dreamhopesmile - Tumblr blog

[dreamhopesmile]

Is it ok, to say that I still miss you...

[dreamhopesmile]

I'll find you -lecrae

Just fight a little longer my friend It's all worth it in the end But when you got nobody to turn to Just hold on and I'll find you Hey, There's gonna be a lot that's gonna go unsaid My emotions are all jumbled up I don't even know how to feel... In fact I'm so numb that I don't even feel like I'm living I want to wish you the best in life because I have genuine feelings for you and care about you But... I am hurt, I do have anger, I am upset... But I never wanted to say anything because I didn't want to put this on you I didn't want you to think that you couldn't make me happy I don't want you to think that you're not lovable or not worth it because you are and I truly was happy...I miss lying next to you watching you play overwatch the most...you seemed so happy it made me happy You are more than just sex, you're more than someone to use or make them feel happy You are yourself, a precious person who worked so hard and pushed through so much to get to where you are and even then you felt so lost....like nobody could see anything that you've been through, you felt so alone and that nothing mattered...but I want you to know that I can see it, I can feel it and so my heart will forever be with you. However the pain lingers...let me just vent just a little bit...because in the end it's not like you'll read this... You made me feel like I wasn't enough, I wanted to connect deeper or just a bit more because the distance was killing me...we were never on the same page...I never asked much from you...I thought I was enough...you hurt me too...the whole time I wanted to communicate more, yes, I probably was annoying but that's how desperate I was to not lose you....and you just walked away from me as if everything I did wasn't worth it in the end...yes I made a mistake to look at another man and make poor choices...but I was told that you were with 2 other girls aside from the 2 other girls you told me about...how am I supposed to feel about that? ...when I told you what I did you yelled at me and cursed at me...and yes you gave me another chance but it felt like it wasn't fair...I tried to hold on to you and u left me, what was I supposed to do? You were off with 4 different girls....it hurt me so much to think that we could be something different. Everything you said about me being the one and all, was it a lie? Did u really want to see me broken as well? Like all the other younger girls? Was I a part of your broken girl games? ....u said I was different...I trusted you. And you got so upset that I didn't trust you 100%....well now you know why ...I had the right to not trust you 100% But ....I won't blame you, I won't hate you....because I have hope in you, I'm gonna believe that you're good because you are. You break people because you yourself have been broken so many times...it's practically all you know...and I don't blame you for that. I'm gonna keep loving you, just hold on and I'll find you. You're struggling life, and I understand...I'm gonna find you, I'm gonna find the real you and pull you out. Just keep holding on, After everything you've been through, what you did, what you have seen, what you have said, I'm gonna find you and look straight into your eyes and tell you that I loved you ever since I laid my eyes on you. Just hold on and I'll find you.

[dreamhopesmile]

I can't find my home, I'm so lost...

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

No difference

It wouldn't make a difference if I were to stay or disappear... Life would go on I would just become a memory That's fine with me

[dreamhopesmile]

I'm known for my smile...I wonder why

[dreamhopesmile]

Can't forget

The past trauma haunts me... The way my dad almost killed my mom... The way my dad hit me... The way my sister abused me... They all tried to control me... There was no escape... This was my life... Can't forget it I'm chained to my past memories... They won't let me go... They always remind me this is my life...

[dreamhopesmile]

Thank you

Even if there's a chance that you'll hurt me, leave me, and even hate me I'm still going to thank you Thank you for giving me the chance to love you Thank you for teaching me how to grow Thank you for the moments we shared Thank you the memories we created Thank you for loving me for the time being Thank you for everything you have given me Love, hope, dreams, a better me

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

A persons feelings arent your personal games, so stop playing with them

[dreamhopesmile]

I don't know whats worse, being taken for granted or being played like a fool...

[dreamhopesmile]

[dreamhopesmile]

Me, myself, &I

Thought it was something But now I see it was nothing Guess I was the only one imagining Hoping it'd be something

[dreamhopesmile]

I know there’s someone they will always choose over me…

Follow for more relatable love and life quotes!