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my name is detective sleeping and im about to get started on my toughest case yet. the pillow case

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every time

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If you don't really care about kids you can get basically infinite deals with witches

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woe. delilah briarwood boss bitch be upon ye

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Your mother probably thinks you are a burden to the world and you should kill yourself and you know that

Sardine haul !!!!

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The idea that only women can give birth is a misconception. Men can give birth too and that's a mrconception

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Time to remember this marvelous tweet

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🦈

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‘Do Not Open’ is still one of my favorite episodes because of this absolute legend. He’s at the top of my list of badass people who survived encounters because they just ain’t with that shit.

An icon.

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au where michael distortion is replaced by micheal jackson

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a Very Important Purchase

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me and my friend jessie are physically incapable of having a normal fucking conversation so things happen where we accidently end up rping a dude bro trying to hit on me, an ordinary woman who is not a snake

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Large Frogmouth (Batrachostomus auritus), parent with chick, family Podargidae, order Podargiformes, Malaysia

photograph by Yfang Lim

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i read this to adam and he just yelled, outraged, "THEYRE BABIES"

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Ngl I totally forgot fandom discourse was a thing. I don’t care man, I have car payments