definingmywoman

[definingmywoman]

Cheat codes #1

Remove the idea that your value comes from your looks, your achievements, the clothes you wear, the car you drive, the Van Clef necklace. If you can remove all of those external factors, and look in the mirror and realise that you stripped down to your core is worthy, you without the mask is enough, from this place you will have a confidence that allows you to thrive in this world that leeches on women's insecurities. 

Root yourself in spirituality. Because ultimately life is better with God than without. Knowing there is a love, protection and care that comes from this relationship and acknowledging and strengthening this bond is how you remain grounded in a world that can so easily have you lost in the darkness, when there is so much light waiting for you to feel. God is waiting for you. 

Daily exercise. Your body is your temple, treat it as such. The movement / stretches / cardio and weights in light moderation allow a layer of protection to your health and wellbeing. You feel energised, your energy is moving through your veins. It’s an act of self love and care that doesn’t require a fancy gym membership. Just commitment of 30 mins per day. 

Prioritise your gut health. Your gut is your second brain, it’s communicating with you always. Start listening, start noticing what foods it needs, what foods affect your energy levels, if carbs are making you sleepy, re-assess, if the coffee is giving you the jitters, reassess. Stop ignoring what your gut is telling you, notice your bowel movements. Keep getting the shits? Take fucking note. Read books, get tested, learn about your gut microbiome. Having excellent gut health is how you thrive in this life, unfortunately the western diet creates quite the opposite and so its on you to rise above the status quo.

[definingmywoman]

Backslid 💔

Whenever I stumble into sin, it feels like I've let God down and I spiral into more mistakes. It's as if God already sees me as a failure, so why bother trying? I bury myself in negative, sometimes true, thoughts, but I don't think that's God's voice.

I've backslid, I've sinned, and I've tumbled into more sin. But maybe backsliding is just part of the process. It shows us where we're weak and what we need to bring to God. Just some thoughts. - El

#faith #spirituality #struggle #backsliding #forgiveness #belief #introspection

[definingmywoman]

I spent, at a minimum, at least $500-$1,000 a month exclusively on my self improvement. Here is most of what I spend on, in no particular order:

Education (classes, books, courses, certifications, college tuition, seminars, etc.)

Private lessons for languages, musical instruments, sports, etc.

Personal hobbies and passion projects

Crest whitening strips (great when in a pinch), Invisalign, professional whitening, preventative dental care, prescription whitening products from my dentist

Investments such as index funds, REITs, ETFs, CDs, individual stocks, commodities, appreciative luxury items, precious metals & gems, etc.

Organic food, vitamins, supplements, high quality healthcare, therapy, massages, prescriptions (Rx skincare, etc.)

New glasses & contacts (getting some bayonetta glasses from Burberry soon, very excited)

Sports, gym membership + sauna, hot yoga, Pilates, kickboxing, tennis, skiing, dance, etc.

Personal care such as bath/shower products, body care, haircare, skincare, makeup, brightening eye drops, perfume, etc.

Travel, events, concerts, festivals, etc.

Shopping (clothes, accessories, home goods, etc.)

Eating out at restaurants and going to coffee shops

Beauty treatments such as manicures, pedicures, waxes, brow tint & threading, salon blowouts, hair cuts & colors, facials, lash lift & tints, vitamin IVs, etc.

Regular visits to my dermatologist, dentist, psychiatrist, eye doctor, primary care physician, gynecologist, and any other specialists

Semi-regular appointments with a personal trainer, holistic nutritionist, and dietitian

I don't do all of these every single month, but most of these are recurring throughout the year and budgeted accordingly. Eventually I might add in more intense cosmetic work like medspa services, Botox, etc. If you can find a workplace with a great benefits package such as high quality healthcare, an HSA/FSA, health & wellness reimbursements for the gym, disability & life insurance, etc. I would highly recommend it and max out all the benefits you can.

