eddiediaz-week

[eddiediaz-week]

(You Are) Safe With Me

Chapters: 1/7 Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Eddie Diaz & Bobby Nash; Eddie Diaz & Captain Mehta (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Evan "Buck Buckley; Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Bobby Nash; Captain Mehta (9-1-1 TV) Additional Tags: Amnesia; Temporary Amnesia; Medical Inaccuracies; Unreliable Narrator; Post-Episode: s05e13 Fear-O-Phobia (9-1-1 TV); Evan "Buck" Buckley Takes Care of Eddie Diaz; Eddie Diaz Has Panic Attacks (9-1-1 TV); Amnesiac Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Pining Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Comforting Evan "Buck" Buckley; Supportive Evan "Buck" Buckley; Worried Evan "Buck" Buckley; Swearing; Eddie Diaz Is Not Okay (9-1-1 TV); Implied/Referenced Self-Harm; Implied/Referenced Suicide; Minor Evan "Buck" Buckley/Taylor Kelly; Evan "Buck" Buckley/Taylor Kelly Break Up; Endgame Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz; Eddie Diaz Week 2024 (9-1-1 TV); Angst with a Happy Ending Summary: Eddie takes a deep breath — as deep as he can before his chest flares with more pain — and asks, “How—how do you know Chris?” Eddie thinks it’s a fairly straightforward question, but Buck looks like he’s been punched. Eddie doesn’t understand it, but— Seeing that look on Buck’s face, it— Eddie opens his mouth, desperate to come up with something to say, something that would wipe it away, but Yet again, he shuts his mouth with a click. Why is he reacting like this? “What?” Buck asks, voice breaking. Eddie’s shame returns, this time deeply intertwined with guilt. “What— Eddie, what do you mean? Eddie—” Buck exhales shakily. “Did you— did you hit your head?” What? (Or, when Christopher calls Buck, worried about his dad, Buck rushes to the Diaz house to check up on Eddie. Eddie, however, seems to think it's the night of his second shift at the 118 — four years ago.)

I'm extremely late with this one. This was my first idea for @eddiediaz-week way back in September, but I just didn't have the time to edit it properly, so I held back on it until I got to edit it, and now here it is (the first chapter, anyway). This was written for the Day 1 prompt Sick Eddie/Taken Care Of.

[eddiediaz-week]

I guess your mama didn't know the gift she got when she got you

Buddie | chapter 1/? | 1,911 words ✨ please read the tags

Written for @eddiediaz-week - Thursday prompt 'fake dating'. I had an idea and was like, yeah I can write a ficlet for this. 4k later (and counting) ...

Tired of his mom's nagging, Eddie tells a lie that spirals wildly out of control. - "He has someone else he can go to," Eddie said automatically, Buck's smiling face flashing into his mind. "Your friend Buck doesn't count," she said dismissively, and Eddie felt his hackles rising defensively. "I'm talking about a partner, Eddie. Someone who will commit to being with you and Christopher for the rest of your lives." "Buck is committed," Eddie said before he could think about what he was saying. "He's not going anywhere." There was a pause on the other end of the line. "When you say committed…" she asked hesitantly, voice trailing off.

Friends I am loving writing this so much so far!! It's already 4k and I still have so much planned for it! I don't usually post fics before they're finished but I couldn't help myself, I have to share it! (Plus I'm hoping that by doing so I'll motivate myself to stay focused on it and finish it without jumping around to other projects instead.)

I hope you like it!!

