f-u-c-k-love

[f-u-c-k-love]

I missed you today

I laid where you once did with the same pillow and blanket and I wished you would stay

I missed the way you used to lay with me

The look you reserved just for my eyes to see

The way your tone changed when it was just us

My heart made such a fuss

And times we weren’t but you still gave me that little smirk

When the conversation was more than just work

I missed the way you held my hand and how your body fit with mine

I missed dancing in the kitchen and how your kisses felt so divine

Our sweet hugs when you’d leave

But I was so naive

To think you really wanted to be with me

The rose colored glasses made it impossible to see

Of course you wanted to be with her

My heart shattered and glass littered the earth

Silent tears into my pillow as I cried

Wishing you’d see how I felt inside

So I’ll continue to whisper, “I missed you today”

Until the time comes, you finally decide to stay.

[f-u-c-k-love]

I gave you every piece of me

To help you build your life

And you did, oh how you accepted everything

You built and built yourself higher and higher

Until I was nothing more than a pile of splinters

Left at the bottom of the mountain of your broken promises

And you were a mansion with a throne of gold

Forgetting what you left behind and who put you there.

[f-u-c-k-love]

Please make the nightmares go away.

- I can’t take it anymore

[f-u-c-k-love]

Seriously tired of giving people my all and it still not being enough. Can no one see that I am trying?

- I’m sorry I’m not a good enough friend for you

[f-u-c-k-love]

i’m not worth loving. don’t waste your time.

[f-u-c-k-love]

I’m nothing more than a fuckup.

-I’m sorry I can’t be enough for anyone

[f-u-c-k-love]

It’s just so fucking nice to know that I’m an inconvenience for everyone.

[f-u-c-k-love]

Love is bullshit.

[f-u-c-k-love]

You said you loved me and I told you that you didn’t, you loved the way I treated you. I gave you everything but I knew you would find someone better, everyone always does. I told you that. You told me that that would never happen and you weren’t like everyone else.

- you proved me right.

[f-u-c-k-love]

Why did you have to tell me you loved me? Why couldn’t you leave me the fuck alone? Why did you have to tear my heart out? Why did you do everything you said you wouldn’t?

[f-u-c-k-love]

I’m sorry that I was stupid enough to believe a fucking word you said.

- you said you weren’t like everyone else

[f-u-c-k-love]

Nobody wants me man, and as much as I try not to let it phase me...it’s killing me.

-I’m sorry

[f-u-c-k-love]

I may not be the most talented, prettiest, smartest, or have my life together, but I try my hardest and anyone who that isn’t good enough for, can go fuck themselves.

I’m good enough for me and that’s all that matters

[f-u-c-k-love]

Or any day for that matter

[f-u-c-k-love]

I just want one person to care about me. Is that too much to ask?

Don’t just let me leave

[f-u-c-k-love]

Well fuck I can’t make anyone stay, even my closest friends don’t want me. Maybe I should just leave.

[f-u-c-k-love]

They say that you only accept the kind of love you think you deserve, but even I wouldn’t wish this pain upon myself.

-why am I not good enough?