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[cringe-writing-overlord]

VOLUME FOUR: PHONES AND PHONIES

Download the soundtrack!

Bagel | Bahis

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Personal headcanon to bring this blog back: lowblooded trolls only die as early as they do because of bad treatment.

Think about it: all of the "good" food, which probably has actual nutritional value instead of just being bugs (eg: different meats, veg, and fruits) is probably hard to come by -- or downright impossible to find -- when it comes to the lower classes. They also are targeted often due to their weakness and the fact that lowbloods being brutally slaughtered is seen as just something that happens on Alternia, and killing a rustblood has the same amount if consequence as, say, stepping on an ant. There's no way they're given anything close to actual, proper medical care.

This isn't me saying a lowblood could be highblood-strong -- they are physically weaker and smaller than highbloods no matter what they do, just due to biology -- but their lifespans on a more "domesticated" planet with fewer batshit crazy threats and better medicine and base nutrition would likely amount to the lifespan of a healthy human, at the least.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

The people require marvus SMUT 🗣️

Same ❤️. Doing AMAB reader for this one because there's not enough of that.

🎉Marvus x Reader🎉

Nsft Below Cut!

___________

Marvus digs his fingers into the sheets, arching his back as much as possible, even though he's practically face-down ass-up already. He's tired, he's stressed, and he needs you.

Your hands run down his back as you press yourself against his ass. He grinds on you, huffing impatiently as you run your fingers through his hair.

You don't want to play around too much, wind him back up again. You push into him, and the way his nook clenches around you, cold as ice against your hot, warm-blooded body, makes you moan before you even get halfway in. Marvus sighs happily, some of the tension leaving his shoulders as you bottom out.

He's always told you how much he loves your warmth. He sleeps right next to you, usually, clinging to you like you're his own personal heating pad, and you can only imagine how it feels to Marvus, who throws his head back in a moan when you pull out and thrust back in, and, Christ, he looks like a top-tier pornstar from this angle.

Human dicks were, pretty obviously, not made for troll's nooks to take. They're not as soft as bulges, and they don't bend like the tentacles that trolls have. But they have an advantage there, too. You can rub up against every little ridge and soft spot and bundle of nerves that makes Marvus melt under you in the sheets.

His hair, slightly sticky with Faygo, cascades down over his shoulders. His body has a light sheen of sweat over it, making him look like he's glowing in the low light of the room. His face paint is fucked. Fucked beyond recognition. Smudged all over the pillow he has his face hidden in and, somehow, smeared down his chest in some spots. Your lips meet the back of Marvus' shoulder, and you mumble in his ear about how pretty he is. He lets out a broken moan and begs for you to speed up. Of course, you oblige.

Marvus does this pretty often. He'll come back to his hive from wherever the hell—a concert, church, maybe just a night out if it was particularly rough on him—and he'll ask you for this. It's one of the easiest ways to calm him down, and that's what you focus on as you caress his body, grope around, rub his grubscars, and fucking plow the tension out of him.

He's close. You can see it in his scrunched-up eyebrows and his shut-tight eyes, how his fingers twitch deeper into the fabric of the pillow he's gripping for dear life. And you can feel it while you thrust into him, with the way his nook is trying to suck you in and never let you go.

You stroke his bulge, giving it some much-needed affection as Marvus lets out a broken moan. You've learned a few things about him, in the while you've known him. One that really matters right about now is that he thinks that it is the hottest, kinkiest thing fucking ever to cum inside him. It's not something trolls do often, or ever, really. He was ecstatic when you asked for the first time if you should pull out or not, and he appreciates that your mess isn't hard to clean up at all when compared to the fucking flood that trolls leave behind.

And so, when he whispers for you to grab the bucket by the concupiscent platform, you speed up your thrusts. He comes just as you move the bucket beneath his bulge, ass still high in the air. You know how oversensitive he gets after he comes, but you also know he will get whiny as fuck if you pull out before you do, too. So you speed up, get rougher, chase that peak like a hunting dog chasing a rabbit, and Marvus lets out the most beautiful noises you've ever heard from him.

You come into his nook, balls-deep and sweaty as fuck, giving just a few more thrusts into Marvus that make him let out a few more little whines as you ride out your orgasam.

