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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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i finally understand it. thank you so much

That's fine, I was a little worried about that since I don't know if you're into FMA or not. I wanted to ask about your thoughts on the latest episode of Citrus's beginning. I have a better idea of it now but when I first read it I was confused on why Yuzu didn't take Mei since I'm super dense. I haven't talked to anyone else who watches the series so I wanted to reach out

Oh yes YES I actually wrote about it in the tags of the photosets when I reblogged it so I know exactly how to say it here!

I think she didn’t accept Mei’s advances for a very simple reason: because Mei wasn’t offering to do it because she wanted to. She was doing it to “repay” Yuzu.

That’s the only reason why. You can see it in Mei’s face here that she isn’t getting any pleasure out of it. She’s just feeling obligated, like it’s part of a job or something and she has to do it to repay Yuzu.

And at first I think Yuzu is just baffled and disbelieving, which is why she asks for confirmation/consent (god bless, by the way, consent is so nice).

But I think she refuses Mei because she realizes before long that this isn’t something Mei wants, but rather feels it’s something she has to do. Because it’s “what Yuzu wants to do.”

But I think right as Yuzu is leaning in, she gets and inkling that something’s off and wants to be certain. And even though this is exactly what she’s wanted, she forces herself to stop and take another look.

And she realizes Mei is just doing this without wanting to. That her heart isn’t behind it.

And I think that’s why we got the results we did.

I don’t think she just chickened out. Maybe that was a part of it, but there’s no way she would have drawn back and given Mei another glance to check if Yuzu was simply nervous about all this. If it was just nerves she would’ve leaned in and kissed her and been flustered about it and blushed a lot.

But the fact that Yuzu doesn’t get ahead of herself, the fact that she stops and pulls back and looks Mei over again to check, confirms that she knew. She knew Mei wasn’t doing this because she wanted to. She was just doing it out of obligation.

And I fully believe that’s the reason Yuzu rejected her advances. Because she knew Mei didn’t really mean the offer the way Yuzu wishes she would.

If Yuzu had accepted Mei in this moment and done whatever she was going to do with her, she would have just been using her for her body, using her as “compensation” or a repayment for helping her with her father and grandfather. Accepting Mei here when Mei didn’t truly want to do this would have dehumanized her.

Which is why I think Mei was so shocked by the denial.

Like maybe I’m wrong but I feel this is one of the most expressive things she’s ever done thus far, right? I think it’s maybe because Mei understands that. That by refusing her now, Yuzu is cherishing her a lot more than anyone else ever has. Because she’s seen through Mei’s mask and is refusing to just use her when Mei offers herself (unlike the creep fiance teacher).

Yuzu’s refusal of Mei shows how much she cares about her, because it shows that, in spite of the fact that Yuzu has wanted this so much for so long, she won’t do it if it’s going to dehumanize and hurt Mei. She won’t do it if Mei doesn’t truly want it herself. She’s willing to refuse and wait until a time when Mei will offer and truly mean it with all her heart.

Maybe I’m reading way too much into it, but I loved this scene because this is exactly what I saw from it, and I honestly think it was beautiful and profound.

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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❤️

I loved every part of Citrus anime. Even if I am more a manga person and I am a huge freak about Citrus manga (because I am soooo into it), the adaptation was nice <3 So thanks to the anime for enlightening our saturday for 12 weeks.

I wanted to do a comparison for once, because there was something that made me burst in laughters once I saw this scene xD

I kinda imagined this scene in the manga being Yuzu jumping on Mei like a lioness trapping her prey, like the supergirl she is, a super heroine, going all the way to get her girl!

And then I was like “Omg she jumped from that far Oo Yuzu is such a supergirl <3 I can’t wait to see how she will reach Mei from that distan…”

“Oh… Ok she kinda lost her track…��

“Dat fall xD Omg Yuzu you’re such a dork, love ya <3 “

This scene was EPIC (and the next part of it almost made me tear up T.T such an iconic scene)

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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Already interpreted it this way in the manga :v

LET IT BE REAL SOMEDAY!

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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Mei is too pure for this world.

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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Reblog if Hayley Kiyoko is also your Lesbian Jesus

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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open up #1

honestly speaking, my same sex attraction started when i was in elementary school. around fifth grade or sixth grade.. i can't remember it clearly. there was a girl who madly in love with me. she stayed by my side 24/7 (yeah that's a lil bit overact). one day she asked me to kiss her. but this dumb elementary student didn't know what to do. where should i kiss her? in a cheek? left cheek or right cheek? so i started to kissed her cheek and suddenly she pulled me for a kiss in a lips. yeap my first kiss was stolen by a girl in not-so-romantic way. and both of us are so dumb we keep kissing and touching another for... i don't know. we did it everyday. there was i time we made an intense made out. i think i still can felt it. elementary passed and we both choose a different way. i don't even remember how we broke up.. can i even call it broke up?

in junior high school, there's a freedom for me. a lot of my friends felt the same. they're more open about something like this. it feels like.. i'm in heaven. i hit couple of my friends. gladly they responded in a good way. but still until now i'm not even ready to have a same sex relationship. its not like people against about it. i don't really give a fuck what's in other people's head. i still don't know anything about commitment and shit. i don't want to hurt my feelings nor anyone's feeling.

senior high school feels the same. but there are a lot of pretty girls i can find in here :] sadly as stiff as i am i don't even know how to start a relationship especially with this special relationship. i told someone that i love her and being dumb as ever. but that's okay. i'm not even regret it. life is just about doing shit and so on. hopefully i can start my relationship journey in collage :]

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deer-dolphin · 7 years ago

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