chimsweetcheeks - Tumblr blog

[chimsweetcheeks]

good things will happen 🧿

things that are meant to be will fall into place 🧿

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

Reblog this and money will be entering your life this week

[chimsweetcheeks]

my anxiety about time

You know? I prefer when clocks stop their needles,

Like, before going to the next number.

When I see clocks that their needles move continuously

It just makes me feel like there's a rush.

I know I am pretty sensitive,

I have been ever since I was little

Did you ever count your classmates to know which paragraph you would have to read out loud?

Yeah, I was one of those

Can you blame me? My classroom had one of those clocks,

Felt like the needle never stopped pushing me over,

But at the same time I was going in circles,

Time is running and I haven't gotten somewhere.

Right now there's no school pressure,

Not even pressure from my mom for me to get a job

She knows the struggle after my siblings,

I'm young but I feel like time is rushing out and those needles won't stop dragging me.

I want to run and make a race,

But man, do I feel like the air leaves my lungs

And then comes again the needle to take me with it,

At least the other clocks feel like a push to keep going.

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

He is ruining my life. 🙃

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

NEVER FORGET THIS EXISTS!!!

[chimsweetcheeks]

Remember that movie in which Jack Black was a teacher and building a rock band and when a little black chubby girl asked to be a singer he only said “sure! let me hear you” and the moment she started using her beautiful voice his lit up like all of his dreams came true, PLUS the same little girl was scared that people would make fun of her because she was fat and he started listing awesome singers with some weight on and included himself and told her that people wouldn’t laugh because she is awesome at what she does and that is all that matters PLUS that it’s ok to enjoy food?

Also, when a little boy asked to be the band’s stylist he just said “sure, go ahead fancy pants” like, there wasn’t a single second of questioning it, he went into “ok, that will be your position then” right away

That fucking movie is an hour and a half of Jack Black teaching kids to love themselves disregarding all of the stereotypes

[chimsweetcheeks]

daily bangtan gifs ♡ [27/∞]

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

How Often To Clean Your House (aka Being An Adult)

Sprinkles And Crafts: A Food, DIY And Lifestyle Blog.

[chimsweetcheeks]

It doesn't even matter that I have everything to consider myself lucky anymore, I mean, I'm not the wealthiest but I have a roof, a bed and food, even people I hold really close to my heart and love them dearly but, even when accompanied by them I feel tired, even with warm blankets to cover me from the cold in the night I still get no sleep, even while doing my favorite hobbies I feel my anxiety and thoughts ruling over. I just don't enjoy things like I used to, and it is not fair because I know I have no reason to feel this way nor think that any part of my life is a lie. Because I know I'm giving myself too much importance when I think that those who are supposed to be my friends actually think of not telling me things or to exclude me in purpose when in reality they don't actually care if I'm there or not, when I am the one who shuts away. Because I know I'm not really a nuisance to anyone who is actually helping me out of good will, just because I don't like to ask for help as if I am going to become a heavy responsibility and they would do so for obligation or pity, because it makes me feel useless and stupid... Because maybe I stopped seeing opportunities but just spaces of free fall, my goals as a must failure due to how unprepared I actually am. And now, whenever someone does understand me and how it feels to think this way and tries to get some motivation into my head, I'm just hopeless. Anyone's words won't get me through for a long while, maybe for some hours, but as soon as I'm alone, it all just goes back to this nothingness.

I can't deny that sometimes I do enjoy the moment and can really feel some happiness, but everytime it lasts way shorter and I remain tired, mentally and physically, even emotionally. I'm just so tired of my own head even when I know I'm lucky I have what I have, that I love those who love me, but this heaviness is just exhausting, it's not even about feeling sad anymore. I mean, my worst fear is to die, to just stop existing and not know what's next, it scares me deeply but sometimes the idea to finally cease an unimportant being as myself is so appealing, to let myself rest way more attractive than to live so venomously with my head and self-hatred.

[chimsweetcheeks]

[chimsweetcheeks]

I want to write for you

Some cute letters and words

Maybe not for you to read

But for me to get out.

This could be forgotten

Or actually erased,

I just want to clear up my mind

Feeling like someone heard without getting tired.

I feel sad with no reason,

I get anxious over nothing,

I stress the things I do not do,

And fear when I get them done.

I am scared to say goodbye,

Even though sometimes it feels like a good idea,

I might be making someone uncomfortable with my thoughts,

But mind me, I just want to let them out...

Maybe that way they will not stay inside anymore.

This is more sour than sweet,

Maybe I got swiped off my feet,

Trying to be nice I went sad again

Trying to neglect this thoughts when I got wet in the rain.

Could this even be a poem?

The structure feels strange and foreign

For me to try and compose something warmer,

My thoughts just went colder.

[chimsweetcheeks]

If I wrote you something, would you be able to read it and know it is for you?

If I dedicated you a song, would you remember me everytime you hear it?

If I danced with you to our song, would you feel the steps even when I'm not around?

If I painted you a work of art, would you still see the colors when you close your eyes?

If I ever got to say I love you, would you even look at me?...