dizzy-and-friends

[dizzy-and-friends]

Kairah & Fio

Broken you already?

Kairah's bristling words spilled over the Nor Elf, and their breaths heaved like willows in a storm. The lustrious panting of the pale-haired Fio was like a sweet balm over Kairah's neck. Kairah slowly drew her head away from Fio's neck, blood dripping and pooling across Fio's collar bone.

There was no wound, or, not one worth mentioning. A simple blessing and small but potent candy shoved between Fio's pink lips was enough to hide the wound, but the blood stained a white dress regardless.

Kairah's black dress would also be stained, but none at the wedding would question her, and with Fio chained by the ankle to Kairah's wrist it would be fairly obvious to any but the most sloshed priest what had happened. Fio's blank mind melted into the future, and rekindled itself with the past. Her heart skipped a beat as her last synapse woke to whimper like a lost child. "My sister would be quite upset," Fio's eyes up started, pacing the room like the sun cleanses the rivers, and ended her consent with a hand up to stop Kairah's adventurous fingers. "Mistress, if you were to use me to upstage her wedding like this. Why don't we relax in the garden with the other couples. Take the air as you would so eagerly take me."

"You challenge me, but I accept. I would not want to spoil the wedding of my Properties kin. Come, Fio, I'll have you out among the blossoms and blooming white woods. Then all who dare trace your screams will be all but forced to know who I have taken." The Drow hoisted Fio into her arms and carried her through the narrow retreats of the human church, and all the while the two traded words. "Mistress you claim so oft that I, as weak as i am, Challenge you, the Baroness. I do detect some weakness that allows you to nurture my faith in you, as the gardener must love and care for the very blossoming flora you wish to stain with my essence." Kairah diligently carried Fio, her dress splitting at several seams, but still she pressed forward to the garden cloistured by the sacred walls.

"My dear pet, I am no petty dwarven cleric. My contract on your life includes yet 7 more eclipse cycles, and here I am nary before the first. As you are mine, and I am your care taker, I take no pride in breaking your faith in me. As your religion, I am goddess. A goddess would not abandon you so easily as to break you upon every utterance of the word 'No.' I shall bleed you upon ripe earth, among nubile flowers and under the bouquet of the sun. I shall deeply search within you for the soul that dare speak to me, and rip it out through your pursed lips. I will slay every thought in your mind with not but my tongue and sharp teeth. To pursue these desires with you this long, all you must do is consent, and your life will lay forfeit for the whole church and its dreadful gods to see. This temple will burn in your screaming mouth as I do it."

Fio had no thought to correct Kairah for slighting the dwarves, but in good time she would. After she stopped blushing, stammering, and giggling at the torrent of debauchery ahead of her. Fio, with her legs slung over Kairah's forearm, and her face burried deep into Kairah's hair to hide, Fio whispered "Disintegrate me, as I will rewrite the earth for you."

[dizzy-and-friends]

The Witness will then, as customary, remove your Flesh and Meat, until you are Spirit and sinew laid bare before the void. Here you will be made into a floating electric web  of vigilance, exposed to all expressions of faith by suffering and silence. Your suffering is eventually heard by  The Flayed Ones, who have come before you. They are hideous and distorted visages of sorrowful creatures that were observed, and tried, and found wanting. According to the gods, Flayed Ones confuse fear with envy and greed with love. This is too heavy on the Spirit. A Hellion is nothing without fear and love, as I have recently learned.

The Witness will open her maw when the Flayed Ones scream out for you, and they will spill forth from her glorious summits. Fight against their woeful tide, and once perched upon her formless beauty, collect your eyes once again. The Witness will consume you, but now you are able to see The Flayed Ones, who now scurry from your grace. In the darkness you will find her bile, and love, as they are a soup together. Drink only the acidic feeling, and as the pain boils through your thousands of delicate silk threads, a pure wreath of love and explosive multiplication will envelop you, and your Meat will be made new. Carry it with you, collect it unto your sinew and form bones from its marrow. Craft yourself in the Image of Her Love for you.

As you are now Meat, The Witness holds no taste for you. You are bitter, like a sour fruit is appetizing to see but rejected upon the caress of the tongue and teeth. 

In Her stinking filth where you land, The Witness lets you Craft your Flesh. It will hold your meat, and more, as it is as complex or simple as your feeble Meat can imagine it. Here, The Oath Taker must choose how complete they become. No Meat is too strong for the Flesh. 

As your form Completes, The Witness desires you again. Bring her the tithe that you promised Her and she will reward you for your generosity and strength. The Black Mother collects the tithe and The Oath is complete. If you have not been collected as a tithe in this time, rejoice in the splendor as you are now christened Transitory Hellion.

This is how my Alice became real to my rejuvenated eyes.

[dizzy-and-friends]

I'm retooling my book to be from the perspective of Alice's wife --- and obvious about it.

