kyeong. 19. indonesia. university student, majoring in english. language and music enthusiast. aspiring writer. currently in love with aph nordics. filled with my works and rambles. studyblr. ask box: open!
It’s 2am rn and I’m just done translating. Sorry if the puns are shitty, I did try my best. The “Here’s Johnny” is actually a reference to a comedian in Japan not known elsewhere, so I changed it to fit the flow.
I translated the Fukurodani lottery ticket chapter!
The battle game Akaashi references towards the start is Pokemon! “Charm” and “Flatter” are translated from the Japanese Pokemon moves. Had to look those ones up haha.
Imagine the haikyuu characters as soccer moms in pta meetings
Everyone needs to run away now.
I feel like Yaku, Semi, and Suga would be the ones arguing the loudest about what they think the wellbeing of their children entails.
Oikawa, Kuroo, and Tendou would be about ready to fight the teachers over their kid’s grades.
Bokuto is harassing the teacher about his kid like is he doing good he’s doing good right? He says he’s getting good grades he’s your favorite student right?
Makki and Mattsun are the moms over in the corner gossiping to each other about everyone else in the room don’t even start me.
Ushijima keeps making weird plant metaphors about his kids and everyone is kinda used to it at this point but its a little weird dude.
Asahi just wants to pick up his kid’s report card and go home.
Konoha promised his spouse that he wouldn’t make a fuss this time, so he just makes quiet conversation with Komi and Sarukui.
Reon just wants to have a normal conversation with the teacher to ask how his kid is doing, but everyone else won’t shut up.
Washio was told to stay home after the last time he came and scared one of the kids. (Poor son)
Iwaizumi, Nobuyuki, Daichi just pretend that they don’t know anyone ever.
“I asked for Bokuto’s romantic advice because he has the most successful relationship of anyone I know, which, honestly, is still a mystery to me. Like, was it a hypnosis accident or something, where they put Akaashi under and made him fall in love with Bokuto and never said the magic word to snap him out of it? Like, if I say “nutmeg,” will he wake up and start screaming?”
HINATA’S LEG MUSCLES ARE HARD, BOTH HIS CALVES AND THIGHS. For this ball of sunshine to jump high enough to jump over Lev’s head, he must have some really impressive leg muscles.
Kageyama’s hair is really soft and so is Asahi. No one can convince me otherwise that everyone in the team ran their fingers through their hair at least once.
Tanaka has steady hands. Good for sewing because he needs to know how to because the last time he asked his sister to sew something for him ended in a disaster.
Daichi is A WALKING hEATER. Try hugging him on a particularly cold day and you’d rather die than let go.
Yamaguchi’s skin is really smooth (except his hands). aND HIS CHEEKS ARE SQUISHY. I WILL NAME HIM SQUISHY anD HE WILL BE MY SQUISHY.
TSUKKI IS REALLY TICKLISH. Not on a particular spot but it changes everytime, as if his body has a mood that it wants his tickle spot on his nape and it’s a total nightmare that Hinata and Noya always guesses right where his next tickle spot is haha.
Yachi is too huggable and IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL. Everyone really wants to hug this walking ray of sunshine but was to scared to scare her but Hinata was the only one who was able to hug her (it was spontaneous to, right after a particularly difficult match then he hugged her in excitement *whispers* kiss herrr)
NOYA IS REALLY FLEXIBLE. Holy crap then he scared the living daylights off of the team when he landed on a split after a jump toss attempt, (except for tanaka who was laughing his guts out yelling “NICE TOSS!”)
Despite his appearance, ENNOSHITA ALWAYS BEATS TANAKA IN ARM WRESTLING (like hanamaki and Iwa-chan). iDK why but PLEASE IMaGINE TANAKA YELLING IN FRUSTRATION ABOUT IT HAHAHA OMG
Suga’s voice is so comforting it can lull anyone to sleep. Don’t lie to me if you haven’t thought about this.
IWA-CHAN IS SURPRISINGLY PHOTOGENIC AND IT TICKS OIKAWA OFF BECAUSE IT TAKES HIM HUNDREDS OF SELFIE ATTEMPTS TO GET A GOOD PICTURE OF HIMSELF.