-

taglist:

@dluoser @taketheplanspinitsideways @loudenthusiastic @wallywise @mxrcjqckspnchqsc

@therosesaredying @stillfuckingtired @classtrialguru @smolfunpenguin @blackdragonofthenights

@awesome-igi @natnuszsstuff @olliesrants @crazyfangirlallert @delirium1995

@brah3280 @meanceclosetohell @anythingeverythingallofthetime @sunflower-eddiediaz

@darkrose6578 @veronae-buddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @inell

@spicyrottingbrains @gnoeltop @idealuk @donationwayne @lemotmo

@smilingbuckley @realpersonwithrealfeelings @superlock-in-the-tardis @strxwbereee

@idontknowwhatimdoing777 @ashleigh2658 @mari-lwyd-fannibal-blog @mineyneedsmoney

@spotsandsocks @unlifeira @pirrusstuff @buddiedaydreamer911

@littlevampireprincessuniverse @misshiss727 @i-put-the-star-in-bastard @hermioneindisguise @dangerpronebuddie

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@moira112 @mjthe14thdoctor

Let me know if you'd like to be added or removed 💕

[eddiediaz-week]

I Used To Scream Ferociously

613 words | Mature

TW: Suicide mention, Depression, Anxiety, Drug Overdose, Car Accident

@eddiediaz-week Prompt: Whump

@911bingo Bingo Square: Eddie Diaz

Eddie was quick to grab it from where it sat in his closet, pivoting to slam it into the wall. The head of the bat stuck in the plaster, leaving a gaping hole where smooth drywall once sat.

OR: Eddie's mental breakdown in Fear-O-Phobia.

Ao3 Link: I Used To Scream Ferociously - brittwrites - 9-1-1 (TV) [Archive of Our Own]

[eddiediaz-week]

Eddie Diaz Week has ended!

We want to thank everyone who participated in our event last week!

We ended up with 57 works in our Ao3 collection this year (with more to come in the coming weeks.)

Be on the lookout for what we have coming next for you all!

[eddiediaz-week]

Life Updates Pending|M|3020 Words

Read on AO3

Fandom: 9-1-1

Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz

Characters: Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley, Bobby Nash, Original Character

Tags: Eddie Diaz Week 2024 (9-1-1 TV), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Divorced Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Probationary Firefighter Evan "Buck" Buckley, Probationary Firefighter Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Eddie Diaz only recently moved to Los Angeles, Fire Academy Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley as Buck 1.0, Bobby Nash is So Done, Married Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Secretly Married Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Insecure Evan "Buck" Buckley, Woke Up Married, Fade to Black, Kissing, Neck Kissing, Body Appreciation, Soft Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley

Summary: The first morning of the rest of their lives with a side of serious discussion. And Bobby reacts months after the fact.

Eddie Diaz Week - September 22 - Quote: “I’m not telling anyone else.” - SFW: Woke Up Married

@eddiediaz-week

[eddiediaz-week]

Eddie Diaz Week 2024: Sunday

Prompts: “I’m not telling anyone else.”, Woke Up Married, Friends with Benefits

A reminder your writing prompts for the week can be found here and your Ao3 collection can be found here.

If you have written something this week and not been reblogged, please send a message to us!

[eddiediaz-week]

Finished just in time for Ryan Guzman birthday! @eddiediaz-week

[eddiediaz-week]

A Birthday Wish

ao3 | Teen | 2k

Eddie wanted to spend his birthday eve with Buck, but he was unavailable.

Buck promised he would be back in time for Eddie's birthday with his present.

Prompt fill for Eddie Diaz Week: Day 6 - SFW Prompt "Birthday Celebrations"

@eddiediaz-week

Read on ao3

[eddiediaz-week]

Saturday

I wrote this for day 6 of @eddiediaz-week for the prompt "Well that was..." "Yeah". It's the sixth and penultimate part of the A Life in the Week series (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5), which you can read under the cut or on AO3.