The gospel my radiant wife called ‘morning crier’ found a less appropriate description for the event, which I sent my more traveled servant to retrieve. The dating on the article is lost, and much of the gospel was torn during a wounding battle with fire. The translated text reads thus: “A mysterious and ghastly reminder that we cannot trust the Gypsy immigrants or barbaric back alley sneaks who hide amongst our noble cities. 25 innocents killed during an unprovoked murder spree at a noble charity gathering for art and culture. Bodies yet to be discovered. The killer is still at large. Unlikely witness claims a woman painted red with black hair and dark eyes was leading the blood bath.” I was appalled and shocked that the beginning of my happiness would be given such a ghastly memoir. 25 ascendants were declared missing and the home was demolished by the family favoring a memorial garden dedicated in memory of the lost souls present during “the Red Lady Masacre.” A lovely birthday present for the weightless feeling in my heart, Alice.

[dizzy-and-friends]

A lead brick, and a glass oven.

"She's dead, Leaf. Let it go. Stop this." Ten minutes after Umi pulled a gun on me, she finally held it at a low ready, just itching to take my leg out from under me. the conversation got really stale. She followed me onto this old balcony, watching the banquet through the tiled colours of stained glass and fake moonlight. Umi didn't have to chase me, I was here the whole time. This was my new grave-stone. 70 story tall Glass Bottle full of rich flats. If she shoots me here, at least I'll die before i hit the weird fake concrete. Her arguments were stale, and honestly, so were mine. We were both winded, tired, hungry. Thirsty... Her gun was met with my gun. My suit matched the white metallic finish, and all the dirt and blood from my hands. Quite a pair, Its a shame i never got this suit dry cleaned. I'd fill you in on the details, but... "She's alive, I saw her. If she died, you killed her. Don't bullshit me, Umi. We've been through too much. I saw her face, I kissed her on the fucking cheek before she got dragged out. My lips almost melted on her face, Umi, I know she was alive."

Umi grimaced at me, she hates this part of the talks. Every time she has to put me out, cool me off, its this whole missing girl case. It ate me up. It burned me. I was upside down about it. Umi probably orchestrated the whole thing to fix some bullshit between me and the girl's father. She obviously thought I was off my bullshit - but really I was just off my meds. I was going underground.

"You're a peace talker, Leaf. Always have been. You're not supposed to kick doors. You left that behind in the Eurocare death-squad. Leaf, please. Ira is gone. IRA. Is no more."

Umi had a way with words, she spoke in riddles. I didn't always understand them, because of this fucking language barrier. Her weapon stayed in I've gotten way better at it. I tend to learn how to speak local dialects faster when I'm deeper with the crowd. So I took my jacket off, maybe ease her mind a bit. I was only armed with the pistol and a dead-switch. Hooked to several metal pipes of her favorite colour. I was a walking cluster-mine, and at this height we were only a stone's throw away from the Glass wall between me and the Ocean of stars and red Sand on the other side of this stupid mars-dome thing. Umi didn't even look that surprised, so i guess she expected it.

I always hated colony life.

"Darling, I don't speak mandarin too well, you know that. But you're making this hard to believe." I paused to scratch my temple with the barrel of my pistol, finger floating just over the trigger. Umi stepped back, and had a little bit of a sweat in her tough girl poker face. Umi makes a great mom because of that poker face. Her kids can't ever get a read on her, and to be honest, I'm struggling with it too. At least now she had her gun pointed at me properly. I was a threat, suddenly. "I just can't understand your plot, here. You don't cut my brakes, ram my car, take my Glitter and throw it all in the fire. I invented fire. I put that fire out for you. Every night i sang that song, I danced those steps. Each Night I kept the fire down for you."

Umi was silent for a moment while i brought my gun back to face her, generally speaking. At this point she'd need a sixty hard head start to avoid the debris.. and this little patio was only big enough for a bed and a camera to point at it, so we didn't have much choice but to talk it out. "Then I'll Say it in french, dumbass."

Umi didn't like talking to me in my language, she always said it made her feel stupid. I She spoke okay, I could understand her just fine after all these years. "She is gone, Leaf. Stop the game. No more bombs, no more guns. You're bleeding me dry, and once I'm off the table you're going to start hearing choir bells and a burning piano. There are bigger issues at play here, and Andrea is good as dead, too. Close the book. Stop." When you work for these assholes, you really learn to speak one way, and talk another. There were a dozen ways I could interpret her weird stresses, and dumb accent. None of the obvious ones were new to me. I did not ask her for shit I already knew, though. I wanted to hear her admit that she tried to glass me and my date. I wanted to know where the girl was taken. The only reason her captors would still be alive is that she was too injured to fight back. "I know it hurts, but i respect your ability to really 'dumb it down' for me. Maybe they are dead. I know you can't let me go, not after all this. If i stop now, if I close this book... How do you plan on getting me out of it? Kill me? That's not very shrewd."

Umi would have rolled her eyes at me, if it weren't for the guns and explosives involved. She groaned and shifted her shoulders. Her stone like position on the balcony was a little more sloppy. I finally got her angry at me. "Pull your head out of your ass king, we are both dancing tonight because you have the trigger, and I need you to cool down before we all go through a hole in the glass. This is not you. You don't work like this. Innocent people die if you don't stop this" Umi was people-people. She enjoyed the old worlds idea that business on the streets doesn't mix drinks with the civilians. But unfortunately, this dome killed its last civilian. Admitedly, i was tired of the systema, and the drugs, and the turf war. We had to make dirty deals for fucking water pumps to get fixed some times. These people were idiots, and swimming around a sinking ship like rats in oily water. "INNOCENT isn't really what we like to do here on mars! S'long as syndicat is operational, as long as you have a job, every one in this god damn dome is dirty." I was a little pissed off, and the heat in my voice could have caused steam from the dew on my cheeks. I was crying when she found me, and haven't had good time to stop and finish that cry.. hard to choke that shit back for 20 minutes straight. Umi let me catch my breath, really let me cook on that ideal of innocent civilians for a moment - then she stuck her nose in my fucking business again.

