deathcrushedcorpse

[deathcrushedcorpse]

I AM ANTI RADQUEER

WHY DO I HAVE TO KEEP SAYING THAT

THIS MEANS DNI IF YOU SUPPORT RADQUEERS

[deathcrushedcorpse]

Its narcissistic abuse awareness day! Remember to love and support the narcissists in you life that have been abused ❤

[deathcrushedcorpse]

since this person clearly did not read the posts i had written vvv

let me specify- once again.

the post(s) were not intended for endogenics in the slightest. it was a vent about my abuser being a raging cunt to endogenics in the same way he abuses me.

use your reading comprehension skills next time, especially since i was actively indirectly defending your community against the vile words of someone being disgusting to all of you.

i genuinely believe that this is precisely why no one who is anti endo attempts to speak up when we believe someone is treating endogenics unfairly. jesus fucking christ.

and once again- for the final time-

endogenic “systems” and their supporters, do not fucking interact.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

also before any other syscourse blogs attempt to interact with me regarding my last posts, read this. i am not a syscourse blog and i have no interest in debating you. thanks.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

anyways, on a more positive (hyperfixation) note, a video game that i have replayed the demo for over n over n over again due to the immense amount of comfort the main character brings me is getting a full release in about three days. :)

i am very happy, and i’ll likely post some of my own thoughts and theories once i’m able to purchase the full game and play through some of the endings myself !

[deathcrushedcorpse]

also, just in case he does see this (idk how he would since i hide my body’s identity on this blog and you really would have to dig to figure out who i am) and immediately jumps to conclusions like he always does,

i am strictly anti endogenic “systems” of any kind. you require trauma to have ended up with DID.

in no way am i disagreeing with this thought point, i just truly believe that using harmful- bordering upon ableist- insults gets the argument nowhere and ultimately makes anti endos look like the raging assholes endogenics make us out to be. maybe i’m crazy for thinking we shouldn’t immediately jump to insulting these people by calling them “delusional freaks” and should probably just discuss our evidence with them like adults? even if they respond immaturely or aggressively? but regardless, it isn’t a crime to just attempt to be kind once n awhile. it’s almost like if you meet them with aggression and immaturity right out the gate, they’ll likely meet your energy.

you will always receive the energy you give.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

just a reminder here that using “delusional” as an insult is not and never will be okay? lol? i can understand referring to someone as delusional if you’re trying to help or some shit, but it isn’t “reality checking” or “the truth” to solely refer to anyone who disagrees with you as “delusional freaks” or “delusional fucking lunatics”.

this is a very targeted post that the person will never see, but the fact that my abuser has moved on from referring to me as this publicly to minimize my truth when i spoke out against him, to now using this language to harm others is just. sitting very very poorly with me.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

penis

dick and nuts

[deathcrushedcorpse]

whats up with people saying euroman had a shit covered dildo?? PLEASE i cannot find anything abt that and it drives me crazy where did peiple come up with that

HELP this is the first I’m hearing about this whatsoever but this is so funny to me to know that this is a rumour that exists.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

I wrote infodumps on both Mayhem and DSBM. I figured I’d add them here. These were both written after learning from word of mouth from other metalheads and through chat forums regarding the opinions of these things. Not everything may be accurate, and that’s fine. I may also write more in the future about bands like Psychonaut 4, Lifelover, Apati, My Useless Life, Shining, Strid, etc. I’m always open to discussion on these btw, and my ask box is open if you’d prefer to remain anonymous. :)