Rating: T Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Category: M/M Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV) Relationship: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Evan "Buck" Buckley Additional Tags: Drabble; Past Character Death; (in 'Friday'); yeah these drabbles are consecutive... oops; I forgot to mention that; Marriage Proposal; Eloping; Las Vegas Wedding; Established Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz; Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz; Evan "Buck" Buckley and Eddie Diaz Are In Love; Nervous Evan "Buck" Buckley; Eddie Diaz Week 2024 (9-1-1 TV) Summary:

“You’re thinking about it too, right?” Buck blurted out once they’d cleared the dishes. “The women at that call, yesterday?” Eddie was, of course. Buck knew him too well. He avoided Buck’s gaze. “Buck, that—” “Wait.” Buck gripped his arm with one hand and his cheek with another. Eddie had no choice but to meet his eyes. “I’ve been thinking about that call. About—about what it means. About— You know, how uncertain every day is, and—and I’ve been thinking,” he wet his lips, “about how much I love you.” Eddie rested his hands on Buck’s waist. “Me too.”

The admission seemed to make Buck even more nervous. He opened his mouth, failed to find the right words, then blurted out, “Let’s drive to Vegas. We can get married tonight and come back tomorrow.” He winced.

Eddie floundered. “Buck, I—”

“Marry me?” Buck asked again, and—and—

How could Eddie say no?

“Well, that was…” Unexpected.

“Yeah.” Buck swallowed nervously.

Eddie leaned in to kiss him, then rested their foreheads together when he pulled away. “Yes.”

Buck’s face lit up. “Yes?”

“Yes, Buck. Tonight,” Eddie confirmed. “But you’re driving.”

Buck breathed out, “I love you,” and kissed him again.

[eddiediaz-week]

Eddie Diaz Week 2024: Saturday

Prompts: “Well that was…” “Yeah”, Birthday Celebrations, Pillow Princess

A reminder your writing prompts for the week can be found here and your Ao3 collection can be found here.

If you have written something this week and not been reblogged, please send a message to us!

[eddiediaz-week]

Friday

Fifth part of the A Life in the Week series (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4) written for the @eddiediaz-week prompt Supernatural elements. It's a drabble, so you can read it under the cut or on AO3.

Rating: T Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Category: Multi Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV) Relationship: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Evan "Buck" Buckley; Original Female Character(s) Additional Tags: Drabble; Minor Character Death; Ghosts; Canon-Typical Violence; Grief/Mourning; Skeptic Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV); Comforting Evan "Buck" Buckley; Established Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz; Eddie Diaz Week 2024 (9-1-1 TV) Summary:

“No, I’m telling you, Eddie, something—something was tugging me this way!” Eddie knelt by the wounded woman and checked her pulse — it was weak. “Get the stretcher,” he told Buck, who instantly ran back to the ambulance. He examined the woman, but all he could find were some superficial cuts and a worrying head wound. Buck returned; they lifted the woman on the stretcher. Her eyes fluttered open. “Jamie?” “Who?” Buck asked, his head snapping toward his left. “Wife.” Buck tugged on Eddie’s arm and pointed at the mess of trees and bushes and branches that hid another body.

They wrapped up the scene of the accident. Eddie couldn’t get the woman and her now deceased wife out of his mind. Apparently neither could Buck. They had always been on the same wavelength.

“You’re not gonna believe me,” Buck said, “but I swear I only found them thanks to Jamie’s ghost. She had to be the one tugging my arm.”

Eddie shook his head. “Let’s just go.”

“I—I mean, can you imagine that? Saving the love of your life even in death?”

Eddie swallowed. “Yeah.”

Buck took one look at him and pulled him into a tight hug.

[eddiediaz-week]

there is a swelling storm, i'm in the middle of it all a fic by @reyesdiaz for @eddiediaz-week

They’ve had the conversation about the telepathy; Buck’s not really supposed to use it on Eddie unless there are special circumstances, like something happens on a call or if Eddie specifically asks him to; or if he can tell there’s something Eddie can’t say that he needs to hear. Other than that, Evan tries his hardest to stay out of Eddie’s mind – for both of their sakes. It’s not always a pleasant place to be, for either of them.

or day 5 of eddie diaz week - supernatural elements / 'what are we?' T | evan buckley/eddie diaz | 1k

read on ao3 or under the cut

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⋆⋅☆⋅⋆It takes control of the person I thought I wasThe boy I used to knowBut there is a light in the dark,And I feel it’s warmth,In my heart, in my handsBut why can’t I hold on?– Waves, Dean Lewis⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

Eddie loves Buck. He loves spending hours at the younger man’s kitchen island, drinking beer like it’s water and bantering until the late hours. He loves when he wakes up in the bunks, and Buck’s sweet snores can be heard across the room. He loves when he has too much to drink and ends up crashing at the loft, and he loves the way Buck’s hands find their way under his shirt, under his boxers, sending sparks across his skin and warmth into the pit of his stomach.