[definingmywoman]

When it comes to your goals, you need to keep them private for a multitude of reasons, but one that is often overlooked is that people will place their own limiting beliefs, either about themselves or about how they perceive you, into you, thus influencing you in negative ways and keeping your from reaching as high as you know you can.

With all the online talk about being "delusional", one of the most successful ways to use delusion to your advantage is to set "unrealistic" goals, having a deep roster belief in knowing that not only can you achieve them, but that is a more of when and not if.

So don't tell people - even if they seem authoritative in the field - about your ambitious goals. Make yourself prepared, and engineer your own success by consistently taking action and manifesting that which you want through knowing that achieving it is the only option available.

[definingmywoman]

25 Laws of power for women

Conceal your goals especially the ones that are appealing. Losing weight, reinventing yourself, marrying wealthy. Instead talk about your altruistic goals - to help children, invest in education, this will chase insecure people with vile intentions.

Do not give anyone your source of power: Was is a book that changed your life? a mentor? a movie? Never give up your secret to success. If forced to do say allude to God, the universe, the a random phenomenon

Use the patriarchy to your favor; we live in a world that is, only associate with men who have power, use that power for good.

Never appear too perfect but be selectively vulnerable when needed. Only share something that you will be comfortable saying. You might say “I forget my keys all the time,” “I don’t know how to perfectly park a car “. But never disclose something you are not comfortable with just because you are afraid of being perfect.

Maintain distance in relationships. Friends are the best and you need them. But if you feel that they are becoming too dependent, see them at your own will. But also the reverse could be the case. Your friend may keep a distance, and that is the way of life. You have got to move on from it.

Develop your own style that makes you unique, beautiful, and elegant. Avoid trying to fit in the crowd of people who claim to care less about their style yet have too many opinions about other women’s style

Avoid male friends at all cost, you will have male colleagues, male bosses, male acquaintances, business partners. Keep it that way. You do not want a Truman Capote divulging your secrets to the world. Do not keep a man who does not fit your standard.

You do not have to win at every game. Pick and choose what is best for you and leave room for others. And step down if you have attained that level of success, do not let the society do it for you.

Trust people but remember that we are all humans. So trust with discretion!

Confuse people with kindness; people are not always comfortable with beautiful and intelligent women. That power is too intimidating so confuse them by being genuinely generous, curious, kind, and passionate.

Keep your strong opinions to yourself.. if you support a movement, a way of life, do so silently.

We all have dirty laundry, wash them privately, don’t expose yourself. Remain silent when people try to attack you or shame you. Whatever is not confirmed is not true. You are the only one who knows all the truth about you.

Don’t attract pity or praise: People who pity you do not help you, in fact they might think that you are weak and could mock you at their annual gossipping meeting. And if you are doing things for the sake of praise you are wasting your time.

Choose yourself all the time; never put any one’s feelings above yours.

Trust your own intuition if you feel someone is being malicious towards you, giving you back handed compliments then you should let them go

Never speak bad of another woman. Do not lazy around gossipping. Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear.

Avoid women with low self esteem they will bring you down. For some reason they do not like seeing other women who are doing better than them

Be careful who you seek validation from. Not everyone needs to be pleased. If they are in no way capable of contributing to your life in the ways you prefer, then don’t ask them for their opinions or please them.

Do not compete with other women, if you do you are only putting them on a pedestal. You are making the the standard by which you measure your progress. If you do compete, begin digging your grave.

Do not give unsolicited advice, do not share the inner workings of your mind, If your mouth is very charitable you better start journaling.

Be well-rounded and interesting. It attracts people. It also keeps you busy because you are continually improving and learning. An idle mind is an easily subdued one.

Avoid women who want to live vicariously through you; they want to know who you know, shop where you shop, befriend who you befriend, wear what you wear.

Pay attention to the source of your discomfort; get rid of them. You tell them your dreams and they remind you of all your hindrances. They ask why are you dressed so fancy as though fancy isn’t subjective. They undermine you interests and goals. They will also be quick to bring you down because they are afraid of your potential.

