emmarachelharding

[emmarachelharding]

Friday 3rd February

The day before we fly to Paris! It's come so fast and I still haven't packed 😂 I'm excited now though and I'm sure I'll get everything sorted out before.

We are staying in Paris for 5 days and then we will take a train to Bruges for 5 more days.

I've got a little bit of a cold so I'm hoping it doesn't get much worse, don't want it spoiling the trip.

This week Vlad gas been working like crazy trying to get everything done before we go. We also took bubs to his swim class and English group. I think he's enjoying being around other babies of his age and the English teacher is very good.

I hope it continues and there is enough interest as we had to stop his Russian speaking group when there weren't enough babies his age attending.

They did some music and games, played with different large and small objects and also some arts/crafts. Tbh he's usually watching most of what happens and trying to climb the stairs 🤣 but he seems happy!

Met up with Sophie and her baby yesterday which was nice. She gave me some booties for bubs as I think it will be quite cold and I didn't have any. I bought him a snowsuit for insulation but the feet are cutout so the booties will be super helpful.

Would have liked to have met up with a few other mums but the weather has been bad, stormy and rainy and without a car I didn't fancy heading out. Hopefully will be able to drive husband's car in May when I get insured.

Will have plenty of people to catch up with when I'm back. 😁

[emmarachelharding]

Wednesday 1st February

Can't believe January of the new year has come and gone so quickly! The year is already flying by.

Just to bring you up to speed with the last month or so...we went to the UK for Christmas and spent time with family and friends. It was honestly just what I needed, a reset and recharge. Especially considering that I didn't think I'd be able to go.

I think bubs enjoyed his time there too and was interested in playing with the cat and trying to bring down the Christmas tree 🤣

Otherwise we ate well and relaxed and was so lovely for family to spend time together. The husband was a little unwell but then so many got sick over the winter months and luckily it wasn't anything serious.

We came back to Israel just after the new year and since then have just been getting back into a routine, meeting friends and Vlad has been trying to catch up with his work. We have our first interview with the immigration office scheduled for 20th February and before that we are off on our honeymoon finally this Saturday for two weeks.

We are going to Paris and then Bruges 😁

[emmarachelharding]

Tuesday January 31st

Been a while since I posted last. Had a very busy end of 2022 with baby's first birthday and then we travelled back to the UK for Christmas.

The birthday party was a success in the end...it was more stressful than I had anticipated, organising the decorations, food, cake etc. Also hosting people at your house is full on! At least that's how it felt for me, it was a whirlwind 😂 I'm not sure I ate more than a few bites, trying to make sure that everyone was being taken care of.

It's funny as bubs won't even remember but for the photos, anyhow I think everyone had a great time and I was pleased that more people came than I expected as many of the guests were relatively new friends. I'll have to start thinking now what we do for next year 🤣

Then at the last moment, literally the week we were meant to travel to the UK, we decided to head to MH (immigration office) as we still had no update on the status of our visa application and we knew that we wouldn't be able to leave Israel without permission, otherwise it would be a problem when I tried to return.

I wasn't very optimistic about our chances, it was 50/50 depending on who we saw, but luckily the lady who attended us was very nice, made no trouble at all, she was familiar without case and told us we should receive a date for our first interview very soon. Needless to say she granted us the necessary permit that would allow us to travel one time abroad.

We were ecstatic and could finally get excited about the trip and arrange seeing family and friends.

[emmarachelharding]

Tuesday 6th December

It's getting fresher here now. You really notice the temperature drop at nights. Considering it's winter it's still quite mild, around 14 in the morning getting up to 18 in the middle of the day.

Bubs has been fighting a small cold but seems to be on the mend now. The real annoyance for him atm is his teeth. He is dribbling something chronic, absolutely saturating his clothes to the point where I've had to put a bib on him! One has burst through already which is the worst part, now just waiting for the other one which is just under the skin. Then he'll have eight teeth already!

