croutonconfidential

[croutonconfidential]

When I worked at Red Robin a lot of my job was balloons. Thats right, it wasn’t all fursuits and scaring each other. I also learned the valuable life skill of how to fill up a balloon with helium. There’s an art. A technique.

If I was the opening host I had to fill a bunch of balloons for the ravenous masses of children. These were released to float in the little arcade that had a lip on the ceiling to keep them contained.

If I was a closing shift I had to dispose of all the unenjoyed balloons left over. All day long I’d hand balloons to sticky little hands. I listened to the constant screeching that heralded a lost balloon.

Then one day, I learned a secret. A hidden bit of magic that I could immediately tell was going to change the game for balloons forever. I learned how to tie a slip knot.

Suddenly when children asked for a balloon I could tie it to their wrist while their parents applauded my foresight. The wailing of watching a balloon streak away through the sky ceased on my watch.

I was drunk on this new power.

One morning I was opening. I was filling balloons and I thought- I could save even more time if I just premade the knots! I gathered up my balloon babies and unto each one I bestowed a little slipknot that could secure right onto a wrist.

When I was done I looked across my handiwork, the balloons strewn across the arcade ceiling and my fever of madness broke. Suddenly I felt vaguely uneasy about what I’d done. Instead of little strings hanging at a child’s head height it looked more like… nooses. Each balloon looked like a cartoon gallows, ready to slip around a child’s neck and carry them away into the sky.

My manager came up to join me. We both regarded the field of hanging balloons. He cleared his throat and said, “Maybe we won’t pre-tie the knots anymore.”

I mumbled embarrassed agreement and never again made a gallows field of party favors. I did however use my balloon making skills later in life for nefarious schemes.

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Hnnng emotions about this are being had

anbu sai x genin ino

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fr I got two times the notes on my previoussly highest performing post and I’m not even a jayvik poster it’s insane

istfg jayvik nation needs to calm down. 500 notes in a day. now my most popular jayvik post's at 1.5k. like HELLO???

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He will never give up on you and in some way that is what must terrify them, he's got dirt under his nails he'll dig out whatever good version of yourself you've tried to bury, you're forced to confront you're own capacity to be more than what you are now, if its a twisted version of your past self or you've never had ay chance at being anything other than damaged he's there , and you have to deal with the fact that he's there open arms ready to help in anyway he can and here you are stuck with the choice of doubling down on what you are pushing him away, being exactly what you are or taking his hand and letting him help and deciding to change again

if you were at your worst, if you’re a villain or a screwup or whatever, there is a goth man dressed as a giant bat who keeps coming after you, bothering you. he sabotages your journey of self destruction over and over. ur ready to give up but he won’t let you. you think, today he won’t come. today he will give up on me too. he never does.

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I haven’t really scoped out much of the opinions on Mel x Jayce and the prevailing opinions but I’m aware that there is discourse about the authenticity of their relationship and I just want to say that when we first get introduced to Mel she’s shown as this rich wealthy woman aiming for an increase in her profit margins and saying that even for all her wealth as one of the richest women in piltover she is still the poorest medarda which is clearly a thought that lives long term in her head she deflects mention of her wealth because it is overshadowed in comparison to the wealth of her family

we see her first in this large pristine white room with tall wide windows and gold accents her very space is large and wealthy and we are immediately shown that she wants more

she’s selecting a birthday gift for a councilor and selects a child’s toy remarking that it’s the perfect gift and when she gives it to her fellow councilor she tells him it was made for the sharpest minds, it’s an insult to him that he’s unaware of and a joke meant only for herself, that gift is not goodwill but her politicking, in Jayce’s trial Mel leads the councilor to vote along with Mel it shows her nature and her ability to lead and manipulate because that’s who you become when it’s a life of politics and Mel is doing it expertly, winning favor is winning power from the hands of others

she’s not shown with any genuine personal connections of any sort like a friend or sibling or parent or children like many other characters have been ,( like Jayce first being shown with cait, vi powder mylo and claggor all being shown together, vander and his kids, vander and his community in the last drop) the only other comparison I have to another character getting an introduction that shows no personal connection is maybe Viktor but part of his introduction is the beginning of his partnership with Jayce so I’m unsure if it can be compared the same as Mel’s introduction

she lives and breathes politics as a councilor and that’s all we know her as initially, it’s a strong first impression to us as viewers and its important to remember that when thinking about Mel as she changes through the course of the show and what that means when looking at Mel and Jayce’s relationship

