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hands her pretty little wife a little necklace... it’s a locket.  if they open it  ,  there’s a photo of them ,  together.  she nudges her shoulder against tegan’s.  “  hey.  i love you.  what’s going on  ,  baby.  i miss you.  ”

@bestvictim​.

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grace + first vs. last appearance

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vereena has to have a strict routine or else she’ll feel like she’s dying. she can’t have something unexpected happen. if she’s put into a new situation or meets new people unexpectedly it makes her paranoid and triggers her flight or fight response and she always, uh... flights. 

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thinkin bout how annie has extreme separation anxiety bc she’s so afraid if she’s away from tegan for too long she’ll start forgetting them again and--

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#mood

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i thought the future was bleak before i met you.  DON’T BE A STRANGER.

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what grows in the ocean? your sense of loneliness and dread?  UNFORTUNATELY. 

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@bestvictim:  it’s okay, we can stay lost forever. 

she knows the sentiment is supposed to be sweet.  a promise of together  ,  forever.  that they can’t really be lost if they’re lost together.  but annie hates being lost.  hates it.  has spent years upon years being lost  -  losing things. people  ,  memories  ,  places.   so the words make annie pause  ,  make her blood run cold and her ears ring  ,  just for a second.  dramatic  ?  maybe.  annie is tired of being lost.  of losing things.  even if it is just hypothetical  -  even if the words were meant to be sweet and not leave a bitter taste in her mouth. 

“  let’s not get lost.  ”  it comes out more flat than annie means it to be  ,  resisting the urge to pull her hand away from her wife’s  ,  just for a moment.  then the thought is gone.  her free hand tucks away her hair.  “  we have people that we love.  ”  what she means is this:  they have been lost  ,  both of them.  separated by time and failure.  they were lost.  it was not okay.  it was never okay.  it will never be okay.  she never wants to be lost again.  

but this is all overthinking a throwaway comment.  annie knows this.  this does not comfort her head or warm her heart.  she and her sister have always been over-thinkers  ,  over-analytical and nervous.  she avoids tegan’s gaze.  lost.  lost.  lost.   “  we should go back to our townhouse.  ”

fever dreaming.

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❥     𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖  𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄   𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍   𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒   .

inspired  by  devotedecay’s  non - sexual  acts  of  dominance  meme  ! send  in  one  of  these  for  my  muse’s  reaction  to  … (  add  ❝  reverse  ❞   if  you’d  like  to  see  how  my  muse  would  preform  the  action  !  )

[ shower ]   your muse joining mine in the shower.

[ choke ]   your muse choking mine.

[ kiss + soft ]   your muse pulling mine into a tender kiss.

[ kiss + rough ]   your muse pulling mine into a rough kiss.

[ pin ]   your muse pinning mine down.

[ wrists ]   your muse roughly grabbing mine by the wrists.

[ push ]   your muse pushing mine into bed.

[ rip + clothing ]   your muse tearing a piece of clothing off my muse.

[ spank ]   your muse spanking mine.

[ pull ]   your muse pulling my muses hair.

[ talk ]   your muse talking dirty to mine.

[ eyes ]   your muse making mine look them in the eyes during.

[ down ]   your muse pulling mine down by their collar / clothes.

[ knees ]   your muse telling mine to get on their knees.

[ hips ]   your muse pulling mine in close by the hips.

[ denial ]   your muse putting mine through orgasm denial.

[ many ]   your muse making mine orgasm over and over.

[ tied ]   your muse tying my muse down.

[ lazy ]   your muse lazily beginning to touch mine.

[ love ]   your muse telling mine they love them during.

[ dominance ]   your muse taking the lead and dominating mine.

[ submission ]   your muse letting mine take the lead and submitting to them.

[ humiliation ]   your muse humiliating mine, re: name-calling and verbal abuse.

[ pain ]   your muse hurting mine in bed, whether intentionally or not.

[ knife ]   your muse using a knife in bed, whether for threat or actually cutting mine.

[ hidden ]   your muse having sex with mine somewhere semi-public.

[ public ]   your muse having sex with mine in public, whee other people watch.

[ adore ]   your muse being near reverent with mine in bed.

[ dress ]   your muse having mine dress up in lingerie.

[ eat ]   your muse eating mine out.

[ sleep ]   your muse touching / beginning to have sex with mine while they’re asleep.

[ gag ]   your muse gagging mine, or or making them be quiet.

[ blindfold ]   your muse blindfolding mine.

[ praise ]   your muse praising mine in bed.

[ good ]   your muse calling mine a good boy / girl.

[ want ]   your muse telling mine they want them.

[ snarl ]   your muse growling and / or baring their teeth at mine during sex.

[ mark ]   your muse purposefully marking mine up with bruises, hickies, ect.

[ wall ]   your muse shoving mine up against a wall.