It's also getting close to his 1st birthday! Just a couple of weeks to go now. Very exciting but frantically trying to organise his party here which is a challenge. The food is the part that's hardest for me as it all has to be kosher for our guests. My husband is helping with this aspect and I'll be in charge of the decorations mainly. I think that to avoid any issues we are serving a fully vegetarian buffet as there will be plenty of dairy products on offer. I suppose people could bring their own food if they felt more peace of mind but I'm not sure that there will be any particularly religious guests, although my husband has pointed out to me that many secular Jews also keep kosher.

We have also been to swim class and baby group as usual. I can't be sure but I think bubs is enjoying it more and more each week...this might be as he feels more familiar with the routine of his days now and recognises familiar faces. He's definitely more confident in the water and doesn't mind getting his head wet anymore! I'm so glad about this as I want him to enjoy swimming like I do

Tomorrow we have more vaccines for him and we will go and get party supplies too. Also hope to meet up with Sophie and her bubba and maybe another new friend Jane on Friday.

[emmarachelharding]

Sunday 4th December

It's been a while since last post as things have been busy. Mum came to visit around the middle of November for a week. I was excited and a little nervous, hoping that all would go well and I think that is was overall a success.

We all had a lovely week and baby enjoyed seeing his grandma and vice versa. We did some wonderful sightseeing and ate out at some great restaurants. Hopefully she will come back again in March and next time stay for 2 weeks.

Otherwise we have been sticking to more of a routine, going to swim class every Monday eve and baby group one morning a week. Our bub is the youngest there atm, but I think he's really enjoying it and it's good to get out of the house. We are also trying to go for walks every afternoon as it's good exercise and helps to break up the day.

Also met up with some of the English speaking mums. This time we met just up the road so I could walk there and back again. Was another fun eve and great to see some new faces and share experiences.

The weather here is getting colder, it's still not so cold, around 21 in the day but the nights are chilly now. We have all been a little bit ill and I'm putting it down to the change in climate. I'm beginning to feel better now but bubs has a bad cough so I'm keeping an eye on him.

We also went shopping with my mother in law to get me a winter coat as a belated birthday gift. Was able to find a very cosy and waterproof one in Zara which looks like it'll last me a long while. It's quite difficult to find winter coats that are waterproof, well insulated and with a hood, which also look half decent! Not to mention the fact that as I'm tall, I already struggle enough to get coats that are long enough in the arms and torso. Anyhow thankfully it was a success. Also got bubba a snowsuit and some more winter outfits and sleep suits as he will need for these colder months plus for when we travel to Europe during this time.

That's all to catch up on for now.

[emmarachelharding]

Sunday 13th November

It's been a busy week again, it never seems to be calm ha! We have been organizing the flat in preparation for my mum's visit this coming Wednesday so we needed to clean stuff and wash and get her bed cleaned and ready. We also went out during the week to check bus routes so that I know how to get to some places as there will be a few days when it's just mum me and the baby.

I'm really hoping the weather will be fine and dry as for now it's forecasting rain! I'm sure it will change though as the forecasting here is very unreliable, it must for some reason be harder to predict what will happen in the atmosphere.

We saw my partner's mum and grandpa on Friday afternoon, they will come every Friday afternoon now as it works out well with my husband's work schedule. He will pick them up on his way back from work. This week they helped to disassemble the old cot that was in the flat when we arrived and we were finally able to put together the cot that was gifted by a family friend. It was a bit stressful and there were some tense moments between my husband and his mother in law but luckily it was completed successfully.

The transition seems to have been ok for my baby but he did wake up and cry at 230 in the morning the first night which is highly unusual for him. I hope it's just where he needs to get used to the new cot and that it will pass quickly as he has been sleeping really well now for almost 2 months.

On Saturday we were out for the birthday of one of my husband's friend's wives. We went out for a meal at a restaurant in downtown Haifa, Douzan. It was pretty and the atmosphere was nice but it was really expensive and the food was just average. To give you an idea my husband had steak which coat around £37 and I had sea bream which was around £30. These are prices I would expect to pay in London but not here! A bit disappointing.

Today we met up with the lady who invited us to her Halloween party at her house. It was just us and our bubbas. Her baby was born around 3 months after mine so they are quite interested in each other. We went for coffee and walked around one of the big shopping centres in Haifa. So lovely to see her again and chat, she seems really down to earth and kind.

