eatingfood

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My favorite season.

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tagged by @missaustralia some recent pictures x

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Zodiac Plate and Serving Bowl from The Last Line

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about to sell my gucci mary janes online, god it hurts but I never wear them and I need money

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Never be hard on the past, time teaches.

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came across one of my first loves on bumble, I was 16 and naive! that’s 15 years ago, so wild, I never knew her sun sign but her birthday was in June. She lived at the other side of the country and I travelled 3,5 hours by train for her. She’s a marine now. Such coincidence that 3 people I used to date were all gemini’s without even being into astrology.

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moon into leo

do a little self love today. you deserve a treat. then if you have energy left for it after that, generous acts towards others are auspicious under this moon, much more so if you don't expect anything in return. sometimes it just feels good to be good.

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Catherine Deneuve in L’Agression (1975).

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- Shirley Jackson, We Have Always Lived in the Castle

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girl something good has to happen at some point

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And as we navigate the news and footage of massacres in Gaza every hour of every day, this ugly world is still trying to justify the unjustifiable and we're supposed to continue to convince every one of our humanity. What a sick reality this is. What a sick fucking reality.

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Sitting on my balcony in the sun

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Why does it look like everyone in public has connections, friendship, community or a relationship. I know that’s not the case but how I feel right now makes me think that. I’m exhausted from trying to find likeminded people, haven’t even come to the point of meeting up.

Imagine if I do meet up with someone and I come off extremely attached because I’m just super interested and eager to form an actual connection and friendship again. (I know, I’m never too much for the right people)

I have created a secure attachment style but a tiny part of me is afraid I will seem like I have an anxious attachment style like I used to.

So much healing has come in the years of being alone, but there’s still so much trauma around friendship, I never had a healthy, decent friendship or one that didn’t take advantage of me, not really anything that deserved my energy. At least I know myself enough to not let that happen ever again.

I’m going on 5 solo trips this year, I don’t know if I will do that many next year. I’m longing for company, that hyper independence isn’t good and doesn’t make me happy. I’m picky, I will not be desperate and I’m not wasting anyone’s time, it has to be good and true.

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She’s right

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As a creative, the most important thing is to not wait until you’re inspired to get started. There’s always something you can practice, or even simply admire and learn from. And if that practice doesn’t spark something up for you, you bank it for a later date. Inspiration doesn’t come unless you create space for it.