"What about Valeriya? -- I was livid. Beside myself. I interupted her, and the conversation devolved from here. "What ABOUT IRA!" I screamed, hot spit flicking through my teeth and down my lips. I heaved each breath through my nose like a bottle rocket. Both hands folded around my gun to meet her eyes with the barrel. Slowly she breathed, and she let me cook off. She opened her mouth to speak again as I dropped a long sigh of grief. "Think, Leaf, -- What about The kids? I've been working for years to de-escelate" Umi used that saccharine tone to speak through my anger, but I was a hot iron in the ashes of a dead blacksmith. Just waiting to be put in the water, so i interrupted her repeatedly. "Fucking joke, Umi? don't fucking joke!" i was loud, Black-out mad, and still huffing my breath. Umi raised her voice to get over my emotional bagge. " DE-ESCALATE this shit, bring it off the streets. We work at the arcade now, you know that! You made that with me! Its working, Leaf, just slow down and think." She preached to me about this shit constantly. She felt like some kind of saintly mother-sister-thing. The proud body of nourishing justice just waiting to see the end of the violence to tell the people that it was her idea the whole time. Umi wanted to be the last boss standing at the end of the seven year war, when all hell breaks loose and corporate gets involved. "You're JUST playing the same shit, there is no progress here. We're not disarming the gang war. We are the gang wars. The entire club is just a gangwar. How many tables, bullet holes, how many wom-" Umi tried to interrupt me. It didn't go well. "Too many, too many, i know. I know. Just" "YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT, UMI. WHERE IS SHE?" I took four steps forward and put her gun over my heart, and exposed the wires under my dress shirt that lead to the heartbeat signal. The bomb was wired back to my life and her life was wired to my death. The commotion stirred my cuff-links enough to expose my watch - a digital reminder of the death trigger. She screamed at me, "LET HER GO! I ALREADY FIXED THIS THREE YEARS AGO. I TOLD YOU TO TAKE A VACATION." the saftey on her 45 dropped and her hand was cool, steady. She was ready to let her kids live if it meant raining glass all over the city below. I didn't buy her bluff, but i let her take the gun from my chest to my head. My hands were resting low now. "Bullshit... I muttered, and ripped the cables out of my arm. "leaf, no, no no." The whole harness of wires came with it. The signal flatlined, my smart watch said so at least. I looked at her beautiful eyes and used my singing voice. "Lets take a nice cold walk."

Nothing happened, of course. Not to us. Not immediately.

".. You were bluffing.." two miles away, the dome's rain system went off. The emergency sirens started blaring. It was loud, the sky shook. I took one of the pipes from my vest, and unscrewed the cap, to take a sip of the clean water inside. "No, I just always loved the rain. I like to think Ira enjoyed the rain, and shitty coffee, too. You capsule lovers always think i'm going after the glass. You worry so much about being sucked into space or getting stuck in the sand, that you never worry about the water." Umi looked up, but the falling rain burned her eyes a little. Unusual for martian simulations of rain. The thunder wasn't real either but i thought it was a nice touch. "There is no redemption here, Umi. It is all Pear Shaped now.. Coporate will be around to fix this shit soon. Go hug your kids."

Umi was rubbing the shit out of her eyes, and I gave her my old sunglasses from my coat pocket. My hat covered my eyes, so I picked that off the ground and put my coat back on. I handed her the entire dome on a silver tray. All she has to do is survive the fall. Once coprorate kick the doors in at the star-port, this whole mafia-mob-triad bullshit love game will wither in the sun. Theres no one on earth that would think a dome with dirty water could turn a profit. Umi shot me in the arm, and i was lucky she wasn't aiming for anything good. She took one of my water cans and walked off.

"You're welcome, and go to hell. You're an evil woman, Leaf.."

[dizzy-and-friends]

About the author:

Shitpost queen.

[dizzy-and-friends]

Armina Dalmar Ghedi: Night Raid

Beautiful Armina, she is the one who asked me to silence the night watch.

