candleorfireflies

[candleorfireflies]

IN TIME.....

it’s impossible for us to find a perfect spouse if we model him/her toward someone, atau toward our own sets of criteria. The world just doesn’t work that way. We’re not God yang bisa bikin orang yang sempurna, sesuai dengan semua yang kita mau.

But we can try to find someone that just works....

[candleorfireflies]

A:Banguuuun

B: Udah

A: Jangan tidur lagi, langsung duduk

B: Iya udah

A: Langsung mandi! Sekarang jalan ke kamar mandi!

B: Udah

A: Maaana? Aku mau denger suara kerannya

B: Ck! Berisik ah, bentar lagi aja! Udah! Aku mau tidur 5 menit lagi.

A: yeeeee gimana sih katanya minta bangunin jam setengah 8, ini udah jam berapaaa?

B: Udah ah *call ended*

(tarik selimut lagi, ganti posisi tidur, nyoba tidur lagi, misuh-misuh)

aaaaaargh! (berdiri, masuk kamar mandi)

(di tempat lain)

A: *nyengir* mana bisaaa tidur lagi abis marah2 begitu, huuu

#fiksimini

[candleorfireflies]

the night I am crying myself to bed is mostly the night I am sorry for myself.

And nothing I have to sorry tonight, called me masochist, things that (everybody said) must be hurt, mostly get me hi!

pertama dan utama sekali ini ceritanya lagi surprised, thank God, for not letting me cry, but subtitute the tears into some kind of a horrible ache in my left side head, yup, migrain you named it! Apapunlah yang penting masi gaya, kalo ditanya lo kenapa? Pusing! daripada lo kenapa? nangis yaaa??? Uuuuh shame! ;p

All night, I am just trying to figure out why I feel so.... hmmm messed(?) I dont sure what is called, confused but dont know what I am confusing for, yup, messed, right?

and here a battle started; my heart feels like mess, but my head trying to find; why.

I want something, what I find is not the exact thing I want. I can't force the thing to be what I want, simply, it is not made for me, maybe for someone else. Proposition said that, the thing is determined for each of us, soooo what is determined for me, is somewhere out there, arrive someday(or perhaps it is only when I keep on learning to find it). So the only thing I have to do is let this thing I've find go, right? right? Right???

Make senses enough??

So this is not love (according to my opinion. Yeaaaaa what do you expect?).

here, finally, a little fact, a little out of topic:

Immanuel Kant: Rasional adalah suatu pemikiran yang masuk akal,sesuai aturan hukum alam.

Contoh: Pesawat dengan berat ratusan ton dapat terbang adalah hal yang rasional. Karena pesawat tersebut telah dirancang sedemikian rupa, sehingga sesuai dengan hukum alam

Nabi Ibrahim dibakar tidak hangus, adalah hal yang tidak rasional. Karena sesuai hukum alam, api itu panas. Namun kasus ini dikatakan logis (logis supra rasional), pemikiran yang kebenarannya hanya mengandalkan argument, tidak dengan hukum alam; Api adalah ciptaan Allah, yang terdiri dari dzat apinya, dan sifat panasnya. Allah sebagai pencipta dapat memerintahkan api tersebut untuk panas, hangat, dingin, semaunya, dan untuk menyelamatkan Ibrahim, dibuatlah api tersebut tidak panas, logis.

Love can be logic, because that is love, love is blind(argument).

Rasionalnya, according to my case, it just gonna be like that, love it or leave it, and nothing you need to cry.

So far, i can solve this situation with head, though my headache get worse, but finally, I dont know if I should have thanks or instead shame for this actually not about love, accomplised.

Maybe this is just about learning, fight for what you deserve. it's still make senses, it is not love. or, perhaps, not stupid love. pfffft.

And looong time ago, I were in love, I've tried to make it right, but it didn't seem to work out, when finally it didn't even makes sense, I gave up, I couldn't find the reason why I have that blind, the only reason is I were in love, never make senses, I feel so so so sorry for myself when finally realize that I love the wrong person, I cried.

Dont take it too serious, hehe, I enjoy the process, finding, and loving, and leaving, and hurting, and realizing, and learning, though it is hurt, there are the A,B,C, i wanna reach the next and next chapter, till I find the best part of all.

and I wish someday, I'm gonna be in love again, with the right person. I will.