Do not fear power or please power. When we see powerful people we try to hard to befriend them, to be close to them but you need to be comfortable without them. Don’t push yourself in the name of friendship, do not try too hard to be in their inner circle. Your independence of mind is the most important. Instead become a powerful woman, aloof to the presence of power but aware of its importance. Be an ingenious and intelligent and use your creativity to uplift yourself. When you do so it will be hard to ignore you. Even the powerful will become an ally.

Enjoy moments of solitude. Use that time to develop yourself, improve your body, learn new skills, create with your mind, read widely, become more elegant, then launch yourself.

Remember the most powerful women are the most intelligent. Inspired by Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power. Use at your discretion.

[definingmywoman]

Things my therapist said that changed my brain chemistry

1 . Did you tell them? Then how would they know?

2. How many choices were available to you?

3. If it worked out, would you be this worked up? So is your problem the decision you made or how it turned out? Then, you're trying to control a future you can't see?

4. So they have to act a certain way to be in a relationship with you? And you decide what way that is. Ah, so like, a puppet master

5. Was it the goal? Then what's the problem?

6. Do you really want it or do you think you're supposed to?

7. If your daughter did that would this be your reaction?

8. So you're punishing yourself for surviving the only way you could?

9. You are mad you couldn't control their reaction?

10. What did you expect would be the consequence of that action?

11. Sounds to me like you're judging the actions of a teenager with the wisdom of an adult. How is that fair?

12. You were a child

13. You did the best with what you had. There was no other option.

14. You're autistic. This is what it means to be autistic. This is normal neurodivergent behavior.

15. You're literally 24. No 24 year old has that much figured out.

16. It's your phone. You're not it's human.

17. And this matters to you, because.

18. So you're a person with a personality disorder exhibiting symptoms of a personality disorder? Oh.

19. Are you looking for solutions or escaping action in a healthy way. Isn't this just glorified procrastination.

20. How much more could you have done with what you have.

21. Thats basic human behavior.

[definingmywoman]

1) RFBT

· Partnership

· Corporation

· Cooperatives

· FRIA

· E-Commerce Act

· Ease of Doing Business Act

· Intellectual Property Law

· Data Privacy Act

2) MAS

· Basic Considerations

· Cost Behavior and CVP

· Variable & Absorption

· FS Analysis

· Budgeting

· Standard Costing

· Performance Evaluation

· Pricing

· Relevant Costing

3) AFAR

· Partnership

· Corporate Liquidation

· Revenue Recognition – PFRS 15

· Long Term Construction Contract

· Franchise & Consignment Sales

· Home Office and Branch

· Business Combination

· Separate Financial Statements

4) TAX

· Introduction to Taxation

· Income Tax Fundamentals

· Final Tax & Capital Gains Tax

· Gross Income – Exclusions and Inclusions

· Special Gross Income Rules

· Deductions Principles

· Deductions from Gross Income

· Individual Income Tax

5) AT

· Practice and Regulations of the Profession

· Code of Ethics

· Fundamentals of Assurance Services

· Introduction to Auditing

· Overview of Audit Process and Pre-engagement

· Audit Planning

· Study and Evaluation of Internal Control

· Auditing in an IT Environment

· Business Processes Part 1

6) FARAP

· Review of Accounting Process, Single Entry and Correction of Errors

· Cash and Cash Equivalents, Bank Reconciliation, Proof of Cash and Audit of Cash

· Trade and Other Receivables, Notes Receivable and Audit of Receivables

· Loans Receivable, Impairment and Receivable Financing

· Inventories, Biological Assets and Audit of Inventories

· PPE - Initial and Subsequent Measurement, Borrowing Costs and Government Grants

· Wasting Assets, Intangible Assets, Impairment and Audit of PPE and Intangible Assets

· Investment in Equity Securities, Associates and Debt Securities

· Investment Properties, Other Investments and Audit of Investments

[definingmywoman]

some people fall in love with other’s flowers but not their roots

so they don’t know what to do when autumn comes round and their roots start to show

[definingmywoman]

the way coral said "I killed them all for nothing" just before whe was bitten by a snake hit so hard. because for the whole games you saw her as a villian, as a bad person. But, just like everyone in that arena, she wanted to see her family and friends again, she was just a kid that wanted to live. And her last thought was about the innocent souls she had to kill for that.