I cross yards at a time, gleeful as I am bounding. Full clear, she demanded - Not a soul standing in the estate.  I stalked even the shadows themselves, though I only had until full moon’s midnight to complete my order. The guards who patrol these walls are few, and I am a studied archer. I miss the way Aadila used to congratulate me on my work, but the young master is so estranged from zirs delightful sister.The Ghedi family is complicated, and relationships are muddied by political issues. Shadows swallow the corpses as they fall, a silver glint is the only mark that is left Something of a token, the magic cannot consume the silver, but it is boiled to a lump like some kind of forge slag.. I return to the rooftops and my heart shreds my voice through anxiety. She is so beautiful, but keeping her distance from the estate. Her enemies are clever, and no so clever as this duke. The last patrol is removed by my final arrow, the shadow explodes from the glass charm at the broad tip, and, though he screams, i cannot hear him. The other he was courting, a fellow guard, stout and wide as a handsome hammer, is easily doomed from proximity. I turned to her, all the lovely gifts she gave me have been dispatched to the guards, and i raise my bow with a candle to alert Armina that I have completed the route. She is a fire-branded beauty, even as she collects the folds of her hood to hide her face. Several others approached with her, though surely one is rival for her heart, I expect I am soon her favorite acolyte. While we are gathered together, the call to arms for the second phase is made. our teams are set. Armina stared into my eyes before she spoke: “When you find the rooftop weakened, exploit that and take us through the great manor. I trust you won’t lead me to harm, but my preparations are complete. All here play a roll. This strike will announce my distaste for the Duke’s poor judgement.” Of course, Armina’s eyes are hidden behind her veil, but the auburn lips of rapturous beauty, glistening in the candle-light, entice the very essence of each dying ember of justice left in this world. When she spoke to us, my heart held each breath like a bouquet on my wedding day. This obsession often drives me to wish i had the willpower to fully embrace the fairer side of my genes.. Armina leads us through each hall, and we burst through each door until we have become guests in the ball room. Almost none of the service is awake so late at night, and those that stir, Armina’s blades rush from her side and treat the interloper to a silent, peaceful embrace. Though i know not if they die in this process, i know there is no blood. Armina is armed, but she does not raise her hands to combat. It is beneath her. She is of higher purpose, and greater feats. In the ball room she brandishes her sword, a silver saber to rival her sibling’s rapier. She begins her ritual, writing in black and red dust upon the floor in a spiral, before setting it blazed with some solution. Like a mystic legend, the trail of dust consumed the floor and spat such smoke that we all though surely she was endangered, but when the short flames settled, and the spiral was cut into the dance floor, Armina gestured to me. Finally was my part to play, certainly a pivot in my career among these radicals.  Armina, in such grace and swift motion, drew her blade across my chest, and I fell to the warm embers of the floor. She removed the pendant and my eyes were so .. dark now. I could feel pain, finally. Armina’s magic spells bound to my mind, drew back like great tendrils of a deadly vine. Her vile works enraptured me, and i followed every word to the final breath until this moment. “Do not fret, child.” Armina whispered to me, her voice as gentle and soft as ever, but my ears now suffer as she speaks, my captor, my warden of a prison within my mind. I suffer here because of the witchery of a vile corruptor. I tried to speak, but my tongue flapped not at all, and a blank nub ground against my teeth, barely i was able to even utter a curse upon her. Pitiful as it would be, and without affect upon the fated witch of the Ghedi family. Armina put a finger to my lips, and i could not bite her because my teeth were so far gone. Now seemingly removed, but when? She stood over me, and quickly drove a sword to my chest.

That is what came of me, as i lay here now. Nothing but anger and deceit - the embers below me will have me by the morrow, and she will leave me. My blood is so corrupted by her ways that it faintly sizzled into glittering dust around me, following the spiral along the floor. they left me, and my hands are changing. My blood is stiffening. I have lost my perspective and now i am looking out from within a glass bottle inside a writhing corpse. Does she even know my name? Armina Dalmar Ghedi, a banshee like no other, enchantress of the northern seas and sister to a blood starved lunatic. Why would anyone trust her, if not for the jewel of her love? A love so deep that it’s wrath still shivers my soul from within this prison that will no doubt haunt my resting-place long after her departure into the guiltless night.

[dizzy-and-friends]

What a weird day to log back in.

[dizzy-and-friends]

On the topic of my trilogy, i just really wanted to share these reviews of the advanced copies i got back recent.

Responses to the work so far.

CataruToday at 10:42 PM

also dafuq is a hellion

because at first I thought hellion meant darkest dungeon, but then I see the rest of that post and...wat

Bismarck-Today at 1:55 AM

@RandomSpark I read the thing

I find it simultaneously horrifying and really interesting! It's a very interesting slice of a very strange and alien world

I think it's well written, but there are a few points that could use a look perhaps

Most of it would just be things a sober second look would change, imo, like leaving it for a night and coming back to read over it again

I find it's just inevitable with writing, but that may just be the fact that I almost always write very late at night when I'm tired lol

Also, I'll add that the brief interlude with the French Noblewoman is very Lovecraftian in feel!

And I mean that in a positive way, I don't mean to offend with a comparison, I just found it intriguing

A nice aside that builds more on the world and breaks up the existing narrative in a way that feels good

Glad to help!

Selaphine-Rose:

I liked it. Whether or not it's my "thing" remains to be seen, but this sort of...uhhhh...what's the word

It's so mechanically oriented, yet the concepts it refers to are so bizarre in the circumstance??? Like, the differences of meat and flesh as currency and also a functional object, juxtaposed against the reader's understanding that these are also parts of a human body?

It reminds me a lot of Inferno, which I'd rather fitting given what it is? But it's not just the location.

Forgive me for misremembering the details; take this as more of a made up example than as something directly from the book, but like

One of the punishments was something like

"The sinners struggle to stay above surface in a river of boiling blood, while centaurs shoot them with arrows if they try to climb out"

And it's just such a specific, mechanical way to describe it. The Italian brand of Catholicism at the time was basically like "no no, don't feel pity for anybody here, they deserve it, BUT this is all really bad so also be scared of it and repent!" So in spite of how specific all the horrible punishments are laid out to be, there's this almost unintentional lack of empathy?  Or more like...the idea of sympathy for the damned is a totally bizzare, alien thing in the first place?

