deetodaohh

[deetodaohh]

[deetodaohh]

mingyu & wonwoo for w korea

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I thought I moved on. But just seeing your sister brought everything back to surface and then added to that the knowledge that you told her about us? Makes me feel like shit for not holding on and for the way I ended us. Feelings I tried so hard so repress, to forget..came rushing back. All I want is to see you again, to talk to you, to see your smile and hear your laughter. I miss you…

And I still love you.

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Right now, thoughts of dying keep plaguing my mind. While crossing the road what if a car seemingly out of nowhere came at me? What if I’m sitting in a car and there was a crash? Or what if I’m standing outside while smoking and something fell down from the building? But the worse is I’m not afraid. Its like a normal thing to think, like thinking of what to eat or drink.

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I saw this and I thought of you. 😢😢

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Is it too much to ask?

While on youtube, I stumbled on this video “How to text guys”. Curious, because well sino ba namang babaeng naghahanap ng someone ang ayaw malaman kung paano magreply sa text ng taong nagugustuhan dagdag mo pa na gwapo si Kuya, pinanuod ko para tips na din. At the end of the video, he mentioned the link where I can get his book HOW TO GET THE GUY. Its $7 wala akong pera kaya naghanap ako ng libre. And so I downloaded the what I called as “Para Mapasaakin na talaga si Tutut”.

First 15 pages or so I was, “okay akong ako to ah” kaya lang its too long naiinip ako magbasa. I’m not in my so called reading mood this days kaya tinigil ko, babalikan ko na lang pag nasa mood na ulit ako, and went back to youtube.

What I really wanted to know is how to make this person fall for me. Kasi he swore not to fall for anyone. He does not believe in love, relationship and especially marriage. Siguro nasaktan siya ng sobra noon, I dunno kasi we don’t talk “personal”. So ngayon I need to know if there’s a chance na gusto niya din ako o kahit katiting ba may something siya sakin at hindi puro charchar lang kami.

While browsing I found one of his video “Does he like me? - 7 surprising signs”. Half way through with heart racing and blood rushing to my face I exited the video and screamed “buseeeet!! Enough.” I can only take so much, its perfectly clear he doesn’t like me. Ouch! Again. And again. Tengene nemen kasi alam naman kasi hook up lang masyadong sineryoso. Ayan tuloy.

I’ve said this many times and I think I’m gonna say this many more times until I finally tire myself of broken heart and wounded pride. I need to move on. I need to find someone who will treasure me the way I should be and someone who will make me feel special that I don’t need to watch or read anything to know if he likes me or not. I will find someone whom I will be comfortable enough that I can text him silly things. I will find someone who will be loyal and honest, who will LOVE me truthfully.

For that happen, first, I should end my long term relationship with my bed. Second, I have to open myself on possibilities and to meet new people. Third, I need to believe that somewhere someone is also waiting for me. Were just both lazy. And last but not the least, I need to be happy because right now I am NOT.

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Tanga ba ako kung sasabihin kong mahal kita?

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I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE ANYMORE

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Ron: You know who's beautiful?

Hermione: *blushes* Who?

Ron: Viktor Krum.

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“You say one thing and someone’s offended, you say something else and another person is offended. People should probably just calm the fuck down.” Excerpt From: Klune, TJ. “A Destiny of Dragons (Tales From Verania Book 2).”

[deetodaohh]

How can I still love you after everything you’ve put me through?

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