The bucket is moved aside, and you and Marvus sit in comfortable silence in eachother's arms. The tension in him has melted away, replaced with the sleepy afterglow of good sex, and when you notice that, you like to think you did what he asked of you pretty damn well.

____________

I LITERALLY STARTED WRITING THIS AUGUST OF 2023. FORGIVE ME. I AM JUST STARTING TO WRITE AGAIN HELP ME 💔💔

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Dude I just saw someone all-caps ranting in the ao3 comments about how most x readers are written afab... Like. Genuinely insulting the fic author. So I feel the need to say this on my writing blog:

FANFIC WRITERS DO NOT OWE YOU ANYTHING! They do not owe you a fic with your pronouns or features. I know it can be annoying! I get it! But good lord if you're so desperate that you're harrassing fic authors, WRITE. IT. URSELF.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

🏏Xefros Tritoh x Midblood troll! Reader 🏏

Xefros was a little uneasy being around someone with a higher blood color than him, even though you weren't mean to him. You were still stronger than him, and it made him nervous.

He appreciated your company nonetheless. You were kind to him despite his gutterblood status, and you never insulted him either!

Every so often, you'd pay for small things when you went out with him, insisting that you hardly noticed and that Xefros should save his money to get something he wanted anyways. After all, rubybloods didn't get much, unfortunately.

That was something else Xefros noticed. You avoided calling him a rustblood. When he asked about it, the two of you were in the company of his moirail, Dammek. You went on a sort of rant about how unfair it was for the lower classes to do so much work and be disregarded as disposable objects or even something inconvenient like rust, and how, without them, Alternia -- and the empire as it's known -- would collapse. You later apologized for your outburst, but it did seem to earn you Dammek's approval.

Xefros began to hang around you more as he developed feelings for you, but he refused to say anything about it to you. He didn't want to ruin your friendship -- he wasn't really worried about upsetting you anymore, as he knew you wouldn't hurt him.

You ended up asking him out first, and he was ecstatic. He literally started jumping and shit while he said yes.

He is fucking horns over heels for you dude, and nothings gonna change that.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Trying out something new and sharing headcanons. Working on smth for hiveswap soon :3

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I saw your bro post, and im practically yerning for more(this is me saying I'm requesting fanon bro familial stuff)

-📼

AYE I GOTCHU MAN!! Including some Dave because I ❤️ him.

🗡️F!Bro & Reader🗡️

You and Dave don't know where you came from, and Bro refuses to tell you. He doesn't say why, but you get the feeling he doesn't want you to feel any different from Dave, considering you are only a little younger than him.

You go to public school, but Dave doesn't. I feel like he would absolutely fucking hate it, so Bro homeschools him.

While Dave was given his first sword when he was about five, Bro quickly realized that this was a horrible idea and he couldn't just beat up his brother, so he gave you yours a tad early — considering you and Dave were close in age — before he turned you loose on Dave. It probably would've gone better if it was Bro, because you kicked Dave's ass way worse than anticipated.

Bro now just watches while you and Dave train and beat the fuck out of each other, ensuring nobody has to take a trip to the hospital.

He's always fucking with your hair. Like ruffling it and shit when you pass by him. It's best to just let it be because it's impossible to get him to stop.

Pray to god you get used to the swords in the fridge. And the other weird shit in that damn apartment. Otherwise it's hell on earth.

Bro teaches you how to flash-step. You pick up on it way faster than Dave, who gets exceedingly jealous about it and proceeds to train WAY harder to try and one-up you.

Bro thinks you and Dave being "rivals" is the funniest thing he's ever seen. Just two ten-year-olds going at each other.

I DID MY BEST AUGHHVA

[cringe-writing-overlord]

I hope I don't request to much I just can't write for SHIT so

Can I get a karkat with a STRESSED AS FUCK reader over FINALS so the reader when angry or stressed starts rambling in their mother language ( cuz that's what's going on 4 me rn 😭💪)

Also, I assume you also have finals so goodluck!! Unless you already finished. But I hope you pass!