Bismarck-Today at 2:49 AM

That's a real interesting point

Selphin Rose-Today at 2:49 AM

And you nail that

The succubus is like "yea bro down here we rip off chunks of sinners from the Sin Trees™ and use them for currency and other things! So, gimme babies now or?"

And meanwhile there's this fucking tree covered in mutilated, writhing people??? Right? Did I misread that?

Yeah, fucking

It's a tree covered in corpses, tied to it by their own flaming sinew????

But it's almost like a video game? Where  the visuals are only really meant to exist as flavor for the mechanics, and only carry their implicit meanings to the reader.

It doesn't tell you to feel bad for the Damned. It doesn't tell you to be disgusted by the economy, or the use of the Damned's bodies for external purposes. It doesn't tell you anything. Your response is your own, and given the very mechanical, but also normalized, tone of the writing? You're probably going to feel more empathy for the "sick or injured hellions" than the Damned. And if you don't, that's okay too. Your reaction to the piece doesn't change what it is.

So yeah, like, I think it's really fitting tbh.

[dizzy-and-friends]

Kaori “Xenon” Yaguri: Desert

“Hello. This is Kaori Yaguri, on board the survivor-shuttle ‘Xenon 001’ I have no engine power, and the host ship was destroyed in a collision. Half of my shuttle is inaccessible due to vacuum. Mayday, Mayday.”  The short band star-wave® radio hissed back at me. Just like it always did. The ambient garbage waves of the stars caused it to lap and sway like the shores of California.  “In other news, it’s my 24th birthday - and Xenon’s third. Xenon had a growing pain today, the circuitry on my surveyor panel fused during a solar flare. I was able to sheild my self in the main cabin using the old space suit. Its going to be out of air soon, i’m down to my last six canisters. Seven had a leak, turns out.”

This was the best way to maintain my sanity - and to keep the radio waves alive with my signal. If a ship would get close enough, they’d receive my emergency shortwave broadcast. An alert would pop up on their sensors and they could tune in if they wanted to. … You’re supposed to do it any way, but distress beacons are so good these days that is not usually a problem. 

“I was able to scavenge some wires and other stuff out of the main cabin. and performed our weekly check on the food preserve. We fixed the surveyor’s panel, and i was able to apply rotation to the ship using a piece of tape and slice of ham – had to make the screen think i was holding the dish-alignment button down for three days. This rotation will keep Xenon from losing power to her own shadow over solar arrays. The colony of spiders i had with me have died, the last one starved - i could no longer support it, and the gnat farm had a crack in it after i knocked it over, so they are all eaten. ”

Every morning i wake up, turn on the shortband, talk to .. no one.  then leave the short band on for as long as i have the power to do so, letting the galaxy listen in on my private conversations. I once watched a ship sail right past us because i didn’t have the short band on long enough for them to find me. I didn’t even know they were there till the sun shined on their aft. “I’ve finished programming my first game, Shattered Ship, the art looks a little stupid but for a two dimensional game, its pretty fun. I’ve had a lot of time to work on the random event generator, and the crew finally stopped killing each-other every time there is a torpedo fire. I’ve moved on to finish working on that adventure game i started last year, about the desert planet. I dunno, seems ambitious. We’ll see.”

Xenon is all I have left now, she is my sister and she is sick. Her power coils won’t last another two years, they’re 2 years past warranty. Her antennae is gone, broke up in a low-orbit pass through mar’s atmosphere. We’re scheduled to pass by again this year, If we’re too low – Well i’ll probably die unless Xenon’s parachutes still work. If we’re too high, I’ll be flung into solar orbit with the euro care systems, where I’m most likely to be found in another year. ”All things considered, Xenon is really quite happy today. Her batteries are pretty much full, the solar array is only down to 80% maximum efficiency which is great, considering how hard it is to sleep with the blast-panels open at night. means I won’t get locked inside the crew quarters again this week. But out heat waste is minimal and we’ve got plenty of spare parts now that i got the door controls to the cabin working again.” If the mars colonists have their defense radar pointing at me when i pass through, they’ll know its a rogue shuttle, might even notice the distress signature… But i’m from earth so they’ll probably just let me drift another three years till i show up again.