Lev isn’t particularly strong. He’s a beanpole and can’t carry anyone to save his life, save for kenma, who is a literal cat and weights like one too. I’m also pretty sure that yaku is way stronger than Lev.
Kuroo and Bokuto are proud of their biceps. CAN ANYONE IMAGINE THOSE NERDS TAKING PICTURE AFTER PICTURE OF THEMSELVES FLEXING WITH THEIR SLEEVES ROLLED UP. (and it won’t matter which camera, once, they even used kenma’s phone and changed his wallpaper to the picture of them flexing)
Akaashi is a light sleeper and it takes him almost an hour to fall asleep. He hates it when Bokuto and Kuroo are in the room because of all the noise they make SAVE HIM
Kenma is so used to pulling all nighters for his games that he doesn’t get eyebags from lack of sleep. I’m jealous… that’s about it
Ushiwaka’s spikes are so strong that the ball bounced from the other wall and back to him… right to his face. The whole court went silent save for Tendou’s laughter.
Up by 4 AM every day to do his hair and go on a jog
“An athlete can only be good as his diet lets him be!”
No, seriously, he eats almost enough food for the entire Miyagi prefecture every single morning and it’s the most disgusting thing anyone’s ever seen
Fuck him, he’s a morning person
Iwaizumi
Grumbles as he forces himself out of bed at 5 to go jogging with Oikawa with sheer willpower
Likes to spend his breakfast sipping coffee and reading whatever catches his interest
His favorite breakfast meal includes a bowl of rice, two fried eggs, and fish
Not a morning person, but 8:30 to him is the regular person’s 10:30 so it’s chill
Hanamaki
Is an absolute force of bitter death and destruction until he gets a cup of coffee into him
Once at the Seijoh Sleepover™, Oikawa hid Makki’s coffee grounds and was consequentially forced onto the ground in a strangle hold until they were given back to him
He can function as a human being and deal with people’s (Oikawa’s) shit much better after a cup of coffee as black as his soul
Favorite breakfast meal includes toast with sides of butter and jam, boiled eggs, and juice
Matsukawa
Wakes up almost-late every day
Laziest motherfucker on this planet #2
Would eat a piece of paper for breakfast and not care in the least
His tongue is as dead as Squidward’s hopes and dreams
Coffee doesn’t really affect him so he has to suffer through the drowsiness on his own, rip
Yahaba
Is the most adorable thing ever waking up
Makes tiny yawning and grumbling noises for the first 15-20 minutes of consciousness and is extremely embarrassed that everyone says its the cutest thing in the world
Has and will fight you for all the meat on the table during breakfast
@ the Seijoh Sleepover™, he stared at Matsun with such intensity that he handed over the last octopus sausage over without argument
Kyotani
Will punch you if you try to talk to him when he wakes up
Glares at people like they murdered his entire family
Yahaba’s cutesy act leaves him speechless and red in the face
Really fucking loves rice
Usually eats convenience store crap for breakfast so he get’s really excited when there’s actual rice and shit
Watari
“He’s probably a monster when he wakes up”
“There’s no way someone can be so happy all the time, after all”
Rises with a smile so bright it’s like Jesus blessed his teeth
Wakes up and greets the day with a warm “Good morning! Wow, I slept so great last night!”
#ActualChildofGoodness2k16
Will eat anything and everything and comment on how delicious it is, and then offer to do the dishes
Hanamaki once threatened to slap him for being too happy
Kindaichi
Goes to sleep at a responsible time
Wakes up blinking and lethargic for three minutes
Afterwards is completely normal
Loves greasy food in the morning
Kunimi
Laziest motherfucker on this planet #1
Didn’t go to sleep last night until 5 AM
Favorite breakfast items include poptarts, commercial cereal, extra sugary coffee, and a jar of melted salt caramel, i.e. enough sugar to kill a medium sized water buffalo
Is a literal zombie until he gets to school, falls asleep through his first three classes, and then starts functioning normally around lunch time
Bokuto is a youtuber and Akaashi is his camera man, they got famous because of this one video where they’re at a park and Bokuto gets chased by a goose but Akaashi puts the camera down to pet a cat and all you see it Bokuto screaming and flailing in the background while this cat rolls around all happy in the foreground. Most of their videos are similar to that.
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