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my name’s kitty and i make ship aesthetics instead of sleeping

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HE THINKS I LOOK PRETTY WITH BLOOD ALL OVER MY FACE!

juniren aesthetic surprise for @cachinnavi  ♡!

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@cachinnavi / random starter.

“Oi, you awake?” his voice (rumbling, like thunder in the distance; ominous, dark, foreboding) echoes in the otherwise silent room, eyes narrowing into a squint as he observes the lump (which he assumes to be ren--sulking or seething, he wasn’t sure which) underneath the covers on the bed stirring and shifting before it stills.

“Ren.”

He waits, leaning against the door frame with arms crossed.  He’s learned that, in order to deal with Ren and his... moods, one has to has a certain degree of patience to them or else they’ll go mad.  So, he waits.

The silence stretches on, Junichi’s concern (and annoyance) only rising with every passing second.

No response.  None, whatsoever.  He guesses today’s not going to be an easy one (then again, when is it?)

A sigh, edging onto a growl, is heaved before he moves to sit on the edge of the bed, reaching out to drag the covers away until he caught sight of Ren.

(ah, fuck--he’s been crying. shit.)

“Aw, babe--why are you cryin’?” Junichi allows for some concern and affection to coax his words, calloused hand cupping Ren’s wet cheek so uncharacteristically gentle.

(it takes all of his strength not to tighten his grip, to resist the urge to bruise and hurt.)

“C’mon, tell JunJun what’s wrong,” he coos, easily playing the role that Ren wants him to play.  His thumb catches a stray tear, eyes hardening even as he hums and wipes it away. “How can I fix whatever’s wrong if you don’t talk to me, huh? My feelin’s are starting to feel a little hurt, right now--”

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cachinnavi‌:

He wanted it. He wanted it. He wanted it so damn bad. To see Junichi lose his grip! To see Junichi’s fury!

He wanted that and so much more!

Grin was steadily building itself up on Ren’s visage, increasing in intensity as he had explained. There was no shame. There was no semblance of morality. He’s given up on seeming like the well-behaved boy (good boy! what a good boy he was! his parents would be so proud!) he once was, forgoing it in exchange for prying and prodding. So badly did he want to clutch at Junichi and keep him all for himself.

“What’s wrong, Junichi? Stupefied? … Awestr–”

Not one moment of peace was given to him after wards.

Once he felt the crash of head against head, he’s lost all and any idea of proper balance. Teeth bit down hard on tongue, spraying blood into his mouth and causing for red to gush once he’s fallen down to his knees before Junichi. Thighs quivered. Shoulders quaked. He’s struggling just holding himself like this until, finally, it was overwhelmed by the need for him to sit. Breathing went ragged and heavy, Ren stifling the need to laugh in the other man’s face as he could feel the rush of blood flow from his nose. He had almost forgotten how truly fragile he was up until now.

“Ju-Junichi, you… you–”

It was so hard to talk, even as Ren had already begun to try and recover from the ferocity. He blinked rapidly, trying to chase away the belated stars he was seeing from the impact and resisted the urge to swallow, not yet aching to choke on his own blood.

“–!!”

He managed to strangle out a muted yelp once hand wrapped itself around throat. Lifted– he’s being lifted with so little effort. Out of sheer impulse and the need to touch, to crave, and to feel, he’s clawing and clutching at Junichi’s arm that held him hostage. Blood leaked from his nose. Eyes went wide, as big as saucers. Ren could feel blood rushing up his throat (like the disease ridden rodent he was.), and he was unable to suppress it from escaping in a painful, haggard cough that splattered onto Junichi’s arm.

“Hhaha…” he croaked out, feeling his legs shake as he found himself thankful for the way Junichi held onto him. “You’re… You’re mad a-at me… aren’t y-y-you?”

(it’s almost erotic.)

“Cute… Cute. I-I-I missed this ssside of… of you.”