“I read the manual, last night, the service manual - Xeonon’s diary. She says these emergency signals are saved on a data storage somewhere in the ship, as part of the black box. I don’t know how much storage there is, or how much these take up - but the idea that some pooor soul is going to listen to me drone on for three years is terrifying. If there is enough of this material to turn into a book, and then sell it - leave some money for my daughter, if i die. In about six more hours I’ll pass by Kathy-sixsix again, the signal buoy, marking our third year in this eccentric orbit. I’ll be leaving another message for Kathy, the radio operator for this area - maybe she’ll get it, i don’t know. It took forever to build the second net, I don’t know what I’ll do if I miss again..” I stayed up all night two days ago to make sure i would be awake to see Kathy-Sixsix on the surveyor radar - it gives me a better idea of when I’ll have to get out into the space walk with the net. Kathy-SixSix is part of a network of surveyor buoys, with radio dishes set to record, and analyze radio data from other solar systems. It still picks up 16 year old news from the Proxima Colonists. Surely my short band.. and.. annual vandalism are enough to get some ones attention? “Kathy-SixSix this is Kaiori Yaguri, on board the survivor-shuttle ‘Xenon-001′. We’re on course to attempt another netting of your buoy. I have the net’s anchor welded with the backbone of the ship now. One of use is going to be very unhappy in a few hours. I’ve already prepared a Message in a Bottle for you to collect assuming the magnets do- But then, the Buoy responded. “Shuttle Xenon, this is buoy six six. If you’re hearing this, the buoy has detected your radio signature and is responding automatically. This message is two hours long, you need to hail the buoy. Any way you can, I’m not allowed to be on a shift longer than twenty four hours. I’ll have my friend listen for you, If i’m not here. ” It was a very plucky, childishly feminine voice. Reminded me of a flight cadet freshman. I was so happy to hear another voice, another person. It wasn’t on a song, or a radio-advertisment. It was a one-way-broadband audio superhighway into my heart. She knew my shuttle by name!

“The surveyor’s guild is ready to pardon all damages to the buoy, and we have located your daughter, Artemis. Acting Captain Yaguri, we have secured several hooks to the outer-hull of the buoy on break away welds. There will also be a local unpaid intern assigned to Kathy-sixsix every fourth hour for two hours. If you agree to the terms of a contract, the surveyor’s guild would like to do a series of interviews on your journey….” The message was official, and long. But i could hear her, Kathy, the buoy operator.  I had listened to my own voice for so long, and Xenon wasn’t equipped to talk. Kathy sounded gorgeous, and also a little sad. “Kaori, this is Kathy. We’ve been picking up your radio logs for the last three years, and I’m sorry. For everything. It is my job to listen for voices like yours. Once we had your signal code on record I was able to keep track of your transmissions. I’ve been listening to your stories about your friend.. I’m at the part where she died. I guess now i know how the story ends, but. I’m so sorry. I .. wasn’t listening to the emergency signals, never even checked them. No one ever flies out here without an escort, there is too much debris. Your ship’s fabricators are already willing to make a settlement with you, since your engines failed. And.. I’ve been letting your daughter listen to every signal we decode. You’re quite the hero back on earth, it turns out. No ones been able to find you, even the teams on mars let us know if they see any thing weird on radar. The fabricators even put out a finder’s fee, like you’re a lost dog or something. Shuttle Xenon, this is buoy six six. If you’re hearing this, the buoy has detected your radio signature and is responding automatically. this message is two hours long, you need to hail the buoy. Any way you can, I’m not allowed to be on a shift longer than twenty four hours. I’ll have my friend listen for you, If i’m not here.” “Kathy-Sixsix, this is Kaiori aboard the survivor shuttle ‘Xenon’. I have your message loud and clear, I’m six hours from the mark, and I have no ships on my radar. Please, someone respond. If i have to agree to some fucking contract, I agree, sign me up, what ever just 

GET ME HOME.

Then i waited.

“Shuttle Xenon, this is bouy six six. If you’re hearing this, the bouy has detected your radio signature and is responding automatically. this message is two hours long, you need to hail the bouy. Any way you can, I’m not allowed to be on a shift longer than twenty four hours. I’ll have my friend listen for you, If i’m not here. Your daughter has been doing better in school, the Surveyor’s Guild has put her in a junior academy. Her father had to ask the reporters to stop harassing her so much. He was accused of profiting off your situation a few months ago, and some one dedicated a song to you at the music awards. It.. was a cover of Major Tom.. I’m sorry. No one asked for this. The new flight marshal was instated a few days ago, and wants to put no fly zone for rookie pilots in the debris cloud , to ensure no one ever has to be stuck out there ever again. You have to have a B level rating or higher to fly non-commercial. I don’t know if that’ll help. Seems weird to put a no-fly-zone somewhere where people are more likely to be stranded or worse. Don’t smugglers hide in NFZ?”

I watched the radar until it was nearly time to do the space walk. two hours until mark, and i had to get ready to deploy the net. But first i wanted to hail the buoy. The radar was still empty.

“Kathy-SixSix, Xenon here, when the Guild assigned Unpaid Interns to watch for my passing, did they check the pilot’s flight rating? 

Am I currently in a no fly zone?

I have to get ready soon. I’ve got a better net and a better anchor this time. I’ll be able to tow, or destroy the buoy. In either case, something will happen and I’ll have more scrap material to build an antennae out of. Or the spine of the shuttle will collapse and I’ll be dead, or clinging to the buoy. I’ve got a tool-bag i can fit all the spare air canisters in…. jesus christ please respond. Kathy, please. Give me a better option.”

I waited, tears in my eyes as I stared into the bandwidth monitors, waiting for the static signals to change. This was all I had left.