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O don’t know 3am horny can be pretty powerful I think the y-value on that chart is slightly under estimated 🤨

peer reviewed and based on scientific analysis

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See, our first mistake was trying to have a civilization in northern Europe between October and February. The darkest three months of the year should be for staying home under the blankets, midwinter festivals, and getting blind drunk when the sun goes down at 4 pm like the bog gods intended.

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My baby

thinking hard about my one piece oc Lemu, a 23 year old homeless Birkan with no idea where to live or what to do. her very expressive face that im having fun drawing. her goals that i have yet to invent. she hates Enel and his cult but does she hate them enough to try hunting them down? i have no idea.does she even know who to blame for the destruction of her home? i know she makes friends with Jewelry Bonney after escaping a world noble's human zoo and gets dropped off at Sabaody during the Sabaody arc. and that she used to live on San Faldo(carnival island that supplies water 7 with iron, its on fandom wiki) and had a short term situationship with kaku before she left San Faldo. she travels through the skies on jet dials by herself, circumventing the need for a crew or ship, it bring attention to her theme of isolation and loss and maybe thats what i want her arc to be about. a total avoidance of winter islands because she hates the cold and refuses to dress warmly, i cant decide if i want it to be for a deeper reason or not. i want to create a backstory for Urouge where they know each other tangentially, maybe he was a school teacher or a distant cousin only seen at family gatherings idk i just want them to recognize each other on sight and bring their pasts to the fore. i want to create backstory for the destruction of Birka and what happened to its people. maybe i can do something about the history for all the winged races like Enel's side adventure of colonizing the moon by getting Lemu to meet King at Wano. idk.idk. theres so many possibilities

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my dad just said it was possible to rent a property on twelve acres land for a fair price and my immediate response it that you could hunt someone for sport there, that twelve acres is so large you could hunt someone for sport and the world might never know, it got laughs

my mom even referenced the most dangerous game, a well known english short story about hunting a man for sport

the take away from this story? im funny

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I think this is my most well to do post at the moment by a fair margin and honestly something about it sort of pisses me of idk why, I did a fan theory in one of my smaller fandoms and put what I think is considered more effort into that than I did this post and it took a much longer time to get as many notes as this post and well…I guess I’m just facing that this just wasn’t a meritocracy (?) (is this a meritocratic ideal that’s not being met? Idk) ( is this just what happens when I do something for a larger,more recent fandom for a ship that’s really popular?)

I feel like if Jayce just broke down sobbing on his knees in front of Viktor, asking for his partner back then he would have folded immediately, especially if he was reaching out for Viktor in that moment bonus points if Jayce was clinging to his leg refusing to let go

Viktor in his little astral plane container would have busted out or started fighting the hex core for full agency and try to purge it because all he ever wanted was his partner back and there that partner is wanting the same thing with the same amount of desperation and crying about it

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oh my god I just god the joke and it had to be explained in the tags I’m so dumb I thought it was just a drug joke and not a joke on powders name!!!

Vander: I've always liked the name Violet. Silco: *snorts a line* Hey, you know what I like?

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I'm actually posting this itama on his own, just bc it delights me so much

Laying in his pile of senju weed empire money. Close your robe, whore.

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I feel like if Jayce just broke down sobbing on his knees in front of Viktor, asking for his partner back then he would have folded immediately, especially if he was reaching out for Viktor in that moment bonus points if Jayce was clinging to his leg refusing to let go

Viktor in his little astral plane container would have busted out or started fighting the hex core for full agency and try to purge it because all he ever wanted was his partner back and there that partner is wanting the same thing with the same amount of desperation and crying about it

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....im a normal amount of obsessed

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FR FR I love it when systematic oppression is the real villain , love when that happens

