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Incest Survivor Resource List

I created this list because I haven’t seen anything else like it. I didn’t want it to be a big dump of links so I added little descriptions to each one so you can better find what you’re looking. I don’t really know what to say other than “you’re not alone” and “it’s going to be okay” and also “hi you have a safe place on my blog if you want to follow it but it’s okay if you don’t.”

You don’t have to be an incest survivor to use these resources, also. Hopefully this list can be helpful to everyone. Please share and boost it if you can!

Websites to check out:

Note: All of these spaces are inclusive of LGBTQ+, POC, disabled, and other marginalized communities.

Survivors of Incest Anonymous: A self-help recovery group modeled after Alcoholics Anonymous. To become a member you must be a survivor who is 18 years or older.

Incest AWARE: Has a wealth of survivor-centered resources, especially focused on survivors from marginalized communities. I really appreciate their inclusivity.

Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network: The nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organization. Operates the national sexual assault hotline. You will find LOTS of information and resources on this website.

What’s Okay: A website & helpline for teens and young adults. Have all of your questions about “what’s okay” when it comes to sex, healthy relationships, and sexual trauma answered with no judgement at all.

Stop It Now (UK version): A child protection charity that provides support, information, and resources on preventing child sexual abuse and keeping children safe. This is a great resource to learn about warning signs of abuse & other concerning behavior. This organization also provides support services to people who are concerned that they might harm a child.

For Ourselves: Reworking Gender Expression: Provides services and support for transgender/nonbinary people who have experienced any sort of violence or crime. Check out their resources for trans/nb survivors of sexual violence in particular. 🏳️‍⚧️

1 in 6: Resources, information, and support specifically for male-identifying survivors of sexual abuse. While the focus is on child sexual abuse, they also provide support to men who experienced SA in adulthood. They have a weekly support chat, facilitated by a counselor.

Sibling Sexual Trauma: This site provides resources for those affected by sibling sexual trauma. There’s a ton of information and recovery resources here for everyone.

Beauty After Bruises: Dedicated to helping survivors of childhood trauma receive funding and access to therapeutic support. You can apply for a grant if you are in need. They also have a blog that teaches self-help and coping techniques! It’s one of my favorites.

After Silence: Speak about your experiences anonymously and support others anonymously. 

Basic information:

What is incest?

Research & statistics on incest

What is COCSA?

What is sibling sexual trauma?

What is emotional incest?

What is secure & insecure attachment?

What is dissociation?

Warning signs of child grooming / adult grooming

Signs of childhood trauma

In recovery:

Recovering From Incest: If you don’t know what to check out first, I recommend starting here. 🖤

How to Heal From Covert Emotional Incest: (TW) The author shares her story of surviving emotional incest. At the end, you will find a list of books & videos that she found helpful for healing from this type of trauma.

Get Self Help: Probably the largest database of self-help resources I’ve ever found! There’s worksheets, pdfs, videos, audio, all kinds of tips and tricks. Go to this page and click on the subject that you need self-help advice for.

Transgender Sexual Violence Survivors: A Self-Help Guide to Healing and Understanding: SO GOOD. There’s TONS of information & resources here. It’s created by trans/nb people for trans/nb people, and it’s completely free. Please pick this one up! 🏳️‍⚧️

Advice Column: This column offers advice on multiple topics related to preventing and recovering from child sexual abuse. You can also submit your own questions, although I don’t know how quick they are to respond. EDIT: They usually respond in a few days!

Coping skills for complex trauma & dissociation: This link leads to a tag on Beauty After Bruises’ blog. Something I like about their blog is that it’s both informative and also casual. It’s written by someone with DID, and you can really feel that they understand what you’re going through. I found their post on nightmares especially useful!

Safety & Prevention: There are several articles here that give tips on how to stay safe as a survivor, such as what consent looks like and how to protect yourself on social media.

Consent: Even if you feel like you already know what healthy consent is, I recommend reading these pages. I love how they broaden the topic to be about more than just sex.

