darkmossylibrary

[darkmossylibrary]

I know that I sound like an MRA when I say "If you spread hateful rhetoric about men, you will drive them away from the feminist cause and lose them as valuable allies" but also

If you spread hateful rhetoric about men, you will drive them away from the feminist cause and lose them as valuable allies.

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chillin on a Saturday night

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Diagram of my kitten who fell asleep on my lap that i drew through tears. Pleawse. I cant get up

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one of the issues with being transgender is that sometimes, when people don’t understand your identity, they ask you questions like “what are words and does anything exist, even” and it’s like well carol you should consult a philosophy textbook for that i just fucking live here.

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Activism is not cold-calling.

Activism is not cold-calling, and this is critically important to understand.

I'm seeing a lot of posts on here about 'building bridges' and 'finding community,' and then (extremely valid) response posts saying "BUT HOW??" And I'm going to explain something that can be very counter-intuitive: there is strategy involved in community.

As a longtime volunteer labour organizer, I’ve taken and taught many trainings on the strategy of talking. Something that surprises a lot of people is the very first thing you do in a union campaign. You sit down with your organizing committee, take out pen and paper, and literally map it out. You draw a physical map of the workplace: where are the entrances, exits, break rooms, supervisor offices. Essentially, ‘where is it safe to have a union conversation.’ Then you draw another physical chart of your coworkers. You sort out who is union-friendly, openly hostile to unions, or somewhere in the middle, and then you plan out very deliberately and carefully who talks to whom and in what order.

Consider: If Vocally Leftist Jane walks up to Conservative David and says "hey what do you think about unions," David is going to shut down immediately. He's not inclined to listen to Jane. But if Jane talks to Moderate Jason and brings him into the fold, then Jason is a far more effective strategic choice to talk to David, and David may actually hear him out without an instant reaction.

IMPORTANT CAVEAT: If Conservative David turns out to be Alt-Right David, and could be dangerous to follow organizers, we write him off. We are not trying to reach Alt-Right David. We are trying to reach Conservative David, who may actually be persuaded to find solidarity with other employees as fellow workers. Jason is a safe scout to find out which one he is. It does no one any good if Leftist Jane (or even Moderate Jane who is a visible minority) talks to Alt-Right David and puts herself on his radar. Not only has she done nothing to convince Alt-Right David to join a union - she's probably actively turned him against the idea - but now she's also in danger and the entire campaign is at risk. NOBODY WANTS THIS. Jane was NOT a hero for doing this. The organizing committee was foolish and enacted a terrible strategy to everyone's detriment.

Where you can make a difference is with people who will listen to you. You having a conversation with your well-meaning but clueless Centrist Democrat Auntie, and maybe gently helping her understand some things the media has been glossing over, is way more strategically useful than you marching up to MAGA Neighbour You've Met Once and trying to "build community" or "understand" them. They don't care. They're impervious, dangerous, and cruel. But maybe your beloved auntie will think about what you said, and then talk to her friend Anna who IDs as "fiscally conservative" but didn't vote because she can't bring herself to get on board with Trump. Then perhaps Anna talks to her brother Nic who has MAGA leanings but isn't all the way there yet. Proto-MAGA Nic would not have listened to you, nor would he have listened to Centrist Democrat Auntie, but he might absorb some of what his sister is saying.

This is not a cop-out or an echo chamber. This is you spending your time and energy strategically and safely. You are not a useful activist to anyone if you’re dead. Anyone who is telling you to hurl yourself directly at MAGA assholes like cannon fodder has no understanding of the strategy behind community building, and you should feel comfortable writing them off.

Last point: If you are tired, emotionally devastated, and/or in danger: take a break. This post is for people who would feel better jumping into action, not for people who are too overwhelmed to even think about it right now. You are worth so much even if you’re not actively Doing Activism, and your rest is worth more than “a break period so you can recharge and Do More Activism.” We all deserve the individual dignity of being worthy of comfort, rest & safety just on the basis of being human, outside of whatever we're doing for others' benefit. To deny ourselves that dignity is to devalue ourselves, and that’s the absolute last thing any of us should be doing right now.

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OH YEAH TRANS """""BROS"""" HAVE SO MUCH MALE PRIVILEGE

SHUT THE FUCK UP

DO YOU EVEN REALIZE THAT ONLY A SMALL PERCENTAGE OF TRANS MEN EVEN PASS. MOST OF US ARE NOT ABLE TO GET GENDER AFFIRMING CARE. LISTEN TO TRANS MEN FOR FUCKING ONCE IN YOUR LIFE BEFORE YOU SPEW THIS BILE.

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"B-b-but what if ur not actually aro!! What if u just haven't met the right person yet?? Ur still young 🥺"

Than I'll stop using the aro label. I'll realize that I was incorrect and go on with my life. No one's changed my mind yet though. I haven't met that "special someone 🥺🥺🥺🥺" "yet" so I don't care about this entirely hypothetical person.

Aphobes are stupid ngl. Realizing that this label doesn't fit me (which it will almost definitely still fit me as I get older) isn't going to be some world shattering event. I'll move on, I'll accept my mistake. Lol

I'm not ace, but this post wasn't about being aroallo so go wild, I se you aroaces and aces, y'all r cool so you can tag it as ace and aroace

Everyone in the reblogs and comments, talking about how finding the right person doesn't invalidate being aspec are right, I should've said that in the post, but this point has been made on this post by others a thousand times. It's getting a bit annoying. No hate but if it happens again I might turn of replies and if it happens again in a reblog I'm turning those off too.

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"lying is wrong" what evangelical nonsense is this???

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"the world isn't kind" ok??? Much more importantly are you?????

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uh yeah okay

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The word garbage sounds like it should mean clothing

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I loveee fantasy settings doing magical exhaustion:

burnt out pyromancers emitting steam and smoke

tired cryomancers shivering with visible foggy breath

weary necromancers looking ill and hearing voices

frazzled healers receiving the same cuts, bruises, and injuries of their patients

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i think im going to lose my fucking mind actually.

this little make believe game that yall are playing where ur all pretending that we have always been passing as cis men is honestly just really sickening to read. as if trans men have never been sexually harassed or abused because society perceives us as women. im genuinely of the opinion that u all just do not believe trans men face misogyny and thats so unbelievably fucked up and just not based in reality. its actually disgusting and vile.

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