-📡

I DID PASS MY FINALS!!! Only reason im not repeating anything bc I sucked all year 😭 I hope you pass as well my man 🤟🏻

Also I'm putting this during study time for finals for convenience

♋Karkat x Reader♋

It was hard for Karkat not to be worried about you. You kept grumbling in a language he couldn't understand and you'd been hunched over your desk, shaped like a C for the last three hours.

"WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN DOING? YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK YOUR FLIMSY HUMAN SPINE SITTING LIKE THAT." "I'm studying and it's making me really pissed off."

And then your pencil lead snapped while writing.

A torrent of words Karkat couldn't understand (but he could recognize some as swear words or something similar, based on emphasis) spilled out of your mouth as you shoved yourself up and out of your chair.

He didn't really know what to say, considering he couldn't understand you, so he went up to you and just... Started gently smacking the side of your face.

"Karkat, what the fuck are you-" "SHHHHH. SHOOSH."

It confused you out of being angry. You sat back down, extremely confused about what the fuck just happened as Karkat excused himself and left the room.

I HOPE THIS IS GOOD WAAAAUGHF!!

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Yo, just found your blog I rlly like it!

Can I request Tavros x reader who has to use crutches to walk around? I recently recovered from a broken foot and I can't walk on my own without them so lol. Take your time!!

HIIIII I love Tavros. Best guy ever ❤️

Keep in mind that I don't have any mobility aids! Some things may be innacurate, but I'm doing my best

♉ Tavros x Reader ♉

It wasn't that Tavros minded the crutches, really. He actually liked them -- it gave him a way to relate to you, and seeing someone as cool as you use a mobility aid really helped him feel better about his wheelchair.

He would decorate them in some way!! Probably smack on a few stickers on them for you, and possibly ask for you to do the same to some non-moving parts of his wheelchair.

Ok so now on some general headcanon shit I think he would LOVE hugs and shit. Give that boy a squeeze!! A smooch!! He will always flush and giggle every single time.

He always is up for some quality time with you! If you agree to watch one of his movies with him, he'll be giddy the whole time you sit and chill with him (and if you actually ASK and WANT to watch it?? Omg he is SO smooching you)

I feel like he'd fuck with your hair a lot of you'd had let him. Touch it, braid it, style it, whatever else. He's gentle as fuck too, he never tugs or pulls on anything.

THATS ALL I GOT RIGHT NEOW!! I love Tavros and I love WRITING abt Tavros so I hope u enjoy :)

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Hi I would like to request a relationship headcanon for a trans male reader dating Karkat and Gamzee. Nsfw is ok too

♋ Karkat + Gamzee x reader ♑

SFW:

Gamzee has a bad habit of squishing you and Karkat with his full weight. He's really tall, and his elbows, horns, and knees stab you all the time. You don't mind, but Karkat nags. A lot. Get used to that by the way.

Karkat is a chronic complainer when it comes to the two of you, but it always turns into a compliment somehow?? Eg: "HE STAYED UP ALL NIGHT WORKING. IT WAS REALLY LOUD AND ANNOYING. HE'S SO PASSIONATE THOUGH IT'S ADMIRABLE."

Gamzee always smells like faygo. You just have to get used to it. It's ingrained in his skin at this point.

Gamzee kisses the fuck out of you both and leaves you covered in face paint 😭 It's also all over your clothes forever.

Both of them are horribly touch-starved. Karkat couldn't trust many people because of his blood and Gamzee was just very lonely due to an absent lusus. They are on you like ticks all the time. Clingy boys ❤️

If you bind Karkat is on your ASS about safe binding. If he catches you wearing it for too long he will stop whatever he's doing to force you to take a binder break, and if you sleep in it? He gets so fucking worried dude.

If you take HRT shots, Gamzee helps with them while Karkat worries about the needle (He has a phobia let's be real).

Nsft under cut:

Karkat bites. He doesn't realize it until afterward when he sees a him-sized bite mark on your shoulder.

Gamzee is LOUD and MESSY. Dude spills everywhere and does not give a damn. It's always magically clean when you and Karkat wake up though.

THATS ALL I GOT AUGHA

He also tastes like faygo for some reason?? Like he's basically made of it.

