||he/they||gay//trans||artist||commisions open!||trigun brainrot||plantcest//proshippers DNI
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mood currently
#eddie yaps#i am so fuxking cooked#ive just accepted it at this point#i just have to keep going or kill myself#i think im gunna go for the second one though#i feel so sigma!#(i feel hopeless)#even a mental ward couldnt save me bro#i will find a way#if theres a will theres a way#and i definitely have a will#sighs#idk man#its a problem#sighs sadly#i cant do this shit anymore#im going to die#i just have a feeling#and#i just have so many thoughts#its hell#i hate it here#i hate it so much#i hate being me#sobs#cw vent#cw sui ideation
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sighs. today has been a day. i have accepted the “fuck it we ball” mindset and it is kind of helping. my circumstances cannot change and im just kinda cooked so i just have to suffer for awhile
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how is it almost 2025 and im STILL mentally ill can my brain like. lock into being normal next year or something
#eddie yaps#shaking my head#be normal maybe#jeez#sighs and looks away while leaning on something like a southern father
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just realized yhe reason i was so scared of my dad for the entirety ofy life is because hes not aggressive towards us but towards his environment
he is also agressive to other people just never us (atleast not usually — him in 2014-16 is a different story) anyways i think it rubbed off on me a little 🙁
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i desperately need a shoulder to cry on but he has single handedly removed my ability to have a support system that isnt my family. i am entirely alone because of him. i used to live for everyone else around me, but now when i have nobody to live for it takes away the need to live. i have genuinely never wanted to kill myself more than i do now and it is all his fault. i have no friends and no real support system. i have nobody and nothing to live for except for myself and i do not like myself. i have no purpose and no drive to do anything anymore. i feel so empty. i feel entirely hollowed out.
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the rage is gone and now all i feel is a sad emptiness do you guys think gang will forgive me if i say sorry for blocking him
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guys i lowkey might’ve crashed out a little too hard and now i feel bad. err uhh guys am i cooked ⁉️
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ii love social media you guys get to watch me go thru a mental break in real time!!!!
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i love october/novenver. the weather is perfecy cold and its cloudly 24/7.. i dont like the summer though… june is when WOKEward comes out…
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PAPA NEEDS A BLUNT !!! I SWEAR TO GOD IF THIS KID THATS JUDGING WITH ME FOR SPEECH AND DEBATE DOES NOT BACK UP!!!! 🙁🙁😔
he is stressing me OUT!! tobias GO AWAY leave me ALONE PLEASE
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"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back
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im crying even the birding groups are memeing on this shit
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