Mayhem infodump

OKAY so Mayhem was founded in 1984 by Øystein Aarseth- more commonly known by his stage name of Euronymous- and consisted of himself on guitar, Necrobutcher on bass, Manheim on drums, and Maniac on vocals. The lineup changed a few years in when Manheim decided to leave the band and Jan Axel aka Hellhammer took his place. In 1988, Pelle Ohlin- more commonly known as Dead- joined the band. This was truly the golden age of Mayhem in my personal opinion. Dead was known for his raw talent and dedication, going as far as to huff the smell of dead crows before performing and burying his stage clothes DAYS in advance to truly embrace death and the look of being a corpse. Dead also created the look of corpse paint- and terms- we have currently, using it to further push his appearance of being a corpse. After a few years, on April 8th 1991, Dead took his life via slitting his wrists and throat before taking a gunshot to the head. In his suicide note, he goes over his personal views on his existence- or feeling of lack there of- before leaving Euronymous the lyrics to the song Life Eternal. Euronymous is who found Dead's body, and ended up posing his corpse to then photograph it. One of these photos would later be used for the bootleg live record album Dawn of the Black Hearts. Necrobutcher was disgusted by Euronymous' actions, as he had also made necklaces out of pieces of Dead's skull. Necrobutcher then left Mayhem. After this in May of 1991, Euronymous opened his record shop Helvete (Norweigan for Hell). It became the home for his group- The Black Circle- and members of said group actually lived there at different points in time. Euronymous also went on to create his label- Deathlike Silence- and signed on Mayhem (obviously), Burzum, Merciless, and Abruptum to name a few. Euronymous also invited Varg to become the bassist of Mayhem shortly after the burning of Fantoft. I already mentioned the first church burning, but on August 21st 1991, Faust of Emperor murdered a man in Lillehammer. Many believe this to have been a hate crime because the man was gay, but Faust himself has said that it was because the man made unwanted sexual advances on him. It's up to personal interpretation. The night after on August 22nd- suspected to be in celebration- Faust, Varg, and Euronymous burned down Holmenkollen Chapel in Oslo. Varg later proceeded to be retarded (shocker!) and out himself as the one responsible for the church burnings to the press in an attempt to create a panic. After being released for lack of evidence, he then left Mayhem. Years go by, and inevitably Euronymous writes a contract for Varg to sign that would transfer ownership of Burzum from Deathlike Silence back to Varg. In an absolute rage, Varg and Snorre of Thorns drove 7 and a half hours from to Euronymous' apartment on August 10th 1993. Varg's account of the night is unreliable, as he claimed he acted in self defense. It is widely believed that after Varg was told about a comment Euronymous had made about wanting to torture and kill Varg in the woods to make a snuff film, he became aggressive and paranoid. So when he went to Euronymous' apartment, he acted on that aggression. Although Varg himself claims that after signing the contract, Euronymous became erratic and attempted to stab him, there is no evidence to back this. Varg was captured 9 days later on August 19th, and was charged for the murder of Euronymous, 4 counts of arson for the church burnings, and for possession of 150kg of explosives. He was sentenced to 21 years in prison on May 16th 1994. Also in 1994, Faust was captured and sentenced to 14 years in prison for the murder of the man in Lillehammer. Varg only served 15 years in prison and was released in 2009. He attempted to return to metal, but was never accepted and is currently seen as one of the most massive clowns in metal history.

DSBM infodump.

DSBM is short for depressive suicidal black metal!!! It focuses heavily on themes of self destruction, self mutilation, suicide, anti humanity, negative emotions and energy, and emotional instability. Some notable names in DSBM are Shining (sadly), Livelover (my beloved), Xasthur, Silencer, Nocturnal Depression (also my beloved), My Useless Life, and Psychonaut 4 to name a few. The band members often genuinely live the lifestyles they write music about, often being completely isolated, heavily addicted to drugs, alcoholics, engage in violent self mutilation, and other self destructive behaviours. It is extremely common for DSBM bands to only have one member since isolation and bitterness is a huge theme of the music.

It's heavily believed that the first *true* DSBM band was Shining- which was founded in 1996 in Halmstad, Sweden after their frontman was heavily influenced by bands like Strid and albums like Hvis lsyet tar oss and Filosofem by Burzum (shit band). Shining's frontman and founder Niklas Kvarforth was *KNOWN* for being extremely aggressive and for promoting anti recovery ideals, claiming that his music should be encouraging the listener to self mutilate- or even kill themselves- or else they weren't *truly* experiencing his music. He was also known to be extremely self destructive and abusive to his bandmates, even going as far as to have ex-Mayhem vocalist Maniac carve a swastika into his forehead before enacting violence towards various band members on stage during their most infamous performance.

DSBM has grown over the years and is now commonly associated with being used for coping, allowing the listener to experience the musician's pain with them as a way of feeling less alone.

The downside to this genre is that it tends to attract bad crowds (mostly nazis and predators who wish to prey on the mentally ill), case in point being musicians like Niklas, Maniac, and even the infamous 2 guys 1 hammer killers who had a russian DSBM band by the name of Dismembered Pugachova I believe. People commonly mistake the DSBM scene and the music as an excuse and community to be hateful towards minorities because a lot of DSBM artists and black metal artists in general truly believe in satanism im the form of spreading misery, pure evil, and absolute chaos.

There are so so so so many occasions of DSBM- and black metal bands in general- participating in acts of self mutilation, animal cruelty, and other disturbing acts during their performances. Shining actually in the past has passed out razor blades at their shows, even to kids. During Shining's infamous performance with Maniac and other popular BM band members, Niklas noticed a kid in the crowd singing along to every song and at one point, pulled him up on stage and handed him a razor blade and encouraged him to cut in front of the crowd. To which the child made a small slit across his palm to appease Niklas.