Trying to breathe felt so labored. He wasn’t sure if it was because of the tight grip or if it was because of Junichi himself. He tried to swallow then remembered that he shouldn’t, instantly regretting it in the form of another coughing out of crimson.

“They didn’t… know, you know? I d-didn’t tell them.”

(harder. choke me. harder, harder harder HARDER!!)

“You’re s-so… so mad, Junichi… What’s, um,” a pause to try to gulp at the air, “wr-wro~oong, huh…?”

His grip tightens, eyes harsh and cold as he watches Ren choke and struggle within his grasp.  It would be so easy, almost too easy, to simply... snap his neck.  A quick twist and it’s over.

It would be so easy. Junichi doesn’t want easy.

(he doesn’t know what he truly wants, other than this; ren, at his mercy, in his grasp, under his control. he wants him, right where he has him, always. it’s an itch he’s always been unable to scratch, even during all those years they spent apart.)

“Quit fuckin’ clawin’ my arm,” Junichi drawls, fury still tightly coiled and present throughout his entire form.  It’s a bomb about to explode, merely seconds from triggering and detonating.  He gives him a moment to hear him over the rush of blood in Ren’s head before a snarl echoes in the room and he raises his free hand to deliver a harsh (stinging! aching! absolutely painful!) slap across Ren’s face.

(he wants to destroy him, to be his ruination. he knows ren would allow it, too. he’d accept anything as long as it was delivered by junichi’s hands.)

“I said, quit fuckin’ clawin’ my arm--or did your ears quit workin’ while I was away, huh?”

Hands fall away from his arm and Junichi nods his approval, though his grip does not change.  If anything, it only tightens even further (was he going to pass out? pathetic! worthless! maggot!) before he simply drops him completely, expression never changing even as Ren lets out a distressed cry of pain as he lands on the ground.

“Pathetic--why’d ya even marry her if you were just going to kill her, anyway?” It’s a rhetorical question.  He doesn’t want to hear Ren’s nasally voice again, doesn’t want to hear the pride and enthusiasm in his tone.  “Why rob your sons of their only decent parent?”

It’s a rage he’s only felt once before. He’s forgotten what it felt like, to feel alive with fury running through his veins.

(in a way, he has ren to thank for this--it’s been a long time since he’s last taken out his frustrations in such a way.)

Ren opens his mouth, as if to speak, and Junichi delivers a swift kick to his ribs.  A satisfying crack, even more thrilling than the breakage of his nose, echoes in his eardrums.

God, he feels alive.  More alive than when he killed his father.

He squats down, head cocking to the side as he observes how Ren wheezes and clutches his side in pain.  His eyes, though, still hold laughter.  He still thinks he’s in charge of this situation--Junichi’s here to prove to him that he’s not.

“I’m done listenin’ t’ya ramble ‘bout bullshit--” he says in an almost conversational tone as his hand reaches out to grab hold of a chunk of Ren’s hair, mockingly patting his head first. “--now, I’m going to break you, okay? Try not to scream too loudly--I’m not in the mood to kill your assistant today.”

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Bastille – Flaws

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“You look mean” bitch I am. Move.

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cachinnavi‌:

For the first time in a while, Ren’s realized that he was wrong. Painfully and utterly wrong, and the sting–!

The sting of that revelation was the worst feeling he’s felt in a while.

“O-Oh?” he purposefully stuttered, eyes widening again without making an attempt to rise. Hand had risen to cover mouth out of meager attempt of saving him from even more embarrassment. “That’s… That’s really creepy of you to say, Junichi.”

Yet, as always, Junichi was right. He was sweating, and god… god, he knew his eyes were probably dilated to high hell. He’s continuing to stare up at his newly hired bodyguard, though, and corners of mouth twitched busily (it’s scary! this is too scary!) out of what could have been anxiety. Saying his name in such a helpless tone made him feel so vulnerable, but it’s not like he could stop. It’s the one thing he had control over.

