fandomlobster

[fandomlobster]

"Soul mate" story where the first thing your soul mate says to you is tattooed on your hand (or their name, or whatever indicator you want, it doesn't matter) except the pairings don't indicate compatibility at all. People seem to just be like. Randomly paired up. Traditionalists insist that marriage is for tattoo-defined soul mates but for most people in the modern world meeting your tattoo buddy is like "oh hey, it's you! That's neat!"

The careers of multiple scientists are fuelled entirely by trying to figure out what the tattoos actually indicate.

[fandomlobster]

Hypothetical New Type Of Guy:

A guy who regards "virginity" in the same way European colonialism defines "untouched nature". Nobody else who has been here before is relevant enough to matter, other men might as well not exist. Every woman that he has not personally fucked is a virgin.

[fandomlobster]

Thinking about the Holmes story where a blind girl goes to him and is like "My fiancé is missing and he kept telling me the week leading up to his disappearance that he would always love me and come back for me,were anything to happen so I think he knew he was in trouble and I love him so much and I'm going to wait for him but I'd like to find him faster,ya know?" And Holmes figures out that it was this girl's parents to scam her out of money she was owed from an estate which she gave to them because she was still living at home,which she wouldn't be if she ever married,so her step father PRETENDED TO DATE HER for MONTHS to keep her from ever getting engaged to a real person and when Holmes finds out he confronts this man and this man is like "Well,you caught me! But it wasn't illegal:) so:)" and Holmes is like "No,but it was sickening and cruel and if she had a brother or good male friend he should post you up and whip you but she doesn't." And the man is like "No,she doesn't." And does the Victorian version of sticking his tongue out and Holmes is like "Well,I guess I'll do then!" And HE PULLS OUT HIS HUNTING WHIP.

[fandomlobster]

my grandma sent me a picture of my dog with his new xmas present and i need a fucking inhaler LOOK AT HIM

oh to feel a fraction of the unbridled joy he is experiencing

[fandomlobster]

Maybe if he was a little less fuckable we wouldn’t be in this mess

[fandomlobster]

THERE WAS A PRIDE PARADE TODAY???? TO CELEBRATE LGBTQ+ NEWLY WEDS WHO REGISTRRED THEIR MARRAIGES TODAY SINCE THE SAME SEX LAW WAS PASSED OH MY GOD

[fandomlobster]

this is a terrible time to be alive *remembers the latter half of the 14th century* this is a not so good time to be alive

[fandomlobster]

I walked upstairs to find both cats on the couch eating a bag of slowly thawing peas. Life is an adventure.

[fandomlobster]

[fandomlobster]

nothing will change your perspective on a character like someone who is batshit obsessed with them

[fandomlobster]

Former living weapon absolutely dominating at laser tag

[fandomlobster]

when she does anything to it at all

[fandomlobster]

i was kind of imagining all 15 pipes dropping at the same time in one cacophony but he drops them one after another very methodically and then sighs and goes At least i only dropped 14 of them.. & then there's. well you're smart you can figure this one out

[fandomlobster]

A timely cartoon. Originally for New Scientist.

[fandomlobster]

Uncaring

[fandomlobster]

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

[fandomlobster]