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“Kou…”

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11.22

いい夫婦の日 (Good Couple Day)

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Dude this is beautiful

eyeball

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In vol 13, at the end of chapter 52, Akutagawa says to Atsushi "...Hmph. Nothing special about that. I suppose he's far crueler than my own mentor."

If you don't mind, I'd like to know what is your take on its meaning

THANK YOU, I love this ask. I think that little line is so so meaningful, because it gives us additional insight on what Akutagawa and Dazai's relationship is like and on Akutagawa’s feelings towards Dazai. There’s so much nuance to it, because it makes Akutagawa aware. So often in fancontent Akutagawa is completely oblivious to Dazai's abuse, utterly blinded to Dazai's cruelness. But he's not!!! He's not!!! And it's suchhhh an eye-opener line about his character. Because, you know what? Akutagawa actually understands Dazai deeply. Way more than one would guess upon first impression. And the reason of that is because Akutagawa and Dazai are ultimately similar: they're both the “doing evil” to Atsushi and Chuuya's “doing good”¹.

Akutagawa comes close to understanding Dazai: I think during the time they spent together in the pm he got intimately acquainted with a side of Dazai no one else knows, for better or worse. I even think that since Dazai thought so lowly of Akutagawa, he didn't spare the same effort for putting masks on for him as much as he did with everyone else; as consequence, Akutagawa ended up seeing sides of Dazai that Dazai rarely revealed to other people. And I'm not talking exclusively about bad sides, but also vulnerable sides, fecets that overall he doesn't usually let emerge.

This mutual understanding - and isn't that a surprising sentence by its own! The understanding is mutual, doesn't go only in one direction, Akutagawa actually understands Dazai plenty – comes from a similarity between the two that, I've said many times before, is likely source to Dazai's otherwise unexplained cruelness towards Akutagawa. In Akutagawa's dark, bottomless, empty eyes, Dazai sees his own, and he utterly hates how Akutagawa embodies everything that's despicable in himself, the same emptiness, the same void. In the end, they both want to find a reason to live, while also being highly suicidal.

When I say “understands”; it's not about understanding what goes through Dazai's mind (that would be, for comparison, what Dostoyevsky gets closer to do); for Akutagawa it's a more instinctive understanding induced by their closeness, their similarity, their sharing the same sentiment of struggle in finding an explanation for the act of existing. The “can you give me a reason to live” from The Heartless Cur that counts for the both of them.

They're the same, and that's how Akutagawa can get Dazai, deeply. That line reveals exactly that! “Dazai is plenty cruel himself”. Akutagawa knows Dazai isn't a good man; but that's a separate thing from wanting his approval. It's not only this line; this understanding Dazai of Akutagawa is, I believe, reiterated consistently (if subtly) in the manga. It's in “You know [what mafia is like] better than anyone else” from chapter 4 and it's in “It'd take more than that to kill the man” from chapter 35 and it's in the way he talks about Dazai in chapter 51. It's in “There's no way you're dead. You are somewhere here in Yokohama. I just know it.” from the Entrance Exam light novel. When in Dead apple he says that Dazai joined the enemy, he's wrong; but if you ask me, that shows how Akutagawa understands the potential of the darkness within Dazai's soul better than Atsushi (but at the same time fails to see the possible goodness in him, because Port Mafia Dazai is what Akutagawa has ever known). I feel like all these moments are symptomatic of Akutagawa understanding Dazai on a level that's way deeper than others.

TL;DR: That line is so important to understand the depth of Dazai and Akutgawa's relationship because it shows how much Akutagawa gets Dazai, making of Akutagawa a much more cognizant character when it comes to Dazai than what one may think!

More on Akutagawa and Dazai's relationship: (1) (2) (3)

¹ Chuuya is the good half of the skk duo. It's just that whereas Atsushi does good in a more general sense, Chuuya's acting is mostly lead by willingness to do what's good for the Port Mafia. Still, both Atsushi and Chuuya act on way more altruistic basis than Akutagawa and Dazai do, am I wrong?

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Volume 42 cover 🥹

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This is part 2 of the Laser Pointer comic

No matter in what form, Marinette will find a way to catastrophize

Adrien is just vibing

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More of old work, it'll take a while before I get to my most recent comics andna

They are just silly

Part 1

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Reference from painting "The Fall" by Alan Stephens Foster

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2023 | 132 | picky eaters au #5

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he's like her pokemon

Also! I'm taking commissions, dm if interested

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Actually i forgot Suzaku doesnt know that Lulu didnt actually order Euphy to commit genocide so in his eyes actually yeah fully justified

I THOUGHT THEY WERE BEST FRIENDS SUZAKU HOW R U FLIPPING ON HIM SO FAST

EVEN LOSING NANALLY?! WHAT THE SUZAKU WTF

Damn i didnt realize how much i missed c2 until she was back to sassing him

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I THOUGHT THEY WERE BEST FRIENDS SUZAKU HOW R U FLIPPING ON HIM SO FAST

EVEN LOSING NANALLY?! WHAT THE SUZAKU WTF

Damn i didnt realize how much i missed c2 until she was back to sassing him

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Oh no…

Finished s1 of Code Geass

What the fuck was that

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Finished s1 of Code Geass

What the fuck was that

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Im 15 episodes into code geass

WHERE IS THE GAY?! I WAS PROMISED GAY!!!! (Its quite gay but im waiting for things to get to KuroFai level Gay)

also i love clamp for knowing exactly the kind of physical traits women like in a man

There isnt a single male character designed by clamp that isnt for the female gaze and i love that for us

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by destincelly

art republished with artist’s permission