona he keeps as fire lord , stiff spine and furrowed brow , all the properness befitting of a ruler , and finds herself constantly yearning for the man she knows is suffocating beneath the surface . this man , the one whose smile pierces between her ribs like a flame-tipped arrow , the one who has kissed her hand like she is something precious to him . and maybe , just maybe , she is precious .

his joke prompts a laugh , one that rings like windchimes on a gentle breeze . " oh no , is the court jester sick today ? i don't know how to juggle , but i think i can figure it out . " her nose is crinkled with mirth , softened by the warmth of his cheek against the back of her hand . she curls her free arm around zuko's waist to tug him even closer , close enough to pillow her cheek against his chest and face angled just enough to maintain the eye contact . he exposes his deepest aches and all the vulnerable parts of him , time and time again , and she makes a home for herself next to his battered heart . she tucks it close to her , shields it with her own body , bone and blood and flesh . she is no longer his bodyguard , but the urge to protect may never truly leave her . " you're making it really hard for me to wanna let you leave , funny guy . i might just have to hold you hostage in here . "

he can't tell if she's purposefully feigning ignorance or not— the way warriors sometimes do when it's better to pretend they know nothing, yet they're always the first ones to arrive, the last to leave. it's fitting, zuko thinks, this duality of hers : clad in blending makeup, the all-proper picture of guard with her hands kept dutifully behind her back one second, placed so neat and comfortable atop his furniture as if it belongs to her the next. he acknowledges her words with a meager hum because saying anything at all would betray the all-proper picture of fire lord he's trying so hard to fit into, but he stares at her when she rises from the settee, hawk-like in how he follows her fluid movements, and the careful line of his mouth means nothing. nothing at all. without trying to, she bends him, body accompanying her through practiced motions— first the robes, then zuko straightens his back for the sash, an end where his hands wait impatiently for her to be done, hovering at the curve of her waist ( and does she know, that all of his adoring citizens have nothing on her? the implications of sharing could mean something vast for zuko if it wasn't for the warmth of her fingers a breath away from touching his face ).

❝ sure. ❞ it's anti-climactic, how his tongue wants to say such intricate little things, lay before her an extensive collection of words capable of keeping the council hanging by the last thread of their patience would he ever recite it in front of them, only to settle for that. but the corners of his mouth turn up to form the littlest smile, this tender opening of the soul only for suki to witness. he takes her hand, brings it first toward his lips to press a light kiss on hardened knuckles, only to rest his cheek against the back of her palm, watchful eyes through a curtain of hair. ❝ only if you let me paint your face next? ❞ a joke, a brief moment of disconnect between the man who is supposed to lead a nation and the man who waits, all opened ribs and flesh, exposed.

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nostalgia

nostalgia : what makes them nostalgic, and why ?

scraped knees, twigs stuck in hair after roughhousing, the smell of fresh steamed buns, bumps and bruises and muscle aches after long days of training, mingxia's hugs, the snap of a metal fan opening, sea salt air, the chorus of young girls' voices in training, wisteria vines hanging off of the roof, sunrises from inside the village dojo, evening tea with the girls, smears of warrior paint on clothing, the splash of elephant koi in the water, long flights on appa, nights around the fire with the gaang.

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flower : what is suki's favorite flower , and why ? because of what it means in the language of flowers , or because she just likes how it looks / smells ?

she loves loves loves wisteria. her love for it stemmed from her mother; wisteria was chiyo's favourite flower as well, so much so that she cultivated it in their yard. suki's childhood home had wisteria vines crawling over the roof and hanging beautifully from the sides, and her mother tended to them religiously.

part of it is nostalgia, but she also enjoys the duality of the flower, how they look so beautiful on the outside but can be quite deadly if consumed. it was a lesson her mother taught her, a memory that exists very faintly on the edges of her memory: beauty does not negate your deadliness, do not let anyone think they can consume you without consequence. those who try will be burned.

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music and film

music : what kind of music do they like ? do they have any specific favorite artists / bands ?

her favourite genre is definitely indie/alternative, but she also enjoys pop and classic rock a lot. she also casually enjoys a lot of old early 2000's kpop (girls generation, brown-eyed girls, 2NE1.)

she definitely gravitates towards artists like mitski, noah kahan, gregory alan isakov, maggie rogers, phoebe bridgers, florence + the machine, laufey.

she also heavily gravitates towards wlw artists like renee rapp, fletcher, muna, girl in red, kehlani, hayley kiyoko, brandi carlile, boygenius, chappell roan, beabadoobee. and in addition, she really enjoys music from taylor swift, sabrina carpenter, halsey, lady gaga, in terms of top 40.

she has a very large classic rock playlist for when she's at the dojo, it is so big that you'd think a middle-aged man made it. bryan adams, guns n' roses, the who, CCR, aerosmith, black sabbath, led zeppelin, quite literally every classic rock hype song you can think of. the only other playlist she will train to is the playlist she has labeled "glitter gel pen songs".

film : what’s their favorite movies ( or in the case of muses that haven’t seen them, what WOULD be their favorite movies ? )

there is no universe where suki would not have been raised on the films of our lord and saviour michelle yeoh. crouching tiger, hidden dragon will always be her favourite movie, and the sword fight scene between jen and shu lien was absolutely suki's bi awakening. though suki has seen a lot of classic martial arts movies, michelle yeoh movies were quintessential to her upbringing and always her favourites. she does also have a soft spot for kill bill vol. 1 and 2, particularly because she had a crush on every woman in that movie.

she also really loves girlhood/womanhood movies like sisterhood of the traveling pants, ladybird, little women (all of the iterations), steel magnolias, fried green tomatoes, frances ha, and the farewell. these are her feel-good "i need to have a good cry" movies.

on the complete opposite of the spectrum, she LOVES horror movies. supernatural and science fiction horror are her favourite subgenres, she doesn't really enjoy slasher films much at all. favourites include but are not limited to alien, aliens, the exorcist, the vvitch, the conjuring, the blair witch project, nope, the thing, jennifer's body, and annihilation. kudos to anyone who can make it through a horror movie with suki, she gets so happy when someone watches them with her.

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MARIA ZHANG (400x640) ; crédit lionheart.

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I am both wound and knife

Maria Nephele: A Poem in Two Voices, Odysseus Elytis ( @feral-ballad ) |  Giuditta con la testa di Oloferne, Fede Galizia | Judith, August Riedel | Ideology, Aria Aber ( @cithaerons ) | Courage, Anxiety and Despair: Watching the Battle, James Sant | Vigil, Clementine von Radics

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I’m tired of you still tied to me

It’s just the way that you are

I’m tired of you, too tired to leave

I’m tired of you still tied to me