(junichi, junichi, junichi, junichi junichi junichi–)

They weren’t young anymore. The man that’s since stood and leaned forward was no longer the same handsome boy Ren’s remembered crushing on. No, he was something else– something better. Even as the frail mayor’s subconsciously retreating into the plush of his office chair, he never dares to look away. He felt one large, intruding bead of sweat roll down his temple, his cheek, and, finally, end at his chin. There was a strange feeling of endearment Ren’s felt towards Junichi, even if he were faced with inevitable peril.

Ah, he’s such a roach. He’s a disgusting, pathetic, little, fucked up roach, but he loves it so.

“I thought I could,” he nearly blubbered out, mumbling as teeth nipped nervously at lower lip from behind hand. It’s so frightening, being this close to Junichi, yet Ren didn’t feel the dire need to escape. “I… I really thought I could.”

(–junichi.)

Upon interrogating and domineering persistence of truth, Ren’s allowed for his hand to sink, fall, and drop into his lap. Fingers curl around and within each other as he dips his head forward (but only by a little. he still wants to see junichi’s lovely eyes.) in submissive bow.

“Alright, I’ll tell you.”

If Junichi wants to know the truth then he’ll get it.

“I killed her.”

“I put my hands around her throat and did it slowly. Her eyes bugged out– went wide as dinner plates, you know?” It’s steadily spilling out, Ren’s shoulders occasionally quaking in what was silent laughter. “You can’t kill ghouls like that as easily, though, so I kept… doing it. Kept choking the everloving fucking life out of her, and I liked doing it. Unti~iil she would stop - fucking - writhing like the greasy maggot she was. And when she did?”

Distinct pause overwhelms the room, permeating it with Ren’s choked laughter before hands slammed down onto desk interrupted it. He’s rising out of his chair, too, and he’s nearly butted heads with Junichi’s as he’s speaking.

(yumiko yumiko, yumiko, yumiko yumiko yumiko yumiko!!)

“I chopped her up! Cut her up into cute, little pieces– cubes, I think! I was trying a new recipe, you see!” Head tilted as if he were trying to entice Junichi into laughing along with him. “Ate her the next morning with my lovely, ever always fucking amazing sons, too.”

A sharp hissing snicker escaped from disgusting man’s lips.

“It’s a pity she tasted like shit, though.”

There was a certain kind of satisfaction coursing through Junichi’s veins when Ren finally realized how well and truly trapped he has him.  A shudder threatened to escape him, to rack through his body, but he managed to suppress it.

Now’s not the time, to savor Ren’s fear.  No, now was the time to listen and finally finish his puzzle; time for the final, grand picture to be revealed to him for the first time.

It makes him sick.

(he remembers yumiko. he remembers how kind and gentle she was when he knew her back in their school days. they weren’t close, not in the way that he was with ren, but they were friendly to one another because she was nice. she reminded junichi of his mother, with her soft smile and kind nature--it just makes his blood boil at how their lives ended.)

He manages to remain silent and outwardly calm, despite the clenching and un-clenching of his fists.  Seeing him angry, letting Ren witness his rage build up, would only please Ren.  Seeing any emotion, extracting any kind of response, from Junichi pleased Ren; no matter what it was.  It was how he’s always been, poking and prodding at his stoic protector to see what made him tick.

(and god, was ren good at getting under his skin.)

Junichi rears his head back before headbutting Ren full force in the face, hearing the satisfying crack of Ren’s nose being broken.  A small pleasure he allows himself, eyes tracking the other’s fall to the ground, ears taking in his pained grunts (and suppressed laughter--he can hear it in ren’s voice. he’ll take care of that, though, soon enough. soon, he’ll be the only one laughing).

“You’re disgusting,” Junichi snarls, his barely suppressed rage clear as day on his face.  “Absolutely fuckin’ disgusting.”

He stalks to the other side of the desk, reaching down and grabbing Ren by his throat to haul him up into a standing position.  Cold eyes take in his appearance, lips faintly tugging up into a brief smirk at his busted lip and broken nose.  It’s a good look on him, but Junichi refuses to feed his ego now.