“Shuttle Xenon, this is buoy six six. If you’re hearing this, the buoy has detected your radio signature and is responding automatically. this message is two hours long, you need to hail the buoy. Any way you can, I’m not allowed to be on a shift longer than twenty four hours. I’ll have my friend listen for you, If i’m not here.  It seems like people, rookie pilots mostly, have taken to scratching their name and their rating in Buoy sixsix’s paint using their repair tools. There were six or seven names when the trend started, I counted seventy last time i went out to repair it. Maybe one of these enthusiasts will come out and try to add their name to the buoy. One way to survive would be to anchor onto the buoy some how. Your relative speed is quite high, so you’d need to slow down. I’ve added some commercial air tanks to the repair storage on the buoy. the keys are magnetized to the underside of the buoy’s new collision-safety lantern, opposite of the ion drive. I’ve been talking to your daughter about things that might help keep you company.  I had to go, it was time. I needed an antennae, and the buoy had several just flying about last time i left. I managed to knock several loose.  Maybe they magnetized to the buoy or stabilized near the buoy in some kind of Dzhanibekov spin.  I’m probably not lucky enough for that.  Out here on the magnetic surfaces, watching the buoy slowly get closer to me and Xenon, i could not see anything other than the buoy. No ships, no debris. Just a floating hunk of spare parts. I had 30 minutes to set out the net, one hour to stabilize it and another thirty to get safely inside the ship before i created another debris cloud. There wasn’t any A-ARCS left in my suit, i burned that a long time ago just trying to slow the shuttle down, so i couldn’t jump ship and transfer to the buoy itself. Once the net was ready to catch the buoy, I was on my way back inside. I drifted through the rear cabin’s hull breach, used the fixtures to navigate inside and was lucky enough to have an emergency airlock between every major substation on the shuttle.  Just slip out of the suit, disconnect the canisters and then strap my self into the surveyor’s console. “Shuttle Xenon, this is buoy six six. If you’re hearing this, the buoy has detected your radio signature and is responding automatically. this message is two hours long, you need to hail the buoy. Any way you can, I’m not allowed to be on a shift longer than twenty four hours. My co-workers no long wish to take additional shifts to fill that time. It was really hard to get people on board with your net idea. No one wanted to rebuild a buoy, but now that you’re such a celebrity, the cost of our public image seemed rather high. There are these videos on the web, about how to get you safe. It started with a simple mag-tow and RCS burn.. the whole thing devolved into more complicated plans over time. You could, for example, tie together sixteen thousand socks, and create an elastic brake that you lasso around one of the hooks we welded onto the buoy. The buoy would tear the socks and you’d slow down just enough to.. well, collide with mars but we’d know where you were going. Oh that reminds me, don’t dissemble the parachute systems for any reason. A lot of junior academy simulations are showing how easily you could enter mars atmosphere this coming year, and you’ll want those to be operational. You’ll have to set them manually to deploy when there is enough atmosphere for them to grab onto, though. The maintenance guide on board with you should provide the information on how to do that. I’ve gotta go to bed, when i record the next message I’ll read you a chapter from a book your daughter said you like. Be sure to stay tuned in for that when ever this gets added to the message loop. Its been six months since I set this message and now i am adding to this loop, it can only fit 2 hours of data..editing it is a nightmare though. sucks, right?”

[dizzy-and-friends]

All that GM had to do was put a 3 minute cast time on any object they don't want used in battle. It's just a GM being a fucking idiot. Again.

Does anyone else have to deal with your DM punishing you strictly because you beat their combat scene too easily or used a magic item too effectively?

In a game I’m playing we found a magic item that basically let me do blood bending, it was made by a necromancer and we took it as well as a few other fucked up magic items, like a hammer that shatters bones into dust on a nat 20, after we kicked his ass. The DM designed these items knowing we would find and use them and typically my gaming group rewards players for finding creative ways to use magic and solve problems.

Later we came up against this guy who was just the worst type of character, murderer, slaver, kept women as his “personal servants”, and was just in general not a person we wanted alive. We fight the guy and we aren’t doing great so I use the item and I asked to just straight up rip the blood out of his body and it does a lot of damage, this basically changes the direction of the fight.

After we kill the guy, our DM is clearly annoyed because I got two good hits on him with the item. He tells me that me using the item in this way was an evil act because it was so merciless and I had to make a roll for my alignment. I called bullshit because we were there to kill him and none of us were going to spare him regardless. He tried to argue some shit that him being a bad person doesn’t mean I get to do bad things to him.

Ultimately I asked why the fuck he gave us the blood bending item if he didn’t want us to use it in the most effective way possible. He tried to spin some philosophical bullshit about self restraint but he was clearly just mad that we bested his boss fight when he wanted us to flee or for the boss to get away.

He wouldn’t let the alignment thing go, so no my lawful neutral monk is lawful evil for no reason and I’m plotting how to further fuck over his campaign. I’m gonna start with the den of thieves he’s put in our city and see how far he pushes me after that. I will also be using the magic item much more often because obviously I’m evil now so it shouldn’t bother my character to do this now all the time.

[dizzy-and-friends]

Words to replace said, except this actually helps

I got pretty fed up with looking for words to replace said because they weren’t sorted in a way I could easily use/find them for the right time. So I did some myself.