Gamzee has an oral fixation and wants his mouth everywhere he can reach on both you and Karkat.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

It is I, again, with the asks.

Can I get a uhhh... One equius x a really sleepy purple blood reader? Like.... They just constantly fall asleep.

Take yer time!

-📡

HAAAIII I'VE BEEN NEGLECTING MY ASKS BY MISTAKE OOPSIE!!

♐ Equius x eepy reader ♐

You were incredibly lazy for a highblood. Most purplebloods were very high-energy, or at the very least they could keep their eyes open for five minutes. You could not.

Every time you went anywhere with him, his presence made you so comfy that you couldn't help but nod off. Even in public -- as two of the highest castes, it's not like anyone would bother you anyhow.

He was a very comfortable, very muscular pillow, so long as you could find a position to curl up in where your horns wouldn't poke him.

Your favorite thing was to kiss him before you napped. Usually, when you laid on him, he would complain half-heartedly about the improper way of sleeping or whatever, and you would lean your head up, give him a sloppy smooch, and lay back down on his chest.

Kissing his neck is also fun! Sometimes you leave hickeys on him and he has to get creative to cover it up since he always wears tank tops. He complains, but it's all fake. He loves it. The only time you can't is when he's in public -- he gets very embarrassed!

I COULDNT THINK OF MUCH ABABBBA!!! IT 3 IN THA MORNING HOLY FAWK

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Do siblings count in the familial relationships you’re willing to write? If so could you do one where Jade and the reader are siblings? 

They do, and I can!! Couldn't think of too much, but I tried!!

⚛️ Jade Harley & Reader ⚛️

You and Jade had to help eachother a lot groeing up. It wasnt easy being in the jungle, especially at your age, and even more so when your grandpa died.

You cared for eachother a lot. You mainly expressed it through simple things; taking her to her bed when she'd fall asleep, making her proper meals with foraged food, and attempting to keep your little tower tidy. She collected small things for you, drew for you, and introduced her friends to you later on.

She came to you a lot to complain about the trolls bothering her online. Once you could pin a name to them, they seemed to get even more annoying. Karkat and Tavros definitely wore her down the most though, and you had to admit you saw them through a filter when you first met them in person because of how uncomfortable they made Jade.

During Sburb, the two of you were inseparable. Jade protected you when she could, and you did the same, particularly when she would pass out at random and get swarmed by imps.

You stayed with her and John when you had the opportunity to go to the meteor -- you just couldn't bear the thought of leaving your sister behind. You were also very excited to learn that you were related to your friend John in some way, even if you didn't really understand it. It was like a family reunion!

But over the whole game, no matter how many people you met, you never got closer to anyone than Jade.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

Sup it's me space anon AGAIN

Can I get a uhh, fanon bro strider (basically bro not being a dick)comforting an adopted pre-teen reader getting made fun of for how they speak? Take yer time!

-📡

HIIII YES YOU CANNN!!!! I unfortunately couldn't think of much for this one but I tried!! :)

🗡️Fannon Bro & Reader🗡️

You were never really bothered by the fact that you were adopted. Your brothers never treated you as if you were anything but their flesh-and-blood relative that they've been living with their whole life.

You were trained just as diligently as Dave and Bro. Bro was careful and tried not to be too rough, but he still nicked you here and there.

There was only one big issue, and that was other kids. You had a slightly different vernacular and accent, not to mention a bit of a stutter. This combination led to ruthless teasing.

You wanted to fight them, but they were too cowardly to throw the first hit. You were the only one to go to public school, as Dave was homeschooled, and you didn't want to get expelled, so you kept your hands to yourself.

One day, though, you complained to Bro after a particularly bad bout of teasing.

"They've been saying what to you? Yeah, no, that's fucking stupid as shit. Kids are fucking assholes, there's nothing wrong with the way you talk at all."

He left for a while and then, suddenly, you weren't being bothered by those kids anymore. Huh.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

I got a request for this but I was writing half-asleep and messed it up 😭 YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE SPACE ANON!

🍰 Dad Egbert & child reader 🍰

It began when John and his dad stopped at a little playground near a forest after school. Dad hadn't seen any other cars around, but only a few minutes after his nine-year-old got out to play, another kid appeared to be following John around.