“Fed her to her own fuckin’ sons?” His father would’ve done the same, had he not been so greedy of flesh himself and wanted to force Junichi to watch him. “That’s pretty lowly of you--are you sure you’re not the greasy maggot yourself?”

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absently plays with his hair while ren rests his head against junichi’s chest. a rare, serene moment for the often chaotic couple. odd, but not unpleasant in junichi’s opinion. it felt... nice to simply /exist/ sometimes. especially when ren is also content to allow the tranquility of the moment between them. junichi allows his eyes to close and his guard to lower, shifting to wrap an arm around thin waist and pull said body closer to his. a nap, he thinks, is in order.

@crudelibus​- ❤

For once, he didn’t bother.For once, he didn’t try to provoke.

Any little thing (though, to ren, they were magnificent. works of art.) that Junichi had done, Ren allowed for himself to simply sink and melt into it. Fingers brushed against scalp. Own hands rested against larger man’s chest, the mayor silent and forgiving towards the peace. It was like a gift– a gift that he simply didn’t want to push away. It felt nice, admittedly, to let time tick by, to shamelessly waste time, and to worry about nothing but the present.

Lips parted, murmuring remnants of what could have been “I love you” and “JunJun” yet could only retain their selves at soft, mumbling levels. He felt content. He felt blessed. It was as if nothing else mattered.

In a way, it didn’t.All that mattered now was that Junichi was here.

Light sound of pleasure escaped, Ren seeing no point in silencing himself once arm had coiled around him. He let himself be pulled closer, Ren shifting once or two before reacquiring his own piece of comfort in this shared position.

Head raised seconds later, eyes catching glimpses of Junichi’s now shut eyes and the lessening of breathing. Ah… he could almost cry at the very sight of it.

Attention removed itself (he couldn’t stare for too long. it would’ve been too tempting to kiss him otherwise. he had to resist. had to resist for junichi’s sake.) moments later, the smaller man trying to huddle closer and stretching one arm out to wrap loosely around Junichi. Fingers lazily clasped at shoulder, procuring a barely there grip as Ren allowed for his eyes to shut.

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u may think u overreact but are you “impulsively gets married, has two sons, then kills wife all because junichi disappeared w/o a trace” levels of EXTRA that ren is?

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junichi Genuinely does not care about anyone’s feefees. mans barely cares about his own honestly. unless you have an Actual Connection™️ (a special bond, shared history, etc) with him, chances are he doesn’t care about you. this isn’t to say he hates others (unless they’ve given him reason to be hostile), he just... doesn’t feel anything. that’s apathy culture babeh.

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if you could smash anyone who would it be

can i smash them into the ground instead of having sex with them 

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@carcasethief | random starter :~)

The bell above the door rings, a shrill noise (he wants to smash it every time he comes here, eye twitching as the noise assaults his ears and he fights the urge to break it), announcing Junichi’s presence.  He scans bookshelves as he meanders towards the front counter, gaze going from book titles to meeting the stare of the man (ghoulghoulghoul--he smells it) behind the counter.

A tender friendship he’s managed to form, simply through a similar appreciation for good books.  Unexpected from a man such as Junichi but, then again, he’s always been a sort of paradox.  Never doing exactly what’s expected of him.

“Hey,” he greets, hip leaning against the solid wood, arms coming up to cross as a grin forms almost lazily across his lips. “Any new book recommendations for me?”

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“What do you imagine our future looks like?” It’s a question Ren himself once asked Junichi when they were young. It’s a question said with far less innocence that it had been originally asked with, instead the words are coated in Junichi’s own signature poison (is it spoken with love and affection dripping from every syllable? or is trickery and deceit? both?). A hand, capable of so much pain and suffering, gently rubs along Ren’s side as he awaits an answer to confirm what he already knows.

@crudelibus​ - ❤

The future? … Their future?It’s enough to have Ren shudder!