IN RESPONSE TO Acknowledged Answered Protested

INPUT/JOIN CONVERSATION/ASK Added Implored Inquired Insisted Proposed Queried Questioned Recommended Testified

GUILTY/RELUCTANCE/SORRY Admitted Apologized Conceded Confessed Professed

FOR SOMEONE ELSE Advised Criticized Suggested

JUST CHECKING Affirmed Agreed Alleged Confirmed

LOUD Announced Chanted Crowed

LEWD/CUTE/SECRET SPY FEEL Appealed Disclosed Moaned

ANGRY FUCK OFF MATE WANNA FIGHT Argued Barked Challenged Cursed Fumed Growled Hissed Roared Swore

SMARTASS Articulated Asserted Assured Avowed Claimed Commanded Cross-examined Demanded Digressed Directed Foretold Instructed Interrupted Predicted Proclaimed Quoted Theorized

ASSHOLE Bellowed Boasted Bragged

NERVOUS TRAINWRECK Babbled Bawled Mumbled Sputtered Stammered Stuttered

SUAVE MOTHERFUCKER Bargained Divulged Disclosed Exhorted

FIRST OFF Began

LASTLY Concluded Concurred

WEAK PUSY Begged Blurted Complained Cried Faltered Fretted

HAPPY/LOL Cajoled Exclaimed Gushed Jested Joked Laughed

WEIRDLY HAPPY/EXCITED Extolled Jabbered Raved

BRUH, CHILL Cautioned Warned

ACTUALLY, YOU’RE WRONG Chided Contended Corrected Countered Debated Elaborated Objected Ranted Retorted

CHILL SAVAGE Commented Continued Observed Surmised

LISTEN BUDDY Enunciated Explained Elaborated Hinted Implied Lectured Reiterated Recited Reminded Stressed

BRUH I NEED U AND U NEED ME Confided Offered Urged

FINE Consented Decided

TOO EMO FULL OF EMOTIONS Croaked Lamented Pledged Sobbed Sympathized Wailed Whimpered

JUST SAYING Declared Decreed Mentioned Noted Pointed out Postulated Speculated Stated Told Vouched

WASN’T ME Denied Lied

EVIL SMARTASS Dictated Equivocated Ordered Reprimanded Threatened

BORED Droned Sighed

SHHHH IT’S QUIET TIME Echoed Mumbled Murmured Muttered Uttered Whispered

DRAMA QUEEN Exaggerated Panted Pleaded Prayed Preached

OH SHIT Gasped Marveled Screamed Screeched Shouted Shrieked Yelped Yelled

ANNOYED Grumbled Grunted Jeered Quipped Scolded Snapped Snarled Sneered

ANNOYING Nagged

I DON’T REALLY CARE BUT WHATEVER Guessed Ventured

I’M DRUNK OR JUST BEING WEIRDLY EXPRESSIVE FOR A POINT/SARCASM Hooted Howled Yowled

I WONDER Pondered Voiced Wondered

OH, YEAH, WHOOPS Recalled Recited Remembered

SURPRISE BITCH Revealed

IT SEEMS FAKE BUT OKAY/HA ACTUALLY FUNNY BUT I DON’T WANT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD Scoffed Snickered Snorted

BITCHY Tattled Taunted Teased

[dizzy-and-friends]

I did another stupid thing

[dizzy-and-friends]

[dizzy-and-friends]

While im thinking about it, dont hesitate to make new things. But make them in a way that they can all feed eachother.

As a writer of a 16-character-cluster blog, i know its hard to keep all your characters in the same universe or fandom whatever, but try to make sure each character has something to offer yoy that you that you as a writer can transplant into several other settings.

So to help experiments along, write a narrow character that has a damn good set of rules they play by and just put them in 4 different settings as if they never left home.

Feel free to follower my rp tips blog! Submit a tip too!

[dizzy-and-friends]

What's really important to get into that top tier writing pantheon is to

Read.

Other.

Shit.

Read bad fiction. Read good fiction.

Read books on your favorite rp settings.

Read articles.

Absorb good and bad writing, and understand what makes those things unique and also good or bad.

Take what you learn and use it to write your own style of your favorite elements.

@dizzy-spark

@randomspark

Feel free to follower my rp tips blog! Submit a tip too!

[dizzy-and-friends]

Alice: yes, one funeral. I threw acid on the pyre.

Fiona: I've only been to my great grandmothers funeral. Everyone was way more sad than i was i felt guilty. Haven't been to a wedding though no one takes me with them.

Chase: im always crashing weddings. You would be amazed how many templar bring artifacts as wedding gifts.

Michelle: I try not to go to those things. Too many cameras amd crying people.

Xenon: I wasn't invited to my father's second wedding. My daughter was. Asshole, heh.

Leaf: ... Dont ask me that.

Aadila: I've never been to a wedding before. I've been to funerals, not very exciting.

Amina: You're a liar you went to my wedding.

Kairah: We don't marry the weak, but i have been to four weddings and 74 funerals.

Fio: Kairah didnt want to go to the weddings. I may have convinced her.

Has your character ever been kicked out of a funeral or wedding?

[dizzy-and-friends]

Chase, to Alice, in London during the industrial revolution.

"Bloody hell, this weather sure makes home feel like a holiday."

Fiona to Alice, 2020.

"Please stop watching me masturbate."

Michelle to Xenon, high orbit.

"Hey look its a part of your old ship, wait no. No thats just a fuel rat."

Aadilla to literally anyone.

"My favorite time to visit the cliffs is during the fall."

Anyone speaking to Leaf: wow youve got a real fire for music!

Is there a joke, or type of joke, that your character will always laugh at, regardless of their current mood or situation?