He really does love Evan.

But he doesn’t want to talk about it; because talking about it means that either he loses Buck forever, or he has to marry the man tomorrow; it’s a psychological tornado he pulls himself into; he blames the Catholic upbringing, the all-or-nothing of the church, mostly, but there’s still an element of the loss he faced when Shannon passed. He can’t afford to let anyone in like that again, halfway between a forever love and a hookup.

And so when Evan said that; what are we? , like the tender, drunken sex and lingering glances and far-from-platonic pats on the shoulder weren’t enough; like it needs a word, a definition, a string of conditions, Eddie ran.

Not literally; he’d said something witty about firefighters and that they were late for work, before leaving the bedroom to get dressed and grab some ibuprofen. Buck had seemed mostly himself by the time they’d actually left Eddie’s place, and entirely back to normal when they got to the station.

That’s probably the only perk of Buck’s ability; he knows when it’s about him, and when Eddie’s experiences get in the way, when the situation is just… complicated. He can differentiate.

They’ve had the conversation about the telepathy; Buck’s not really supposed to use it on Eddie unless there are special circumstances, like something happens on a call or if Eddie specifically asks him to; or if he can tell there’s something Eddie can’t say that he needs to hear. Other than that, Evan tries his hardest to stay out of Eddie’s mind – for both of their sakes. It’s not always a pleasant place to be, for either of them.

There was a stretch of time where Eddie’s bad nights, the ones where it takes hours to fall asleep and almost no time to wake up, were accentuated by Buck; times when the darkness took over in the bunkroom, and Eddie would wake up to Buck sitting on the end of his bed, eyes red-rimmed and arm over a bent knee, watching the older man shuffle upright under the sheets. Nights when his nightmares woke Evan first.

That had become a second rule with Buck’s ability; don’t eavesdrop on my sleep.

Eddie thought the nightmares wouldn’t keep Buck up anymore, that it would just be him and his thoughts in a dark room of sleeping people. He figured the bad nights could be his own, and not an agony for them to share. 

He thought that was that. 

⋅⋆⋅

Eddie’s hands are shaky, and the air is cold, when he wakes up that night. The room is pitch-black, and he knows just from the lumps in the beds either side that it’s still well and truly the middle of the night. And despite every hair standing up and the sweat pooling on his skin, he knows the nightmare isn’t what woke him up.

Because Buck’s broad hands are on his arm, shaking him awake, and the younger man’s face reads with a fear and urgency that Eddie hasn’t seen since they established the boundaries. Eddie sits up quickly, pulling away from Evan like he’s been burned – what ever happened to boundaries?

“I know, I’m sorry.” Buck whispers, voice cracking. “Stop. Stop that.” Eddie hisses. “Why did you wake me up? We had an agreement, you’re not supposed to eavesdrop on my dreams, Evan, for fuck’s sake.” I– I swear, I tried not to, Eds. I…You were…” “ What?” “You woke me up.”

Eddie leans back against the headboard slowly, letting out a weak sigh. He runs a hand through his hair, tilting his head back to face the ceiling before dropping his hands back onto the sheets.

“You were screaming.” Evan’s voice comes out hoarse, jaw clenching as he swallows slowly. “You were– you were screaming, so loud, Eddie, in the dream, and it woke me up, and you wouldn’t stop moving, and I– I had to wake you up. I couldn’t just let you sleep through that, it was– it was awful. ”

Eddie reaches out his palm gently, linking his fingers with Buck’s carefully, watching the way his expression softens at the action.