Madara of this au intrigues me, his experience with an assassination attempt from children that are 50% his problem somehow, time travel on his brain now thanks to team ro, hearing that the village won’t serve his people in the long run like intended , seeing Itatchi cry (that kid is partially his responsibility and that kid thought the only way was to kill madara, ooo the conflict of “this kid tried to kill me and came up with the idea” “uchiha crying must fix “

Tora gets hit w the time travel beam *gestures vaguely towards the "team ro time travel to warring states era but make it Tora AU team ro" post*

And gets mistaken for a bastard senju kid and missing brother of Tobirama bc of the resemblance. But also using the same logic I used w Itachi of the "the only people allowed to draw the connection are people who personally knew Tobirama when he was Tora's age (which, if sticking to the original team ro prompt, would be like 12) so only like. The founders + Touka get to make that conclusion

Him 🤝 Tenzo -> getting mistaken for a Senju and getting lots of hugs from Hashirama that make them Feel Things (TM)

People are telling Tora he's probably a bastard kid and he's making deliberate eye contact w that one time he tried to break into the senju compound and was kicked out bc the gates keyed into senju blood specifically. He's pretty sure he's not a senju guys. Trust him. Really.

Mmmm ok but actually taking it seriously, how would Tora affect the team ro dynamics in that specific adventure? In my original post I went really in depth on what each character thinks of their situation + the founders, so would that change at all?

On top of that, since it's a few month before the Uchiha coup, it's also peak Itachi-Tora-Shisui chaos hours as they plot to stop it

I think it's mostly the same, tho maybe Tora's general affect on Itachi means he isn't quite so much in the "Hey what if we just kill Madara. What then." boat

But also I can see the opposite, with maybe Itachi instead getting Tora on the "Hey what if we kill Madara in his sleep" boat

Shisui can sense the "Tora and Itachi are doing something alarming" button being slammed in the room over and investigates

Oh my god worst possible outcome: they get Shisui on board too. I can see it tbh, they were looking for ways to avoid the coup and the possible village retaliation and like hey !!! Opportunity they sure as fuck won't be getting anywhere else!!!

Plus like, play into the "Itachi rarley offers his own opinion bc he trusts Tora and Shisui to be in charge, but when he does offer it he's listened to"

Well he sure did offer his opinion!! And he sure is being listened to!!!

They actually all just feed into eachothers stress and decide that yes. To avoid the Uchiha coup and or possible village retaliation (they dont know the massacre is on the board yet but suspect smthn similarly bad), this is the best choice to make.

It turns into Kakashi having to talk them all down (whether he does so in time or not is debatable)

They get stopped, obviously, (tho actually commiting to killing off Madara like that would be very funny) and Madara assumes it was Tora's idea bc hes a clear leading figure in the trio and the other two are Uchiha. Tora is willing to take the fall for his friend, but Itachi is not

Itachi has a whole breakdown and bursts into awful messy tears for the first time since his father took him out to a battlefield as a child.

It's a whole thing and everyone is horrified (Tora and Shisui especially but even Madara + whoever else was there are cringing awkwardly at the sight of a previously blank faced little kid just. Loosing it.)

Itachi confesses to it being his idea and, at this point we're past the time travel reveal, explains he just needs to make sure Madara doesn't freak the fuck out and inevitable fuck over the entire Uchiha clan w a shitty reputation that haunts him for years to come

Madara is horrified what the fuck

Also INCREDIBLY demoralized ab the village now, what do you MEAN he fucking left it what do you MEAN originally Izuna died (they were keeping them in the dark ab everything future-wise other than just the fact that the village existed but this kind of forced the lid off that pot)

Also note: Kakashi !! Was !! Not !! Aware of this !!! Holy shit kids !!!!!!

They end up having a whole Thing(tm) about how look even if Madara one of the causes of their shit reputation,,, it can't all be traced back to and blamed on one man. That's not how politics work you guys.

(Queue shocked Pikachu faces and disbelief of three teenagers)

Kakashi, having his own special front row seats to the Konoha politics and rumor mill + yondaime's student + experience with facing the worst of it bc of his dad, giving them some sort of speech about scapegoats and politics and the soul crushing realities of systematic oppression and blame

It's a learning experience.

[croutonconfidential]

Visual representation of notices around konoha offices.

Sakumo sex symbol agenda strikes again 😀

@uh-oh-its-bird