emilx311

[emilx311]

imagine having a personality so morally bankrupt that the pope himself said "i'm telling god" and headed out

[emilx311]

The death of a conspicuously humble and compassionate pope at dawn of Easter Monday, after completing his Holy Week duties (prioritizing prisoners and children) and -- one can only presume -- rebuking a member of the church who has been making himself loathed and infamous by violating or ignoring the teachings of the gospels...

It's not the first time in the last few years that I've thought "medieval chroniclers would be going wild over this," but medieval chroniclers would really be going wild over this.

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“We dropped different numbers of balls at different rates, different heights. We had a ramp. The ramps were at different angles, trying to get the most out of the balls as they hit the actors. After doing the tests, we figured out 35 feet above the deck of the ship was the height we needed our nets. We had these three big nets that held almost 80,000 per net. The balls dropped 35 feet into ramps that projected them towards the stunt guys. It just knocked them over. It was pretty spectacular.”

-Mark Hawker, SFX Coordinator for Pirates of the Caribbean

“It’s amazing to see a bunch of 40 and 50-year-olds turn into three-year-olds all of a sudden. Everybody had to pick up blue balls, hit the other guy in the head. It was like, ’Is it time for the parents to come pick up the kids?’”

-George Marshall Ruge, Stunt Coordinator for Pirates of the Caribbean

[emilx311]

Actually, I know damn well Darcy never sat down and thought about marrying Lizzie. If he had, it would have been a week before he was rounding up Bingley, sitting him down, and looking him in the eye like he was about to propose high treason and going, "Jane. You still down bad for her?"

Coin toss whether Bingley would actually get to answer before Darcy turned around and flipped over a whiteboard like

and launched right into the most detailed migration pattern known to Regency England to keep the extraneous Bennets as contained as humanly possible by rotating them between various Bingley/Darcy estates. Like, we're talking about trading them off for minor holidays a decade out kind of detailed.

"If you and Jane take them for Lady Day ten years hence, Elizabeth and I will take them for Michaelmas. We'll all be together for Christmas and Midsummer, so we'll divide the responsibility individually on those days."

This would be followed by thirteen different spreadsheets projecting joint expenditures so Bingley knows what sort of financial commitment he'll be shouldering and how to minimize it, what proportion Darcy will take care of, what the estate plans are in case Darcy predeceases anybody, when they should probably roll out various stages to keep it from affecting their respective sisters' ability to maximize their own husband-hunting--whole nine yards.

Darcy does not know that he'll probably be murdered when the Bingley sisters find out why he asked for their social calendars. He'd be marginally fine with that at this point, because the fucking Napoleonic War campaigns were not as meticulously planned as his roadmap to getting the other three Bennets satisfactorily married, and Darcy feels about as able as if he'd spent the last year on Elba.

It takes Bingley a few minutes to realize why this is happening, then he's like

"You proposed to Elizabeth?! Congratulations!"

Darcy... knew there was something he was forgetting.

That man would have kicked the Collins's door open with four binders tucked under each arm, dumped them in a pile in front of Elizabeth, and loudly announced that if they get married tomorrow he can have her entire family except for Jane extraordinary renditioned to the Scottish moors by Sunday and then been like

"Why are you yelling at me?! I promise you, it will work! You'll never see anyone in your family except for Jane again, I swear it!" when she starts yelling at him.

[emilx311]

This is why I read the reddit comments

[emilx311]

I was re-watching the little mermaid and it got me thinking: it would have been so cool to be a guest to eric's weddings tbh

this guy's been raving about this mystery girl he says saved him and left him on the beach but nobody believes him, then he found a different girl in the same beach, proceeded to date her for a couple of days in front of the whole town, but then turns up with a different one (allegedly the first one) and decides he's marrying her on the spot

and you're like, sure, I need to see this mess

so you go to the wedding and it's WILD: there's some sort of animal riot, every creature is attacking the bride (including the prince's dog), town date redhead is being carried into the wedding ship in a barrel by a small fish, you're like 'I need to see how this turns out' and then mystery redhead, who was supposedly unable to talk, starts singing???? and talking??? and they're about to kiss???? but then the bride turns into sexy cthulhu???? and the redhead grows a fish tail???? and sexy cthulhu bride drags redhead into the water??????

you are taken ashore while the groom goes to fetch one of the brides, unsure which but all signs point to the redhead that was carried in the barrel, and then there's a storm, and sexy cthulhu becomes gigantic and is wearing a crown and you're like 'work, bitch' while eating snacks and then it's all over and sexy cthulhu disappears

but then there's another wedding announced and you're like 'I'm sure it can't top the first one' but you attend and TRITON shows up too????? myth and legend lord of the sea king triton from the stories????? with a white beard and an 8 pack and the same crown sexy cthulhu was wearing??? turns out he's the FATHER OF THE BRIDE??????? and there are mermaids everywhere, all around the ship, kind of unnerving tbh really really scary situation, but it's fine because triton is making rainbows in the sky and hugging the bride and manipulating water and you're also pretty sure the chef just got decimated by a crab?????

royal weddings should all be like these tbh this prince sure knows how to throw them like nobody else in the disney pantheon

[emilx311]

STOP no more live-action remakes. We're going the other way now. Animated Casablanca. Animated The Godfather. Animated Oppenheimer. Animated Fight Club.

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but what if i read one of your fanfics and then went to your ao3 accounts and read all of your fanfics and left a comment on every single chapter of every single one and you got spam emails from all of my kudos and comments and it made you smile, what then? what if i brighten your day with my words like you did mine, what then???

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Made for amazing @luciaelena ❤️ as a tiny thank you gift for her PayPal donation.

Thank you sooooo much for your unwavering support and kindness. I am so grateful for everything you are doing for me and my family. It's a huge help.❤️🫂 Hope you like the pic))

[emilx311]

what if vampires are like mosquitoes and only the ladies drink blood

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MLK QUOTES WHITE PEOPLE DONT QUOTE

Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.- Martin Luther King, Jr.

He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Discrimination is a hellhound that gnaws at Negroes in every waking moment of their lives to remind them that the lie of their inferiority is accepted as truth in the society dominating them. Martin Luther King, Jr.

A riot is the language of the unheard. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Property is intended to serve life, and no matter how much we surround it with rights and respect, it has no personal being. It is part of the earth man walks on. It is not man. Martin Luther King, Jr.