(this actually story about yesterday, my head was to painfull to face the light yesterday)

[candleorfireflies]

Hail Tribal!!

[candleorfireflies]

Love is that BLIND. But we're all have eyes to see that all we need is NOT ONLY LOVE.

Even though I promised myself I wouldn’t risk the chance of getting hurt again, for some reason, when I’m with you, it all seems worth it.

[candleorfireflies]

monologue

am I ready? or not yet?// I don't know// ????????????// So when I start to try again? // I don't have to try// I'm not ready!// Maybe until I meet someone that make me suddenly ready, I dont know

[candleorfireflies]

First, I think relationship is all about , "I love you, and you love me, as long as I love you so you have to love me back, when u're not, me either. Why I should loving you if you're not loving me." Then I think i just haven't meet the true love yet. Relationship is about commitment and love. Love is willing to understand and grateful, willing to try to be better for each other, no matter what. That's how the Love works. I haven't meet it yet.

in time I will

[candleorfireflies]

If I can't have you the way I want you, I dont want you at all -Adele-

This is not love. Not STUPID love!

[candleorfireflies]

siiiigh!

about to have my periods, now I'm suffering PMS, a fluctuated emotional condition, tummy-cramp, anything u can blame to the hormon, I don't know, the one and only thing I can see clearly is everything seems so wrong! and hell what, I have to face an annoying moron police who doesnt know how he supossed to work, ruin all the image on his institutions, shame! and now I have to fucked up with all they call bureaucracy, shit bureaucracy, wish this all could work well out, oh well.. 

[candleorfireflies]

Travel is the simple chance of reinventing ourselves at new places where we are nobody but a stranger. 

Travel is the discovery of what and who we miss the most. 

Travel is the same pair of jeans for a week and different experiences every day.

Travel is finding new things and new people to miss.

Travel is discovering the part of yourself that you never knew existed before.

Travel is that one song in your iPod that will forever remind you of that one sexy afternoon somewhere.

Travel is the discovery of who misses us the most.

Travel is answering the question ‘business or pleasure’ without blinking.

Travel is deciding who will be the last call before you take off and the first call after you landed.

Travel is a test of your physical and emotional tolerance.

Travel is a one hour conversation that could lead to a lifelong friendship.

Travel is that one boarding pass you keep in your wallet to remind yourself one day when you’re gray and old that you were once cool.

Travel is waking up in a strange bed and feeling home and waking up in your own bed one day and feeling like a stranger.

It’s learning not to take every second for granted.

Travel is learning that the journey is as memorable as the destination.

Travel is discovering that random act of kindness does exist.

Travel is learning to communicate with just a smile.

Travel is not wanting to sleep because for once reality is more interesting than your dream.

Travel is not being afraid to fall in love with a complete stranger.

Travel is where broken English is welcomed with a wide smile instead of greeted by a grammar nazi.

Travel is where people that you talk to really try to understand what you’re trying to say.

Travel is finding out more reasons to write. And more reasons to live.

Travel, sometimes, is the rediscovery of our nationalism.

Travel is that one stranger across the street you will always wonder if he/she is your soul mate.

Travel is wearing those clothes you couldn’t wear back home.

Travel is realizing the things you cannot live without.

Travel is realizing that maybe you know nothing.

Travel is wearing a stranger’s jacket and feeling home.

Travel is meeting you. 

[candleorfireflies]

Today is World AIDS Day. On this day, we remember all those who have been affected by HIV and the AIDS virus. Millions of people around are living with the HIV and AIDS viruses, not to mention the millions upon millions of people who have succumb to the affects of this devastating disease. Do your part and get involved, become aware and always, ALWAYS play safe! 

[candleorfireflies]

theworldwelivein:

The Bridge | Gellert, Budapest, Hungary ©  arminMarten

[candleorfireflies]

reminder

kemarin habis baca sesuatu tentang "Low Latent Inhibition" dan "obsessive compulsive dissorder" , pengen review dan kebetulan saya punya sodara yang mirip banget ternyata kelakuannya sama gejala-gejala OCD. hahaha. tapi entar...... *procrastinating mode:on