Sexual Safety At Home: Lots of good, important resources here about safe and healthy sex/sexual behaviors. Learn the GREEN FLAGS of sexual behavior!

What might be behind your physical pain: GREAT article from an incest survivor on chronic pain with “no known cause”.

Healing the inner child after incest abuse: Learn what an inner child is, how incest affects it, and how you can heal through reparenting. (TW) This one has some brief personal accounts of the author’s trauma.

Why survivors miss abuse: An article about why survivors might sometimes miss or crave being abused. I felt like it was a bit lacking but it’s still a good introduction to this topic.

Needing support right now:

National Sexual Assault Hotline: Call the number or online chat. There are also other hotlines & resources listed here.

What’s Okay Helpline: Call, online chat, and email counselors any questions you have about sex and relationships. There is also a large FAQ to check out!

Other Hotlines: This is just a big list of other hotlines that you can call, text, or chat in to receive support.

7cups: I love this website because you can talk to volunteers about basically any sort of non-crisis situation. Get advice or comforting words or just have someone to vent to. It’s free, but you can get access to mental health professionals if you pay.

Just for teens: Resources and support for teens who have or are currently experiencing incest or other sexual trauma.

How to get help & stay safe with an abusive family: These coping and safety tips are geared towards minors who are living with an abusive family. It can be useful for anyone, though!

Supporting a loved one:

TALK: A good starting place for supporters! 🖤

How to support a survivor: Very good advice and helpful links here. Pay attention to the points about marginalized survivors.

A guide for partners & friends of trans sexual violence survivors: MOST INFORMATIVE THING YOU WILL EVER READ! 🏳️‍⚧️

Helpful literature + more:

Books & films aimed at male survivors: These resources are aimed at men, but they can be useful for everyone. Content is divided into different columns so you can easily find what you’re looking for. They are upfront about how they select what they recommend. Each recommendation has a description about why they recommend it. GREAT RESOURCE.

Reading resources on childhood sexual trauma: These resources focus on preventing childhood sexual trauma & also healing from it. Literature is divided into different columns for professionals, supporters, adult survivors, and child survivors. There is also a section for research if you’re interested in that!

Books, children’s Books, & podcasts: These have all been recommended by survivors of incest & other sexual trauma. Only the children’s books & podcasts have descriptions.

SIA’s downloadable literature: These resources are aimed at adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse, especially incest. I haven’t read any of these yet but the prices are very cheap!

Recommended books on complex trauma: The books are divided into different columns, and all have short but good descriptions. Check out the column on books regarding trauma’s intersection with race, sexuality, and gender!

Carolyn Spring’s column on child sexual abuse: Carolyn Spring is an author, trainer, and trauma survivor who has DID. Anyone who experiences dissociation will probably find her articles very relatable but also highly informative!

Books about healing PTSD, Complex PTSD, and Dissociative Disorders: Everything is categorized so you can easily find what you’re looking for. They have short descriptions for each book. There is also a section for free resources!

RAINN Bookstore: These are books written by other survivors. This is a great place to go if you want to support fellow survivors or hear their stories.

Online Literary Magazine for survivors of sexual trauma: Read art, poetry, and stories from other survivors in this online magazine. It’s free!

Free trauma resources: These downloads were created by Carolyn Spring specifically for trauma survivors & professionals who work with them. I got the e-book and it’s been very helpful!

Free trauma & dissociation books: There’s some good ones here!

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

trying to fix it

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I FOUND MELATONIN! It barely helps but it is SOMETHING

I'm so fucking tireddd 😭 dear lord let me get some god damn sleep maybe? I couldn't find any sleeping pills I usually take so I just. Didn't. And I realized how fucking bad this gets when I don't take them. 😐😑😐. I gotta find that shit I'm gonna have a panic attack if I have to stay up this late AGAIN

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I'm so fucking tireddd 😭 dear lord let me get some god damn sleep maybe? I couldn't find any sleeping pills I usually take so I just. Didn't. And I realized how fucking bad this gets when I don't take them. 😐😑😐. I gotta find that shit I'm gonna have a panic attack if I have to stay up this late AGAIN