“I’m sorry,” Buck’s tone is so sincere, so sad; “I’m so sorry I had to wake you up, I know you said that– you asked me not to listen in, and I wasn’t trying to, I promise you, I wasn’t–” “Evan, Evan, ” Eddie pulls the mans hands between his own, looking carefully into his eyes. “You listen to me now, okay? It’s not your fault. You…You pulled me out of a bad place, Evan, you did that. Thank you. ”

Buck looks away from Eddie, pulling at the top of his shirt with a quiet noise, almost a whimper. “You were screaming, Eddie. Like you were in pain, like– like you were dying. You wouldn't stop screaming. ” “I’m sorry.” “You were screaming.”

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[eddiediaz-week]

If you deny me one of your kisses (I won't divorce you)

“Evan Buck Diaz! Get your ass in here!”

or, Eddie full names Buck for... very valid reasons according to him

(Title from Tom Fletcher's wedding speech song - submission for Eddie Diaz Week 2024 - Friday prompt: "What are we?" - @eddiediaz-week)

“Okay, bye! Have a great day, babe!” Buck yells as he runs down the corridor. “Evan Buck Diaz! Get your ass in here!” A few seconds pass before a sheepish Buck appears in the kitchen doorway. “Full name?” he asks in an amused voice. Eddie raises his eyebrows. “Kiss me goodbye.” Buck throws his head back laughing before closing the space between them. Eddie barely has time to dry his soapy hands before Buck grabs his face and drops a quick kiss on his mouth. Eddie frowns. “What are we? Ninth graders? Give me a proper kiss.” And Buck does.

on ao3

[eddiediaz-week]

Do you have any idea how gorgeous you are when you are tripping?

Eddie is face down on the ground, arms and legs akimbo, but luckily still clutching the ice cream tub in his hand.

or, Eddie is a little shit and Buck is Fond™

(Title from the poem Honey by the best poet in the world, aka Andrea Gibson - submission for Eddie Diaz Week 2024 - Thursday prompt: "Be gay, do crime" - @eddiediaz-week)

“Shit!” Eddie scrambles from the couch, trips on his own socks – okay, they might be Buck’s and slightly too big – and falls to the ground in the most dramatic way possible. He falls for so long, Buck has time to get to the living room door and watch him fall for several seconds. Eddie is face down on the ground, arms and legs akimbo, but luckily still clutching the ice cream tub in his hand. The silence stretches for several seconds then… “For a second there, watching you fall for that long, I thought I was in a telenovela.” Eddie pouts at Buck’s words and tries to shuffle in an upward position, retaining as much of his dignity as possible – or at least, what’s left of it. “Wanna explain to me what’s in your hand?” Eddie, sitting on the floor of his living room, cheeks flushed bright red, juts his chin out and shakes his head once. “Nah, I’m good thanks.” Buck raises his eyebrow. “I thought we agreed last time you wouldn’t steal my ice cream anymore?” Eddie maintains eye contact with Buck as he eats some more, shrugs and says “As Karen always says, “Be gay, do crime.””

on ao3

[eddiediaz-week]

mer Eddie for @eddiediaz-week Day 5: Supernatural Elements/Creatures

His tail is inspired by lionfish (Pterois) which happens to be called Feuerfisch (fire fish) in German. You can't quite see it, but the fins/frills along the right side of his tail are ripped to kind of mirror where he was shot in canon.

[eddiediaz-week]

can you find me soon, because i'm in my head? a fic by @reyesdiaz for @eddiediaz-week

After the man fell – Eddie can’t even remember his name – Evan Buckley stayed there. He assisted the other passengers in getting down from the ride, and then he’d just sat on the back side of the tracks, high above the world in his harness, until his captain called him to climb down to head back to the station. Long after the five passengers had left in their aid car, he’d rested on the thick steel, looking up at the night sky with an expression so similar to the one he’s wearing now.

or alt 2 of eddie diaz week - different job T | evan buckley & eddie diaz | 1.1k

read on ao3 or under the cut.