DSBM and black metal- while having an extremely troubling history with band members and appearances- is truly what paved the way for metal bands that everyone loves and adores today. Hell, Dead from Mayhem is who created corpse paint as we know it today and even *coined* that term. The Black Circle in Norway- created by Euronymous of Mayhem- was one of the most influential black metal groups in the black metal scene KNOWN TO MAN. The group consisted of all members of Mayhem, all members of the band Emperor, Varg Vikernes of Burzum, and Snorre of the band Thorns. They created the elitist mindset of the black metal community in Norway, making the scene so INSANELY hard to get into if you weren't already a part of it. The scene was so exclusive and extremely aggressive towards who they deemed posers. The Black Circle has also been deemed the most Satanic group in black metal history, even having challenged the Church of Satan by saying they "only wanted peace and love" when Satanism should be about spreading "misery, evil, and pure chaos".

The first church burning in the name of black metal and Satan was carried out by Varg, Faust of Emperor, and Jorn of Immortal on June 6th 1992! They burnt down Fantoft Stave Church in Oslo, Norway. This led to a HUUUUUGE string of church burnings (there is believed to be 60+ linked to black metal) during this time. Even when Varg was arrested for the murder of Euronymous (and charged with 4 counts of arson), there were two church burnings during the time of the trial which were suspected to be fans showing their support for him. Which is fucking stupid because that fuckwit's a nazi but wtvr.

[deathcrushedcorpse]

‧˚꒰🪦꒱༘⋆ ABOUT ME.

. 𖦹˙— my name is DEAD or BUCKSHOT.

𓃦 20 years old. . . it-he prnsᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

+†+ ᥫ᭡ 11-20-21 // MARRIED & MONOGAMOUS.

🪦🐾 you can read my carrd here to skip the extended portion of this post.

𐁔 prof. DX’d w . . . [HC-]DID, social & separation anxiety, chronic depression, autism, paranoid schizophrenia, BPD, DPD, traits of NPD, + a few genuine phobias. these can and will effect how i interact with others. please keep this in mind.

⚰️🪳 . . . i am extremely reactive and unsocialized. i am extremely asocial due to trauma and mental illness, and i am not seeking out relationships of any form with anyone. if we begin to socialize, please be patient with me and understand that i may take hours- if not days- to respond. i do not allow tone tags to be used on me and i do not use tone tags without being asked. if you need them, just ask. i cannot read your mind.

⚰️🫀 . . . despite being a member of a system, i am the only one who will be posting to this blog. for this reason, i may go inactive for extremely long periods of time. if we have developed a friendship, another member of our system will inform you i have left front if needed. the system as a whole has a primary blog, and will give it out upon request.

;; 🐾🪦 BYF.

🐾⚰️ . . . this blog will be used to infodump, discuss, and reblog about my hyperfixations and special interests. these include- and are not limited to- Mayhem, Boyfriend to Death, the history of autopsies and mortuaries, human anatomy, gore, the history of snuff films and the myths behind them, DSBM as a whole, and many more. i also cosplay and may post photos from time to time. i will not place trigger warnings on individual posts, as my interests are grotesque and reading this should be your warning. i am blunt and monotonous in my tone, even through text. i do not like animals and would prefer not to be spoken to about and/or shown them.

;; 🫀🪦 DNI.

⛓️‍💥⚰️ . . . typical DNI criteria, TERF / SWERF, centrist / right leaning / right wing by any means, involved in ship discourse (i do not fucking care), ddlg / varients, MAPs / pedos / zoos (anti AND pro contact, go fuck yourselves), proana / thinspo / fatspo / etc, believe in “endogenic” systems / being a system “without trauma” (go fuck yourself) . . .

🪓⚰️ . . . while i will not be posting explicitly sexual content, i do prefer that you be 18+ in order to interact with my blog. i am a grown adult and will not censor myself for anyone’s comfort. i also do not believe that minors should have access to any form of actual gore and do not feel comfortable discussing such topics around minors . . .

🩸⚰️ . . . do not flirt with me in any way. i am happily taken by my three partners in our husband system, and we are collectively married to our husband system. we do not date outside of our husband system and have zero interest in anyone outside of our husband system. we are completely and utterly devoted to him and him only. i will get extremely aggressive if you break this boundary in any way. respect this or accept your consequences . . .