There were still no parents to be seen and nearby houses you could've run out from. His Dad Instincts™ kick in and he felt the need to check in on you.

Which was very much easier said than done. Every time he stepped towards you, you backed away. John sat in the middle of this standoff, utterly confused.

It took him about ten minutes to wrangle you, and three more to get you to talk. You said you didn't know where your parents were, you didn't know any information about them, and you had been alone in the woods for about two days. The moment you mentioned you were hungry, it was over, and Dad brought you home with him.

You ate half a cake by yourself and then proceeded to complain about your tummy hurting for the next half hour.

Even after a few weeks there, you didn't speak much, but Dad didn't mind in the slightest. He kinda just accepted that you were shy, and not much of a talker.

From the day he picked you up from the park, you were his kid. He treated you just like his own son and was the best, most accepting dad a kid could ask for.

[cringe-writing-overlord]

General Headcanons --- 🧡 Dirk x Reader 🧡

Sfw:

He's subtly clingy. You know how cats just so happen to be in the same room as you all the time? He does that before you get together. Bumping into you at the store, showing up to Roxy's parties more often when he knows you'll be there, seeing you around on walks, etc. He doesn't realize that it's creepy.

He does it when you're official too, but it's less weird when he's popping up in your shared house. Showing up while watching a movie and silently sitting next to you, silently hovering around you all the time, especially when there are people over.

He grew up with no/little human touch, and wants to be hugged more than anything, but he's kinda a wuss and won't be direct in asking. He's just like that. You have to get at least a little used to it.

He loves small gifts!! Big things freak him out a little and make him feel like he's gotta one-up it, but little things that you take a glance at and go "hey, Dirk would probably love this"? He does. Every little rock is put up on a shelf, and he LOVES flowers. He didn't exactly see many as a kid. He dries all the ones you give him.

If Hal ever tries to talk to you, Dirk is 110% assuming the worst no matter what Hal said, even if he was actually nice to you.

Speaking of Hal, for the love of god don't mention dirk's splinters or he will go into self-loathing mode for at least five hours.

Mentioning them during arguments is probably irreparable. And dear lord if you compare him to one of them (eg: "You're just like Bro!") he will literally never recover.

Nsft under cut:

He loves being tied up I think. Not even just handcuffs or something, but fully unable to move.

He pretends to be a super-dominant top but he is LYING.

This boy is LOUD as fuck. Whimpering, moaning, whatever. He's gonna make a lot of noise, even if he's gagged.

Didn't know what aftercare was probably - he's just been watching porn and they don't really show that. When you gave him food and water and started taking care of him he almost lost his mind.

That's all I have for this one, but YK WHAT?? I'm happy with it :)

[cringe-writing-overlord]

HIII! I wanted to say that I'm a new-ish writer, and I'm gonna be opening requests here!

Note: I currently have emergency commissions open for fics, as discussed here.

Rules n regulations:

I will not EVER do any noncon, underage, yandere, abuse, or anything of the sort. I will also not touch weird kinks (ddlg, pet play, etc.) write it yourself, weirdos.

The only time I will ever write about children is in a parent/familial affection type way. (PLEASE request some familial stuff omg its so fun)

Mainly write for Homestuck and Hiveswap, but I'll dabble jn other fandoms like Pokemon, Ghost BC, etc. From time to time.

Feel free to include very specific prompts and requests!! It usually makes things easier for me

I will not write for your ocs (oc x reader or x cannon isn't my style).

Please specify if you want a fic (short story) or headcanons (list of things characters would do, etc.) and keep in mind that fics will take longer!

I will not write for:

Doc scratch

Caliborn

Any characters that we don't know much about in canon (eg: Dammek, Trizza).

The prospitians, dersites, or consorts (except hanging out with the mayor bc he rules).

Minor notes:

Please include quadrant details in your request if you don't want a human-style all-quad romance!

I'm not available 24/7! I'm in high school, so I may not read your requests right away.

I have a bad habit of posting here and not my main 😭 please disregard when I do that

If your request makes me uncomfortable, I will not do it, plain and simple.

I also take requests specifically for Hiveswap 2's timeline, as that game has me in a chokehold.