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⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ Lately it’s been hard, they’re selling me for parts, And I don’t wanna be modern art, but I’ve only got half a heart To give to you, and I hope it’s enough How can you miss someone you’ve never met? ‘Cause I need you now, but I don’t know you yet – IDK You Yet, Alexander 23 ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

Eddie was operating the ride the night the guy let go on the rollercoaster.

And yeah, it’s been playing on his mind a little – that can be expected of anyone, though, when they’ve watched someone die in their place of work. He’s seen far more gruesome deaths, in far worse conditions, with far worse outcomes. Ultimately, one guy refusing to take a hand and then consequently falling, while still tragic, is incomparably weak alongside the carnage Eddie saw on his tours; so he brushes it away, and he moves on with his week.

An event like a death from such a minor malfunction is nowhere near enough to shut the park, or even the ride; so Eddie’s been working the rollercoaster every night since, seeing as it’s a job nobody else seems to want to take.

The park has a mandated curfew of midnight, every night, so the crowds are usually gone by eleven, and the rollercoaster usually has its last run around half past; Eddie loves working the close shift, loves the quiet as the people drift off and suddenly an amusement park is just a shell. Just stalls, just rides, just stuff.

But a week after what park staff are referring to as “the incident”, just as Eddie’s locking the coaster platform gate, a familiar face appears around the corner of a row of stalls.

Firefighter Evan Buckley, who goes by Buck, has been on national television in the last week; the incident made it onto CNN, then NBC; Eddie would be lying if he said he hadn’t found the man intriguing on both, but his real curiosity lies in the way Buck had stayed on the rollercoaster.

After the man fell – Eddie can’t even remember his name – Evan Buckley stayed there. He assisted the other passengers in getting down from the ride, and then he’d just sat on the back side of the tracks, high above the world in his harness, until his captain called him to climb down to head back to the station. Long after the five passengers had left in their aid car, he’d rested on the thick steel, looking up at the night sky with an expression so similar to the one he’s wearing now.

Buck’s eyes are heavy and tired, his coat collar askew, gaze roaming desperately. It’s almost like he’s looking for answers, somehow, Eddie thinks. His hairs slicked neatly across his head, one strand loose at the front, and his hands are twisted together fidgeting.

“Hey, hi.” Eddie calls out, jogging over to the younger man and giving a little wave. Buck offers a nod in greeting. “It’s Buck, right?” Buck gives a small sigh. “So you’ve seen the news, then?” “How are you holding up?” Eddie dodges the question; ‘ yeah, but I’ve actually also been stalking you desperately, because not only are you stunningly beautiful, you also seem to be suffering, and I want to know you’re alright’ would probably be the most accurate answer to that question, and it’s probably not the best one to offer to a man he only briefly met.

“It’s been rough.” Buck’s voice is small, quiet in a way that seems not to suit him. “It’s been rough for me, but it’s been worse for his family.” “Is there anything I can do? I mean, you must be here for a reason.” “I…” Buck pushes his palms into his eyes hard, face screwed up. “I don’t know?” “Just…” Eddie gestures back to the ride. “Why don’t you come with me?”

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Nobody’s technically supposed to do this. But the ride is completely shut off, Eddie has a great sense of balance and he trusts that the firefighter can handle himself; besides, he’s never gotten in trouble for climbing the ride before. Especially not after closing.

He doesn’t climb to the top; he’s a dumbass, not suicidal, so he clambers twenty yards up the ramp and sits on the track, high above the stalls of the park, above the world. Where it’s just him and the starry sky stretching out for miles, until the glittering city lights of LA take over and the whole world around him seems aflame with the glow.

It’s perfect solidarity, he’s never brought someone up before. Not until now.

