dryococelas01

[dryococelas01]

I had a near death experience and saw the afterlife and let me tell you

None of you fuckers are right

[dryococelas01]

Every lesbian in Brockton Bay wants Faultline

[dryococelas01]

vicky considers common acts of connecting with and reclaiming your body

[dryococelas01]

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[dryococelas01]

Worm AU where every cape has a magical girl style transformation they have to do to use their powers.

Eidolon is particularly fetching in his tri coloured dress that swaps colours depending on what powers he has.

I am once again trying to bait people into drawing art.

[dryococelas01]

A Labour MP just called Ann Widdecombe woke for saying that trans women should not be automatically banned from women's prisons and that, to quote:

"We have a duty to ensure [trans female prisoners’] safety too, and beyond all peradventure, they would not be safe in a male prison but liable to serious sexual assault, including rape,”

Ann Widdecombe woke

Ann Widdecombe

For context she used to be a tory and is now part of reform uk

For further context, when the church of England decided to ordain women priests she left the church of England for the roman Catholic church

She opposed repealing section 28 in 2003

She is against self ID. She expressed opposition to same sex marraige in 2014

A Labour MP just said that she is woke.

Now don't get me wrong. She still only highlights the danger to trans women in male prisons who have "undergone extensive surgery". She only seems to support trans women in female prisons if they have undergone every step of transition and pass (she talks about case by case basis), so she is not what anyone with sense would call 'woke'.

But a Labour mp just called her woke.

Ann Widdecombe.

What is going in with Labour man.

[dryococelas01]

Bonesaw gets cancelled on tumblr.

[dryococelas01]

Do you not see why people believe astrology tho??

so i'm a custodian.

whenever someone does something cool like shit on the bathroom floor or get blood all over a toilet, i have to close the bathroom down by blocking the doorway with a CLOSED sign.

this sign is big and bright. it says CLOSED in four languages and has a do not enter symbol. it completely blocks the doorway. the only way to enter is to look directly at the sign and either move it or climb over it.

almost every single time i shut down a bathroom so i can suit up and clean a biohazard, someone will enter the bathroom with a dead-eyed, slack-jawed expression and try to wordlessly walk past me to use a stall.

and every single time, i have to block their path and say, "this bathroom is closed. there is one directly down the hall, marked by signs. please leave," and they either try to argue that THEY specifically should be allowed to use this one, as if they are god's most special little guy, or express shock even though they, again, had to contend with the CLOSED sign to enter.

often, i am standing there in the middle of cleaning up bodily fluids having to firmly repeat myself. they always leave angry or confused.

anyways, you clicked this button to send me an ask about astrology:

[dryococelas01]

Interior decorator is such a specific job for Purity to have and yet somehow it fits perfectly for this racist probably mildly well-off to well-off white woman.

Like it's a perfect pull.

[dryococelas01]

The villains who have mundane jobs are so funny to me

Like purity

Do you think she was any good as an interior decorator? Or did she keep insisting on an all white colour scheme?

Think she blew up any of the places she decorated? Interior decorator in the day, exterior undecorater at night.

[dryococelas01]

Tbf if I was in cauldron I would definitely be constantly be 'revealing' details but as a joke

One of the funniest 'What if's' to me is the timeline where Kurt dragged Jack along to Cauldron. You can get the ultra powerful math nerd ☝️ but. You have to tolerate his stupid boy bestie.

Anyway they figure out soon enough that Broadcast is a thing, and Jack is now a secondary 'fixer' for Cauldron. He's less of a fine edge, more like a shotgun they can fire when they need a certain parahuman dead, and it's not worth wasting Contessa. Toss up if you're getting Boogeyman (scary hat lady) or boogeyman (guy who won't shut the fuck up and has a knife).

He keeps monologuing about the true nature of Cauldron to people, but then just kills them. Because like. Lol. Guy who cannot help himself with leaving breadcrumbs. But also it doesn't matter too much because again. He'll just stab you.

Doesn't care too much about the End Of The World thing, though he's less inclined to cause it on purpose. Marginally more well adjusted than canon in that way. Still just in it because (1.) they keep setting him on people so he can murder them (fun!) and (2.) Kurt is there (gay)

[dryococelas01]

One of the funniest 'What if's' to me is the timeline where Kurt dragged Jack along to Cauldron. You can get the ultra powerful math nerd ☝️ but. You have to tolerate his stupid boy bestie.

Anyway they figure out soon enough that Broadcast is a thing, and Jack is now a secondary 'fixer' for Cauldron. He's less of a fine edge, more like a shotgun they can fire when they need a certain parahuman dead, and it's not worth wasting Contessa. Toss up if you're getting Boogeyman (scary hat lady) or boogeyman (guy who won't shut the fuck up and has a knife).

He keeps monologuing about the true nature of Cauldron to people, but then just kills them. Because like. Lol. Guy who cannot help himself with leaving breadcrumbs. But also it doesn't matter too much because again. He'll just stab you.

Doesn't care too much about the End Of The World thing, though he's less inclined to cause it on purpose. Marginally more well adjusted than canon in that way. Still just in it because (1.) they keep setting him on people so he can murder them (fun!) and (2.) Kurt is there (gay)

[dryococelas01]

So they explicitly state the simurgh isn't fuckable

But they never say anything about the other endbringers

What's that behemussy like?

[dryococelas01]

It's between my "for you" and "your tags"

Like the shitty gherkins in my tumblr burger

This is terrible

They added an entire tab as an advertisement... and I can't delete it... this is not right.....

[dryococelas01]

Did anyone else here watch Steven Moffats dracula? Because that thing was a trip and a half.

In a bad way to be clear

[dryococelas01]

This shit is constantly happening to me

[dryococelas01]

Wildbow doesn't show it but every time armsmasters not on screen he is snorting cocaine to get the energy to tinker