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

being 14 and talked down from off the ledge of a building by my 16 year old mostly online boyfriend who thought my psychosis was spirits haunting me for being a witch forever altered me in a way I can't describe. prob in a bad way let's be so fucking honest 😭

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

having an argument with someone I'd genuinely die for is fucking insane. like ok girl I'd jump off a bridge for u but rn ur kinda being a dick

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I feel weird about this honestly. Because like, if perisex ofab people don't make tfem flags to match their tmasc flags, there will be a fucking drought of tfem mogai identities. There already is one, actually, from people coining things and never coining a feminine counterpart to it because of this thought process! And it hurts! I really really want more mogai creators to make tfem flags, especially when they're as a counterpart to tmasc flags, because otherwise I genuinely can't participate in this community.

I'm back with another hot take this time with a focus on the MOGAI community and flag making. Please note that these are all personal takes and at the end of the day I can not control others actions. I purely do this because I enjoy talking about my views and what I dislike + like within the communities I fall inside. This is not to look down upon creators who do this simply how I find it uncomfortable.

While this is rare, I have noticed that perisex OFAB (observed female at birth) flag creators make transfem flags. This rubs me the wrong way as while the flags themselves are really pretty. I don't think it's really their place to make our flags. This same logic applies to perisex OMAB (observed male at birth) creating transmasc flags. This is more so directed at publicly posting the flags rather than simply creating them for a friend who is that trans label. This also again applies to perisex folks creating intersex flags. To me, it just feels... invasive? I personally want a tfem flag made by a tfem or a tmasc flag by a tmasc. It feels like there is a deeper connection to the identity and the flag.

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

being a bi lesbian is a lot like being Jesus. you get hate from people who don't even know you and you're also gods favorite

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

- maggot.

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

Being a bit more open about how I'm struggling with suicidal ideation is just. So refreshing. It doesn't have to be a dirty little secret anymore, I can mention it offhandedly with conversation with some people and they don't even bat an eye. I want to be more open about it in the future because it's just such a weight off my shoulders to be able to say "I don't think I can do this because of my suicidal ideation" and have the other person fully understand and not freak out or be disgusted.

I love my friends.

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I don't know which of us made this post but whoever did is being a pussy and should calm tf down. We mentioned our alters/parts casually in conversation today and!! Guess what!!! Nothing bad happened!!! Seriously, it's ok to be open about stuff. You'll live. We all will

I want so badly to tell one of my friends everything about being a system and how it impacts me and my memories and stuff but like ohhhh scary. Do they even wanna hear about that

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I'm the patron saint of girls who are also angry dogs

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

Hello! Here is a request for ya. Emotes/emojis (I never remember what the proper name is) for different locations based activities like…

- doctor’s visit

- therapy visit

- work

- errands

- parents house

I use SP and log these types of activities to help my partner & friends know how they can support me & my fellow headmates or if it’s better to leave us be.

yep! I also included some variations for one parent and three parent households

A white building with some bushes around it and a Red Cross sign on the top of it, in front and to the side of a large grey location symbol. This location symbol is in all in this set in the same position.

A brown building with a sign on top that has a heart overlaid with a white cross, to cover both physical and emotional/mental therapy. There’s a tree and a bush in front of it.

A yellow two story building with a green roof and a sign on the top that has a rotating gear and a coin design in the middle.

A to-do list with several boxes in front of the location symbol, some of them checked off with a red checkmark.

A blueish purple house with a genealogy chart overlaid on it. The chart extends beyond the house, so the child is outside the house while the parents are in it. This version has three parents.

The same symbol for parents’ house, but with two parents.

The same symbol for parnets’ house, but with one parent.

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

Me when yet another person I know turns out to be a predator 😁😁😁😁😁😁😁I'm totally ok and not super angry and re traumatized

[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

disordered heart and disordered mind

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[dogteeth-and-deerantlers]

I'm sorry, I didn't know. 2024, digital painting (clip studio paint)

A piece about having to re-parent yourself and the relationship we have with one of our youngest alters.