“Are we supposed to be doing this?” Buck says quietly, when Eddie gestures for him to settle on the track. “Isn’t this dangerous?” Eddie hums an acknowledgment. “You run into fire for a living. I think you’re used to danger.”

Buck just laughs.

The air goes quiet between them, and Eddie doesn’t know what to say, how to break it; Buck had just seemed so broken, in a way Eddie’s not seen since his tour finished, and it had burrowed into his own chest, an ache he can’t heal twisting through his body. It’s so foreign, too, because he shouldn’t care about Buck. Realistically, he shouldn’t. He shouldn’t feel all this for a stranger. But the pain is flooding him, for Evan, on his behalf or alongside him or out of pity for him , Eddie doesn’t even know. 

He must get uncomfortable with the quiet echo of car horns, or he just wants to talk, because it’s only a few minutes before Buck breaks the silence; his mouth barely seems to move, but his words are loud – maybe that’s just the weight of them, though. “He wouldn’t grab my hand.”

Eddie tears his eyes from the city lights to look at Buck; his eyes are soft, sad, but his mouth is a thin line, and his hands are clenched into fists in his lap.

“It’s not your fault, Buck.” Eddie whispers. Buck scoffs. “Right.” “It’s not. ” “I had one job, Eddie.” Buck says firmly, looking out at the hills in the distance, headlights streaking the horizon. “I had one job: save the guy. That is what I get paid for, that is what I trained for, that is what I wanted. And I didn’t do it. I couldn’t get him to grab my hand.”

Eddie doesn’t know what to say to that, so he says nothing; nothing, nothing, nothing, for the rest of the night. He and Buck just sit on the tracks for hours, until the dawn peeks over the horizon and their backs both ache, and then they climb back down to the stall.

Buck leaves without a goodbye. Eddie has to stop himself calling out to the man’s retreating figure.

“Stay safe,” He whispers, but the wind steals the words away, and Evan disappears around the corner again.

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thank u sm!! reblog to support my work?

[eddiediaz-week]

everyone else sees what you never see a fic by @reyesdiaz for @eddiediaz-week

It’s agonising and it’s stupid and he should’ve just asked Josh on a date, because that would’ve been simpler and far less tense in the first place. Instead, he’s stuck next to someone he still calls a friend; someone who looks way too good in his blue suit jacket, and has spent the majority of the night passing Eddie beers, tossing out relationship jokes, and overall just making him feel closer and closer to losing his mind.

or day 4 of eddie diaz week - fake dating / 'be gay, do crime' T | eddie diaz/josh russo | 1k

read on ao3 or under the cut

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⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ They think we’re a couple,They bought us some booze,We shared the moscato and laughed, cause it’s true to me And I’d be embarrassed, if I weren’t so pleasedThat everyone else sees what you never see We’re perfect together, but I’ll never be the one– Footnote, Conan Gray ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

It’s a common misconception; because he married a woman, and he’s not been out with a guy since he left Texas, and he’s the farthest thing from effeminate, everyone assumes he’s not into guys. Which he tried to convince himself was true – again attributing to the avoidance of femininity – but frankly it’s not. Eddie doesn’t feel the need to slap a label onto it like a goddamn pickle jar, but he supposes if you’re going to categorise the uncategorizable, he’d be a male-leaning bisexual man. 

He tends to just go with “queer”. 

But this is the first time Eddie’s actually dared to bring a guy out to a 118 event, and yeah, it might just be a friend posing as his boyfriend for the sake of both of them, and maybe he has a fat crush on Josh that externally appears to have come to a point, but internally hasn’t; but he still brought a guy to a wedding with all of his best friends present, and it was far too shocking to the lot of them, he’s decided.

“Did we work out,” Josh says quietly, handing Eddie a beer on his return from the bar. “What we’re going to say after all this?” “Uh, not really.” Eddie takes it gratefully, taking a long sip.