It was also the first time I took the bus alone with a pushchair. I was honestly quite nervous, mostly as I knew I'd need help getting on and off the bus and I can't speak Hebrew. This turned out fine, people are usually happy to help and most people here speak or at least understand English. Also there is a very hand app Moovit which has info in English too and tells you which number bus routes to take and provides you with guided instructions on which stops to go to and get off at. One of the other English speaking girls I met recommended it to me thankfully!

[emmarachelharding]

Tuesday 8th November

It's getting colder here now. I usually feel the cold easily but even my husband is going to bed with jogging bottoms and jumpers too! We also just had a very heavy downpour. It's rained once or twice since I've been in mid August but this was the most significant rainfall. I didn't think to shut the windows as was busy chasing around my baby and then later discovered the rain had soaked through the furnishings close to the windows...oops! I've learned for next time anyhow. It was incredible to see the water pouring down the steps outside, it came down so fast and heavy but now it's bright and sunny again.

My baby has been a little congested recently so we had to miss swim class on Monday. I'm hoping that he will feel better soon but also that he doesn't get so afraid when we take him to the pool like he did last week. It's a shame that he had to miss the class this week as it would have been good to gradually build up his contact with the water again.

We will also be taking him to the other baby group on Thursday this week due to my husband's work schedule. He seemed to really enjoy this last week and had fun meeting other babies. I have tried to find an English-speaking group but I don't think we will be able to take him to the only one that seems available as it's not possible to get there by public transport and it's on a day that my husband is working. So very hard to find decent baby classes here but I'm keeping a lookout.

We also took baby to have a doctor checkup and all seems well. We will have to take him back in a month to have more vaccines including the oral polio syrup which they prescribed due to the outbreak in Israel. It's strange that they don't give meningitis c here and meningitis b can only be prescribed by your doctor rather than getting it from Tipat Halav (baby clinic) where all the other vaccines are given. I have no idea why.

Met up again with my expat friend here who has also recently had a baby and she was telling me how she is putting off giving her baby vaccines until he is older. I respect her decision absolutely. I suppose I've never really questioned or given the immunisation program for babies a second thought. I just accepted that it was what you do but it's interesting to consider that maybe I should be thinking more carefully about the decisions I make for my baby. I'm going to have a lot more big choices to make for him and it's important that I get it right and do what's in his best interest.

[emmarachelharding]

Tuesday 8th November

It's getting colder here now. I usually feel the cold easily but even my husband is going to bed with jogging bottoms and jumpers too! We also just had a very heavy downpour. It's rained once or twice since I've been in mid August but this was the most significant rainfall. I didn't think to shut the windows as was busy chasing around my baby and then later discovered the rain had soaked through the furnishings close to the windows...oops! I've learned for next time anyhow. It was incredible to see the water pouring down the steps outside, it came down so fast and heavy but now it's bright and sunny again.

My baby has been a little congested recently so we had to miss swim class on Monday. I'm hoping that he will feel better soon but also that he doesn't get so afraid when we take him to the pool like he did last week. It's a shame that he had to miss the class this week as it would have been good to gradually build up his contact with the water again.

We will also be taking him to the other baby group on Thursday this week due to my husband's work schedule. He seemed to really enjoy this last week and had fun meeting other babies. I have tried to find an English-speaking group but I don't think we will be able to take him to the only one that seems available as it's not possible to get there by public transport and it's on a day that my husband is working. So very hard to find decent baby classes here but I'm keeping a lookout.

We also took baby to have a doctor checkup and all seems well. We will have to take him back in a month to have more vaccines including the oral polio syrup which they prescribed due to the outbreak in Israel. It's strange that they don't give meningitis c here and meningitis b can only be prescribed by your doctor rather than getting it from Tipat Halav (baby clinic) where all the other vaccines are given. I have no idea why.

Met up again with my expat friend here who has also recently had a baby and she was telling me how she is putting off giving her baby vaccines until he is older. I respect her decision absolutely. I suppose I've never really questioned or given the immunisation program for babies a second thought. I just accepted that it was what you do but it's interesting to consider that maybe I should be thinking more carefully about the decisions I make for my baby. I'm going to have a lot more big choices to make for him and it's important that I get it right and do what's in his best interest.

