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And what if the only place I’ve ever felt truly happy, has been in my mind?

And what if the cause of all my pain is my mind?

What if it’s all just in my head?

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The problem is, that somewhere along the way, while trying to please everyone, and be who they wanted me to be, I forgot who I actually am.

And I’m scared, cause I don’t know how to find her again.

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“I am a day dreamer and a night thinker.”

— Unknown

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I’m sorry I’m failing my classes, it’s just all my energy is going towards trying to stay alive✨

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I don’t think I have ever felt what it’s like to belong

Belong somewhere, someone, to something, anything

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Does it ever get easy? Knowing you are no one first choice? Having friends ask you to do something only after everyone else tells them no? Knowing there is not a single person in the world who would wake up every day and choose you, be your person?

Knowing that even you yourself wouldn’t have chosen you…

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this blog may contain sensitive content (its me im sensitive)

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— Rudy Francisco

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Going back, reading my old posts and realizing I never got better, I don’t heal, and all the broken pieces of me are still broken

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Stop checking,

No one is coming

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“Until you get comfortable with being alone, you’ll never know if you are choosing someone out of love or loneliness.”

— Mandy Hale

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“Kill the part of you that believes it can’t survive without someone else.”

— Sade Andria Zabala, War Songs

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Coming back home

And it doesn’t feel like home anymore. Everything has changed

No everything is the same. It’s me who is different

And all my life is here and I have nothing here

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Hope one day someone will show me that I’m not difficult to love