He’s needing all the help he can get to push through this wedding; he’s struggling to remember why, exactly, he thought it would be a good idea to fake-date Josh for the sake of this event; mostly it’s self-torture, because their shared interest in men has resulted in Josh pointing out various guys, for both himself and Eddie to check out.

Eddie’s eyes mostly just give them a once-over, turning back to see what Josh seems to be thinking; but every time he looks back, Josh has already looked past the guy, onto the next one.

It’s agonising and it’s stupid and he should’ve just asked Josh on a date, because that would’ve been simpler and far less tense in the first place. Instead, he’s stuck next to someone he still calls a friend; someone who looks way too good in his blue suit jacket, and has spent the majority of the night passing Eddie beers, tossing out relationship jokes, and overall just making him feel closer and closer to losing his mind.

“We should go say hi,” Eddie eventually says, when the number of guys that Josh has pointed out has ticked well over the number of drinks Eddie’s had so far. “To Buck and Tommy, I mean.” “Yeah, let’s go.”

Buck swore up and down he refused to spend his wedding day trying to say hello to everyone who joined them; so he and Tommy have set up a table against the back wall of the tent, where people can come periodically and they can stay close to each other; the bar is at the other end, and the dance floor right in the middle, so they’re kept away from the majority crowd and can enjoy each others’ company and still get to see people as the night went on. It was the perfect solution, actually, and Eddie admired it; he spent most of his own wedding day wandering around the gardens, saying hello to everyone while his new wife was on the other side of the crowd.

A few yards from the table is a smaller, round table, set with a little A-sign chalkboard and a green ceramic bowl; in wide, swooping white letters, the board reads Honeymoon Fund, accentuated with two thick, curved exclamation points. The bowl is overflowing with notes, mostly five or ten dollars, but a significant number are more than that. Eddie swipes a twenty, slipping it into his shirt pocket.

“Seriously? You know when people say ‘ be gay, do crimes’ , theft is usually not what they mean.” “Hey, if these buffoons are trying to get me drunk with an open bar, they can pay for the uber home.”

Josh allows a small smile at that, before he puts an arm around Eddie’s waist.

“What?” He says at the face Eddie pulls. “If we’re getting away with the dating thing, we need a little touch of PDA. You and I both know its a whole thing for me.” “Yeah, you’re right.” Eddie says quietly.

He doesn’t say anything about the way Josh’s hand on his waistline burns into his skin so wonderfully, or the way that being so tight against his side feels so right, even if it’s all pretend. They click together like two pieces of the same puzzle, but for some reason Josh doesn’t even seem to see it, and Eddie feels like he’s screaming at a deaf man.

“Hey, Eddie.” Buck smiles when the pair approach the table, standing up to hug his best friend, Tommy doing the same, before they both do the same with Josh. “How are you two? How’s the night going?” “It’s brilliant.” Josh tilts his head slightly in that way Eddie’s noticed now. “You planned quite the event.” “He’s more than just a pretty face.” Tommy snakes an arm around Evan’s waist, planting a kiss on his cheek.

“How’s the date night going?” Evan bites his lip, a grin creeping through. “Really well,” Josh says, looking over at Eddie; it’s annoying how good he is at this. “But I think my date’s getting a little empty there, so we’re going to take advantage of that open bar. There are mistakes yet to be made tonight!”

Tommy laughs at that, waving them both away, but Buck grabs Eddie’s arm while Josh starts to head for the bar, whispering in Eddie’s ear quickly. “You’re so down bad, oh my god. Go wife him up, God’s sake.”

Eddie just shakes his head with a smile, following in Josh’s path through the people, catching up to him just past the dance floor and sidling up alongside him. “You’re too good at that.” “At what?” “Convincing people we’re together.” “Oh, sweetheart.” Josh quickly orders their drinks at the bar, taking a glass of gin and handing Eddie yet another bottle of beer. “I just have that natural charm, you know?” He teases.

Eddie just laughs. If only you knew.

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