Question was of a familiar nature, one that he recalled almost as clear as day. He had asked him this so many years back (looked at him with glassy eyes. held him back by the wrist. looked at him directly. asked him in only a murmur.) to little effect, only having received a strong embrace that maybe was too tight with lips pressed to his forehead, murmuring “I’ll be here.” into skin. He remembered having a good, long cry after that and having to stay overnight with him somewhere desolate, somewhat abandoned, and somewhere quiet.

At times, he wondered why he didn’t try to go any further during that day.

“… Um…”

It’s put him into an undeniable silence, Ren wondering if the question held any sort of gravity other than to simply fill time and space. Hands were resting on chest, the mayor as close as he could be to Junichi with other male’s hand grazing along (up and down. ren recognizes the touch and dedicates it to his memory.) his hip. He swallowed, eyes now downcast towards their pair of chests that nearly touched. It’s hard not to squirm. It’s hard not to writhe. It’s hard not to simply lose sight and lose control when he’s around Junichi.

There have been times where he wondered if all of these questions were mere made to hurt him– to dig under skin (claw into flesh! grab at the bones! break them!) and to make him cry. Peering up at him for but a moment, Ren’s already decided that he would be okay with that. If that’s what Junichi wanted then he’d be more than happy to oblige.

In some ways, he knew this was sad but it didn’t matter.Junichi could use him all he wanted, and Ren would smile and laugh alongside him.

At least, in a way, that meant that Ren was useful to him.

“Together? Yeah, together. … If that’s okay with JunJun.”

At first, it was a simple answer with him peering away once more. Upon lips were a light smile, Ren almost bashful with the very idea. It was partially a show while also retaining sincerity. Hands press harder (but not too hard. he just needs to feel.) before sliding themselves up to loop arms around and hook fingers behind Junichi’s neck.

“I want to marry you,” he admitted seconds later with no shame and no regret. “I’d be the wife, and you’d be the husband.”

Almost like they’d be playing a game of house.

“Or… I’ll be whatever you want me to be.”

(i can be the dog if you want.)

“I just wanna be whatever makes JunJun happy.”

Another slip into informality, something that Ren’s been noticing that’s worsened ever since Junichi returned. He’s slipping and slipping back into carelessness whenever he’s around, like he truly had no control over his life from the very start.

“Whatever you want– I’ll do it,” he uttered, raising his head to gaze up at him with no hesitation nor reluctance. He tries to shuffle a bit closer, expression flinching at the realization that they couldn’t be any more intimate. However, he could make due. He’d have to. “I love JunJun.”

Shameless. Disgusting. Grotesque.

“I love you,” he repeated, clear and concise with eyes that looked on the brink of tears. He wouldn’t cry (unless that’s what junichi wanted. he’d try to cry in exactly the way he wanted him to.) but looks could and always would be deceiving. Head tilted, somewhat innocently. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

He recalls all the times Junichi’s randomly inquired of ring sizes. He recalls all the times he caught Junichi’s gaze on the nape of his neck. He recalls piecing together all the puzzle pieces into something… comprehensible.

It could all be a clever ploy, something used to hurt Ren and leave him broken but wanting. It could all be something more, a way to wrap a rope around Ren’s waist and pull him closer. Either way, it’s the perfect trap.

Ren doesn’t want to leave. He likes the pain. He likes the pleasure.He loves everything there is about Junichi.

“Maybe we will be married. A happy one– with a nice house, a big yard, and cute dates every weekend.” Lips expose teeth in toothy, little grin. “With pretty rings, too.”

All of this should have been embarrassing. He’s never been one to discuss, to talk, and to reveal these precious little details. Had anyone else asked him and promptly mocked (like he expected.) him, he may have actually cried. He may have actually choked on his words and retreated into himself. With Junichi, though…? He felt simply compelled to spill his guts.

“We wouldn’t have to take anyone’s names– unless… unless you wanted me to.”

(watanabe ren…?)

Junichi taking Ren’s surname? He wouldn’t even offer it as a joke. His protector (his god!) deserved better. Always in charge and always comes first.

(it has a certain ring to it.)