d3adgoddess - Tumblr blog

[d3adgoddess]

I'm just a girl.

[d3adgoddess]

That's what I always will be.

a whore.

that's what I will always be. a whore that was never touched, a whore that will never have mercy.

unfaithful, untrue, unreal, unclean. a whore.

that's what I always will be.

unstoppable, unforgivable, unforgettable, unlovable. a whore.

that's what I always will be.

defeated, disgusting, devastated, dead. a whore.

that's what I always will be.

[d3adgoddess]

Kerrang! Magazine - November 21, 1998

[d3adgoddess]

What is fear?

What is fear, if not the man who raised you? What is fear, if not that weird feeling in your guts, that you are about to get caught? Even though you did nothing wrong.

Fear is when "yourself at home" and "yourself outside home" are not the same person. Well... I guess I should not call it a home, because home is where you feel safe enough to be who you really are.

What is fear, if not getting scared by footsteps down the hallway that get closer and closer, each second? It sounds like the devil got lost inside your own house, because again, why would you call it a home? If there's no shelter during storms and no hugs, during sadness?

Fear is when you hide your emotions in order to be falsely taken care of. Lying to yourself that everything is fine, or at least, it should seem like it. Because you are always fine, it doesn't matter what happens. You have got to be fine.

What is fear, if not not praying every single night to wake up dead? Or just, to not wake up at all. Not in this house. Not in this place.

Fear is knowing that hell would be less painful than looking into fear's eyes. Hell would be like a warm hug and a lovely wet kiss after a cold rainy day.

That's what fear is.