[emmarachelharding]

Friday 4th November

It's been a busy week and I've been a bit under the weather. I often get colds when I'm run down and stressed so I've been trying to take it easy which is easier said than done with an active 10 month old!

On Monday we took our baby to swim class after 4 months of no time in the pool. It wasn't too bad, there were times when we could tell he enjoyed it, but he was definitely more suspicious of the water than before and he was a little on edge. Hopefully he'll get used to it the more sessions we attend.

We also went to another baby class on Tuesday morning which was focused on baby sensory and socialisation. This was more of a hit, we could tell he really enjoyed the class and had fun doing the activities with the other babies. My partner and l are going together though as the classes are all in Russian and I can't speak it. There's a large Russian-speaking community here so obviously there is a demand for this type of thing, it's just unfortunate that there isn't anything like this in English. But my partner and I are lucky enough that we can take our baby to these classes together.

After this we were invited to a Halloween party by one of the mums I met at the English speaking evening out. She actually put me in touch with another lady who has a 7 month old baby and so she kindly invited us to her apartment for this party although we'd never met before. There were quite a few other English speaking mums and it was again a great opportunity for us to meet new people and our baby seemed to enjoy being around other little people.

Yesterday was my husband's mum's birthday so we went for lunch at a local restaurant to celebrate. All went well and apart from a little trouble finding a spot to park, the afternoon was lovely and it was great to spend time together with family.

[emmarachelharding]

Sunday 30th October

My baby has his Israeli passport! He now has official documentation to prove his Israeli citizenship. Here in Israel every citizen gets a national id number at birth which he was already given after we proved he was my husband's son.

Yes that's right we had to prove that he was our son! Due to the fact that I'm not Jewish and in Judaism only the mother passes down religion to her children, even if my baby was born here in Israel he or she would not automatically get citizenship. This also despite the fact that my husband is Jewish and Israeli. The process is complicated and involved and requires a number of bureaucratic steps.

In our case we had to submit an application to the immigration office in Israel who then stipulated that our case be referred to the Israeli court. Although we had our baby's birth certificate from the UK which listed both my details and my husband's details we were required to take DNA tests to prove that our son is genetically ours. All three of us were required to produce samples which was a stressful experience honestly as trying to get blood from a baby is not easy! Not to mention this all took months to complete.

Once the DNA samples came back positive then we had to return to the immigration office to complete the process and register our son. Then we were able to finally apply for his passport and he got his id number. He will never be Jewish unless he chooses to convert when he is older.

If we have more children even though we are now living here in Israel I believe that the process is the same until you are able to prove that you have been living together for over 6 months. Anyhow l know that we will still have to apply for citizenship and that it won't be granted automatically due to me not being Jewish. I suppose it's quite eye-opening the way the system works here, or at least for me with my naivety. Perhaps just one example of the inevitable difficulties and frustrations of being a mixed-religious couple in a predominantly Jewish state.

Anyway a happy outcome as our son now has both his British and Israeli citizenships! And extra happy being that it took us 10 months to achieve!

[emmarachelharding]

Thursday 27th October

Met up with some other English-speaking mums the other night. They call themselves Anglo- mums here. It was actually a really great time. I was quite nervous, felt way out of my comfort zone meeting a group of women for the first time. It's hard, at least for me, to try and make new friends as an adult. I always feel super self-conscious and awkward. But within a few minutes I felt at ease and we were laughing and joking about being mums and balancing family life.

I will definitely look forward to meeting up with them again. They get together usually once a month, although I don't think I'll be able to do it next time as my mum will be visiting. But it was great to chat with other like-minded people and to know that I'm not alone.

Also hope to meet up with the one of the girl's friends who has a baby a similar age to my baby next week as would be great to help him make some new friends. Also that way maybe I can find out other baby related info which would be really useful.

Anyhow all in all I'd call it a success and I'm looking forward to meeting up with them again. They all have such fascinating stories and interesting diverse lives. Makes me feel quite boring and plain honestly, which maybe I am!

