earthwaxx

[earthwaxx]

Phil Stainer

Phil A. Stainer was a 70 year old man. Devout of a faith he could not place a finger on, he died surrounded by loved ones but only one friend. Every year of his life had been filled with the same amount of intrigue and awe as every other person on the street that you and I don’t talk to, don’t make acquaintances with on a daily basis. It was not for this reason that Phil had earned his fate, though rest assured if one did live his life, they would not be surprised, but rather it blossomed from some obscure action no one had witnessed, and Stainer himself had not remembered. It happened in a great flash of light, a hue the same as his wife's favorite that had just as quickly vanished into a dull grey. 

“Nothing has happened in these last 138 words”

As Phil recalled this phrase to himself aloud, my great and terrible voice rang back.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry I was not capable of writing the great booming voice I had imagined writing of”

“I’m sorry I let you die surrounded by but one friend”

“But I let you die happy, is that not enough?”

The nameless man looked back at the child who raised him, who let him in here.

“It is a critique of you just as much as myself”

“In these fleeting words I have learned so much of myself and my origin that you yourself could not gain, that I cry myself silly thinking of how small I was, and how small you are”

In a room with light blue walls and a yellow spinning fan on top, hands molded at clay, trying to make something worthy of being shared. 

In a place between the heavens and earth a 70 year old man talks to himself and quickly stops existing.

“Maybe 310 could mean something deeper”

In 316 vague words someone somewhere had tried to make something beautiful and true. Something so desired by someone, that they had forgone humor and jest to avoid the thought of even possibly including irony. In an attempt to push away from a plastic face that could so easily seep into the skin. Someone gently pressed plastic buttons and took an occasional cursory glance to the left right to see if someone had looked back, to see what someone was doing.

“Someone can be anyone”

It thought.

“But there are two people someone can be.”

It typed.

“What if people get the wrong idea?”

It went back and corrected and misspelled. 

Someone didn’t put proper punctuation in order to mean something. Phil would not put a period or question mark at the end of his sentences to neglect thought. To neglect voice. I thought about why I am still typing. We have caught back up to the present moment. I want to show this to anyone, but what if they look at me waffling on about whatever and get the wrong message. I am happy I just want to write something meaningful. It is not a cry or a shout but a mumble. Fumbling over someone’s own words, someone tried to finish this quick work. What does it mean. What gets put in quotes and what doesn’t. Will it come back to this. Should I come back to Phil Stainer? Phil didn’t get anything. This was supposed to be about a death bathed in light but it got out of my thoughts. Phil Amelia Stainer died at the age of 70 surrounded by loved ones and one friend from a disease that no longer could matter or exist. He bought his one grandchild an embroidery kit for their 7th birthday just three months, one week, and three days ago. When he died he rose up from his body and into the heavens, but stopped after a fleeting second. Here, Phil had reached heaven’s very own limbo, not too far up, just a mile out from Pluto. It was also here that Phil had learned of his role in this world and the job of the one who made him. The minor miner mined for meaning in a white flat plane for almost an hour. The morsel of ore gained was not a new outlook or truth, but something more comparable to nostalgia. A mixture of a pleasant happiness and a small sadness for a world bereft of further meaning.

I came back to it.

I continue to layer thoughts one on top of another as if I am trying to take an objective look at myself as a person. What am I doing when this happens. Is there an effect to this cause or is it just another pastime for my brain so I don’t bore myself without some activity to be distracted with. Here in this document I get to voice my thoughts back at myself. I don’t want to call myself anything. I don't want to call myself smart and think myself better than others and I don’t want to call myself dumb for risk of a different sort of self-centered attention seeking via self depreciation. What is it now, just average? Do I tie myself to mediocrity? Is that worse than being bad, just unremarkable?

Someone stopped editing the document before a stinger or punchline could be added.

Someone came back to it.

As I lay down sheet after sheet of self objectifying criticism, I must ask what the purpose of it all is. I think about something, I think how another would view that immediate thought, I imagine what another would do with that knowledge of me thinking of others views of that thought. On occasion I stop myself, prevent myself from going deeper into the nature of “why” and “for what reason”, just so I can let myself enjoy a funny or scary, or otherwise entertaining thought without the burden of going deeper into my own head. Is it the want to dissect ego? Or could it be wanting to take the perspective of the superego? Am I trying to reach some sort of self-critique nirvana? That is, the eyes and tongue of a complete stranger?

Made by Earthwax

[earthwaxx]

Hello dear friends ❤️✋

Thanks to your incredible support, we have reached our first goal of $10,000 🎯💓!

We are deeply grateful for every donation that brought us closer to a better future.

Now, we have set a new goal: $10,500 💪🇵🇸.

This additional amount will help us in our search for a new home 🏠💚 — a safe and stable place for our family to rebuild our lives after losing everything.

Your continued generosity can help us take this crucial step forward. Please donate, even a small amount, and help us achieve this dream 🙏🍉.

https://gofund.me/abbc2759

With love and gratitude,

🇵🇸🍉

^ ^ ^

[earthwaxx]

Watercolor Giygas I did in art class

[earthwaxx]

I finally finished reading homestuck

[earthwaxx]

The rest of the inktobers that I forgot to post this year due to being lazy.

[earthwaxx]

Dear Supporter,

I hope this message finds you and your family in good health. My name is Eman Zaqout from Gaza. I am reaching you out to seek your urgent help in spreading the word about our fundraiser. I lost both my home and my job due to the ongoing genocide in Gaza and we are facing catastrophic living conditions. 💔

I kindly ask you to visit my campaign. Your support, whether through donating or sharing, will help us reach more people who can make a difference. Thank you for your continued support for the Palestinian cause. Your dedication brings us closer to freedom. 🙏🕊

Note: Verified by several people as 90-ghost and aces-and-angels. ☑

^

[earthwaxx]

Me casting forbidden dark magic to make my friends have the same hyperfixations as me.

[earthwaxx]

Hi 👋, My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔

I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $60,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future.

Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶

If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏

Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤️‍🩹

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗

👆👆👆

[earthwaxx]

in the dark worlds nobody jumps for the banana.

[earthwaxx]

Inktober day 5: Binoculars

[earthwaxx]

Inktober day 4: Exotic

[earthwaxx]

Inktober day 3: Boots

[earthwaxx]

Inktober day 2: discover

[earthwaxx]

Inktober day 1: Backpack

[earthwaxx]

i finished watching all one piece episodes 1-1119. Now I can finally watch actually anything else.

[earthwaxx]

i just finished playing pokemon ultra moon

[earthwaxx]

quick what’s ur opinion on tea. everyone who sees this is obligated to answer in some way