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WAAAGH WHERE THE FUCK DID MY MOTIVATION GO
#I WAS DOING SO GOOD!!!#now I don’t feel like doing anything…#can’t force it I know that won’t work#I also have a shit Ton of drawing to do for work rn. so I need to focus on that#GOD DAMN IT!!!#imma be honest. haven’t been good since I went to a thing that was supposed to help my ptsd#may have made it worse! oops!#curses!!! my plan to draw toxic yaoi hath been FOILED!#now I just have to live with that!#SCREAMS#sigh#maybe I need a nap#or euthanasia#either or would be fine
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lowkey feels like the world is burning around me (le Canadian sigh) but all I gaf about rn is YAOI <3
#is this coping?#am I coping good?#and tbh. I do care and wish there was something I could do but everything is getting SO fucking expensive here#so all I do is work and try to enjoy my (very little) free time#because my rent is 2k a month and food is impossibly expensive now#*le internal screaming*#and ik this is tumblr but please don’t try to get on me about doing more I cannot possibly do more#I live a 30 min drive from the boarder too I need to LEAVE#but I love my city!!! ugh#still. debating just packing up and moving up north#wouldn’t be good for me in a lot of ways#but genuinely I do not trust being so close to America rn…#sorry Americans. ur president is fucking insane lol#not that our politicians are much better here… I will explode all politicians with my mind#just u wait
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Incredibly hard to draw Walter looking Cool or Sexy tbh. Because really he is just an old bald man. Nothing wrong with that! Just can’t take myself seriously while drawing him.
#even Jesse is so silly tbh.#I prefer him in s1 and s2 which is his least serious looks#like buddy. you look so freaking funny why do i want to see you beat up and fucked#hmm
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Leyendecker inspired… I am finally redrawing that One Thing I never finished because I fucked it up immensely LOL
#waltjesse#will absolutely be fixing Walt’s face. doesn’t look right at all#hrmm….#and I probably will add the muzzle last minute#so I can have a version without it as well#and YES I am slowly chipping away at the other piece I’m working on rn#just got sick of it lol#the fact that I’m doing a study while drawing yaoi is so fucking genius#getting practice in and fujoing out??? yes PLEASE#I’ve been on a roll recently despite having no fucking time to myself#just chipping away at things at every chance I get#don’t care about anything else rn. need waltjesse#*salivates like a rabid animal*
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coloured + rendered a bit… lots more to go…
WIP… nothing to see here. just 2 friends in the desert…
#wip#this is so fucking goofy imo but I’m having fun! so who cares#me#I care…#😔#colours need to be corrected. a lot#Jesse needs his tattoo obvs#I feel like this is my most accurate Walt + Jesse portraits…#I’m ngl. I think my brain is getting bigger#I hope#classical art training hath returneth to mine brain#huzzah!#and yes. i drew walt in the stupid towel/bungee cord thing bc i didnt want to draw his bald ass head.#so SUE me
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WIP… nothing to see here. just 2 friends in the desert…
#waltjesse#tfw ur homie who’s actually ur chem teacher unzips ur fly for u ❤️#this is what real allyship looks like!#wip#and yes. I am starting another piece. will I finish it? probably no#don’t be afraid to bug me in dms over this. someone’s gotta#suggestive
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OP ur so right…
there should have been at least one scene after Jesse gets the shit beat out of him where Walt comes over, pries his mouth open and thumbs over all his teeth. inspecting him like a prized show dog, making sure they're all still intact. like honestly i think that would have fixed me. send post
#I want to do more of this… too busy rn#but I have been thinking about this post since I saw it. needed to make a visual#waltjesse#jesse pinkman#brba fanart#waltjesse art
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tbh. need to get back on my fanart grindset... I think I have lost joy for most things in life rn and I need to regain my whimsical attitude and learn to have fun again... idk tho! the winter always brings me down but this year has been extra bad for no reason in particular. some dumb drama w my family (as per usual) but nothing crazy. ok maybe a bit crazy. I just don't get excited for anything anymore. even projects that I would normally feel excited about just drain me now. erm.. tbh I may just need to get sober again.
also can it just fucking snow here?? I want to go sledding!!!!!
#im ngl tho im convinced that if the economy got better like 75% of my mental problems would disappear#and it would be SO much easier to get better if i was busy#and im even less busy because im spiraling#so its kinda snowballing rn#idk!! not even sure why i use this site as a diary sometimes!!#its just like i dont talk to anyone about my problems rn#im supposed to see a councler or therapist or some shit in 3 months so maybe ill be better then? but idk#but that wont fix the fact that everyones poor rn and i work in a non essential job. im so lucky to do what i do#but when i cant do it regularly it makes me lose all hope for everything#and it doesnt help that im also losing money by not working enough#ok rant over i need to stop being a lil bitch and get my shit together#and start drawing more yaoi
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Jesse we need to ____?
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they’re the same picture
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wip of something >:)
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i will... draw for fun... the things that..... bring me joy ...

#this hits so hard when u do it professionally lol#like i love my job its awesome but ive lost so much steam to make personal work#to the point that its just embarrassing#need to get back into it... i promise myself i will do more in the winter#but rn im really into re8 so thats what im doing outside of work
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NSFW/OOC
重點完完全全沒有遮到(°∀。)
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