[emmarachelharding]

Tuesday 25th October

Today I saw my first Israeli rain! I've been here since the middle of August and today is the first time it's actually rained!

It was so dramatic. The sky came over all dark and cloudy and then I heard great rumbles of thunder. The rain began gently at first building gradually to a crescendo while the thunder clapped intermittently. It got cooler too as the wind whipped through the apartment. It was heavy and brief, it can't have lasted more than 30 minutes. Apparently November is the time the rains start so I guess I can look forward to more of it to come.

I was meant to be meeting a friend today but as I didn't fancy a walk out in the storm we've rescheduled for this Thursday. I will however be going out this evening for one of my first social gatherings since I arrived here. I will be meeting with some ladies who I found on a Facebook group. They are all mums who live in the city where I'm based in Israel. Some of them have older children and others babies.

I'm looking forward to it as honestly I've found it quite difficult to make friends here so far. As I'm not working I'm at home most days with my baby. This means that I'm a bit restricted with what I can do, where I can go etc. I've joined a fair few Facebook groups and been actively searching for baby groups or classes to take him to so that we can both socialise.

What I've found so far though is that there aren't many options and less still if you don't happen to speak Hebrew. Speaking to others I've gathered that there isn't really a culture of mum/baby groups here, most mums are back at work by the time baby is 3 months old and baby is stuck straight into a nursery or gan as it's called here.

Anyhow I'll let you know how it goes and let's keep fingers crossed I'll find some friends soon.

[emmarachelharding]

But how did you end up in Israel?!

I would say my friends that life is a crazy ride and you never know where it's gonna take you! If you'd have said to me 5 no wait, even 3 years ago that I'd be living in Israel in 2022 I'd have said you were mad!

Just 3 years ago back in 2019 I was married to an Argentinian and living over there. I could never have envisioned that I'd be on another continent, in another foreign country and with a brand new family. But life is strange and works in mysterious ways.

There's a lot to unpack here and I feel like I could write a book about the events that have led me up to this point but hopefully with some more posts, slowly we'll get there and all will be revealed.

Essentially I met my now wonderful and beautiful husband through my job and he happened to be Israeli. This was back in August 2019 which as fate would have it, coincided with the breakdown of my first marriage (we separated at the start of that month and I flew back to the UK on the 12th). Fast forward 3 years and we are living together with our 10 month old son in Israel.

I think it's even more surprising to me as I swore I'd never leave the UK for a man again after my unsuccessful first marriage in Argentina. I certainly wasn't looking for love at the point when I met my current husband, and definitely wasn't looking for another foreign partner. I can still remember after I shared that I was in a serious relationship with an Israeli with my mum, her reaction was something along the lines of 'Why can't you pick a British man? Why does he have to be foreign? What's wrong with British men?!' But life can surprise you in the best ways if you are open and willing to take a chance and luckily I followed my heart.

By no means am I saying that it was easy and the journey just to get to this point hasn't all been plain sailing. It has been a struggle full of setbacks and we are still going through it. But if deep down you have a gut feeling or instinct, call it what you will, that you are on the right path, don't ignore it. Trust yourself and love yourself enough to respect your dreams.

This is what we did and after welcoming our son at the end of 2021 we got married earlier this year. Due to financial circumstances we realised that it would be better if my husband continued working in Israel and so despite my initial reluctance to up and leave the UK again, I have done so knowing that this is the right decision for our family.

So that's the short version of how I've ended up in Israel.

[emmarachelharding]

Sunday 23rd October

Maybe it's because I've just had another birthday or perhaps I'm feeling especially motivated today but I'm starting a blog. Who was it that said better to try and fail than never to try at all?

Well anyway here we are. And what will this blog be about? My life and experiences living as a foreigner and particularly as a non-Jewish woman in Israel.

What do I hope to gain from this blog?

1) Clarity and perspective about the context of my situation - by that I mean that I find it useful to write about stuff that happens to make more sense of it

2) A way to remember and relive my time and experiences in Israel

3) Enjoyment - this is time for me to do something I love

4) Creation and manifestation of thoughts and ideas

5) Community - hopefully others will relate and connect with my situation and if not, at least I hope it will be interesting