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BEING MAD WON’T MAKE ME REMEMBER YOU. YOU GOT MARRIED AND -- 

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FEVER DREAM (2019) - of monsters and men starter sentences 

let me feel it out. 

i’m fever dreaming. 

it’s just what i’m feeling.  

i’m tired and i think i want to go home. 

catch me if you think you can. 

i could be centered and in place. 

i could dream you all away. 

i’m not over the shame. 

i’m waiting for the snow. 

i used to make mountains. 

what if i tumble? 

what can you offer me?

all i do is feel so heartless. 

we’ll figure it out, hand in hand. 

i think i wrote my own pain. 

i feel out of my mind all the time. 

i get lost in my delusional reality. 

it’s kind of hard to think about your own mortality.

you make me feel like a ghost. 

you make me feel like i’m lost. 

i know we’ll burn together. 

i’m careless and i’m wicked. 

i still have pieces of you stuck on me. 

it’s alright, we can stay lost here forever. 

it’s heavy, is that how it’s supposed to be? 

fuck the way we were. 

fuck all the times that i’ve fallen. 

the mind is a riddle you cannot solve. 

stay here, i want you. 

please don’t tell me it’s wasted love. 

stay here, i need you. 

you haven’t been dreaming. 

i still feel you around. 

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a silent voice 2016 film. suicide mention. 

“i woke up and you were gone.”

“is it okay… for me to have this much fun?”

“to be honest, i thought about ending things.” 

“they moved __ out of the icu.”

“now i’m starting to worry about you, sweetie.”

“just calm down. everyone’s staring.”

“you have to love the bad parts of yourself, with the good, and just move forward.”

“you’re going to catch a cold.”

“i’ve just been through a lot of stuff.”

“i’ll text you later, okay?”

“don’t hug me. i’m all wet.”

“you’re going to ruin your eyes reading in the dark like that.”

“come back here. i’m talking to you.”

< are you okay? >

< sorry. >

< my stomach hurts. >

< you left this behind. >

“why would you want to kill yourself?”

“freeze, mister!”

“because if you – if you didn’t wake up, i didn’t know what i would do.”

“yesterday, i was planning to jump off a really tall bridge and kill myself.”

“truth is, i’m scared.”

“what on earth are you doing?”

“you are such a good kid.”

“i’m doing the best i can!”

“it was, hands down, the greatest test of courage ever.”

“starting tomorrow, i’ll look everyone in the eye. starting tomorrow, i’ll listen when people speak to me. starting tomorrow, i’ll be better.”

“are you listening to a word i’m saying?”

“__ said you came to the hospital.”

“it’s me. everything is always my fault.”

“then why were you crying just now?”

“i wanted to thank you for looking after my homeboy.”

“what’s going on? why won’t you look at me?

“you know, __ was by your side the entire time that you were in a coma.”

“i don’t know. i just… feel weird.”

< can we be friends? >

< that is awesome. >

< i wasn’t trying to hurt you. >

< this is my friend __. >

“i want you to listen to me carefully. i hate you.”

“what does it mean to be ‘friends’?”

“have a good day sweetheart.”

“i promise i won’t kill myself.”

“like they always say – what goes around, comes around.”

“i won’t run away from my problems anymore.”

“i’d never hate you. i hate myself.”

“anyway, welcome back.”

“i ruined that all on my own.”

“and in this dream, i was just ready to give up on everything.”

< i got a new cellphone. >

< i think i would be too ashamed to face __. >

< i never apologized. for all the stuff i did when we were kids. >

“why is __ lying in a hospital bed instead of you?”

“i can’t stand martyrs.”

“there’s no going back to the way things were.

“forget everything i said, okay?”

“i’m the world’s biggest loser.”

“woah, new threads? looks good on you.”

“listen, i really suck at life sometimes, especially when it comes to stuff like this.”

“don’t do me any favors, okay?”

“you can tell me anything. we’re best friends.”

“yes, sweetie, but you’ve got a heart of gold.”

“for the first time, i know what it feels like to have a true friend.”

“that’s enough, __. stop trying to drag everybody else down to your level.”

“did i even apologize for that?”

< the thing is, even though you were going through a lot, i was being selfish. focused on myself. >

< you can change. start now. >

< i want to apologize. make sure i do it right. >

< but i’m not as brave as you. >

< i wanted to talk more. with you. >

< friends. >

< i was hoping that maybe you could teach me how to live. >

< i am fine now. i promise. >

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bestvictim‌.

       “– i know we do.”  tegan’s still a little sore, all things considered.  they worry how she’s feeling, knows the exact way to take care of their wife no matter what.  there’s a smile as tegan rests in her lap.  “we could combine that.  what better date than to test out mattresses with your spouse.”

“ you’re right.  ”   OF  COURSE  THEY  ARE.  annie brushes hair away from tegan’s neck  ,  planting a kiss against the back of their neck.  and another one.  “  that’d be cute.  i don’t have work tomorrow.  ”  a kiss against the shell of their ear.  “  even if i did.  i would skip it.  all just for you.  ”

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takes a long sip of her drink.  she’s staring at her  PRETTY  WIFE  with those big eyes of hers.  “  we need to get a new bed.  ”  a playful wrinkle of her nose  ,  hand comes out to pull them into her lap.  “  and we need to go on a date.  ”

@bestvictim.

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anyways. vereena is baby, anne is feral. thanks for coming to my ted talk.