[definingmywoman]

ALL 2024.

CLAIMING IT NOW.

IT IS YOURS.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

[definingmywoman]

Date by honoring your nervous system.

This took me a long while to realize, but once I did, it changed how I see dating and chemistry. Let me explain.

When you realize that chemistry and flying sparks have zero correlation with compatibility, you've leveled up your dating mindset.

Most often those sparks and butterflies you feel, that's your subconscious picking up on familiar toxic patterns in the other person. Patterns which remind you of past experiences or even childhood trauma. Our brains are designed to see familiarity as safe, so when toxic dynamics are all you know, this can turn against you. You have to conscious rewire your brain, and be intentional and aware of how they make you feel.

Toxicity = familiar = safe = we interpret it as attraction. If they make your nervous system go haywire, we see this as chemistry and sparks flying, but it is actually alarm bells going off to signal we are not safe.

Healthy = unfamiliar = can feel unsafe and scary. We may interpret a vanilla, calm, comfortable interaction as a lack of chemistry. But there is a difference between no physical attraction, and being attracted to someone but not feeling any sparks. The latter is normal in the beginning. If your nervous system feels calm, they make you feel comfortable and at ease, that's a good sign!

So if there's any advice I would give to my younger self, it's this: date based on how he makes your nervous system feel. Does he make you feel safe, comfortable, at ease? That's the green flag to go for.

-Lumen

[definingmywoman]

I love potatoes

[definingmywoman]

“I hope you all find yourselves sleeping with someone you love, maybe not all of the time, but a lot of the time. The touch of a foot in the night is sincere. I hope you like your work, I hope there’s mystery and poetry in your life — not even poems, but patterns. I hope you can see them. Often these patterns will wake you up, and you will know that you are alive, again and again.”

— Eileen Myles, “Universal Cycle.” The Importance of Being Iceland. (via llleighsmith)

[definingmywoman]

Best foods for beauty:

•Celery juice (contains anti-inflammatory properties)

•Hot water and turmeric with lemon (anti-inflammatory properties & vitamin c promoting glowing and youthful skin)

•Salmon (prevents inflammation that leads to acne)

•Sweet potatoes (contain retinol vitamin A)

•Macadamia nuts (prevent insulin driven acne)

•Green tea (antioxidants and anti-inflammatory properties)

•Oranges (vitamin c helps prevent wrinkles and aging skin)

•Bone broth (collagen booster)

[definingmywoman]

2024 Masterclass list

I want to be more feminine, put together and sophisticated next year. I’m tired of being in my masculine. These are materialistic things I feel that once I accomplish them, I’ll feel more comfortable in my feminine energy. Intrinsically, I’ll have to work on my mindset.

1. Etiquette class / videos online

2. Being intentional with words without being aggressive. Being more soft spoken but not submissive

3. Learn how to do a blowout

4. Start wearing more pastel colours

5. Walking like a woman

6. Feminine hand gestures

[definingmywoman]

Im better I am I don’t think about you as often and I don’t get as mad when I do well not all the time I don’t want to though think about you i don’t want to see you I don’t want you to exist I don’t want to write about you anymore I’m getting better I am I don’t think about you anymore

[definingmywoman]

I think I wanted you to stay until I was ready to leave if I’m being honest I knew we wouldn’t last I saw it in your eyes when you gave up on us on me

But the signs were there I just chose to ignore them or i hoped that one day you’d wake up and choose me

I don’t have any hate in my heart just pain